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The Paper Bag Princess
Idaia and Imliss in Alternate Utopic Modern Arda
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Idaia thought the dreams were real when she was little.

This does not significantly move her when she is nine, ten, eleven. When she was little little, like four or five, she believed that honey was made from melted gold and your stomach was literally located in your abdomen. Dreaming--fantasizing--that you're the Grieving Prince's lost wife reborn is--well, it's not exactly normal to have recurring, consistent internally and between them, literal dreams about it, but it's a reasonably normal fancy. There's self-insert RPF of it on the 'net. She looks it up, every so often, to see if it's gotten any better. It hasn't.

(She reminds herself that the character who exists in her head isn't any more based in reality than what any of these other girls think the Grieving Prince is like. She reminds herself that if she ever actually met him she would be inevitably disappointed when he failed to be the person she was imagining. But the discrepancy in imagining still makes those other girls' stories unappealing to her.)

(It's weird that Imliss also has the dreams, and that the two sets are consistent with each other, but obviously it's just that Imliss has heard enough detail about Idaia's dreams to have started regurgitating them.)

She makes peace with it. The dreams aren't all pleasant--some of them are downright traumatizing--but hey, the Prince's wife had to die somehow. She falls more and more in love with her imaginary Tyelcormo, and sighs and resigns herself to singleness forever because real boys can't compare to fictional ones, and if she had the cultural context to do so she would call herself a Pygmalion longing to make her Galatea live but she does not so she does not.

And then--

One day--

Wholly by accident--

She does the magic she can do in her dreams

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(They won.

 

It took centuries and left the continent in ruins, but they won, and it was over, and they began to rebuild. After an Age trees grew where Angband once stood. After three more Ages glaciers swallowed it, and then receded, and a ski resort was built. 


Eventually they figure out how to make sure mortals don't die. 

 

Eventually he is king of the world. He is good at it. There are too many people to know their names but then computers are developed and he has the next best thing.)

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Idaia kicks herself. It's real, it's all real, how could she not have figured it out, these are her memories, this is her self, and she almost lost it to--what? The social pressure not to think of yourself as more special than you are? Fuck that.

...

Oh, hell, Tyelcormo. At least he didn't die of grief--or if he did he got out of Mandos like Finwe apparently did, that's good--

She has to find him, has to let her family know she and Imliss are alive--

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They won too late, Idaia's dead, Idaia's dead, and the glaciers walk very slowly back and forth across the land and he and Huan climb every mountain on a newly rounded world, walks every path, does disaster relief, is unreachable even to his family (Maitimo probably has slipped a tracker into his wedding ring or something, but has the decency to pretend he hasn't.)

 

They won. They build a glorious new world. Idaia's dead. 

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Idaia has a minor breakdown over how much time he must have spent grieving her--the call him the Grieving Prince, she did that to him--and the starts planning.

She'll go to the capital, that part's easy. The king takes audiences--of course he does, he's Maitimo, he loves people--but it's not easy to get one, not competing with all the other people in the world who might want one.

She will dump an iceburg on the palace if that's what it takes to get the attention she needs but she doesn't think it'll come to that.

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The filtering process for the audiences is that you can buy them (money can be used to do other things! he also accepts bribes, though he's never altered his behavior because bribed. He's never pretended he's selling influence.) or you can escalate a concern to your local and then to your state governor, both of whom throw out claims to be the dead wife of the Grieving Prince.

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Yeah, she didn't really expect that to work. She expects to look like a crazy idiot, and then eventually for something to work and everyone who laughed at her to have to eat their words.

She goes to the capital. Getting attention somehow once she's there should be doable.

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It's a stunning city, very Elven, though the majority of the population here as anywhere else is human. No cars within city limits; Elves think they're too loud. Great trees lining the quiet streets, stunningly healthy and achingly old. Pretty buildings. Fountains. The palace. 

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She knows Maitimo. Imliss knows him better. She's not sure if getting someone's attention by osanwe from a distance works if they have it but you don't but it would be really, really dumb not to try.

Maitimo? It's me, Idaia. I have no idea how the fuck I'm not dead but this is in fact the case, I need to find Tyelcormo faster than humanly possible.

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...where are you? 

 

If this is some kind of prank we will take it very seriously.

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She sends him her location. Also memories of the house in Formenos, meeting him for the first time and being ecstatic to discover chocolate, and lighting the fields after the Darkening.

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And approximately a minute later a dozen uniformed officers find her and escort her palacewards.

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She has nothing to fear. She is who she says she is.

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And a minute later the King is blinking at her. "...how?"

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"I got--reincarnated. Me and Imliss both. I got my old life back as dreams but I didn't take them seriously until I accidentally did magic and then everything clicked..."

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"Is this the first time, got your old life back - all of it? - do you know if anyone else -"

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"Don't know if anyone else, yes all of it, no other lives that I know of."

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"I'm getting him. Sit down. Do you need anything -"

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"I need him to stop being in pain because I was dead for a long time and he thinks I still am. I can hardly think about anything else right now.

 

Uh. I should probably like eat something and drink something and get some sleep. Especially if it's going to be a while before he gets here."

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"I'll have those things brought in. Where's Imliss?"

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She names their hometown. "We figured that since I was haring off to look like a crazy person she'd be better able to get me out of trouble if she stayed home and kept looking sane."

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"Fair enough. He makes himself deliberately difficult to find, it might be a couple days..."

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"I understand why he would do that."

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"Not your fault."

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"It was supposed to be impassable for Elves. Did I drop my brain thinking I could rely on getting across like that without dying."

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"We all made a lot of mistakes."

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"And mine resulted in carving my husband's heart out with a rusty spoon for I don't even know how the fuck long."

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"Wasn't just you. Or even primarily you."

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"I just want us to be okay again."

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"Yes, I can imagine. I'm getting him."

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"Good."

And she will eat and drink and sleep and worry.

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And eventually - Idaia?

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Darling? I'm--where are you--I'm at the palace--

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Yeah, they said. I'm coming. How -

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She sends him literally everything she knows about it. How far out are you?

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Three hundred miles. We're flying, should be - forty minutes?

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Okay.

I don't know why I'm alive. But--if there's an afterlife--I would absolutely have clawed my way out of it to come back to you.

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I know. I know.

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I love you. I'm sorry I didn't realize the dreams were real sooner.

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We've got time - would have been weird when you were five anyway -

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True.

I love you very much.

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I love you too. 

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I loved you even when I thought you weren't real.

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I can't even think where to start to make it up to you-

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...What?

You grieved me for I don't even know how many thousands of years; I had a bit of an unpleasant time and then woke up and had a good childhood--I've been happy--why are you the one who needs to make anything up to me?

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We left you to die!

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I was supposed to be on the boats. You were unconscious. I'm fine.

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I'm glad you're fine.

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I wish you were fine.

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Then just be real.

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I am. I'm real. I'm sorry it took me so long to claw my way out of the afterlife or whatever but I'm real and here and in a little while you can hold me again.

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Not your fault. Not your fault at all. Oh, Idaia Idaia Idaia -

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I'm here. I'm here. I love you so much.

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And a car takes her to the airport and the officers escort her to wait on the tarmac and the plane lands and then he's racing over to pick her up.

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She clings to him as tightly as physically possible.

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He doesn't, he'd break her. But he clings.

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Oh, dearheart, I love you, I love you so much.

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Idaia Idaia -

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I'm right here, sweetie, I'm here and alive and oh I missed you even when I thought you weren't really real to miss I'm so glad we have each other back--

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It's been thirty thousand years.

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Oh.

 

Oh, dearheart.

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Hugs hugs never letting go.

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That sounds about right, yep. Such hugs.

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If he gets to decide they will not move for hours.

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He had to endure thirty thousand years without her. He totally gets to decide.

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Then in hours he will pick her up and consent to a car carrying them back to the palace.

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People are probably going to stare. She is not wholly comfortable with this so she will just bury her face in him and not look out any windows.

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He is not even going to notice this is a thing.

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Fair enough. She can worry about it later. For now she can just focus on him.

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"Tell me all about - this life -"

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She tells him about their new parents and hometown and a series of endearing childhood anecdotes and her disappointing foray into RPF and everything she can think of.

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"You poor - I should have published enough of the truth you could verify your dreams - I'm so sorry - is any of the war even public knowledge anymore?"

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"Not really, no."

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"Did someone tell you everything?"

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"I don't know anything that happened--after."

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"We won."

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"...Okay, well, I guessed that part."

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"Hey, you never know, maybe we lost and this is the afterlife."

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She giggles and attempts to snuggle closer but is thwarted by the extant thoroughness of the hug. "Well, I did say guessed, not knew."

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"Humans awakened, turned out to be pretty great. We got more extradimensional help. I think I might be a magnet for it or something. The locals were mostly still alive and kind of jerks but Lúthien's cool - her you must have heard about in school -"

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"Well, not all the way that far back, but yeah."

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"She and Huan get along, I used to - sort of visit. Sometimes. Go within osanwë range and let Huan run off."

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"I can't possibly think ill of someone Huan likes."

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"My father said he'd try resurrection after it ended. He did try. He tried really hard."

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"I believe you. I wish it had worked."

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I love you so much. My fault or not I hate that you got hurt like this.

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Yeah. It's okay. We have the rest of forever.

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You suffering is not okay. But yeah.

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Oh, god, Idaia, I missed you.

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I know you did. You know people call you 'The Grieving Prince,' right? she asks wryly.

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No, I didn't, that'd require paying attention to people.

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They do! I am kind of not looking forward to the media fallout when it becomes reasonably public knowledge that your wife is back from the dead and me.

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We could just go to a pretty island somewhere for a hundred years and ignore them all.

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This is actually really tempting except for parts like "I don't want to go a hundred years without frequent contact with my sister and she wouldn't want to come live on a tropical island with us" and "the war is long since over and the internal family drama seems to have resolved in one way or another and what if we want to have kids in less than a hundred years, they should be able to socialize with people their own age."

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Well. We can just not give a fuck about them.

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Okay.

I love you so much.

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Never should have let it happen. Never going to let anything hurt you again.

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...To what extent, because I'm pretty sure childbirth still hurts...

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...I'm not ready to think about that yet. By the time I am we'll have a lot more tech, probably. The world's growing fast.

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Yeah, it is.

Love you.

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Love you. Want that with you, thought about it sometimes. Just. Not yet, I only just have you back -

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Yeah, definitely.

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You're alright? You're happy?

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In general? Absolutely. Right now? With the exception of the fact that you had to mourn me thirty thousand years.

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Over now.

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Yeah. I'm here. I'm right here and I love you so much--

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Never ever going to let you go.

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'Kay. Another noble but futile attempt to increase level of snuggle.

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After a while he starts singing.

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She listens for a little while, picks up the key and starts humming softly.

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Snuggles and singing and kisses.

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Mmmkisses she was not going to go for kisses independently because it is actually kind of hard to not just wind her fingers in his hair right now but since they are happening she will definitely enjoy them.

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Light, careful, exploratory kisses, like he is trying to remember what it felt like.

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Oh.

Well.

She remembers everything, and since they are married this means she does in fact contain information on what this felt like from his end, would he like her to share that?

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Yes.

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Their wedding night--that one time she had to conjure a shrubbery on the way back from Tirion--everything she can think of.

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How old are you right now-

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Seventeen, physically.

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What's the law -

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Twenty.

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More chaste, careful, exploratory kisses. Years are shorter now. A lot shorter.

