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after summer is winter, after winter summer
whately twins land on valdemar
Permalink Mark Unread

Cultists are, in Lucy's admittedly limited experience, never a good thing. 

For one thing, they're almost always worshipping something that she's pretty sure doesn't care, and for another, they're almost always planning to do something stupid about it. 

Normally this would be neatly solvable by simply avoiding them; Lucy's pretty excited about the whole idea of being able to safely interact with people now, but that doesn't mean she wants to interact with the really inadvisable ones. Occasionally, however, they will be up to something really stupid and require interference. 

She's pretty sure they successfully interfered. Wherever the hell they are now, she doesn't think what the cultists were trying to do was send them there. 

Permalink Mark Unread

They're surrounded by trees. 

The trees are...not normal trees. They're twisty and odd-shaped and look like something out of a modern art painting that's trying a bit too hard to be edgy, and some of them have vines covering the trunks that look a bit more mobile than vines really ought to be. It's dim in the shadow of the leaves and something feels wrong.

In the distance, something rustles in the underbrush. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Her attention snaps in that direction, and she listens intently for a repeat of the noise. Does it sound like a person?

Permalink Mark Unread

Not particularly – it has the sort-of-randomness nature of an animal moving, and then the noise stops. Unclear if it's because the maker of the noise stopped moving, or is just moving more stealthily. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Good. She tears her dress off and--

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--changes, running in the direction of the sound. 

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In which case she's going to run straight into the source of the earlier sound. 

The creature looks sort of like a cross between a snake and a greyhound. Soot-black skin, swallowing the dim light, but still giving the impression of scales rather than fur. Its neck is too long and its arrowhead-shaped head is wrong and its yellow pupil-less eyes are glowing, it lunges at her with its long narrow muzzle opening to show rows of needle-sharp, thumb-length teeth–

Permalink Mark Unread

--and since it can't actually see her, there is nothing to stop it from lunging straight into her open mouth, which slams shut with a crunch. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Several more of the creatures start to appear from the undergrowth and then slink back into unseen positions. They seem to be smart enough to notice that whatever just happened to their compatriot, it could happen to them as well. 

Permalink Mark Unread

You know what else can happen to them? Invisible tentacles. 

She assumes that they work on a sufficiently non-eldritch body plan that snapping their necks kills them. 

Permalink Mark Unread

They're pretty defenceless against invisible tentacles, though a few of them do start to react despite having no way of seeing her – but not fast enough. Snapping their necks does, in fact, work very effectively to kill them. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Awesome. 

Once all of them are dead or fled, she picks up all the dead ones and carries them back to Wilbur.

Permalink Mark Unread

"...What are these?" 

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"Dunno," she says, changing back to her smaller shape once the creatures are in a reasonable pile and pulling on her dress. "They don't taste great, but they're made of meat and they're not people. --I guess I don't know that for sure but they don't have clothes or paint or anything and they were acting like pack predators, not like a tribe, there's not really any reason to think they would be. Anyway, we can't afford to be picky." 

Permalink Mark Unread

"You're not wrong," he sighs, and tears a leg off one of the creatures and starts munching it. Doesn't taste great. Oh well. He starts looking around for wood that would make good kindling. 

Permalink Mark Unread

It's a little harder than expected, because some of the things that look like dead branches on the ground try to attack him when he reaches for them, or run away, but if he's persistent then he'll eventually be able to gather a reasonable pile of wood, both kindling and larger pieces. 

Permalink Mark Unread

He acquires any scratches from things in the attacking category and is muttering under his breath by the time he has a reasonable campfire setup. With rocks placed around the outside for fire safety. Do any rocklike things attack him. 

Permalink Mark Unread

These particular rocks, at least, seem inert. Something insect-like but considerably larger than any reason insect bursts out from under a disturbed rock at one point and goes for his face. There are also some creepy white wormlike things with mouths that open and sing in children's voices, but they otherwise leave him alone. 

Permalink Mark Unread

He falls backwards in startlement when the insect-thing comes at him and hits it out of the air, then squashes it. 

...He's...going to reciprocate the leaving-alone...voices like that should not emerge from worms. 

Once the campfire is appropriately guarded from stray sparks he takes out his flint and steel and attempts to get a fire going. 

Permalink Mark Unread

He's going to need particularly flammable tinder, the branches won't catch from a spark, but one of them has papery bark that can be peeled off and ought to do the trick.

Permalink Mark Unread

Papery bark! Papery is a good adjective for tinder to have. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Once the fire is going, Lucy holds the dead creature Wilbur tore a leg off in the fire. Maybe it will taste better cooked. 

Permalink Mark Unread

It does not, in fact, particularly taste better cooked. 

However, there are some fat-looking birds rustling around in the tree above them which might be more palatable? 

Permalink Mark Unread

 

Surprise tentacle yoink?

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Yoinked! 

The bird has disconcerting rows of teeth inside its beak, and its claws have opposable thumbs, but it does not show any indication of being sentient and, while a lot of the apparent plumpness is feathers, it does have a decent amount of flesh in there. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Neat. She snaps its neck cleanly, pulls the feathers off, and roasts it. 

While it's roasting she inspects the feathers. 

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The feathers change colour to match whatever surface they're on, but this stops happening within a few minutes and they settle on a neutral sort of grey-brown. 

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Aw. Oh well. 

When the bird is done cooking she tears off a drumstick, hands the rest to Wilbur, and takes a crunchy bite out of the drumstick, bone and all 

Permalink Mark Unread

It tastes weird but not bad, per se. There are probably more of them around in the trees, if either of them is still hungry. 

Permalink Mark Unread

She ate like a whole herd of wild boar before they found the cultists or she'd've eaten all the predator-creatures straight off. 

Permalink Mark Unread

And between a leg of predator-creature and all-but-a-drumstick of bird Wilbur is good for now, being much much smaller than his sister. 

Wilbur settles down to watch the fire. 

Permalink Mark Unread

While Lucy, who is much more difficult to hurt, takes off to do some scouting and see what if anything she can find out about this place they've been sent. 

Permalink Mark Unread

It does not get less creepy on further exploration. Hanging from a very large old-looking tree are vines that open worm-like mouths and try to eat her (without much success). At one point she runs into a creature sort of like a lion, but larger and with unnaturally long teeth. It looks at her from the top of a rock, seems to decide she's not worth bothering, and then turns partially invisible and creeps away. 

Permalink Mark Unread

That is definitely a good choice for the lion. 

What's the highest up she can get? 

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The rock is pretty tall, but her best bet is probably going to be one of the trees. The really tall ones don't have any branches until thirty feet up, though. 

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This is a problem she is capable of solving with tentacles. 

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Then, if she can reach the very top of the tree, she'll see a forest that stretches out for quite a ways on either side, rolling hills of it with occasional breaks where trees have fallen. There isn't that much light left but the dying sunset comes from what's presumably the west. In the opposite direction, there's eventually a shadowy break in the trees that might be a river. Even further that way, the horizon might be something other than forest, but really it's getting too dark to tell.

Permalink Mark Unread

Hmm. 

She returns to her brother and reports on what she's found. He has to sleep almost like a human, so he turns in not long after sunset. Lucy pulls a book out of the bookbag she had been carrying when they ran into the cultists and left with her brother while she did things like "kill bizarre back hunters" and "go exploring" and reads by firelight, keeping an ear open for anything that might want to disturb them in the night. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Some unfortunate bearlike creature does emerge and try to take her down with its claws about an hour before dawn; other than that the night is uneventful. 

Permalink Mark Unread

So unfortunate for the bearlike creature. How does it taste? 

Permalink Mark Unread

Pretty good, actually! It's got lots of meat and fat on its bones, and the meat tastes almost normal. The bearlike creature does have feathers mixed in with its fur, which is a bit weird, but eh. 

Permalink Mark Unread

What are these feathers like?

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They're large and sturdy, a dull colour that blends with the fur, but come off surprisingly easily, and turn out to have sharp barbed bases; it looks suspiciously like perhaps the bear-creature can fling them if provoked. They don't do anything problematic to her now that it's dead, though. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Ha, neat. She collects these feathers as well and before long has the hide off the bear and the bear divided into several sections, each small enough to cook on their little campfire.

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Wilbur wakes to the scent of roasting meat and the sight of his sister contently sucking blood off her tentacles.

"Goodmorning. I see we received visitors in the night."

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"Just the one. It was this huge bear."

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"Same difference." Om nom bear breakfast.

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Some sort of foxlike creature with a long tongue that has teeth on the end tries to steal some of the meat fast enough that they don't notice, but other than that they're left unmolested. 

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Lucy notices the foxalike but not soon enough that it's worth the effort to chase it. 

She sets up a crude frame for curing the bear hide on and, after a moment's reflection, checks to see if the pack-things have hides that ought to be worth saving.

Permalink Mark Unread

The hides have a somewhat disgusting rubbery texture under the scales, and half a day later they're starting to really stink. 

Permalink Mark Unread

That'd be a no, then. 

She disrobes and turns into her large form and eats another few. She can't exactly get food poisoning, after all.

Assuming nothing unexpected happens, the two of them will spend the rest of the day working on the bear skin, trying to work out some kind of primitive shelter, ideally portable, and fending off further wild animal attacks.

Permalink Mark Unread

The day is uneventful; there are a few more animal attacks, but then quiet, maybe the local wildlife is learning. 