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Not short enough!

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I missed you so much. Idaia Idaia -

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Oh, darling.

 

 

It is completely unfair to expect me to be in constant, largely full-body physical contact with you for the next three years and chaste.

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I see your point.

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Also, psychologically I'm not seventeen, psychologically I'm a Kilaiuossan fifty-three--admittedly only early twenties by this system but still--plus the Years spent in Valinor, plus seventeen years here. The reasons for age of consent laws do not apply to me here.

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I generally don't give a fuck what everyone says but 'the grieving prince doesn't let his child bride leave his sight' would be a bit much.

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One, I imagine I'm not leaving your sight regardless of whether or not we have any sex, two, can't we just make Maitimo declare me legally my actual age or something.

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We could do that.

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And then we don't have to bet that I won't run out of willpower some time in the next three years under highly tempting circumstances.

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What would that look like?

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At a guess burying my hands in your hair and kissing you as deeply as possible and remembering things like our wedding night at you.

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Okay, that'd probably work.

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I mean, if you actually don't want to have sex with me for the next three years, I can learn to deal, but if it's just that you feel like we shouldn't...

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Kind of not - there - yet - but I bet I"ll want to.

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Okay. It's probably a good idea to have Maitimo declare me legally old enough first, anyway.

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Yes. Let's have that happen. And legally married, that's important.

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We can just get Maitimo to declare that one so too, right? Obligatorily ostentatious royal wedding does not appeal more when we're royals over more people.

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Yeah, definitely.

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Oh, good.

I love you so much. I'm so glad I decided to challenge you to arm-wrestling.

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I'm so glad you came back.

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Me too.

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Thought that was just - it.

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I'm so sorry.

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Not your fault.

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It's still not okay that that happened to you.

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You dying was not okay but it wasn't a thing that happened to me.

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You having to deal with it for thirty thousand years was.

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Over now.

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Yeah. I'm right here. I love you so very very much.

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And they get to the palace and he carries her inside and tells Nelyo from a distance that he should declare her of age and them married and has a suite been set up for them? (Yes. It has.)

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Also, Idaia would like to know what other people know about the situation.

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That I sent for Tyelcormo urgently.

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Do you have any plans for how/when that changes?

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Rather up to the two of you.

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I don't want to be a secret and I don't want to be a sensationalist news story either and I am rather concerned about the possibility of having to pick one of those.

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It will be a challenge for a dead person reincarnating not to be a sensationalist news story even without you being the Grieving Prince's lost wife.

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Yeah. Ugh.

Do I have to interact in any way with being a sensationalist news story?

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I shouldn't think so.

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Let's get Imliss first, and maybe our new parents--they shouldn't have to deal with it either--but yeah, that sounds like the lesser evil.

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I'll send someone for them.

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Thanks. You okay?

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I am very glad you're okay.

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I have no earthly clue how it happened but I'm not complaining!

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Once Imliss and your parents are here I will ask them about how to break the story, okay?

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Yeah, okay.

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You overwhelmed? I can manufacture a distraction for Tyelcormo if you need a break at some point.

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I'm a little overwhelmed by the whole 'thirty thousand years' thing, but the best thing for that is to help him heal as much as possible; I'm a little overwhelmed by the whole 'sensational news story' thing but distracting Tyelcormo isn't really productive towards making me not need to deal with that.

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Okay. Let us know if you need anything.

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I will. Let me know when my legal situation's been fixed?

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I will.

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Thanks.

 

I'm glad you're real. I mean--I knew the King was real, I knew the royal family was real, but I didn't know the people in my dreams were real, even though they were supposed to be those people.

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I can imagine. I wish we'd known to be looking.

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How?

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We might have to figure out how this happened to guess whether we could have anticipated it.

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So far the closest thing I have to a hypothesis is 'managed to claw our way out of the afterlife if there is one somehow or something'.

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Shame you don't remember it. That'd be quite a story.

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No kidding. I wish I could be--more helpful, to people whose dead loved ones haven't had miracles happen...

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We will be trying very hard to figure it out. 

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Good.

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I'm convening people to explain that we're declaring you legally Idaia.

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Okay. Thanks for the update.

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Is there a way of announcing this that will be upsetting to your current parents, such that we should be really sensitive to that?

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If they find out when literally everyone else does instead of being contacted beforehand this will upset them.

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I'm sending people for them. I mean that we're declaring you to be legally someone else.

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...If declaring me to be myself necessitates declaring me not related to them they won't be best pleased but they'll understand.

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Shouldn't inherently necessitate it. How quickly do you want me to get you declared yourself, because I can do it more exactingly and consult with them first if I have a few days.

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Waiting a few days is fine.

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In that case we'll do that.

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Okay.

She updates Tyelcormo on the situation.

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Blah blah blah politics blah blah blah official declarations?

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Blah blah few days blah my parents blah.

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As long as you stay right here in my arms.

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Yeah.

 

...You know this has not actually made me less sad that I can't introduce you to my original parents, but...

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I'd be happy to be introduced to this set!

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They're great. Not the same way the originals were, but.

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Wish you could have gotten them back too.

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Would've been nice.

 

No one's going to think grieving is the most salient possible adjective to describe me with if I never get them back.

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Good.

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She kisses him. She can't quite manage light-exploratory-chaste but she stops short of "openly seductive."

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And he will sit down and hold her tightly and sing.

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And she closes her eyes and puts her head on his shoulder and hums along.

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And meanwhile some people arrive at their family home.

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"Just a moment!" someone calls from inside when the door is knocked on. "...Ah. Hello," the woman says when she opens the door and sees who's on the other side.

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"Hi! No one's in trouble, but we want to talk with you - it's about your daughters - is this a good time?"

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"Now is fine."

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"Is anyone else home?"

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"My husband's at work and Imliss went to the library half an hour ago. I'm guessing you know better than I do where Idaia is right now."

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"Oh, good, if she told you what was going on this'll go faster. She and Imliss are reincarnations of people we knew from the First Age of the world; she was able to prove it."

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"Yes. She's been telling her father and I about the dreams her whole life--the general strokes, if not the details--and I was there when she accidentally did magic and realized it was all true."

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"So we're convening to discuss announcing her legally to be a reincarnation of Idaia Zavari Lessnari and anticipating a rather sensationalist news story which we wanted to get out ahead of when it comes to your family. She's going to be living in the palace awhile, are you going to want to be there when this all breaks? Is there a good way to keep in touch?"

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"How much detail are you releasing on who she is when she's not going by 'Zavari Lessnerai'?"

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"That seems like something you and your husband and Imliss might want to weigh in on."

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"Rather, yes. I'm sure Imliss would rather be closer to her sister whatever else ends up happening."

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"What's she doing, how easily can it follow her to the capital?"

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"She's learning things. I'm sure she's not going to be less able to do that in your vicinity."

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"And the two of you?"

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"I'm a librarian. My husband is a pharmacist. You'd know better than I would how--relocatable--those things are.

...I'm sure you can imagine I have intensely complicated feelings about this situation."

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"Just a little. Can we be reassuring there?"

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"I don't know. I--

I love them both so, so much. I am intensely glad they are my daughters. But they wouldn't have been if they hadn't died horribly. When Idaia did magic by accident she filled the room we were in with ice. I hate that that happened to them but the idea of--giving that up--choosing for that not to have happened--I would. But it would hurt more than anything has ever hurt."

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He nods.

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"I should come," she murmurs. "You don't--know the habits they've developed in this life--I think Imliss has issues she didn't before--if you can't find me meaningful librarian work in the capital I'll come anyway, I can always return to it later, because of your family--their family--I have all the time in the world..."

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"I am pretty sure finding librarian work won't be a problem. Do you require assistance with moving out of here, should we delay the announcements until you've had time to resettle -"

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"Need? Technically not, I'm sure. Would like? Absolutely. And--that might be for the best, is there any reason to announce things sooner than later?"

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"I think my brother Tyelcormo wants Idaia legally declared his wife sooner rather than later but we're Elves, a month would be fine."

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"Oh, does the announcement need to be made for the legalities to be cleared up?"

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"A dozen people need to sign off for the legalities to be cleared up, and a sensationalist secret known to a dozen people outside our family ought to be assumed to not be a secret very long after that."

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"Well, given that the anecdote about your youngest brothers saying your-brother-the-King talked people out of their souls and keeping them somewhere cozy and well-lit and singing to them and Imliss agreeing after she had known him for a while actually happened, I'm a little surprised, but in general that makes sense."

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"I mean, could Nelyo just wave his hand and make it true? Yes, but we don't know if your daughters are the only people, if there's a way to cause this to happen, if there are others who didn't have the magic and just dismissed the dreams..."

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"Yeah, that makes sense."

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"So, all nice and orderly, even if that means some needless waiting."

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"Alright. This all sounds fine to me, but I shouldn't do anything about it until the others get home and we've had a chance to talk about it. Can I get you anything in the meantime? A snack, a beverage, an effusively complimentary book someone wrote on your music?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Any of those sound lovely!"

Permalink Mark Unread

She acquires all three of these things. "You know, as a librarian it's really surreal to me to have a daughter who in a past life introduced the printing press to this universe."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I can imagine. It was lovely, tremendously helpful in the war."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I'm sure she'll be glad to hear that."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Should I give you some space to process all this?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"I'll be fine. I'm not less able to process with you around, and I'm sure Imliss will be glad to see you when she gets back."

Permalink Mark Unread

"When's that?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"She didn't say. Probably at least half an hour from now."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I will be happy to wait."

 

And he seats himself and closes his eyes.

Permalink Mark Unread

Okay.

She's not going to actively start packing up the house to move without talking to her family, but she can tidy things to make them more packable later and cook with perishables and sit down opposite him with an old favorite book.

Permalink Mark Unread

And eventually there are the sounds of feet outside and then the door opens and a familiar voice calls, "Mom, I'm--" before she sees him and cuts off.

Permalink Mark Unread

"Hi. Long time, no see, hmm?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Oh, good, Idaia got in to see you guys without ending up on the news, I wasn't sure she was going to manage that," she says, and then walks over and hugs him.

Permalink Mark Unread

"Osanwë still works fine. She interrupted the King in an important meeting, though I don't think he told her that." Hugs.

Permalink Mark Unread

"Given that if she had any way of telling if it was a convenient time to be interrupted she wouldn't have needed to get his attention in the first place because she would have to already have had it I don't think she's going to feel especially guilty over that one.

 

I missed you guys kind of a lot."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Likewise. How -"

Permalink Mark Unread

"I don't know! We thought we were just having weird dreams until less than a week ago!"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Must have been quite a week. Anyway, Idaia's well, I was asked to come by to work out with the rest of your family how and when we want the news to break."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Ohhh yeah that's a thing we're going to have to deal with um."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Yep, exactly. You can decide how you want to deal with it but short of keeping it a secret it'll be a sensation."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I realize that. What've you got so far?"

Permalink Mark Unread

Her mother summarizes things.

Permalink Mark Unread

"...Uh, there is kind of a problem with the idea of waiting a month and it's that I don't think they waited a month to get married the first time and until that gets fixed we're technically three years under the age of consent."

Permalink Mark Unread

"This is a concern the King's apprised of. Might just pardon it but that doesn't set a great precedent."

Permalink Mark Unread

"It really doesn't!"

Permalink Mark Unread

"So faster than a month would be useful."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Yeah, agreed."