Towards the evening, though, an awful smell starts to drift in on the wind. It's not coming from the remaining dead snake-greyhound-things. 

Permalink Mark Unread

...Yeah she is going to go investigate that. In Large And Invisible mode.

Permalink Mark Unread

A few hundred yards away, slowly lumbering through the undergrowth, she'll find an incredibly hideous animal. It's the colour of vomit, its toadlike face jammed without the junction of a neck onto a lizard-body, with a dull frill running unevenly down its spine. Its open mouth, full of half-rotted teeth, continually leaks greenish slime which leaves a glistening trail on the ground. 

It blinks stupidly at her. Smelling like something that died several months ago and has been sitting in the sun that entire time. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Great. 

Those half-rotted teeth are definitely not herbivore teeth. She doesn't suppose if she sort of tries to gently shoo it it will shoo.

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It walks at her. Slowly. Still blinking stupidly and tilting its wide ugly head to one side, then the other. It looks confused. And like it's not especially planning to stop, and probably wants to eat her. (Good luck). 

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Well, She Tried. 

She bites its head off. It probably tastes even worse than the pack-hunters but fortunately she is not a kind of thing that throws up. 

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...It tastes a level of bad that it's sort of hard to believe exists, and the body keeps sort of incompetently trying to walk for a while before it finally keels over, but it does, eventually, seem to be properly dead. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Wow this tastes gross. She makes herself swallow it anyway. She will not kill something and then just let it go to waste

She can still only make herself take another couple of bites from various places on the creature's body (in case any part of it tastes less vile than the rest) before deciding that really, she doesn't have to eat the whole thing now. 

She also pries a handful of bones from various places she bit through, mostly a handful of ribs and some vertebrae. Just because she isn't letting it go to waste doesn't mean she needs to eat the whole thing, and bone is useful for stuff. 

She takes her prizes and then hurries off to the campsite to chase the taste out of her mouth with roast bear. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Meanwhile, still half a mile distant, a party of six (well, four people, taking turns walking versus riding double on the two sentient magic horses) is slowly following the basilisk's trail. 

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A tall slender man with long white hair, wearing robes that blend in with the foliage, is walking ahead right now, and freezes dead. "What." Pause. "Moondance. Everyone. Come see this." 

Permalink Mark Unread

"This" is an extremely dismembered basilisk corpse. 

The head is missing entirely; there are what could plausibly be enormous toothmarks defining the edge of the stump. Even more obvious are the enormous yet unmistakable bites gouged out of various locations on the creature's body. The one on the side of the creature's torso and the one on the creature's hind leg are especially messy, as though someone or something had reached in and yanked the bones out. 

Permalink Mark Unread

"...Gods, and I thought they smelled bad on the outside." A white-haired woman slips down from the white stallion she's riding, and attempts to cover her mouth and nose with her sleeve. "Gah. Van, ke'chara, maybe don't come any closer. Let's try to at least get upwind, shall we?" 

Permalink Mark Unread

"...Look, everyone," a younger man who also has waist-length white hair points out. "There's a trail that keeps going." It...doesn't look like the basilisk's trail. It looks like it was made by something a hell of a lot bigger. "Um, should we..." 

Permalink Mark Unread

It takes the group a while to decide whether it's safe to follow, but they eventually do, carefully and while working in concert to hold a shield of magical energies all around them. 

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What they eventually find is a campsite. 

The contents of the campsite are: 

1) A campfire 

2) Some kind of makeshift tent composed of basilisk ribs and bearhide 

3) A small pile of dead wyrsa 

4) A young woman with the locally-ubiquitous elsewhere-uncommon white hair, holding a single basilisk vertebra. As they watch, she brings it to her mouth, and shaves off a curling fragment against her teeth. She makes a pleased noise and adds it to a string of feathers and other such curls. 

She doesn't seem to have noticed them. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Freeze. Orient. A silent conversation happens via shielded Mindspeech.

Starwind, as the most experienced combat mage, reaches out very cautiously to probe the area – and the woman in particular – with his mage-senses, while all four of them ready themselves for an instantaneous response. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Well, she is magic. Not a kind of magic he would have ever seen before, though. There is at least one other source of her weird magic, though, inside the tent. 

Her magic is deeply weird. It doesn't operate along any kind of channel, like human Gifts do. She simply is it, as much as she is flesh and blood. Possibly more. 

Permalink Mark Unread

When she doesn't respond, there's another brief Mindspeech conference, and then Starwind steps forward, while the other three hang back and ready every shield they can bear to fling over him if needed. 

He clears his throat.

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She startles, dropping the end of the string with the needle attached to it that she had been using to add another feather. She sees him, pales, looks down at the tooth-scraped vertebra, tries to hide it behind her, realizes this is a stupid idea and puts it down where it had been again. She stands up and dusts off her dress and says something in a completely unfamiliar language and nervous tone of voice. 

Permalink Mark Unread

"I apologize, but I cannot understand you," Starwind says in Tayledras. She looks foreign. What kind of foreign is hard to tell. 

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He glances at Savil, who steps forward and starts attempting basic greetings in every single tongue she can think of. She's only fluent in four languages but she's got the "basic greetings" part down for over a dozen. 

Permalink Mark Unread

Why do these people also have white hair???

She shakes her head apologetically. Can't understand a one. Not surprising, she only speaks English and some Aklo, and if these people spoke Aklo she would have different questions. 

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Eventually Savil, very tentatively, lifts a hand to warn her that something is about to happen and then tries reaching out with a Mindtouch. :Hello?:

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:Hi???:

Her mental "voice" is strange, like someone shouting from above water to someone underneath it. It is, though--if perhaps only barely--intelligible. 

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Savil grins, partly from pride at establishing sort-of-communication and partly just from relief and suppressed nerves, communication happened and the response wasn't hostile! 

Mindspeech isn't actually language-independent, unfortunately – a concept like 'hello' is easy to convey, more complex concepts are harder without shared words – but it's a hell of a lot better than shouting spoken words at the stranger. 

:I am sorry to interrupt: she sends. (Always a good idea to be polite, to a stranger who might have a beast at her beck and call that just ate a basilisk.) :We were following the basilisk's trail. Do you...know anything...about that?: She gestures vaguely back in the direction they came.

Permalink Mark Unread

She debates internally before deciding that given what they've already seen and all the white hair and everything she's not going to get away with pretending to be a normal girl. 

:It was a carnivore and it was headed towards our campsite. I tried to shoo it but that didn't work. So I killed it. I wasn't gonna just leave it to rot! I could only stomach so much at a time, it tasted awful, but I was gonna come back. I eat what I kill.:

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Savil squints, it's effortful to grab onto the gist when she has to dig at concepts instead of shared words and there's the weird underwater effect, but she can follow. Well, aside from the part where that's completely insane and impossible and surely the simplest explanation is a failure of translation. 

:Basilisks are nearly impossible to kill: she sends. :Resistant to magic–: and then she breaks off, because the girl might look human but she really obviously isn't. :What, er, species are you?: 

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:I'm, um, half human. The kind of thing my father is can't fully exist within the kind of reality humans live in. Please don't try to kill me.:

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Leave aside the really confusing aside. Savil lifts both hands. :Of course I'm not going to kill you. I have no intent to harm you. Simply questions: Some sort of bizarre halfbreed with...something extraplanar? ...doesn't actually make sense but it's not any less believable or bizarre than 'dead basilisk with bites taken out.

:How did you come here?: she sends. :You are in Tayledras territory: 

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:We ran into some cultists and they sent us here. I don't know what Tayledras means but everything is so weird here, there are worms that sing really disturbingly and vines that try to bite and the predators taste so bad. Well, the pack-things and the basilisk do. The bear was fine. People are usually scared of me when they know what I am and people respond to fear with violence a lot. I'm good at not dying and at running away but I hate when people look at me like that...:

Permalink Mark Unread

The fourth two-legged person in their party, a much younger dark-haired teen boy, has been hovering back with one hand on his white mare's neck. At this, though, he creeps forward. 

:Savil: he sends, privately. :We aren't going to hurt her, right?:

The strange girl is...honestly pretty terrifying, or at least should be, but Vanyel is not always good at being scared of the things that he ought to be scared of. (He's scared of plenty of other things instead). And 'people are usually scared of me when they know what I am' makes his chest clench. 

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:I hope not: Savil sends back, privately as well, before returning to the girl.

:We have no violent intent: she sends. Cultists...sent them here...? A Gate, perhaps? But any of the four mages would have sensed it, gods, Vanyel would have felt a Gate from fifty miles off, and their camp doesn't look like they've been here long. There are an awful lot of pieces of this situation that make no sense. Anyway, if the girl is some half-human hybrid with an extraplanar entity – which might explain her incredibly weird magical aura and Mindspeech – then that isn't her fault. And she doesn't seem inclined to violence at this point. Self-defence, sure. 

If I could've eaten a basilisk the first time one came at me, I'd have done it too, she thinks. It's unfortunate, the Tayledras try not to kill the ugly bastards because they're in fact pretty key to the ecosystem, but a stranger Gated or otherwise dumped here by enemies wouldn't have known that. 

:My name is Savil: she sends. :This is Vanyel, and the other two are Starwind and Moondance. We are on our way out of the Pelagirs, to, er, a less weird land. If you would like to accompany us, this isn't a particularly good place for you to be for various reasons: 

Permalink Mark Unread

:I would love to be not here. We were going to look for civilization once we had our bearings a little better anyway. Oh, but I should finish the pack-things and the basilisk first, it would be bad to leave them uneaten and they'd be hard to transport. Especially with normal people who feel a normal amount of revolted by horrible smells.:

Permalink Mark Unread

Savil gets a slightly nauseated look, which she tries to hide. :Er, yes. Actually, basilisks are among the only creatures that eat dead wyrsa, they're...pretty toxic...good idea not to leave them lying around...: If the girl being the spawn of some extraplanar horror means she can eat godforsaken wyrsa corpses, might as well make use of that fact. 

:Also - we? Do you have a travel companion?: There is the same weird magic sensed inside the tent, but it's weird enough that Savil can't tell if it's a person or just some sort of artifact, and she hasn't tried to Look deeper. Probing too obviously seems discourteous and that seems ill-advised, right now. 

Permalink Mark Unread

:Um--yes. My brother. He's more human than I am mostly so he has to sleep most nights. Uh, but he doesn't look more human than me right now because I can shapeshift and he can't. He looks a lot more human than the shape I killed the basilisk with.:

Permalink Mark Unread

:You can shapeshift?: Savil manages to keep most of the shock out of her mindvoice. :And, of course, your brother is welcome to travel with us as well: She thinks she's slightly getting the hang of the girl's strange Mindspeech – it's still a struggle to catch everything, what with the language barrier, but if she concentrates hard she gets most of it. 

:We ought to teach you the local language while we travel: she adds as an afterthought. :Most people in the land we're headed to can't talk this way: 

Permalink Mark Unread

:That would be good. People are even more scared of things they can't talk to. And yes, I can't leave bite marks that big with this mouth.:

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Vanyel, still hovering behind Savil, chokes down a laugh. Not actually funny, he tells himself firmly.

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:We can wait as long as you need to pack up: Savil sends. :Oh – what are your names?: 

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:I'm Lucy and he's Wilbur. Um, I can carry more in the other shape, we've got this bearhide and these bones, I could probably take the other bones out of the basilisk first, they're not vile when you char the flesh off and then there's less to eat...does anyone have a use for super-tough bone?:

Permalink Mark Unread

The younger of the robed white-haired men steps back out into the clearing; it seems like there's no danger here after all. :I must say, I have never considered whether basilisk bone had a use. Likely, yes: 

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:You can have it if you want, I woulda found a use for it but as long as someone's using it it's fine.:

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:Er, do you have a policy of using every part of something you kill?: Vanyel sends, curiously, before he can stop himself.

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:I have a policy of eating everything I don't use. Back home there are people who kill stuff just for sport and take home enough to make a trophy and leave the rest to rot. It's bad. Animals aren't like people but they still suffer and die and I hate it when things die pointlessly.:

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Vanyel blinks hard. That's...really sweet, actually...and it's stupid that it makes him want to burst into tears. 

:That's good of you: he manages finally. :It is bad when things die pointlessly: 

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:Yeah. So I'll eat the wyrsa and then I'll debone the basilisk and--actually is there any other part of the basilisk that could be useful besides just the bones? The hide seemed pretty tough...:

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Moondance scrunches up his face. :It seems harder to remove the odour, but indeed, it may be of use. We might as well try keeping it: 

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:I'd try scrubbing it but I only vaguely know where a river is and I'd rather not scrub it in a river anyway, think what that would do to the poor fish. I can always eat it later if destinking it doesn't work I guess...um, I have to take my clothes off to change shape if I don't want them ruined. Could the boys turn around please?:

Permalink Mark Unread

Vanyel turns pink and quickly turns his back. The others follow suite.

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Including Savil, not that she's at all bothered by nudity, she spends a lot of time in k'Treva Vale after all, but she's concerned that she'll yelp or look grossed out by the transformation if it catches her off guard and she doesn't want to be rude. 

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:Okay, I'm done! And, um, invisible, I forgot to mention that part. It just works that way. But I can pick stuff up to give a sort of broad outline of where I am?:

She picks up all her feathers and some sticks and rocks and stuff and holds them close to her body. She's...big. Very big. Literally-outgrew-her-house-when-she-was-sixteen-and-that-was-two-years-ago-now big. About the size of a barn, but much rounder. 

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Goodness. Savil...does not swear out loud or in Mindspeech, though behind her shields a creative stream of curse-words is happening. 

:That works: she sends, calmly. :We...ought to be able to avoid bumping you, if we give you some, er, personal space: How is she holding all of those things at once, that would take more than a reasonable number of hands. Savil doesn't ask. It might be rude. :And your brother?: she sends instead. 

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:Um, he's not as strong as me so he can't help much with the basilisk. But I can wake him up if you want to explain things while I do that.: One by one, the wyrsa raise into the air and then disappear into the area demarcated by feathers and sticks and rocks. In between there are chewing and crunching noises. :As long as he has all this clothes and his coat on he mostly looks like a human but bigger.:

Permalink Mark Unread

:Er, if he needs more rest that's fine, we're not in a huge hurry or anything:

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:He has to sleep sometime but he doesn't need quite as much sleep as a normal human so I wouldn't for no reason but if there's a reason it should probably be okay.:

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Savil thinks for a moment. :Hmm. There's a more secure place to camp: very convenient that Starwind and Moondance know the area so well, :but it's far enough that to reach it before dark we ought to leave soon. Er, unless the two of you can move much faster than a human on foot: She had been assuming their new travel companions would slow them down. Actually that's not at all obvious. 

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:I can! And I can carry him.:

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:Ah. And we can travel quickly if the Companions carry us double. It's no hurry, then. We can either depart later or make an early camp tonight: 

She's still trying to contain the general overwhelming level of confusion.

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:I hafta eat the rest of the basilisk but I could run back here from a farther-off campsite while everyone else is asleep,: Lucy muses. 

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:...I would prefer to leave here sooner rather than later: Savil admits. :The smell here is, er, rather distressing: 

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:Okay.: 

The bearskin of the makeshift tent rustles as she reaches in to shake her brother awake.

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"Hnnn...?"

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"Some people found us and they caught me doing not-human stuff and they know what I am but they're not scared or violent and they said they'd take us to civilization but they're moving farther tonight so we're moving now." 

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"Oh. Alright." 

He crawls out of the tent and stands up. 

His most notable feature is the fact that upright, he stands about ten feet tall. 

Much, much less obvious, but still apparent if you know what to look for, is the fact that even under the concealing drape of his long, bulky overcoat, his legs don't move quite right. 

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Lucy quickly gathers her feathers and their books and stuffs the books back in the book bag and wraps it and the feathers in the bearskin and then with a different set of tentacles picks up the bones. Her brother she places on top of herself so that he can grip the bases of some tentacles and ride instead of just being carried. 

:Ready!:

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It's all a pretty disconcerting sight, but Savil's seen a lot in her forty-ish years as a Herald, she can keep her face impassive. :All right, let's go: She mounts her Companion, lets Starwind hop up behind her, while Vanyel and Moondance get up on Yfandes. :Er, if you've got questions, you can ask them along the way: 

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:How come you three have white hair? I do 'cause I wanted to look like Mom and she was an albino.:

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Interesting. :I assumed yours was white from magic: Savil sends. :That's the reason for us – mages who use node-energy go white in a few years. Vanyel here is a mage as well but he's new at it so it hasn't happened yet: 

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:No. I know some magic and I guess what I am is probably magic and admittedly my teacher's hair is also white but my hair's because of my mother and hers was white all her life and my teacher's was too I think. I guess I didn't ask. Grandfather's hair was white but I think that's just 'cause he was old. Wilbur's hair isn't white though.:

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:So you can make your hair whatever color you want?: Vanyel interjects. :That's neat:  He seems to be warming up to the two new people, and is noticeably less tense. 

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:Um, not now, not exactly. I mean, I could, but--not casually. I was born with this big form--I mean I wasn't this big when I was born, I was baby-sized when I was born, but I was this same shape--and I made my smaller shape, and I can go between the two, and I can mix them a little, but I'd have to make a whole new shape to make my hair a different color. And it'd take a while. And I don't need another human shape as much as I needed the one.:

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:Oh. I see: He's not at all sure that he does. 

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:So where are the two of you from originally?: Savil sends. 

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:Dunwich, Massachusetts.:

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:I haven't heard of anywhere called that: Savil admits. :The place we're going is called Valdemar – have you heard of it?:

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:No. But our education wasn't normal. We couldn't go to normal school 'cause we grew so fast and people couldn't know I existed, so Mom and Grandfather taught us, but they didn't have that many books, and the books they did have, a lot of them were about magic and other things most people don't know. So probably there's lots of places we haven't heard of.:

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:That sounds stressful: Vanyel sends. :That people couldn't know you existed: Although maybe that isn't a topic she wants to talk about and it's rude to bring up and he should change the subject – that's probably how he would feel about it. :Er, can you do magic then? Aside from the shapeshifting, I mean: 

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:Oh! Yeah. I learned some from the books and then when we left home and I learned to turn human-shaped we met someone else who knew about those kinds of things, and he was just human but he knew a lot of magic, and he taught us. Magic mostly but also mundane medicine. For humans. We don't get sick and it's good because no one would know how to treat us.:

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:That would be awkward: Savil agrees, keeping her poise even though all of this is weird weird weird. :What sort of mundane medicine? Most of our medicine is magical, except for herbs and things:

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:Well, there's herbs,: she agrees, :and how to disinfect a wound, and how to do surgery if the situation is bad enough to warrant it and how to tell if it is. And blood transfusions, and how to breathe into someone's mouth if their lungs have stopped, and how to set broken limbs, and what shock is and how to treat it, and how you hafta be careful when you're warming up someone who's got hypothermia because if you raise their temperature too fast it can do more damage.:

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Savil is blinking faster and faster trying to keep up. :Whoa: she sends finally. 