Permalink Mark Unread

"How fast are you guys going to be able to move to the city?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Uhhh good question, I'm not sure. I don't think we've ever moved before. Not while Idaia and I were alive, anyway. I don't really know how long it takes to move..."

Permalink Mark Unread

"If we have reason to want it done in under a month, help would definitely be appreciated."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Help is definitely a thing we can provide!"

Permalink Mark Unread

"I hope this whole business doesn't spill over onto my parents. There's no way you'll get them to move to the capital."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I have no idea if it will, but we can try to at least make sure it minimally does."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Thanks."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Should they hear the news from us?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"That would definitely be better than hearing it from the news."

Permalink Mark Unread

"How many people should hear it before it makes the news, do you have a list of names?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Not off the top of my head, but I can compile one."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I would appreciate it."

Permalink Mark Unread

She grabs a pen and a pad of paper and starts writing down names.

Permalink Mark Unread

And he hugs Imliss. "It's good to have you back."

Permalink Mark Unread

"You'd think that thinking you weren't real would make me not miss you, but actually all it meant was that I didn't hope I would ever get to stop missing you. I mean. I knew that you were real, but--you the public figure and you the person I knew were--different things, I had no reason to think you were actually who I wished you were..."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I am very glad that we are!"

Permalink Mark Unread

"I mean, given that you are, obviously!"

Permalink Mark Unread

"I am also here to answer questions, if anyone has any."

Permalink Mark Unread

"So how upset were their respective dads when Maitimo and Findekano got married?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"It took them a couple thousand years to come around."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I am less sorry about missing that part than most of the rest of it."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Were you expecting there to have been a wedding party you'd missed?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"No, I didn't say I'm surprised."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Dad's issue was not with Nelyo marrying a man."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Somehow I can't say that shocks me."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I take it everything else is adequately in the history books?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Not really? I have no idea how the war went after--everyone got to the other side."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Wow, really? That's - a long one, but I suppose we have time now."

Permalink Mark Unread

"That we do."

Permalink Mark Unread

 

"When we arrived we learned you two weren't the only interdimensional visitors. It was - a good moment for it. Pityo died in the boats, you two - hadn't been on the boats, but we still thought you were safe until Tyelcormo woke up - the Enemy sent everything he had at us the minute we arrived, and there was a few weeks of horrible senseless slaughter in which we had the upper hand but it helped morale less than you'd think. And when every orc that had been ordered to run at us was dead - and there were so many orcs - we charged Angband, and then he broke out the real terrors in his arsenal. We drove them off. But Father was dying.

 

And then someone pops up having witnessed - I don't know how much she saw - we thought she was a Maia, right approximate power level, but it was eventually explained she was from another world. Had something to heal Father. Had - you know, we always thought 'well, the Valar tried fighting Morgoth last time and it was a long and terrible war, perhaps they can't do better than that'. And they can't. Because they suck, not because their powers don't permit it. I think Alcallah's weaker than Yavanna, if faster-"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Oh, so that's where she comes from. She might be more creative, too, I went to one of her lectures once."

Permalink Mark Unread

"The Trees could be faulted in many respects but they weren't really very unoriginal. Anyway, shortly after that, Melkor offers us a parley, which it'd be stupid to go to but which is tempting because he swears we'll come to no harm and he's offering a Silmaril and a year to evacuate the continent, says his grievance is with the Valar."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Oh dear."

Permalink Mark Unread

"We were debating what to do. She goes 'I could make you biological bodies you can puppet remotely, send those?'"

Permalink Mark Unread

"How much awful did that avert?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Depends whether you're comparing it to 'we go in person' or 'we stay home', but we'd all have died, if we'd gone in person. It was an ambush. Enemy's good with illusions, if he makes an oath can't trust he's actually speaking it."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I'm glad that didn't happen."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Yep. So from there we shore up our positions and make contact with the locals and heal everyone we could - from the other host, too, when we found out they'd marched across the Ice - and then started thinking how to kill the Enemy. 

You know those fungi that can grow in ants' brains, affect their behavior?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"...Yes?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Started experimenting to see if she could do it with orcs. I, um, know, on the ethics, but -"

Permalink Mark Unread

"But Morgoth, yes."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Valar did something useful and put the Sun and Moon up. Moon first, it glowed on its own back then - don't ask -"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Don't ask you or don't ask anyone because I am actually curious about that."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I mean, the answer is just really unsatisfying. They weren't the Moon and the Sun, they were fruits of the dying trees carried on chariots through the sky. ...cosmology got normal later, but it's not a happy story -"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Okay."

Permalink Mark Unread

"So we settle in, there's a battle, we besiege Angband, and they finally get somewhere on the deeply unethical human experiments. Well, orc experiments - humans had also made their appearance by then, but well away from the main fight - and the first set of orders we try is kill all the prisoners in Angband as quickly as possible - Enemy was being horrible to them - and it works.

 

So then it's just a question of what set of orders to give. You know of Lúthien, right? I think half the population's descended from her at this point..."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I'm pretty sure I'm in the other half, but yeah."

Permalink Mark Unread

"She's not better than me at music. She is better at specific kinds of magic music but only because she has an outrageous advantage. 

 

She got a sleep song that could take down a Vala working. We worked with the Dwarves and got record players working. And then Alcallah got more sets of orders for orcs. Play the song, was one set. 'grab Morgoth's crown and run when you get the chance' was the other one. We attacked Angband at the same time as activating that, the orcs didn't manage to get the Silmarils out the gates but we managed to batter them down -

 

And then we had the Silmarils and Father at his leisure, only not really because does he ever even take breaks, figured out how to use them to kill a Vala. And then we were all very patient while he additionally figured out how to do it while slowing down the crumbling of the continent we'd landed on, enough that everyone could get off. And then we won."

Permalink Mark Unread

 

 

"I'm glad you won. I'm glad she showed up."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Yeah."

Permalink Mark Unread

She hugs him again.

I--I'm not going to spend my time wishing I hadn't died. It sucks in a lot of ways but I can't change it and I have parents I love. I did miss you, though, I'm glad I don't have to do that anymore. I love you.

Permalink Mark Unread

Love you too. Honestly I was expecting some yelling-at-us.

Permalink Mark Unread

It's been thousands of years. What would even be the point?

Permalink Mark Unread

If it made you feel better...

Permalink Mark Unread

Knowing you're real makes me feel better. Knowing I'm going to see everyone again soon makes me feel better. Knowing Findekano forgave Maitimo makes me feel better. Being able to move on with my life makes me feel better. Rubbing salt in the wounds when you've spent thousands of years missing us wouldn't make me feel better.

Permalink Mark Unread

Maitimo didn't know about the ships. Father hadn't told him. They nearly came to blows over it - I - intervened, I did not want to watch my father draw a weapon on his son - and then he refused to participate in it.

Permalink Mark Unread

Doesn't surprise me that your dad decided to pull something without telling Maitimo about it first again, after the time he pulled a sword on Nolofinwe.

Permalink Mark Unread

We didn't think anyone'd crossed the Ice, we didn't know they were in danger until - Tyelcormo woke up -

Permalink Mark Unread

Idaia was so scared that her death would literally kill him.

Permalink Mark Unread

Don't think it could, at first. The oath.

Permalink Mark Unread

When she knew it was real the first thing she said was, "Oh, god, I really did that to him."

Permalink Mark Unread

Well, not on purpose.

Permalink Mark Unread

Doesn't change the fact that everyone knows him as the Grieving Prince.

Permalink Mark Unread

We have forever. He'll be okay.

Permalink Mark Unread

Yeah. But it's going to take her a little time to get over how much suffering she caused him, however not-her-fault.

Permalink Mark Unread

Is it going to take her longer than him?

Permalink Mark Unread

I don't know. Best guess is she's not going to be completely okay until he is but she's going to be more okay than him in the meantime.

Permalink Mark Unread

Alright.

 

 

 

However it happened I am glad it did.

Permalink Mark Unread

Agreed.

I don't know if I don't remember anything from being dead because there isn't anything or because it's less amenable to being dreamed back, but you guys are here, so even if I was in the nicest Heaven one could ask for I'm still glad I came back.

Permalink Mark Unread

And we did a pretty good job of Arda, I should think.

Permalink Mark Unread

It's a very nice place to come back to and grow up in!

Permalink Mark Unread

As nice as Valinor, not that I'm competitive.

Permalink Mark Unread

I mean, I never grew up there to compare. But Valinor had that nasty little homophobia problem, and this time and place does not. So I like this better.

Permalink Mark Unread

I'm glad. Do you have anywhere in particular you want to transfer to, research-wise -

Permalink Mark Unread

I'm mostly working on chemistry right now.

Permalink Mark Unread

Can do. 

Permalink Mark Unread

I'm quite sure. 

 

I can't wait to see everyone again.

Permalink Mark Unread

I assure you it's mutual. We can send a moving team here tomorrow, if that works for you.

Permalink Mark Unread

"Mom?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"That should be fine."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Done. I assume you all already chose to be immortal -"

Permalink Mark Unread

"I don't really understand why anyone doesn't."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Oh, I don't know, I've felt the temptation. People mourning your tragically short life, revisiting all your artistic achievements over and over again because there will never be more of them...if I were a sufficiently dramatic sort of mortal I'd definitely stay mortal."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I suppose. But if you don't even get to see it..."

 

Permalink Mark Unread

"Anyway, you're all immortal, which is lovely."

Permalink Mark Unread

"It is!"

Permalink Mark Unread


"And it doesn't sound like you particularly need anything besides a nice relocation?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"No, we're pretty much good."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Great.  In that case we will all look forward to seeing you in a few days."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Awesome."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Anything else..."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Uh, unless you want to wait around to meet my dad, probably not."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I'm happy to."

Permalink Mark Unread

"There's that then. So, um... How have you been doing?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Okay. Ruling the world suits some of us splendidly, some less."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Where do you fit on that spectrum?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"I like it fine."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I'm glad.

I don't need to ask how Tyelcormo feels but I'm sure he's glad he and therefore Idaia have access to a convenient way of getting her identity back."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Yeah, I'm glad we were easily accessible once you found out the dreams were real. It's probably ideal timing."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Oh?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"I'm not sure what we'd have done if twelve-year-old Idaia found us. Probably not rush her into Tyelcormo's arms, but they'd both be really irritated with us if we didn't -"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Oh that would have been so very awkward yes. I thought you meant in terms of when we came back, not when we realized it was all real."

Permalink Mark Unread

"It'd have been lovely if you came back with the first Men, yeah."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Oh well. We're lucky to be alive at all, I don't want to complain."

Permalink Mark Unread

"We tried to get resurrection working. Tried for a really long time."

Permalink Mark Unread

 

 

 

"Well, there's still a lot of other dead people, so once I've gotten--caught up on everything--and trained my magic back up to a reasonable strength we can see if we can get anywhere with the interactions between the systems, if we can get them to interact..."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Worth a try. It'd surprise me if you could get things that way, but maybe..."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I'm not saying it'll definitely work or anything, but it's worth trying, and unlike bending the Song of Creation to your will dreamshaping doesn't so far as I know have theoretical limits, so."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Perhaps in a few thousand years you'll be pulling out miracles to shame Father. Let's hope, at least."

Permalink Mark Unread

"That would be lovely. The world needs miracles a lot less than it used to--less than Kilaiuossa would have, I'm certain--but I'm sure it can be improved upon."