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Moondance sticks his head out from behind Vanyel, who he's holding onto to stay on Yfandes back. :What, exactly, is a 'blood transfusion'? I am a Healer myself and I have never heard of that: 

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:So! People--human people, I mean--have blood that comes in different kinds. And if somebody has lost a lot of blood, then you can take blood out of someone healthy who has the same kind, and put it in them. If it's a different kind it can just make things worse.:

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He looks amazed. :Can you really? How do you take the blood out and put it back in without getting it dirty?: 

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:Umm. Do you have syringes?:

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Based on Moondance's baffled look, evidently not!

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:So, you take a glass tube, and on one end you put a cap that has a hollow needle, and on the other end you put a cap that has a plunger, and then you can fill it with medicine and stick it in someone's arm and put the medicine directly in their blood, or you can draw their blood to do tests on or to put in other people:

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Moondance is starting to look cross-eyed. :I have about a thousand questions but maybe later, once I can write it down: He chuckles. :We have been rather hogging the floor here. Do you have questions for us?: 

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:Um. Yes. Probably. Uh. Does everyone know about magic here? Even in places that don't have weird animals and turn your hair white?:

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A smile. :Most places, yes. Though our world has different kinds of Gifts that can touch magic in different ways, and not all of them are known in all places. For example, I am a Healing-Adept – my type of Gift is not known in Valdemar, our destination. And Valdemar knows of Mindhealers, which my people do not have: He frowns. :I know of places that shun the use of magic – our sister people, the Shin'a'in, are one such – but they still know of its existence. Is this different in your homeland?: 

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:Yeah. Most people don't know magic exists, and a lot of people are scared of it when they find out. That's part of why I expected you to be scared of me although the fact that I'm big and can kill a basilisk was a lot of it. Even people like my teacher, who's completely human, have to hide.:

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Vanyel shivers. :That doesn't sound like a nice place for, er, someone like you to live: 

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:It wasn't great. I couldn't interact with any people besides my family until I was eighteen and figured out how to shapeshift.: Pause. :What did you mean by Gifts?:

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:I don't know how it is where you're from: Vanyel starts, :but in this world, you usually need something called a Gift in order to use magic at all. Mage-gift is a general way of using magic, but there are also specific Mind-Gifts – like Mindspeech, which is how all of us are talking to you: He grins. :It's really useful for that! Since we don't speak the same language. I mean, it's still not that easy to understand you but I'm getting more used to it. Are you finding us easier to understand too with practice?:

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:Yeah. I don't think we have anything like that though. Everything I know of is either stuff like my shapeshifting, or stuff like what I learned from Teacher and books, and anyone can learn that stuff. I think. I guess I dunno if people here can.:

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:Really? That is different. It's not like that here: 

They ride in thoughtful silence for a while. 

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Eventually, after some uneasy pondering: :So, if there was a kind of magic that people found extra-scary at home, but could help a lot of people, you guys would probably be fine with it, right?:

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:...Probably, yes: A considering look. :Not everyone in Valdemar would be, necessarily, but they might not be comfortable with everything I can do, either. The four of us aren't likely to be put off though. I'm rather curious now?: 

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:Um. I know how to raise the dead.:

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Both Companions stop dead. All four of the riders look shocked; Vanyel in particular has a frozen, trapped-animal look. 

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Savil nudges her stallion closer and reaches for Vanyel's hand. :Wh...at?: she sends, slowly. 

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:My teacher taught me. It was his ancestor, or a group that his ancestor had been in, that developed the technique. They weren't actually good people and they mostly used it for things like bringing back rich people to torture the locations of their hidden wealth out of them. But eventually the ancestor was killed by an angry mob. And my teacher found his notes a long time later, after his fiancee was killed. He hunted down rumors until he found them, and he brought her back. They left his hometown so people wouldn't realize, and they can't help that many people because people would scream about evil animated corpses if they knew, but when they found us they taught us. So I know how. And we're really good at it, because the invocation invokes Yog-Sothoth and Yog-Sothoth is our non-human parent.:

 

You're not mad, right?
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Savil swallows. 

:W-why: her mindvoice isn't very steady at first, :why would I be mad? I can see how that could help a lot of people – that part is wonderful. And I can see why you couldn't speak of it, back home. I'm...not sure that you ought speak of it to most people here, either. But of course I'm not mad. Just...absorbing it: She looks pretty shaken. And Vanyel is still stiff and silent and unmoving. 

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:You, um, it's not that there's a why, exactly, it's just, lots of people would be mad, and I, sometimes people are reasonable but only to a point. I'm--I'm glad you're not mad but you looked kind of, upset or something.:

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:No, of course I'm not upset: Savil seems to realize how obviously false a claim this is. :...I mean, I'm not upset with you. It, um, the subject brings up a sore spot for a few of us: 

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:Oh. I--whoever it is--was--is--will be? I'm sorry. I, um. I'm not good at...social finesse.:

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Savil gets tangled up in the was-is-will-be and just blinks helplessly at her. :I'm sorry, what?: 

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:Sorry for your loss?:

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That's a lot more comprehensible. :Your, er, condolences are accepted: She takes a breath, lets it out. :Let's keep heading for the campsite, we're not too far: 

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:If I think of anything else really big to say I'll wait to say it until we're not in motion.:

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They ride in awkward silence for a while and then Moondance gamely starts asking Lucy more questions about medicine in her world.

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Sometimes she can give enthusiastic non-jargony answers and sometimes the answer is "there's equipment for that and I don't know how it works" and sometimes the answer is "there's equipment for that and I don't know how to recreate it but I can replicate its function with magic" and sometimes the answer is "I don't know."

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Vanyel doesn't say another word for the rest of the journey, but Savil and even Starwind break in occasionally, and three or four hours later they reach the better campsite. There's a river, and a nice dry cave nearby with the remains of a fire-pit hinting it's been used for a camp before. The adults take down the Companions' saddlebags and start unpacking and setting up while Vanyel sits against the wall of the cave and hugs his knees to his chest. 

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Lucy shifts back to human form and puts her dress back on behind some trees. 

She hesitates, nibbling her lip, then goes to find Vanyel. 

:I can leave if you want. But sometimes it helps to talk.:

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He doesn't say anything or even look at her, but he doesn't tell her to go away either. 

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...She sits down beside him. 

:When I was thirteen, my grandfather died. He had helped raise us with as much love and care as Mom did, and we were all grieving. But it wasn't just sad. It was trouble. The people he had been buying cows from to feed me didn't trust Wilbur, and the food dwindled. I got hungrier. There's a reason I'm so gung-ho about eating things like wyrsa and basilisk even besides not wanting to waste lives, and it's what happened as a result. Having it get harder to think when you're really hungry is normal, so I've been led to believe. So I didn't think about it much, at the time. But when a human gets so hungry they can't think at all they just pass out. It turns out...I don't. I just stop--understanding what people are, and why you never ever eat them. That's the only time it ever, ever happened. After I lost Mom that way, I've never let it get anywhere near there again.:

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Vanyel doesn't move, or say anything. He doesn't look horrified though. Or disturbed, or scared of her. 

A little after she finishes, he starts crying. He still doesn't move at all, or show any indication that he wants her to leave. Just...cries, almost in silence. 

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She hugs her knees. She doesn't cry like he's crying, but tears roll down her cheeks. 

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Eventually, he stops crying, sniffles, dabs at his eyes with his sleeve. :S-sorry: Even his mindvoice is shaky. 

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:You never have to apologize to me for crying. Some things just aren't okay. And there's no virtue in pretending they are.

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He looks up at her, wide-open startled eyes, like - like she understands, like there's something hanging in the air between them that only the two of them can see, it's not a happy light in his eyes but it is there...

...and then he bursts into tears again and curls up in a tiny ball, shaking. 

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She definitely wants to hug him and she has no idea if that's in any way a good idea. 

...

She calls softly to her brother in English, low enough to not interrupt the crying but loud enough for her brother's hearing to catch. 

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...Sure, okay. 

He goes to find Savil. 

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Savil comes over with Wilbur a minute or so later. She looks very concerned when she sees Vanyel, but not in a way that suggests she's upset with either of them about it. 

:What is it?: she sends, excluding Vanyel from the Mindspeech link. 

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:Uh. I just wanted to know if he was a hugs person. He looks like he needs one but.:

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Quiet sigh. :You know, I'm never sure. Sometimes yes, sometimes he runs away if you try. If he hasn't run off already, though, he doesn't mind you being here: A surprised half-smile. :Means he trusts you a fair bit, which is interesting: 

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:...I told him about the time I accidentally killed someone because I didn't know things about how I worked.:

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That earns her a startled look, then a slow nod. :...Actually, knowing Van, I could see that being surprisingly - not comforting, wrong word, but...might help him feel like you understand. Like you could understand: She swipes at her nose, irritably. :I don't know, I'm no good at talking about these things: 

She sits down, and sort of leans sideways until her shoulder just touches Vanyel's, and waits. Eventually he pulls closer to her, and she puts her arm around his shoulders. 