Permalink Mark Unread

"And maybe one of the miracles it can pull off is travel back there. Father's tried that, too, intermittently."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I doubt anything there besides the magic would be recognizable after all this time."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Yeah. But if there are other dimensions, we ought to find them somehow..."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Oh, definitely."

Permalink Mark Unread

"No luck so far but we'll see."

Permalink Mark Unread

"We'll see. And maybe even if we don't crack extradimensional travel ourselves we'll get yet another convenient visitor or something."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Magic had more power back in the old days, I think we might have had, hmmm, some pull that doesn't happen anymore?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Mmm. Yeah. I hope it doesn't just keep getting weaker forever, that sounds--worrisome after long enough."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Silmarils help! Father's been employing them to that end since we first noticed."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Oh, good. I'm glad."

Permalink Mark Unread

"The Valar have also gotten more - inert - don't know if the cause is the same."

Permalink Mark Unread

"...So, uh, how much are you on speaking terms with them these days? Public knowledge is not very detailed."

Permalink Mark Unread

"They eventually pardoned us. Father responded that he did not accept his pardon, not having done anything that'd require pardoning."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Yeah, somehow I'm not surprised.

 

 

I'm guessing Tyelcormo hasn't spoken to Orome in the intervening time?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Asked if there was anything he could do. He couldn't. Asked Mandos, he also said he couldn't."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Yeah, okay.

 

I hope for both their sakes he gets better quickly now."

Permalink Mark Unread

"He'll be fine."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I know. I just don't know how long it'll be in the meanwhile."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Probably more of an Elf timeline than a human one, but we have forever."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Yeah, that's true."

Permalink Mark Unread

And he conveys the relevant instructions and then waits for their father to come home.

Permalink Mark Unread

It takes him about another hour.

"...Ah," he says when he walks in the door and sees their guest, blinking at him. "Idaia managed to get your attention without getting on the news. Good."

Permalink Mark Unread

"That was Imliss's reaction exactly. We've discussed what to do -" and he summarizes.

Permalink Mark Unread

"We were all concerned about the possibility," he says. "That--should be fine, then, I can't say I'm thrilled by having to pack up and leave on short notice but it seems better than the alternatives..."

Permalink Mark Unread

"You're welcome to take your time, we're just not inclined to delay legal action very long."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Being swarmed by reporters is one of the things worse than leaving on short notice."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Well, we could also surround the neighborhood with soldiers. Not that I'm recommending it."

Permalink Mark Unread

"That would not meaningfully solve problems, no."

Permalink Mark Unread

"It would solve the hordes-of-journalists problem, but create some other ones, yeah. Though it'd create ones that were ours, not yours."

Permalink Mark Unread

He shakes his head. "The journalists aren't the core problem. We wouldn't--be able to go about our lives as normal. If everything is going to change drastically in a matter of days, it might as well be by moving as anything else."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Sorry."

Permalink Mark Unread

"It's not your fault," he sighs. "It's not anyone's fault, really."

Permalink Mark Unread

"And it's very good, if slightly inconvenient."

Permalink Mark Unread

He nods.

Permalink Mark Unread

"Anyway, I just stuck around to meet you and announce the plan, we'll have movers here when you're ready for them and we'll have people on the other end working on smoothing the transition. Thanks for taking good care of my sisters."

Permalink Mark Unread

He smiles.

"It was very much our pleasure."

Permalink Mark Unread

"See you soon!"

Permalink Mark Unread

Imliss hugs him again good-bye.

Permalink Mark Unread

Hugs. And then a flight home.

Permalink Mark Unread

And Imliss and her parents start packing.

Permalink Mark Unread

And he holds his wife and hums and kisses her cautiously and trembles.

Permalink Mark Unread

And she kisses him gently and alternates between stroking his cheekbone with her thumb and hugging him as tightly as her muscles allow her to sustain and rubbing his back in gentle, soothing circles.

Permalink Mark Unread

And eventually someone brings them in food and asks if they need anything.

Permalink Mark Unread

It is theoretically conceivable that at some point she might get bored of doing literally nothing but reassure her husband that she's alive so maybe some books so she can do that thing and also simultaneously read if it comes down to it.

Permalink Mark Unread

He is not going to get bored of her.

Permalink Mark Unread

And reading material presumably wouldn't help if he was. She's not anticipating getting bored any time soon, but she'd rather have a solution on hand if at any point she does.

Love you, she murmurs, goes to kiss his jaw, reminds herself, chaste, and kisses his cheek instead.

Permalink Mark Unread

I know, he says contentedly.

Permalink Mark Unread

Good. It's very very important.

Permalink Mark Unread

Glad you always knew I loved you even before knowing I was real.

Permalink Mark Unread

You are very good at making sure I know it.

Permalink Mark Unread

Good.

And cuddles.

Permalink Mark Unread

Cuddles are fantastic.

Eventually she falls asleep.

Permalink Mark Unread

He reads her dreams and is happy.

Permalink Mark Unread

And in the morning there is a flutter of pleased surprise when she is awake enough to register where she is and in whose arms but before she is awake enough to slot yesterday into its correct context.

Permalink Mark Unread

His vocabulary has not expanded. Idaia Idaia Idaia you're safe.

Permalink Mark Unread

Mhm. Y're warm, she tells him, still not entirely awake. S'good. Cozy. Not that I wouldn't snuggle you if you were made of granite and enjoy it.

Permalink Mark Unread

Not granite. Just me, right here.

Permalink Mark Unread

Just you. Love you so much. So glad you're real.

Permalink Mark Unread

So glad you're alive.

Permalink Mark Unread

I'm sorry I wasn't. I hate that I hurt you.

Permalink Mark Unread

Whatever. You are. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Yeah.

I love you so much.

Permalink Mark Unread

And hours of holding without speaking.

Permalink Mark Unread

She dozes off again for a bit., since this is so very cozy, and when she wakes again her stomach reminds her that breakfast is a thing that exists.

Permalink Mark Unread

And even that they can have brought to them!

Permalink Mark Unread

True. Although she'll want to eat sitting up, so that spilling is less likely. And she should change into clean clothes. ...And unbraid, brush and rebraid her hair, is that going to introduce problems?

Permalink Mark Unread

Not problems of the 'he wants to jump her' kind, he will still mostly cling.

Permalink Mark Unread

Clinging makes changing clothes a little tricky, but not impossible, and then she has performed Hygiene and they can go back to properly snuggling in a bed.

...At some point she's going to have to shower. She doesn't think this is going to cause the kind of problem where he wants to jump her, not if hairbrushing didn't, but she suspects it is going to cause--well, exacerbate--the problem where she wants to jump him.

Permalink Mark Unread

They can shower without him having to let go of her. It's a big shower.

Permalink Mark Unread

Yes? The problem is not that he will supposedly have to let go, the problem is naked, remember when she discovered Elves swim naked?

Permalink Mark Unread

They're going to straighten out the legalities. 

Permalink Mark Unread

That is good but she also does not want to pressure him into sleeping with her before he actually wants to.

Permalink Mark Unread

Well, I strongly don't want to let go of you in the shower. - I could stay clothed?

Permalink Mark Unread

...Well, I'm pretty sure you'd at least have to change into dry clothes after, but I guess that would reduce the amount of time you spent distractingly naked.

Permalink Mark Unread

That works.

Permalink Mark Unread

I want you--very badly, I think, if I let myself--but pressuring someone into sex before they're ready--before they want it--it's completely unconscionable and the idea of doing it to you makes my soul shriek in horror.

Permalink Mark Unread

I love you, dear, you're not going to hurt me. 

Permalink Mark Unread

 

 

I'm not sure you'd be capable of perceiving it as such if I did, right now.

Permalink Mark Unread

As long as you stay and are happy there's nothing you can do to hurt me.

Permalink Mark Unread

Oh, darling. Definitely not gonna leave.

...I think I'm just going to wait for you to initiate, at least the first time, you know how I feel about it and can just--do that or not, as you see fit, once the legal troubles are cleared up.

Permalink Mark Unread

Mmmmkay - Idaia, Idaia, Idaia - 

Permalink Mark Unread

Right here, sweetheart, never gonna leave you again.

Permalink Mark Unread

I know. 

 

And a shower.

Permalink Mark Unread

Washing herself, like changing clothes, is a little trickier with her beloved's arms to work around, but entirely doable.

Permalink Mark Unread

Good.

Permalink Mark Unread

And then they can both get into dry clothes and go back to snuggling.

Permalink Mark Unread

Even better.

Permalink Mark Unread

Yes, that.

More chaste kisses.

Permalink Mark Unread

"Tell me - about this life -"

Permalink Mark Unread

She thinks back to the last time he asked and starts filling in more details that she hadn't mentioned then.

Permalink Mark Unread

And he holds her and listens.

Permalink Mark Unread

She can keep talking for a long time. When her voice gets tired she switches to osanwe, dredging her memory for everything she can think of.

Permalink Mark Unread

 

 

"Okay.

 

And - and after you didn't get on the boats -"

Permalink Mark Unread

When we woke up and the boats were gone--

Nolofinwe's host was relieved to see us because they thought you might not come back for them but we were evidence against that.

Then the boats went up in flames.

Then Nolofinwe gave a speech.

Then we started across the Ice.

We held on--I don't know how long. It certainly felt like a long time.

Imliss died first.

Permalink Mark Unread

Permalink Mark Unread

It sucked. We're okay now.

Permalink Mark Unread

Good.

Permalink Mark Unread

Reincarnating was apparently enough of a--reset, in some ways--that I'm not horribly pessimistic anymore! And don't expect to start again unless something happens to warrant it!

Permalink Mark Unread

Nothing will happen. We're okay forever.

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Mhm.

She remembers the time he told her he was sure they were going to have a happy ending.

I wish it hadn't taken so long but you were absolutely right, you know.

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All we had to do was check you were on the boats - one stupid thing -

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I know. I know.

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I'm so sorry -

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You were unconscious. If you hadn't been--then everything would have been fine. I love you. It's not your fault.

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Should have not been unconscious.

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You got that way protecting me.

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Should have done it better.

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Maybe. But we can't change the past--shouldn't even if we could, all these people who exist and wouldn't if things had been different, we can't just kill them all...

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I have a family that isn't you and yours, now. It doesn't make me love any of you any less but I won't see my parents and grandparents dead and worse because they'd never have existed to spare you and I some grief, not when we have forever to recover from it.

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If I could make you not have died, I would.

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Okay.

Still can't, though. And I'm fine.

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I'm glad.

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I want you to be fine but I don't want you to push yourself to be something that looks like fine before you actually are fine to please me because that would probably make it take longer for you to actually be fine.

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Do I seem like the type?

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Not really but you've been hurting because I was dead for longer than I can imagine so I didn't want to bet when just saying doesn't cost anything.

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I won't pretend. Hugs.

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Hugs. I was more worried about repression than pretending.

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The whole 'literally never going to stop holding you' thing is me doing exactly what I want. Trust me.

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That much I expected! It's a good thing I love you so much or I might object to it.

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Squeeze. 

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Nuzzle.

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Mine.

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Mine, she agrees reciprocally with a squeeze of her own.

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For the rest of forever - Idaia Idaia Idaia-

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Forever. Oh, darling, I'm right here, nothing like that is ever going to happen again, I'm here forever...

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She kisses him. Someday we'll look back at this and laugh to think we ever cared so much for so short a span as we were separated. Someday, a very very long time from now.

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Yeah.

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She kisses him again and runs her fingers down the side of his face in a gesture similar to one she might have used to tuck a lock of hair behind someone's ear comfortingly in Kilaiuossa and starts singing softly a song about love lost and found again from the world of her first birth.

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He squeezes her and listens.

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And eventually she finishes the song, holding the last note and then letting it trail away.

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Love you. We'll be okay.

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That we will.

If we keep snuggling so cozily like this, I'm going to keep falling asleep on you, and that probably won't do my sleep cycle any favors.

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Well, we can go wander the city together but then cameras will be shoved in our faces.

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She makes a face. No, I'd much rather not that.

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Likewise.

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I can live with my sleep cycle being disrupted for a while, she shrugs.

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We could watch movies or something.

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I think I'd like that.

 

When I thought you weren't real and therefore didn't exist outside the story in my head that ended in the First Age I thought it was a damn shame it hadn't lasted long enough for you to see movies; they're a lot of what I love about reading novels but without the obvious obstacle to you enjoying them.

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Let's watch some movies, then.

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Okay! Do you have an opinion on where to start?

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Haven't seen anything.

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That shouldn't surprise me.

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Means I'll be all excessively impressed.

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She beams at him and kisses him on the cheek.

Do you think Maitimo thought ahead and we already have any or should we ask?

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Should be able to pull them up remotely, I think, not that I've paid the march of technology any attention.

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I meant do we have anything to do that with, I was rather in too much of a hurry to find you to pack anything of the sort.

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Bet there's computers in here somewhere.

 

There are.

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So she picks her favorite movie, and pulls it up, and watches it with her head on her husband's shoulder and a running commentary for his benefit.

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Idaia is lovely and amazing and endlessly fascinating. There's also a movie playing, or something.

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There is totally a movie playing. A good one. But she can't blame him for being distracted from it.

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He does not mean it as an insult to her taste in movies.

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If she thought it was she might be less likely to press brief kisses to his cheek and lips at opportune moments.

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He returns them. But lightly.

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She wasn't expecting anything else. Still nice.

Eventually the movie ends.

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"'Nother one?"

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"Sure!" She picks something in a different genre this time.

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The real genre continues to be 'his wife is alive.'

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She is! She is alive! And snuggled up oh so happily to him enjoying a somewhat wider range of positive emotions prompted by the movie than just snuggling elicits.

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He likes watching her watch movies.

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She likes cuddling him while not throwing off her sleep cycle!

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We could probably walk around within the palace camera-free. If you want.

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Yeah. ...I was. Sort of too busy fretting over you to see anyone else but Maitimo again before you got back. So I should do that. And possibly go 'welp that explains a lot' at Maitimo over Findekano.

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Doesn't it just?

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I'm actually sort of impressed with him-in-Valinor--when I thought it wasn't real, that the details I could confirm were just my mind borrowing details from the actual royal family, I always thought it was weird that the King-to-be never slipped up and did something that made it apparent-within-the-dream given that when I was awake it's not like it isn't public knowledge, now.

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When you weren't too painful to think about I kept remembering that conversation in the palace, when you were indignant because someone'd implied I was -

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Attracted to men? I think they outright stated it, not implied it, and I was indignant because they thought it was a bad thing and tried to use it to hurt you.

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 And he sends a memory:

 

 

 

 

 

People who want my cousins in charge. Jokes on them, because Irisse doesn't give a fuck and Findekáno's too good-spirited to arrest anyone for anything.

Permalink

And apparently Maitimo trusts him with the secret of the dungeons.

Permalink Pencil Cross

They're best friends, yeah. I don't know how they do it, when our fathers hate each other, but it's kind of heartwarming.

 

 

 

 

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I'm really glad they made up after everything. Findekano--took the boats burning really hard.

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Maitimo didn't even do it.

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After the sword incident we missed I kind of suspected.

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Hmmmm?

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When your dad pulled a sword on your uncle? Maitimo didn't have any idea that was going to happen and was rather exasperated with him after. Precedent for your dad doing something unhelpfully dramatic without telling Maitimo first.

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Ah.

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I told Irisse you were innocent by virtue of unconsciousness.

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Have you talked to her, since?

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Yeah, of course.

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It seemed likely but given how--not okay you were--

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I lived. Didn't spend the time a walking zombie.

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Good.

 

I wish I had talked to her more than once before--everything.

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You can now.

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Yeah.

I love you so much.

Permalink Mark Unread

Love you.

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I'm right here, I'm fine, I'm happy.

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I know.

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Good. 

I'm so profoundly lucky to have you.

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I missed you so much -

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I know. Hugs.

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Glad you're back.

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Me too.

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So were we gonna go outside?

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Yeah.

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He picks her up in a bridal carry and goes to the door and is thwarted by opening it while holding her satisfactorily.

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The answer to this problem is teamwork. She can open the door while he holds her satisfactorily.

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Yep! And then they can walk around the palace. Huan comes bounding up to them.

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Hey! I missed you! she tells him. It's really good to see you again.

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Huan wags his tail and sniffs her furiously.

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...Do I smell different? I'm pretty sure this body isn't genetically identical to my old one, that'd be a neat trick...

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"Apparently you still smell like you, though."

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"Well, I look like me and I sound like me, so that's not as surprising as it could be."

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"Did you want to see anyone else, or are we just getting a change of scenery -"

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"I would love to see anyone else."

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So about! There are people, but not ones she recognizes! And then -

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"Idaia! Tyelcormo!"

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"Hi! I'm not dead! Congratulations on being successfully discreet in Valinor, I wasn't even a homophobe at the time--did Maitimo ever tell you the anecdote where I threatened to flash someone--and I never even suspected a thing."

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"He did tell me. Eru, that was a long time ago -"

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"Don't remind me."

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"I'd have come back sooner if I could have."

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"I know."

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"Are you two headed anywhere in particular?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Change of scenery from 'snuggling in bed all day' and seeing various people I haven't seen in millenia."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Ah. Well, Tyelcormo's siblings who don't have jobs - which is most of them -"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Remind me what you do around here?"

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"I talk the King down whenever he is being a Feanorian."

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"Well, that's uniquely useful."

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"Hey," he says, faux-betrayed. "Feanorians do not require talking down."

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"Of course not. I do nothing at all; can't guess why he keeps me around, really. Anyway, the unemployed royals are all on your left, second door, talking."

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"It would have been so convenient if I had non-negligible Elf blood this time around, but nooo, I can't hear anything at all."

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He carries her off.

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And when they get to the door she will open it. Teamwork!

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"Hi, everybody!!"

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"Hi!"

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"Hi!" says Nerdanel.

"I totally bet we wouldn't see you for weeks," Amrod grumbles.

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"I am currently legally seventeen, unless Maitimo declared me legally myself without anyone telling us," she reminds him. "Having to pardon Tyelcormo for statutory rape would be really really awkward."

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"We were just going to figure there was no evidence, on that point!"

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"Better safe than sorry. Anyway, hi, I'm not dead, it's very exciting."

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"Good to see you, sis."

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"It is really good to see you too."

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"What's the plan?" one of the twins asks.

Permalink Mark Unread

"Which plan?"

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"For what you're doing?"

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"The plan is for him to literally not let go of me for the forseeable future and let Maitimo collaborate with Imliss and our new parents on when to break the news and not face civilization-in-general until we can do that without a dozen cameras getting shoved in our faces."

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"...gonna be centuries. Might still get cameras then."

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"The plan is not set in stone but we at least need some time to--adjust, first."

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"Also fuck 'em, none of their business."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Yes, also that."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Maitimo just adores opportunities to abuse his power for his loved ones, you could probably flatter him into banning cameras in the province."

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"If I were going to ask him to abuse power on our behalf I'd probably go with something more surgical like not putting peoples' pictures on the internet without written consent or something. So I hear you got married too while I was gone."

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"I did!! Not on purpose, mind."

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"...How do you accidentally marry a Dwarf?"

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"Mismatch of expectations!"

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"What kind?"

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"Well, we were happily getting along without any interest in the institution of marriage, for centuries, and then one day she said she was expecting a child, so then I concluded, horrified, that we'd in fact been married for centuries and should have a visible bond why hadn't I ever noticed it, and then I did, just like that."

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"I'm trying to imagine how you fail to notice that."

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"I mean, we weren't married until I realized that it should have been the case we were married, and then we were."

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"Oh, that makes much more sense."

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"It really doesn't make any sense, but it happened."

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"It's somewhat less nonsensical," she amends. "Anyway. Congratulations insofar as those are appropriate so long after the fact."

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"Thank you! Congratulations on being alive."

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"I'm really excited about it!"

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"We all are!"

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"It's good to be back. Imliss was--worse at coping, than I was, when we thought you were all an elaborate fantasy."

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"Oh?"

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"I was...wistful, a lot, but I was usually not actively upset about it? Imliss...was fine most of the time but every now and then she was just utterly miserable."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Do you know what about, exactly?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Thinking you weren't real didn't make her not miss you guys, it just made her think she was categorically never going to be able to stop missing you."

Permalink Mark Unread

"That does sound like it'd screw with your head. And she didn't think to - I don't know, watch the State of the Empire and check whether Maitimo matched -"

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"Anything we were able to observe the same between reality and our dreams we just assumed that we had observed the things to be real before we dreamed about it and obviously anything we knew about the real versions would be incorporated into the dream versions. We were really confused that we never knew about him and Findekano in the dreams."

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"So were the rest of us, after the war ended when they started going about!"

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"Hey, in our defense we didn't actually spend that much time in Tirion watching the two of them interact before we went off to Formenos."

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"And in our defense Maitimo's such a good liar."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Yeah. It's a good thing he uses his powers for good instead of evil."

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"I really doubt he could. They sort of spring from caring about everyone so much."

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"Yeah, he's really great."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Should someone be fetching Imliss for royal hugs? Is someone doing that?"

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"He said he would send someone for her and our parents."

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"Oh, good. Okay."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Maybe I should ask him for more details about that."

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"I mean, I'm sure it's taken care of, but it'd be nice to know when they're arriving."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Yeah, exactly."

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Nelyo?

Permalink Mark Unread

Mm-hmm?

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When's Imliss coming?

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Tomorrow.

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He reports this.

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"Awesome."

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"Yeah. I'm so - you were right here this whole time -"

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"Not the whole time. Less than two decades."

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Sigh. "Yeah. But still."

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"Well, I'm here now, and that's what's important."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Very very important. Who else did you want to see -"

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"Who else is free right now?"

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"I think everyone is at minimum interruptible."

Permalink Mark Unread

"I want to see everyone eventually but I'm not really picky about order."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Fair enough. Shall we go knock on doors?'

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"Okay!"

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Door-knocking! Most of his brothers are in.

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It's really good to see them all again.

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Yeah.

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And also to reassure people that no one is going to need to get pardoned for statutory rape!

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People courteously weren't expressing worry about that!

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Kind of them.

I'm really glad everyone's okay.

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Me too.

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It would have been so easy for things to be any way other than this.

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I thought they were.

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I know. But I'm here now, and you never have to let go of me again. Snuggle.

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And I never plan to. I'm so glad I didn't somehow find you before you remembered, I'd have terrified you -

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I could never be scared of you, dearheart. I'd have recognized you even if I didn't have the foggiest clue what I was recognizing. She kisses him on the nose.

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Awww. I believe you.

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Good.

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Imliss and their parents arrive the next day.

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He will have to go with Idaia to see them, since otherwise he'd have to stop touching her.

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"Dearheart, these--these are my parents. Mom, Dad--"

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"Hi."