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:The someone was my mom. I love her. I miss her. I haven't been able to bring her back because the resurrection magic needs someone's ashes and she--there wasn't even that much left. Maybe I'll find another way someday. I hope so. But meanwhile I miss her.:

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:...I'm sorry: Savil blinks. :That's awful. I'm sorry: This seems to be approximately her entire repertoire for comforting words. 

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:It was six years ago, now. I'm mostly okay. But the fact that she's dead is not and never will be. I'm going to figure out a way to fix it someday. But even if I couldn't, I--some things aren't acceptable. And a lot of people accept them anyway because they can't change them.But that's not more virtuous. I wouldn't be a bad person for not being one of them.:

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Savil takes a while to parse that. 

Then she closes her eyes. :No. I agree. Some things aren't acceptable. And it's not more virtuous to try to accept them anyway: She squeezes Vanyel more tightly.

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:Someday everyone who ever existed is gonna get to be okay. And maybe I can't pull that off but I'm never going to stop trying.:

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Savil is not going cry she is definitely not going to cry, nope nope. 

:That's...brave of you: she manages. 

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:I dunno if it is. I don't like people being dead and/or not okay. Trying to make the world the way you want it to be isn't bravery, is it, it's just sense. Things don't happen without people making them that way, so you have to pursue what you want. Besides, it's not like I have much to be scared of. Besides people hating me, I mean, but that's not really more likely if I try to help them, is it? ...It's not, right?:

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:...I mean, it's all a matter of how you define it, isn't it?: Savil sends, looking softly into the distance. :Way I see it, sure, it's sense, but...it can still be hard, right? It can still be decades of working, and – and sometimes people hating you, and having to go back in again and again and again, even when it's the last thing you want to do. I don't know. Maybe you're...more straightforward inside than me, but I care about Valdemar and it's still a struggle to get out of bed some days. And to me courage is doing it anyway: 

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:Okay, that's fair. But I want it enough. I know I do.: 

:Also, since I don't have to sleep more than a few hours a month, I get to skip the getting out of bed in the morning step, I bet that helps.:

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:Goodness. I'm jealous. And–: Savil reaches out to touch her shoulder, :I believe you. I can see it in you: 

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This is the point at which Vanyel uncurls slightly and lifts his head. 

:Lucy, how–:  He swallows, scrubs at his face. :How does...it work...the bringing back the dead? Do you think. There's any chance. It would work here in this world?: He sounds like he can't actually bring himself to believe that it could possibly work, here, or that she's telling the truth, or - there's something in the way, like a locked door that he can only rattle but can't quite open. 

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:I think so! I mean I don't see why it wouldn't. You take a body and render it to ash, or if they're already cremated you take the ash, and then you do some complicated magic chemistry--alchemy--to it, and it turns colors, and then you say an incantation and the ash turns into smoke and the smoke turns into an alive person. Who is naked, so it's best to have clothes on hand.:

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He turns away, hiding his face in Savil's tunic. :So if there wasn't any kind of remains then it wouldn't work: Utter lack of surprise, nothing but resignation there. 

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:...Yes. But it's kind of hard to not have any remains at all and I can cheat pretty hard. Did the person you're sad about get eaten too? I could try something to track down whatever ate them, maybe I could use its remains, that wouldn't normally work but I cheat SO HARD.:

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Vanyel makes a startled choking sound and then hides his face again. 

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:Not, um, eaten: Savil clarifies. :Kind of...vaporized. Turned into, er, a very large fireball. Magic thing: 

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:Oh.: Thoughtful pause. :That sounds harder but I can probably work with that. How big an explosion? Is anyone going to be perturbed if I wander around the affected area bleeding ichor on exploded stuff?:

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Savil starts to reflexively shake her head, that doesn't sound like it would go over at all, but...then she stops, and looks down at Vanyel huddled in her arms, and looks back at Lucy. 

:I don't know: she sends, and raises her chin, :but we can ask. Although, um, this happened nine months ago now. It'll have grown over some. Initial explosion hit an area about a mile across in total, I think. Should be easy to find, it'll be the part that's all black glass underneath. Forest fire around it didn't burn nearly as hot: 

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:Ooh, what if I just dug up the black glass, probably I could work with that.:

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:Maybe. Though it probably isn't, um, mostly him, I imagine it'd be the dirt and rocks that were underneath. And...er, there's some wyrsa in there. Is that a problem?: 

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:I don't even have to cheat to deal with that! There are explicit steps in the process for distilling the essential materials out of a cruft of soil and stuff! It sort of assumes there's a higher corpse-to-cruft ratio than I think we have here but I can just adjust for that no problem.:

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:Huh. Good to know: Savil falls silent. 

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Vanyel lifts his head again, and...reaches out, vaguely, in a gesture that's hinting in the general direction of 'hug'?

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Hug.

It is possible that Lucy had huggability in mind while designing this form. She is soft and her hair is cooperative enough to not get in his face particularly and there are no weird bony bits sticking into places they shouldn't. 

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It's a good hug! Possibly a lot of the goodness of it is related to the hugger's claim that she can maybe– no don't think about the thing, the hope almost makes it feel less safe, but Vanyel hugs her anyway.

It does not, actually, make him cry any less. 

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She does not mind at all. Sometimes you just need a good cry. Sometimes a good cry isn't enough, but it can't hurt. 

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Eventually, Vanyel manages to run out of crying, and is just limp and exhausted and breathing unsteadily in her arms.  

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Savil tugs at his shoulder. :Van, ke'chara, you should eat something and then try to get some sleep: They originally made camp well before sundown, but it's dark out now. Starwind and Moondance are sitting by a small campfire outside the mouth of the cave.

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Food is very important even when your hunger isn't a danger to anyone but yourself. Lucy will super cooperate with Savil in getting some food into Vanyel. 

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Vanyel is very halfhearted on the food matter. "I'm not hungry." Instead he tries to head straight for the bedrolls that Savil managed to lay out before Wilbur interrupted her. 

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:Eat. My doctor teacher also taught me that sometimes we're not hungry even when we really need food. You won't do yourself or anyone else any favors by going without.: Do they have anything extra calorie dense? She'd have saved some of the bear fat if she knew this would happen...

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Savil brings him jerky and dried fruit and cheese and travel-bread. Some of it's dense, sure, but still requires enough chewing to be a lot of effort to get the nourishment. 

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:Do you want me to do some hunting tonight? If I had something freshly-killed I could soften some of that by re-cooking it in fat and then it would be even-more calorie dense,: Lucy suggests to Savil. :I'll be up all night anyway.:

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:...If you really don't need the sleep and you've got the time after taking care of the basilisk, then yes, it would be useful: Savil admits. :We hunt sometimes to re-supply but it tends to require detours. Er, most species here aren't good for humans to eat, but I'll show you some that are: She attempts to send some images from her memories – there are some fat flying-squirrel-type animals, and some deer-like things, and a few others. 

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:I slept just last week. Sometimes it's convenient being me. Alright, I'll see how much time I have after I've dealt with the basilisk.:

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Vanyel shoves down the rest of the bread and cheese, and flops down on his bedroll. :Don't go yet?: he sends, a bit plaintively. 

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:Okay. I can stay until you're asleep if you want.:

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Vanyel nods and then closes his eyes. 

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Savil pulls the blanket properly over him, and strokes his hair. :He doesn't usually warm up to people this quickly: she sends privately to Lucy. :Took him months to be this comfortable with ME. And I'm family – though, uh, that probably hurt rather than helped in this case: 

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:Bad home life?:

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:Yes. Definitely. My brother – well, we've never gotten along. Honestly he thought most of what Van was, wasn't good enough, but he especially couldn't tolerate his falling in love with a boy: She scowls. :He'll be lucky if I speak to him at all in the next ten years: 

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:Oh dear. Even if I couldn't meet other people, everyone I grew up with loved me. It's awful when people don't get that. Is the boy the dead person?:

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:Yes. They were...: She chews her lip. :Do you have lifebonds, where you're from?:

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:No. What's that?:

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Oh no now she has to explain it. Deep breath. :It's a...sort of magical link between two people. We don't know why they happen – Starwind and Moondance's people believe it's when the gods meddle. But it's a very deep bond. It's devastating to lose a lifebonded partner. As far as we know, Van is the first person ever to have survived it for this long. And he really didn't want to, at the beginning: She swipes at her eyes. :It's...been a really, really hard last nine months. And I don't know that it would ever get easier for him: 

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:Oh NO. I'll do whatever it takes. Uh, I won't hurt people. Not hurt them hurt them. But if I have to sneak into the explosion place under cover of night and steal all the glass--if I have to invent a dozen new spells--I'll fix it.:

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Savil...looks like she has no idea how to respond. 

Finally, after a long pause, she just reaches out and takes Lucy's hand and grips it hard. :Thank you: She glances down at Vanyel. :I think he's asleep. You can go: 

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:Okay.: 

She goes behind a tree and strips and changes, then gallops back in the direction of the basilisk. 