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Idaia's mother steps forward and hugs them both. "It's an honor to finally meet you. My name is Anna Fell. Thank you for existing, it's going to do wonders for both of my daughters' baseline happiness."

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"I'm glad to hear that. Thank you for taking good care of them."

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"I'm their mother. How could I do any less?"

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He squeezes Idaia. "So I hear they relocated you?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Yes. Much easier to deal with impeding fame this way."

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"That. Ugh."

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"Worth it."

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Cling. "Definitely. But I mostly haven't had to deal with it."

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"It hasn't actually happened yet. Going to in the next few days, I think, but hasn't yet."

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"I could just ask Maitimo to start censoring everything, he would probably be persuadable if I tried very hard..."

Permalink Mark Unread

"In which direction?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Our lives not being something people are entitled to have opinions about?"

Permalink Mark Unread

"Good luck with that."

Permalink Mark Unread

"My brother's a miracle worker."

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"So I've heard."

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"Maybe I'll bother it about him some other time, though. Where are you guys staying?"

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"Here as a stopgap measure until we can move into a house."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Sounds good. Idaia, do you need anything -"

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"I would like to have access to my stuff but that's not urgent on any particular timescale."

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"Okay." Squeeze. Then he will sit here and let her talk to her family.

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She confirms with them that she really didn't do anything newsworthy and it wasn't just Maitmo covering it up and they tell her about finding Macalaure on their doorstep and there are hugs.

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In which he is an awkward participant due to unwillingness to let Idaia out of his arms.

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No, it's fine, they can just hug him as well as her and he doesn't have to reciprocate.

Permalink Mark Unread

That makes it easier.

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It's only awkward if you let it be!

And eventually Idaia has interacted sufficiently with her family and can be transported back to their room for more snuggles.

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Good.

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"I'm glad he seems mostly okay, now. Considering--everything."

Permalink Mark Unread

"Yeah."

Permalink Mark Unread

They find their temporary rooms and settle in. Imliss decides to go exploring.

Permalink Mark Unread

It's a very distinctly Elven palace but very different than Tirion's. And it's huge. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Yeah.

She considers osanweing someone but she doesn't know who's busy and who's not and doesn't want to--insert herself--if someone's busy.

Permalink Mark Unread

Well, after a while someone walking through the halls will say "Imliss! The King wants to see you."

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ohgood.

She asks directions.

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She is directed.

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She goes and finds him. ...She hopes there aren't a lot of other people around.

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He's in his office. It's empty. He hugs her.

Permalink Mark Unread

She hugs him as hard as her human arms will get her and cries.

Permalink Mark Unread

He hugs her back and doesn't say anything for a while.

Permalink Mark Unread

 

"I missed you," she says after the tears have stopped. "...I thought you weren't real, I thought I was making you up, and I still missed you--I thought, all of forever, someday I'm going to meet the King, and I--didn't know if I would hate him for not being you or love him for how close to you he would have to be--"

Permalink Mark Unread

I missed you very dearly. I am glad you found us.

Permalink Mark Unread

I'm sorry we didn't just get on the damn boats when you told us to.

 

I wouldn't be apologizing for that to any of the others but Macalaure said you tried to stop them--

Permalink Mark Unread

It was a terrible decision. I understand why he made it and what he was afraid of but it was a terrible decision.

Permalink Mark Unread

Yeah. I don't--there's no point in being mad at him about it, it's been thousands of years--but it was a terrible decision and if Tyelcormo had been awake to realize we were missing I'd be glad we'd accidentally stayed behind.

Permalink Mark Unread

Might've swayed him, yeah. I'm not sure. He was in a pretty terrible place.

Permalink Mark Unread

 

Yeah, that reminds me. Idaia should probably not have contact with Galadriel in the near future. I mean, not that I thought that was super likely by default, but, yeah.

Permalink Mark Unread

It has been thirty thousand years. What is she likely to do?

Permalink Mark Unread

I don't think she's likely to do anything, but--we haven't experienced all the time in between, and last time we were interacting with her she was--almost certainly partly responsible for burning the boats, and she wasn't someone it would be painful to have strong negative emotions towards, so. I think it could be unpleasant for Idaia to have to be polite to her before she's had more time to get used to the dreams being real but it being thirty thousand years later.

Permalink Mark Unread

Well, I can definitely arrange that. Thank you.

Permalink Mark Unread

You're welcome.

...Do you remember when we had just arrived in Tirion and I expressed insecurity related to how young I was and therefore how little time I'd had to learn things?

Permalink Mark Unread

Vividly. Don't worry, it didn't take you long to think of things we hadn't back then and it won't now.

Permalink Mark Unread

I think you've surpassed Kilaiuossa pretty thoroughly in every area possible in the past thirty thousand years.

Permalink Mark Unread

We don't have dreamshaping, I don't think anyone's been playing with its applications.

Permalink Mark Unread

Yeah, that's true.

I'm so, so glad that you're okay. That everyone's okay. I thought--

Permalink Mark Unread

That we were remarkably vivid hallucinations informed by all our public appearances?

Permalink Mark Unread

Well, yes, but before that--before I died--I thought you were all going to fall victim to Morgoth and to Mandos' fucking curse.

Permalink Mark Unread

We thought that too. I guess the Valar are as ineffectual at cursing as at everything else.

Permalink Mark Unread

Yeah.

I love you. I'm really, really glad you got to be King.

Permalink Mark Unread

I love you. I'm really really glad you get to be alive.

Permalink Mark Unread

Yeah. Me too. I'm so lucky--out of all the people who ever died, I get to come back, me and my sister, and--our new family's really great--and--

Permalink Mark Unread

We shall have to study the phenomenon and figure out how - why - whether we can get anyone else -

Permalink Mark Unread

I have no idea how to even start studying it.

Permalink Mark Unread

Nor do I but we only learned of it a few days ago.

Permalink Mark Unread

Yeah.

Thanks for making time to see me without anyone else around.

Permalink Mark Unread

I have thirty thousand years without you to make up for.

Permalink Mark Unread

I can't even really imagine thirty thousand years.

Permalink Mark Unread

I am not sure I can help much, there. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Yeah.

It just--kind of makes it hard to engage with--having been dead that long.

Permalink Mark Unread

You have all the time in the world. You don't have to slip back into place perfectly poised, you can give yourself whatever you need -

Permalink Mark Unread

I know. I just--I'd feel better if I knew what my place was to go back to when I was ready.

Permalink Mark Unread

Do you know what you'd want it to be?

Permalink Mark Unread

 

I don't think I do. I--I don't know anything about anybody that isn't the same as it was thirty thousand years ago or public knowledge or both, and I don't know what's still true or not in the former category if it doesn't happen to be in the second--

Permalink Mark Unread

There's lots of work to be had running the country if that's what you'd want to be doing.

Permalink Mark Unread

No, probably not. Not in the near future, anyway. I want to focus on my studies and my magic for the next while on that level.

...It's not so much what I'm going to do in general that scares me, it's--how well I'll fit back into our family.

Permalink Mark Unread

That I would like you not to worry about. There's been an empty place in our hearts a long time.

Permalink Mark Unread

Okay.

I love you so much.

It's just--the last time--I lost someone--

...It's just sort of hard to--believe I actually get to come home this time...

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Hug.

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Yeah, that.

"'Ve got to figure out resurrection," she mutters. "No one should have to deal with this shit."

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"They were very very motivated."

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"Yeah. But--I was already planning to try, even before--"

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"And you have an edge we don't, with the dreamshaping."

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"Mhm.

I know it's not my fault and silly to say, but--I'm sorry I kept you waiting so long."

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"I'm sorry we didn't fetch you sooner."

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"You didn't know we were alive."

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"I was thinking 'fetch from death' not 'fetch from what sounds like a perfectly nice home life'."

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"Macalaure said you tried."

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"And clearly we were not good enough at it!"

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"We'll figure something out for everyone else."

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I know you will.

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Yeah.

I'm so glad I'm back.

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Us too, trust me.

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I do.

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Hug. Good. Have you said hi to everyone else yet?

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No, not yet, just you and Tyelcormo.

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I bet they'd like to see you.

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Yeah, probably. We just finished unpacking and I wasn't sure who was busy or not so I sort of wandered around until someone said you wanted to see me.

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I don't usually order people into my presence but it seemed like you might not come see me.

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Yeah. Nerves. Thanks.

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Hug.

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Yes. That. Very much that.

Eventually, she says, I should probably let you get back to Kinging for a while and see the others before we turn into a platonic version of Tyelcormo and Idaia.

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You are very welcome to go see the others but I set aside a lot of time for family this week and have no intention of letting Kinging eat any of it back.

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...Oh.

Okay. No hurry, I guess.

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There really, really isn't.

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Mhm.

Wanna meet our new parents?

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I'd love to! 

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Okay! I'm pretty sure I remember the way to our rooms--oh, but you'd know--actually, how much research have you done on my family?

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I got a report that was a page long.

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Without knowing the contents of that page I'm not really sure where to start...

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Ah, I have names and what they do and what aspects of their life are public record and that's approximately all.

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Okay. So Mom's got this sort of subtle dual-nature thing going on--she probably only told Macalaure she's a librarian but if you have public record on her you've also seen that she's a martial artist--and, like, depending on context she alternates between--a librarian who knows martial arts or a martial artist who likes books? Does that make sense?

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I think so.

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Dad cares about people a lot, but he's not really god at figuring out how to help them by himself, so he--finds people who are good at helping people and helps them do that. It's how he and Mom met, actually, the whole librarian thing isn't just organizing books. Mom's mother is very, mm, aggressively human? She's a dancer and a human and she really resents it when people say she must have Elf blood to be as good at it as she is, or otherwise compliment her by comparing her to an Elf, and she is really good at it. When she's in a professional setting she's perfectly capable of being professional as can be but in private she's disdainful of formality on a level I can only compare to Tyelcormo. Mom's father is a librarian too, but he's much more with the rare and old books and much less with the helping people find them.

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Nod. Squeeze. 

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Mom's stepfather is good at predicting when someone is on the tipping point of making a bad life choice and talking them down if someone would seriously get hurt or egging them on if it would be funny and harmless. Mom's sister is kind of like Mom's "martial artist who likes books" side but moreso and with a different fashion sense.

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Nod.

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I don't think grandmother is going to have Opinions about Idaia marrying an Elf but she's probably going to tease her for marrying a prince. Even if it did happen thirty thousand years ago.

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He can be all decidedly not princely at her, if that'll help.

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I'm sure she'll like him. It won't be mean-spirited teasing.

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Should they get the news before the public does?

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Yeah, they were on the list Mom gave Macalaure.

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Then it'll be taken care of already, we contacted all those people this morning.

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Oh good. Grandmother'll probably show up soon, but soon might be measured in weeks, she's on tour right now.

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It's probably a good sign if this doesn't seem urgent enough to cancel it.

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Well, that and the fact that she got good enough at dancing that she has a recurring problem with being compared to Elves by being very, very dedicated to it.

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That also. How old is she?

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Two hundred and thirty-six.

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"Thanks for that, by the way."

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"It was very satisfying."

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"I can imagine. I'm glad we didn't have to worry about it, when we came back."

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"Me too. We could've gotten you anyway, but -"

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"Yeah.

I love you."

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"I love you. I missed you."

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"I'm sorry I didn't make any of half a dozen life choices that would have involved not dying."

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"I'm similarly sorry I didn't make the choices that would've prevented it."

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"It feels really weird to have you apologize to me when I just woke up like the intervening time was nothing and you had to grieve for thirty thousand years."

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"I'm in the habit of being able to assume things are completely under my control, and if they went badly it's my fault."

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"That doesn't sound very healthy."

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"Seems healthy enough to me."

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She's not really convinced but decides that taking it up with Findekano later is probably the more fruitful avenue. "Congratulations on getting married, by the way."

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"Thank you."

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"It explains so much."

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"Oh?"

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"...Less specific discrete things, more just 'oh, this makes so much sense in retrospect.'"

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"Fair enough. Do you have a boyfriend or girlfriend who will be alarmed to be suddenly royalty?"

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"No, I'd've brought 'em up sooner if I did."

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"I appreciate the lack of complications but people tell me it's now much harder to find one."

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"A significant other? That makes sense, I guess, but it's not like I'm in a huge hurry or anything. I'm definitely not ace and I'm pretty sure I'm not aro but I've got all of forever to find someone, and someone I decided to date while convinced that most of my life was an elaborate fantasy isn't necessarily someone I'd want to be with forever anyway."

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"I am very glad you are unconvinced - deconvinced? - that most of your life was an elaborate fantasy."

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"I became convinced it wasn't when Idaia accidentally did magic, it wasn't hard."

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"I'm surprised it took that long to happen."

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"That is weird. I'd look into what might cause it but the relevant research is in another universe and probably thirty thousand years dust."

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"Yeah. Add it to the list of mysteries, I suppose."

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"There are annoyingly many of those but annoyed is better than dead, so."

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"It really is. And someday we'll figure them all out."

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"Yeah, we will. Dunno how, but we've got time to figure it out."

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"We really do."

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"I mean, unless it's like when we thought that in Valinor, but Morgoth is actually dead this time so probably not?"

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"And I know it doesn't feel like it, but it's been thousands of actual uninterrupted Years of peace."

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"Yeah, I know. But it's gonna take some time for the relevant instincts to go away."

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"I bet. You have as long as you need."

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"Yeah. I mean, I want to just be magically uncomplicatedly okay. But that's not how it works."

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"No one's expecting you to be magically uncomplicatedly okay."

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"I want it for myself, not to meet other peoples' expectations. Unsurprisingly not being totally okay is less pleasant than the alternatives."

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"Yes, but feeling like you need to be okay or need to act okay can be even more unpleasant."

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"Yeah. Well. I definitely don't feel the need to act any more okay than I actually am."

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Hug. "Good."

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"I'm significantly more okay than I would be if you hadn't made the world such a lovely place to grow up in."

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"Awww. It was my pleasure, really, very very much."

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"I believe you."

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"Ruling the world is so much fun."

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"As far as I can tell it's a good thing on every possible level that you get to rule the world!"

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"Well, I bet it's inconvenient for someone somewhere who wants to rule the world."

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"They wouldn't do as good a job and can therefore cope."

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"I appreciate your confidence in me."

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"Well, there's no Treelight to put peoples' souls in any more but I think you've adapted marvelously."

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"I keep them all on a magic necklace far away atop a tall mountain."

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She giggles. "I really missed you."

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"I really missed you too."

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"Well. I'm back now."

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"You are! My collection of souls is at long last complete."

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She laughs helplessly and hugs him harder.

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Hugs are good.

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They really are.

"Macalaure told me--how you won. I should probably meet and thank Alcallah at some point or something."

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"You should!"

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"Yeah." Sigh. "Mama--my original one--would have loved to meet her so much."

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Hug. "Maybe someday we'll figure it out."

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"I really hope so."

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"Shall we invite people in here for snacks and the opportunity to catch up with you?"

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"Yeah, okay."

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"No hurry."

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"I'm not feeling horribly socially overstimulated or anything, I'm not fully okay right now but I don't think I'm fragile."

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"All right, I invited people over."

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"Awesome."

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And the rest of the family trickles in.

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She hugs them all. There's more crying.

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Lots more crying.

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"I missed you all so much--Idaia probably already offered belated congratulations on your getting married," she adds to Carnistir.

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"She did."

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"So. That. Yeah.

I missed you all so much."

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"We missed you too."

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"At least you were clear on the fact that I had ever actually existed."

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"Yeah, true. How'd you convince yourself we hadn't?"

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"I don't even remember, I was really little..."

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"I sorta wish you'd said to your parents that it was real and they'd taken you up here to see us and check but then Tyelcormo'd have a really little Idaia and it'd be weird."

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"Yeah, it would've. Part of the problem, though, was that we didn't remember everything all at once. It came back in dreams, which I expect to be magically convenient but wasn't exactly optimized for believability."

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"Yeah, makes sense."

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"I wish I had believed it. I wish I had showed up sooner."

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"Well, we've got you forever now."

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"Yeah.

Really not looking forward to the relevant publicity, though, gotta say."

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"I mean, this is an absolute monarchy, we could do something about the publicity or something."

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"So far the only presented alternative is 'be a secret' and I don't like that either."

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"Break like eight other pieces of news on the same day, distract everyone?"

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"Do we have eight other pieces of news on this scale?

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"We could probably generate them. Without nuking any cities, even."

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"Do I want to know why that's the first way that comes to mind to generate news stories?"

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"I am very good at optimizing within provided criteria?"

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"We don't even have any nuclear weapons, I just pretend we do."

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"I'm not sure I get the point of people thinking we have nukes but okay."

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"Really? It's pretty frequently useful."

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"Do you have to threaten to use them a lot?"

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"Never. But if I didn't have them other people might have the impulse. And this way I can swear that if someone tries something I will use every one I have in retaliation."

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"Ha. Makes sense."

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"Unlikely to come up, world's getting more peaceful over time."

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"Good job."

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"Thank you."

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"You're more than welcome."

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"So what's the plan, sister?"

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"I guess the eight news stories idea sounds good."

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"I agree. Let's brainstorm them. Uh, one of us could be leaving the capitol and founding a new city - Nelyo, you could announce someone's expecting your heir -"

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"No."

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"C'mon, work with me."

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"I mean, that's not totally impossible, artificial insemination exists. My grandmother and grandfather aren't married and my grandfather's gay."

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"I know. I don't want children and do not have anyone I'd ask to bear them."

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"Fair 'nuff."

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"I can't think of much else that'd be a sufficiently big story. We're establishing a Moon colony?"

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"We can do that."

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"Come to think of it, why haven't we already?"

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"I mean, there's not really any need and it's very expensive."

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"...Okay. But you're willing to do it just to draw attention away from us?"

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"I don't have strong reasons not to do it."

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"Okay." More hugs.

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Yeah. And brainstorming big news stories to break.

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Imliss comments where appropriate.

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After a while they have a good collection.

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It is a good collection and they are doing this for her and she missed them so much and now she is crying again.

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Hugs.

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"I'm so glad I get to come home this time."

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"Us too."

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"Yeah.

I should probably meet your spouse and kids at some point."

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"Sure can."

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"What are they like? Besides 'Dwarves and therefore excellent.'"

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"I think you'll just have to meet them."

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"I'm looking forward to it."

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And he has a lot of questions about how they got their memories back.

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She can supply a large number of details about the dreams.

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And they didn't check that they really spoke three extra languages?

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...No.

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He does not comment. The King glares at him just a bit.

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In her defense her grandfather's passion for old books means it would totally have been plausible to have picked up Quenya from him and where exactly was she supposed to find someone who spoke one of the other two.

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He isn't saying anything at all!

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Yes but she knows him.

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Does she.

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She should hope so! She's his sister!

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His very silly sister, not that he's saying that.

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Under the circumstances the correct response to this is hugs.

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Yeah.

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It's so incredibly good to be home.

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He waves at her vaguely when he comes in; they didn't know each other especially well before.

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Yeah. She did spend most of her time in Valinor in Formenos, after all. She acknowledges him but continues hugging people she was close to.

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And he looks at the King's list of distractions and rolls his eyes and suggests some more. 

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She giggles at that and asks Curufin if he wants to hear her progress on Learning All The Things and plans for continuing and recommend things that are in the capital instead of her new hometown.

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He would be happy to do that.

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They can discuss that, then. It's nice.

...Her progress has been a little overachieving even compared to before.

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"Are you one of those people who works harder when unhappy."

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"I thought that even if you guys didn't exist and I was categorically never going to see you again I could make you counterfactually proud of me. So. I was trying to do that."

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Squeeze. 

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Yeah.

"I like the version of reality where you do exist and I can see you again much better."

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"It has a lot to recommend it."

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"Yeah.

I think I would have been less--obtuse about reality--if I didn't still have leftover trauma from my original parents dying telling me that it was Not The Way Things Worked that after something terrible happened I could get back anything I had lost."

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Nod. "You should probably be seeing a therapist or something."

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"That's probably a good idea. I didn't want to--before--because I wasn't confident of finding a therapist who would engage with the dreams as though the things in them had happened, rather than making me--less influenced by them--and. I didn't want to lose you."

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Nod. "But they might've thought of checking the languages."

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"Yeah, that would've been good."

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"Anyway, here you are now."

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"So I am! It's lovely. Therapy will probably also be lovely."

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"What're you planning on doing, do you know?"

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"In general? I don't have any solid plans, besides 'work on dream-based magic and continue learning things.'"

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Nod.

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"If you have any other suggestions I'd be happy to hear them."

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"No, that sounds pretty reasonable."

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"Oh good. I do try to be reasonable. Don't always succeed."

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"Unlike the rest of us, who are reasonable all the time."

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"Gosh, I have missed a lot of character development in the past thirty thousand years."

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"No, you haven't."

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"Yeah, I sorta guessed."

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"Hey, we are eminently responsible rulers of the world."

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"Granted. It was a lovely place to grow up."

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"Good."

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"It's not like I was miserable about thinking you weren't real all the time."

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"Good, that would've been kind of ridiculous."

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"It really would have. I had an overall happy childhood, I promise."

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"I believe you."

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"Good. I--I still miss my original parents, but the new ones are great and it helps."

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"We'll get them back someday."

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"I know. I still miss them."

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"I understand."

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"Mom's going to love Alcallah. Someday."

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"Someday."

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"If you guys can wait thirty thousand years for us I guess I've got a while before I can complain about it taking too long."

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"It'll go by fast."

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"Yeah. We're going to have to start building up magical strength and endurance from scratch, though, that's going to be annoying until we've caught up with where we were."

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"How long do you expect it'll take?"

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"Hopefully not as long as last time, but still probably years."

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"That's pretty short." Teasingly.

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"Hey, I'm still a human who's lived a span of years survivable without magical intervention."

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"I'd totally forgotten!"

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"Right, and Curufin had thirty thousand years of reasonableizing character development."

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"My little sister is so unkind to us."

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"I have thirty thousand years of sibling rivalry to catch up on."

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"Arda quakes in anticipation."

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She laughs and hugs him some more.

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It's good to have her home.

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It's good to be home.

Eventually even reunion-after-seriously-way-too-many-years hugs start to get boring all by themselves and Imliss wants to know who wants to meet her new parents.

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Everybody would love to do that!

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Awesome. The rooms they're staying in were...that way, she thinks...

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He remembers!

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Oh good.

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When her mother opens the door to their rooms, there is a moment's surprise--if that--and then she looks back behind her, and then back to the people outside, and then she says, "I'm not sure these rooms were comfortably intended for this many people. Shall we make do or convene somewhere else?"