It still tastes utterly terrible. But she can distract herself by puzzling out how to get all the bones out and preserve more rather than less of the structural integrity of the hide. And it's easier to stand the amount of uch from slurping flesh off a bone than from just taking a great big bite. 

This takes her a few hours, but it's still well shy of dawn when she finishes. She collects the hide and the bones and heads back to the new campsite, keeping an eye out for any of the creatures Savil mentioned as human-edible. 

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If her sense of smell is good enough, she might find a nest of the squirrel-creatures, asleep in the crook of a tree. 

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Oh nooooo they're so little and asleep. ...She decides to keep looking. 

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Eventually she startles a deer-looking animal into bolting out of a bush. 

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She's faster. 

She snaps its neck and then makes her way swiftly and quietly the rest of the way back to camp. 

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It's still dark with just a faint pearly glow on the horizon, and the humans are all fast asleep, but one of the white horses rises gracefully when she arrives. 

:Lucy: A voice in her mind that feels somehow different from the humans' Mindspeech, brighter and giving the impression of flashing blue light and ringing steel. :I wanted to thank you. For what you said - did - want to do, for my Chosen: 

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:Whoah you're a person??? Is the other horse a person too? Sorry! I didn't mean to ignore you.:

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A chuckle in her mind, bizarrely reminiscent of roasting chestnuts. :Please, it’s all right. We generally don’t talk directly to people other than our Heralds. But...: she hesitates, :well, I do a lot of things I’m not really meant to. Especially where Vanyel is concerned:

The care and love and concern she feels for Vanyel is incredibly loud in her mindvoice. 

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:I like him. He's good. I want him to not have to be so sad.:

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:...So do I: Large blue eyes stare into hers. :So, so badly: 

She tosses her head. :You know, what Savil said is true. He seems to like you. And it’s not often he trusts people at all, much less within a day. I don’t know what to make of it:

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:Maybe it's because I told him about how I accidentally killed my mom.:

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:Huh: Yfandes just seems bemused at first, then ponderously nods. :I...could see it. Sometimes he doesn't want comfort, and it's hard to know what to do. But...that might do it. Knowing that you can understand what it's like to lose something irreplaceable: She steps delicately closer, nudges her muzzle against Lucy's shoulder. :And, I'm sorry: 

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:I'm not ongoingly always sad about it. I miss her but it doesn't hurt as much. But it's not okay and I won't pretend it is.: Lucy tentatively pets Yfandes' mane with a tentacle. 

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Yfandes likes being petted! A lot! She prances closer and turns her head so Lucy can reach her mane more easily. 

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Oooh pet pet pet. Lucy can give so many pets. Having lots of prehensile tentacles is good for that. 

:What other kinds of people are there that don't look like humans? I assume if basilisks or wyrsa were that someone would have told me...:

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:No! Basilisks are, well, they barely have minds. Wyrsa are smarter, enough to be dangerous, but still only around as clever as a dog – do you have dogs in your world? Anyway, there are other races that are as smart as people. Hertasi are one, they look like this: Yfandes sends over a mental images, a lizard-like creature standing on its hind legs, obvious intelligence in its beady dark eyes. :They live with the Tayledras, Starwind and Moondance's people. Hmm. There are also dyheli: an image of a deer-like creature with a high domed forehead and front-facing eyes, :they live in the Pelagirs so we may see some. And tervardi: something that looks like a large, delicate bird, :though we probably won't see them. That's all the species I know of. There may be more I haven't: 

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:Okay. I probably won't run into any you've never even heard of. I'm really glad I didn't accidentally kill a dyheli before you guys found us. Oh, and yes, we have dogs.:

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The sun is just barely up now, and the humans start to stir. Moondance is the first one awake – he carefully disentangles himself from Starwind without waking him, stretches, and wanders over. :Bright the day: 

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By this time, Lucy has shifted back to human form. 

:Hi! I cleaned all the bones, and I put the hide somewhere downwind. Thank you for finding me before I accidentally killed a dyheli.:

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He blinks at her. :...Oh, I see, did Yfandes tell you about the dyheli?: A smile. :I am also glad that we found you. For many reasons, now: He glimpses the dead deer-creature. :Oh! Did you have a successful hunt? I did not know you were planning one: 

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Nod. :Vanyel was having trouble eating so I said I would hunt something so I could re-cook the tough food in fat so it would be softer and more energy-dense. I didn't know Yfandes and Kellan were people but Yfandes came to talk to me and I wanted to know what else was people but not human-shaped so I wouldn't kill anyone by accident.:

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:How good of you! Convincing our young one to eat is a neverending trial: He glances around. :Would you like to cook it now, or tonight? We will likely not break camp for another several candlemarks: 

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:Now's fine. I would have done it during the night except Wilbur has our flint and steel and I didn't wanna wake anyone.:

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:Oh! You needs not wait – I might relight the fire for you with my magic: He looks around. :Though we are short on firewood: 

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:Oh! I can fix that!: She runs off into the trees and comes back a few minutes later with an array of fallen branches. :I assumed you guys would have some way to light a fire but I didn't know if it would be magic or more flint.:

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Moondance smiles brightly at her, arranges some of the branches, and then gestures at the firepit and they burst into flames. :There: 

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She claps her hands together, delighted. :Ee! That looks so cool.:

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Moondance chuckles. :Magic is. I made a very similar noise, when I cast fire for the first time: He sits down on a rock. 

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Savil is the next awake; again, she's careful not to wake Vanyel, sleeping beside her. She moves stiffly, one hand on her lower back. :Bright the day, Moondance, Lucy: 

 

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:Wind to thy wings, sister: Moondance answers, rising and giving her a one-armed hug. 

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:Hi!: Lucy says, looking up from where she's supervising jerky and dried fruit softening in a pot of bubbling not-deer fat. :I found a not-deer. And met Yfandes. She's sweet, I like her.:

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Savil grins. :She is, isn't she? Oh - do you want to meet my Kellan?: The white stallion is now ambling over after drinking his fill from the river. 

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:I'd love to!:

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:Pleased to meet you, Lucy: Kellan is both less cuddly and less chatty than Yfandes, but does seem genuinely pleased to meet her.

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Starwind is up shortly later, and then Vanyel sits up and yawns and drags himself out of his bedroll, and stumbles over still wearing the blanket. :Morning: he sends, looking at his feet. :I'm sorry about yesterday: 

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:Huh? Sorry about what? I told you you never need to apologize to me for crying and I meant it:

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Vanyel nods and smiles weakly and then accepts the tea Savil gives him and sits down with his arms around his knees. 

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Lucy fishes a piece of fruit out of the boiling oil with her bare hand and blows on it to cool it down.

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Vanyel is staring into space and so doesn't see her doing it, but the others look a mixture of impressed and discomfited. 

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Once the fruit is cool enough for comfortable human consumption she offers it to Vanyel. 

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He gives it a dubious look but puts it in his mouth and chews it. :...Huh, that's sort of good:

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:You were having trouble eating so I thought something easier to chew and denser in energy would be good!:

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He looks surprised and a bit uncomfortable, but nods. :Thank you:

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:I was thinking: Savil starts, joining Vanyel on the log where he's sitting. :If we're going to, er, do this - we should detour by the Frelennye lands on our way back. It's not that far out of our way, but we maybe do want to head slightly further east. Also, we should start teaching you Valdemaran. Most people aren't Mindspeakers:

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Vanyel flinches at the name but mostly keeps his composure. 

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Lucy is very very pleased about being helpful. 

:Okay! I think I'm pretty good at languages but it's hard to tell, I haven't tried to learn any since I was little. How do we do this?:

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:I had to learn Latin at one point. I think the early stage usually involves lists of vocabulary words and conjugating irregular verbs.:

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Savil chuckles. "My Rethwellani tutor had us do the same! I think we can do it better. Since we can speak this way, how do you think it'd work if we started repeating everything in Valdemaran as well? Bit more natural." (She repeats the foreign words in Mindspeech as well.)

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:Okay! And whenever I want to say something I've learned how to I will.:

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"Sounds good!" 

They finish eating (Vanyel manages to get down a reasonable amount of Lucy's new meal idea), and pack up, and look at Starwind's map. "I think we want to keep following the river? And we should be out of the Pelagirs in another couple weeks, then we'll make much better time." 

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"Sounds good!" 

You might think that her voice would sound less chipper-young-woman in the giant basilisk-eating body, but no. 

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They start moving. The Companions are pretty fast, even carrying two people each, but the dense trees still get in their way. 

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Lucy is if anything capable of being even faster than the Companions, but the trees also hinder her more. If she tires at all, though, she doesn't say. 

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They travel until nearly dusk and camp along the river again that night. The next days - weeks - fall into a similar routine. Long days on the road, conversation when they have the energy for it, stopping sometimes to hunt, various campsites. Once, fighting off more wyrsa. The forest is still weird but gradually less so. 

Sometimes Vanyel is animated enough to ask Lucy and Wilbur questions about their world. Sometimes he's silent and withdrawn, and a few times they delay breaking camp because he refuses to get out of his bedroll. 

Just under a fortnight later, they reach the official border with Valdemar. It's not very visually obvious; still forest, albeit mostly a normal one at this point. Starwind and Moondance will part ways with them here and head back to their own people. 