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"I have a place in mind that might be more convenient."

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"Where?"

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"Just down the hall."

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"Alright, just let me grab the girls' father," she says, disappearing back briefly into the suite before returning with husband in tow.

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And a more spacious room is found!

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Cool.

"I have to say, this is all--very surreal."

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"I can imagine! Our apologies."

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"You know, if someone had managed to convince me a few decades ago that I would one day have children who were royalty, I would have assumed a significantly higher shenanigans-to-implausible-metaphysics ratio."

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"There are in fact many less-implausible-than-this avenues to becoming royalty!"

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"I know! I would still have assumed shenanigans, though, even if plausible non-shenanigan avenues existed, because, well, shenanigans...happen. A lot."

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"Oh?"

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"Most of the details are private, but--my mother was burned out on the idea of romance by a combination of series of shenanigans and an inadvisable relationship, she met my dads via shenanigan, I met my husband via shenanigan--and, for that matter, I'd call the inexplicable snake with a mirror with a face that brought the girls here in the first place a pretty serious shenanigan. For example."

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"That does seem like an example of a shenanigan."

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"Honestly, once the girls confirmed that the dreams were true I expected contacting you to be heavier on the shenanigans than it ended up being. Hence why Imliss and Inias both greeted your brother with 'oh good Idaia didn't have do do anything newsworthy.'"

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"Idaia just osanwëd me in the middle of a meeting. What was the backup plan?"

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"I don't think she left the house with anything so well-defined as a plan."

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"That does sound like our sister."

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"It seems to generally work for her."

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"In this case it certainly worked fine."

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"Yeah. And would have been a perfectly valid test of the reality of the dreams in the first place, it sounds like--if you hadn't been yourself the range at which she would have been capable of contacting you would have been much shorter, right?"

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"Yes. Though randomly osanwëing the King is frowned upon for very good reason; if she wasn't sure it would have been wise to be well out of range for a stranger."

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"Yes, that was my thought, trying to contact you from a distance sufficient for family but insufficient for a stranger.

I wish I had encouraged them to take the dreams more seriously."

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"I think the consensus is that this worked out better than Tyelcormo fetching Idaia when she was eight or something."

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"Well, there is that."

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"Makes my life much easier!"

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"I'm actually failing to model what this would have looked like."

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"Maybe we should ask Tyelcormo."

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"Could be fun."

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"Or very disconcerting."

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"It's not like it's going to happen. I suppose I don't have enough information to see how it would be disconcerting."

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"Oh, this is just quite a public headache as is and I can vividly imagine the headlines if the girls'd been younger."

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"...Mm, I see your point. And at that age I wouldn't put it past Idaia to physically attack someone who made an accusation like that of someone who mattered to her so much..."

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"Which would be charming but not make my life any easier."

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"Yes.

I still regret the effects I think believing most of their lives to be fictional had on them."

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Nod.

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(Imliss really can't debate this assessment. She can hug someone, though.)

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She can get so many hugs.

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Yeah it's gonna take Anna some time to reconcile "literally the King and his brothers" with "Imliss's family." But seeing how much they care about her helps.

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So he approaches the twins' father. "It's lovely to meet you. Thank you for coming out here on such short notice."

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"...Thank you. It's an honor to meet you. It--seemed the thing to do."

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"I suppose of all the things that could drag one across the country it's one of the pleasanter ones, but still - it's a disruption, and I appreciate your flexibility with it."

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"I was going to be disrupted anyway. This is less annoying than dealing with the media fallout on our own."

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"Your daughter's been conniving to avert it with a deluge of exciting announcements. We might start a Moon colony."

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"Hey, I only approved the plan, it wasn't my idea!"

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"I apologize for inappropriately crediting you with a Moon colony!"

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She makes a face best described as, "oh, right, no one can win an argument with Maitimo."

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He makes a face back best described as 'that's right, they don't, beloved sister.'

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She sticks her tongue out at him and then promptly hugs someone else in such a way that she can't see any faces he makes back.

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That's a shame because he's smiling adoringly at the back of her head.

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Inias laughs softly.

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And everyone has a lovely reunion.

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Very much so.

"Do you know when the miscellaneous news stories are going out?"

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"Next couple days."

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"Okay. Um, is there anything I should avoid doing in that time so it doesn't break prematurely?"

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"All handled, don't worry."

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"Okay, good.

...I wonder how people are going to take everything."

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"Probably with endless gossip and children everywhere dreaming they'll remember they're a princess."

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"...Yeah. Although, I mean, people did know Idaia had to exist, even if they knew literally nothing about her besides that your brother had a dead wife..."

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"True, but there are other ancient Elves with dead mortal spouses."

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"Yeah, true. ...We don't actually know what happened to us or why or whether it could happen again."

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"We don't. I will not assume that everyone clambering to prove themselves a dead Elf-spouse is a faker."

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"Idaia said that Tyelcormo said that he'd wished there had been more information available about us so we were better able to confirm the dreams."

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"On the other hand, that'd rather enable Elf-spouse fakers."

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"It's a bit of a conundrum, yeah."

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"Knowledge of you two should prompt others to come forward."

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"Yeah. ...Probably Tyelcormo could have told that Idaia was alive if he had checked, right?"

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"Probably. I can suggest people check but - it'd be painful."

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"They wouldn't have to check more than once every few decades, but yeah."

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Nod. "It will probably occur to people without anyone suggesting it."

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"Yeah.

And even if Idaia and I are special snowflakes maybe we can fix that."

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"Indeed."

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"I hope so. ...It would probably have unwanted social consequences to dramatically prioritize dead human spouses of ancient Elves."

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"I am not planning to do that if we figure out how to do it, no."

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"Yeah. I can't help but feel sorry for the Elves involved though."

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"They've waited a long time, they can wait a lot longer if they know it'll eventually work."

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"True."

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"I don't think even thirty thousand years would have hurt Tyelcormo that badly if he'd known it wasn't forever."

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"...So don't tell people I might be able to until I have a better idea of whether or not I actually even theoretically could, or not that?"

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"I'm sure they'll be wondering whether or not we say anything."

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"If they're already wondering I'm honestly not sure I meaningfully have an answer."

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"I wasn't expecting one from you. Don't worry about it."

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"I'll try."

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"No, no, dear, that was a royal order. I insist. Insistently."

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"It's so cute how you think emotions respond to logic and/or royal orders."

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"Should I deploy terrifying magic to achieve compliance with my royal orders?"

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"That sounds like a really great way to get people to start lying to you."

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"Ah, but sister, I can tell."

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"Then it sounds like a really good way to get people to avoid you."

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"Well, I can't have that."

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"Indeed," she nods sagely, and then hugs him.

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Hugs are good.

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What if I can't do it?

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Then we'll find a different way.

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Okay. Good.

I hope it doesn't take another thirty thousand years.

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Me too, but we have 'em.

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This is true!

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We have forever!

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When I'm thinking about it in--a Zavari Lessnerai frame of mind instead of a Fell one, if that makes sense--I vacillate between 'yay I'm alive' and retroactive dodged-a-bullet terror at how incredibly easy it would be for things to be any way other than this.

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Nod. Lot of people feel that way thinking about the war.

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Even after all this time?

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It really hasn't felt like that long.

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It's been thirty thousand years.

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I know that! I lived them!

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That's like an order of magnitude longer than you'd been alive when we died! Not accounting for Valian time weirdness!

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I know.

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So how could it feel like not long?

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I'm not really sure. It did, though, for everyone but Tyelcormo.

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Poor Tyelcormo.

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Yeah.

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At least it's over now.

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Yep.

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The way he looked when I was talking to Idaia...he didn't look miserable, but...

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Formerly miserable.

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Like being miserable had damaged his ability to have a life outside of Idaia.

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Probably, yes.

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I hope he gets better from that. Eventually. For both their sakes.

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I am sure he will, eventually.

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Yeah.

Thirty thousand years...

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He didn't spend all of them mourning, he helped win the war.

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How long did that actually take, Macalaure didn't say.

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Four hundred years.

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Wow.

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You imagining longer or shorter?

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I'm honestly not even sure.

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It was more than long enough.

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I can hardly even imagine.

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Angband was pretty terrible.

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I don't actually know much about it besides that it was considered a good thing in its own right to test the mind-control fungus on the orcs by making them kill all the prisoners.

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Yeah. Definitely.

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I wish I could have helped.

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We wished you were around too.

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I know it's kind of ridiculous to apologize for dying, but--I made decisions that led to it, and--mathematically speaking, if I was one-thirtieth at fault that's on average a thousand years of absence to be sorry for...

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No feeling guilty. Royal order.

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I love you so much.

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I love you too. I missed you.

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Don't have to anymore.

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Yep. Might take a while to get out of the habit.

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A while on an Elf scale or a human scale?

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Elf scale, probably.

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That'll be interesting to get used to.

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Country mostly isn't run that way.

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I meant the missing, not the time scale.

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I shall not dramatically mope.

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I doubt you did that terribly much while we were actually dead.

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Are you questioning my dramatic moping abilities?

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Not your abilities, your inclinations.

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You're right, I'm a very subtle moper.

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Yeah.

It's not really surprising. After thirty thousand years of building a habit it's not going to disappear overnight.

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Please don't worry about us.

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I'm not entirely sure I'm going to be able to refrain from worrying about Tyelcormo at least a little until he stops acting so...that...about Idaia.

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Do you think it'll be hard on her?

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...Depends on what you mean by that. I think there's an extent to which she considers it her responsibility to humor that mood for as long as it lasts.

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And is that going to harm her?

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I don't...think so? I don't think you could plausibly get her to stop in a way that wasn't worse than what you were stopping--I think she's going to be unhappy that he was in pain for a long time because of her, I think there are going to be times when she wants to do something not compatible with humoring him and repress the desire...

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I'll trust your judgment.

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If she does worse than I expect or I see something that could be done to help I'll let you know.

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Thanks.

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Of course.

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And everybody meets or reunites with their lost in-laws.

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And eventually the humans need to do human things like eat and sleep.

The next day she seeks him out of her own accord without having to have a servant sent to prod her.

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"Hello!"

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"Hi! ...I'm not sure if I should move into the new house with my parents or stay in the palace."

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"We'd love to have you, but probably depends what you want to be doing."

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"I've mostly been figuring that whatever I wanted to do could be done from either location. Points on the palace side include improved ability to remind you that I'm not dead and therefore break the missing-me habit faster, more convenient reporter-avoidance, better access to Idaia, and the fact that living in my parents' house could emphasize the 'biologically seventeen' aspect of our nature, which could be inconvenient for Idaia and Tyelcormo. Points on the house side include the fact that they've had a lot dumped on them pretty fast and having me around more often could help them deal with that better."

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"House and secret passage to the palace?"

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"You know, I wouldn't have predicted that the secret dungeons would be good practice for problem-solving, but..."

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"I would have predicted that! Because I'm brilliant!"

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"Yes you are. How long would it take to construct such a secret passage?"

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"Are you assuming I don't already have arbitrary secret passages?"

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"Did I give a domain of possible t-values excluding zero or negative numbers?"

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"You can have a secret passage tomorrow, dear sister."

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"You're fantastic. Thank you."

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"My pleasure."

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"I know. That's why you're fantastic."

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"I missed having a flattering little sister."

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"I missed having a brother skilled at cutting through problems like they weren't there."

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"I hear it's useful."

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She hugs him. She is maybe trembling slightly.

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Hug.