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Lucy eats the wyrsa and answers Vanyel's questions enthusiastically and takes his silences in stride and re-cooks more tough travel rations in oil. 

When they reach the border, she asks, "Are there guards? Should I look human?"

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Savil laughs. "Hells, no! If we were coming in on a major road from somewhere like Hardorn, sure. But this is really far out in the border region. Though there's a higher chance we'll run into hunters in the woods, but Van or I ought to sense them coming. Once we hit the road in a day or two, probably you do need to look human." 

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"Do borders in your world have guards everywhere?" Vanyel asks curiously. 

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"I don't know if it's everywhere but there are guards who want to know what you're bringing in and out of the country so they can assign import and export taxes."

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Vanyel has never heard of the concept of import and export taxes, and is fascinated and wants to hear more. 

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Lucy doesn't know that much about them, but the basic idea is that governments sometimes tax foreign products to encourage people to buy domestic products so there will be more jobs in the country. Also there's this thing called an "embargo" where you tax stuff from one foreign country in particular so they can't sell as much because you're not on friendly terms with them. 

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How odd! Most people in Valdemar can't afford to buy foreign products at all, Vanyel explains. It costs so much just to transport them in, merchants have to charge much higher prices. Jewelry and cloth and pottery come in from Rethwellan and other neighbouring countries, and spices from Seejay, but only wealthy people can afford to buy them. Is it not like that in her world? 

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Well, she thinks it's usually, like, food and raw materials and stuff, more often than anything else? But spices and stuff aren't that expensive anymore--she thinks it's because of advances in ship technology. 

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Vanyel seems eager to keep asking her questions about shipping technology, and whatever questions those questions lead to, until they stop for lunch.

They don't run into any people, but there are deer – normal deer, not dyheli and definitely not weird Pelagirs changelings. 

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She'll kill deer for venison if they need it but otherwise she'll leave them alone. Or just watch them. 

"Deer are pretty."

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They're good on rations for now - they're about to hit inhabited areas, where they can buy much tastier food. 

"I think so too," Vanyel agrees. "My father used to make us all go on hunts, but I always hated having to kill them." 

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"I don't mind hunting as long as nothing goes to waste, but it's never fun. I mean, it's a lot more fun than being even a little hungry, but I'd rather eat cows than deer."

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"Mmm." Vanyel seems to be running out of stamina for talking. 

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That's alright. Lucy's plenty capable of occupying herself with other things, like watching animals quietly, or talking to her brother, or practicing the language, or reading the books that came through with them.

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Before the end of the day, they reach their first smallholders' farm. Savil rides up to greet the farmers, and then waves to let the others know that they're invited in. 

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Wilbur approaches slowly in case someone decides to take exception to his height. 

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...Lucy isn't being deliberate like Wilbur is, but she's still a little nervous. 

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The couple who greets them seem a bit...startled...but Savil and Vanyel are in Heraldic uniforms, with Companions right there, if they're calm about it then it's got to be fine and it would be terrible to be rude to a Herald's guest. It does present some issues in terms of his fitting into their tiny cottage. But it's beautiful summer weather, so they can sit outdoors while supper is prepared. 

The couple has four children between the ages of four and ten, who appear one by one. They're shy at first, but the Companions are familiar and exciting and bring them out of their shell, and after that they start showing interest in Lucy and Wilbur. 

"How did you get so big?" the six-year-old boy asks Wilbur. "Mama says if I eat my greens and my meat I'll grow up big and strong. Is that what you did?" 

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"If you eat your greens and meat you'll grow up big and strong, but not this big. I'm just like this. Sometimes people are born a little different and something weird happens, like growing up very very big or not very big at all or having funny patches of color on their skin."

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"Oh." The boy tilts his head to the side and thinks about that for a while. 

His older sister turns to Lucy. "Your hair is pretty. Can I touch it?" 

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"Sure!"

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The girl plays with it, eventually starts putting some in a braid. "...Your hair's white but you're not old at all," she says. "Why is it white?" 

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"Well, my mother's hair was white, too, and she wasn't old. I think it's just one of those things, like Wilbur being big."

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"I wish my hair was white," the girl says sadly. (It's a dull earthy brown, the same as her entire family.) "It looks so nice and shiny in the sun." 

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"I think your hair looks very nice. There are things you can get hair with your texture to do that are much harder when your hair is as smooth as mine."

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"Ooh, ooh, like what? Are they pretty? Mama will braid my hair sometimes but I think it looks boring." 

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"Does she do a normal three-stranded plait?"

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"Yes," the oldest girl answers for her, showing her own single braid hanging down her back. "I thought that's what a plait was. Are there other kinds?" 

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"Yeah! Want me to show you?"

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"Me first me first!" the younger sister says, jumping up and down. 

Her littler brothers look jealous. (Their hair is cropped at ear-length). 

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Lucy has to go slow and concentrate some--it turns out this hairstyle is significantly harder with only two hands--but she can still answer questions during if there are any.

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Then the older sister wants it too, and Vanyel plays with the younger two boys, who are kind of bored of hairstyling by now. He seems to like children.

By the time she's done, supper is ready. The meal is almost certainly not one that the farmers can afford to eat every day; they're pulling out their best for the visiting Heralds. (The children are delighted). There's fresh bread, and butter and soft cheese and berry-jam to go with it, and then creamy soup, and greens drizzled with honey, and a whole roasted chicken. The mother offers weak homebrewed barley-ale to the Heralds and to Lucy and Wilbur. 

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...Lucy has no idea what affect alcohol is likely to have on her, but...well, it's basically a weak neurotoxin, and it's not like any other toxins have any effect on her? She will accept. 

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Yeah, sure.

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They eat and drink and Vanyel eats way more than usual with much less fuss. Savil drinks quite a lot of the ale, until her cheeks are pink and she starts regaling the little ones with (both censored and embellished) stories of her adventures as a Herald. 

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Lucy, true to her predictions, does not get even a little bit tipsy from the amount of ale she drinks. 

The food is delicious, though, and she's effusive in her praises of it. 

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It's dark by the time they're done, and time to retire to bed. The couple is apologetic; their cottage only has two rooms, the parents sleep in one of them and the littles sleep all together in a straw-ticking mattress in a sort of attic-loft. Maybe the two ladies can have the couple's bed, and the boy can have the loft? The family can sleep out in the barn for a night. But they don't have a bed big enough for Wilbur, and are worried he's going to be terribly offended about having to sleep out in the barn too. 

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"We," Savil says firmly, "absolutely do not need to take over your beds. In fact, we can all sleep out in the barn. Us Heralds like to be near our Companions." :Lucy, does that suit you all right?:

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:Hay is soft!:

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"Mama Mama but we want to sleep in the barn!" The children seem to think this sounds like great fun. 

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:I haven't interacted with a child since Wilbur when we were little but it turns out they're great.:

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The parents are eventually persuaded that a sleepover in the barn is acceptable, and the children run off giggling and grinning to collect their blankets and bring them over. The barn smells very strongly of the chickens and milch-cow that the family owns, but it's roomy and warm and has some open space to bed down. 

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Lucy and Wilbur didn't even hate the Wyrsa stink that much, the barn smells fine. 

Lucy will cheerfully tell the children stories from her world for later than their parents would probably be happy about but eventually has to insist they sleep and pretend to do the same. 

...It's nice, being curled up in human form somewhere cozy surrounded by people who like her. 

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They're woken early, unfortunately. The chickens don't see any reason to change their routine based on the visiting humans, and they're loud

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Vanyel stays in his bedroll for a while looking grumpy about this fact but eventually drags himself up with a resigned look. 

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:Does this world have coffee?: Lucy asks Savil. 

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Savil has no idea what she’s talking about. Some people find that tea helps them wake up? But the party doesn’t have any real tea with them, and the farmers certainly don’t, it’s usually bought from Rethwellani merchants because the growing climate there is better for it.

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:Oh yeah the trade thing. Um, coffee is sort of like tea, only much stronger, and instead of leaves it's beans and you roast and grind them first. But if tea is expensive you probably don't have coffee even if it's anywhere.:

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That seems plausible to Savil. 

Breakfast is good, though, leftover bread from supper and jam again and pease-porridge with cream. Then they might as well make an early start on their journey. There's a dirt track that goes from the smallholders' land to the nearest actual road, since they do sometimes go sell some of their cheese in the market at the nearest town so they can buy other goods. That ought to make their journey go faster. 

Once they reach the road, Savil thinks it's about a day's journey to the Frelennye lands. Maybe two more days total, if they're lucky. 

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Oh good! It turns out Lucy bounces when she is excited. 

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The children aren't sure what she's so excited about but they're going to be excited along with her! Bounce bounce bounce. They wave until the party is out of sight. 

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Vanyel, it turns out, does not cope well with sleep deprivation. He's having a terrible day. He actually keeps it pretty under control during the morning, he's more withdrawn than usual but occasionally participates in the conversation. 

About a candlemark after their hasty stop for lunch, though, Savil says something innocuous-seeming and he bursts into tears. The Companions stop moving. Savil seems unsure what to do.  

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Lucy is pretty sure she knows what to do! The thing is hug him and let him cry on her. 

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Then Vanyel is going to cry on her for a while. 

Eventually he calms down a bit and wants to complain. In Mindspeech because talking is hard when one is still kind of crying. :I hate everything. I hate traveling, I hate sleeping in weird uncomfortable places, I don't want to have to talk to any more strangers, I want to be HOME: 

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:Man, you know, that is so valid, travel is exhausting and strangers are really difficult and I dunno about the sleep one 'cause my sleep is weird but it sounds super plausible.:

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Vanyel sniffles. :I guess I have to. It's not going to be any better if we just stop in the middle of nowhere. And Gating would be worse: 

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:Yeah, sometimes we have to do things that really suck. Doesn't stop 'em from sucking.:

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That seems to help a bit. Vanyel stays hugging her for a while and then pulls free. "We should keep going so we don't get delayed." 

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Nodnod. 

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They do successfully reach the town before nightfall, despite the stop. It's big enough to have an inn. Savil suggests they stay there instead of trying their luck camping. Conveniently, it has high ceilings – Wilbur only has to stoop a bit to get in – and there's a two-room suite available with two big beds in it. 

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When they go down to eat, Vanyel takes one look at the crowded, raucous taproom and flees back to the room to hide.  

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Lucy...stays for food. But she flees back upstairs as soon as she's bolted a reasonable supper down. 

"That is too many people. I like people and that is too many."

She puts down a handful of food items she'd grabbed beside where Vanyel is sitting. "You should probably eat." 

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Vanyel is exhausted at this point, but manages to pick at the food until Savil and Wilbur get back and they talk about allocating beds. Savil and Vanyel can share one – it's unclear if Lucy and Wilbur will both fit comfortably in the other, spacious or not, if Wilbur wants to fit at all he'll need to scrunch up. 

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Wilbur can curl up. 

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"I don't need to be in a bed, I can just sit up reading."

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"Silly me, that's right, I always forget you don't actually need sleep." 

They bed down for the night. 

...Vanyel has nightmares and wakes everyone up twice by screaming in the middle of the night. It's not the first time this has happened but it's not that frequent. 

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...Will it help if Lucy starts quietly petting him in his sleep. 

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Vanyel does stay asleep after this point. At dawn, Savil yanks the curtains shut and donates her cloak to make it even darker, and then declares that they are not leaving until Vanyel has had enough sleep, if he has two nights of bad sleep in a row then today will be a disaster. 

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Lucy gives Savil a thumbs-up. "How does Yfandes stand being in stables where she can't help?" Lucy asks quietly. 

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"She hates it," Savil whispers back. "In k'Treva he used to sleep out with her a lot – they don't really have weather there, there's a shield over the whole Vale. Staying in the barn would've been good for that if not for stupid chickens." 

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"It sucks. And she can't hug him. I'm so glad I have tentacles when I'm not a biped." 

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Savil had honestly not thought about whether tentacles would be good for hugs, but she supposes it makes sense.

With pets, Vanyel manages to sleep until almost noon – he was apparently pretty behind. They're definitely not going to make the rest of the journey in one leg, at this point. 

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Oh Well, sometimes you do what you need to do. She read somewhere that humans need sleep like they need food and food is not a matter to fuck around with. 

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Vanyel does seem to be in a better mood than the day before when they set out, although he's pretty tense. 

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Lucy spends much of the day's journey quietly sympathizing with Yfandes over the difficulties of a horse body in taking care of a Vanyel. 

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There's no convenient town, or farm, so they're going to have to camp off the side of the road again. Savil does manage to scout out a nice little meadow with a stream nearby, and she can cast a weather-barrier spell, which keeps it a nice temperature for sleeping and will hold off dew and rain. 

Conveniently they've covered more than half the total distance that they were planning to originally, so tomorrow will be a short leg. A couple of candlemarks on the road, which according to Savil's past experience on circuit gets busy around the harvest, but is currently quiet enough that Savil feels comfortable with Lucy spending most of it in her big form and only switching to human if her Thoughtsensing detects someone coming. Then a few more down a dirt side track much like the one they came up through, and they'll be there. 

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Vanyel seems kind of terrified at the prospect. 

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Lucy is careful not to leave tracks so obvious people are definitely going to be like, "A giant thing came this way and we should be alarmed." 

Vanyel's fear is pretty reasonable. She'd have all the butterflies in her stomach if she was headed to Dunwich to get Mom back. 

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Since they're sleeping out in the open, Vanyel curls up against Yfandes. He's going to wake up with a sore neck if he sleeps in that position, but he definitely wants to be near her. 

Eventually he glances hopefully at Lucy. 

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Lucy cuddles up on the other side of Yfandes. It turns out her tentacles are long enough to hug both Herald and Companion very comfortably. 

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Maybe being snuggled by invisible tentacles ought to be weird, but it lets him wiggle into a much more comfortable position while still touching Yfandes, and it's not like anything else has been normal ever since the Thing happened, so...it's fine, it's good, and he manages to sleep remarkably well given how terrifying it is to be approaching the place where (the things he doesn't want to think about) happened. 

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It is Lucy's opinion that Many tentacles are much snugglier than just two human arms. It would be valid for Vanyel to be weirded out anyway but she is glad he is not. 

She's safe with these people. She's happy with these people. She is going to solve the thing Vanyel doesn't want to think about and then things will be okay, in this little tiny corner of the world if not in general. 

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In the morning, Savil doesn't seem to be particularly in a hurry to leave either. She packs up very slowly and carefully, her face unreadable. 

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"Are you okay?"

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"Fine. Just," Savil glances away, "it's not going to be easy, seeing the place again. It's got to be a hundred times worse for Van." 

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"Oh. Yeah, I bet. Um. This is probably a dumb question, but, would it help if you wore a blindfold." 

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"Huh. Thank you for the suggestion." She thinks for a moment. "I don't think it would for me. I hate not being able to see what's going on. And, well, I can grit my teeth and manage. Anticipating it is probably worse than the actual thing. But it does give me an idea. It might help Van if you were to carry him. He's not going to keep his eyes closed on Yfandes, but someone who can eat wyrsa for breakfast..." 

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"Okay!" 

She looks for Vanyel. 

"Vanyel? Savil had an idea. She said being where it happened would be hard for her and I said maybe it was a dumb idea but would a blindfold help and she said not for her but since I can eat wyrsa no problem, she said maybe it would be better if you rode me instead of Yfandes and didn't look." 

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Vanyel, who had been busy washing up quickly in the stream, freezes. It takes him a while to answer and when he does it's in Mindspeech. :Maybe. I'm scared I won't be able to make myself actually...go there. But I don't want to get left behind either: 

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"And if I wrap my tentacles all around you so you can't be seen except through them then you'll be invisible too and nobody can try to talk to you. I don't know why that's how it works but it is, like how you can see stuff I'm eating in this shape until my mouth closes. And you can just lie down and get hugs and not have to deal with things and not get left behind." 

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"All right." Vanyel would have been way too embarrassed to ask for that, it's a stupid thing to need, but it does seem much easier than having to ride in and wait for the scenery to start looking familiar. 

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Lucy helps him climb up her side and then snuggles him invisible. There are a lot of tentacles involved, and she's careful not to hug him so tight as to be restraining, and puts enough layers around his head that he's still invisible but there are gaps so he doesn't have trouble breathing or anything. 

...Then it occurs to her to tell Savil. She walks over, her many-legged gait smoother than a carriage or a horse. 

"Savil? I thought you should know so you don't worry, I've got Vanyel all snuggled up and when I'm covering something or someone up completely they're invisible too, like how it works when I eat, except I need to find a better metaphor because I keep thinking that one sounds threatening."

 

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"Goodness, yes, that isn't the best metaphor. But thank you." She frowns. "It'll make it awkward to turn human again if someone's coming, when you've just gotten him cozy in there. Suppose maybe you can put your brother down and duck against the side of the road and we'll stick by you so no one runs into you. They can't actually see you." 

They depart. 

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Wilbur rides more on Lucy's side than her top for easier disembarking in case of witnesses. 

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It's really quiet. They only pass one traveler, on horseback and in a hurry, before Savil stops and double-checks her map. "I think this is where we turn off?" It's a narrow rutted dirt track that vanishes off into the woods. 

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Vanyel, who can still hear their voices just fine, tenses up involuntarily. 

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Lucy is slowed down a little bit by the narrowness but she manages. 

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As they travel, the forest starts out normal, but then they start running into the half-blackened trees. By the time a candlemark has passed, nearly all the undergrowth is gone and the trees that are still standing all show signs of fire damage.

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Savil grunts at the map. “Gods. We’re still miles away.”

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:This is where it happened? Or, miles away is?: she asks Savil, not wanting to make Vanyel pay any more attention to their location than necessary. 

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:Miles away is. I hadn't realized the fire came this far: She shakes her head. :Would've just been an ordinary forest fire by then, this far out. Not the, er, explosion. Just turns out that trees are flammable: 

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:Oh. Yeah. Did you know that there are kinds of trees that can only sprout right after a fire passes through? Some places want to burn every so often.: 

:I don't think this was one of them.:

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:No: Savil's face is unreadable. She keeps riding. 

A few minutes later: :Uh oh. We've got company. Headed this way: 

There definitely isn't room here for Lucy to move to one side of the path. 

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Um. Um. Umumumum--

She puts Wilbur down and climbs a tree. 

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It's a good thing no one is watching the branches wiggle as she moves invisibly into place, but she gets up. 

A couple of minutes later, a lanky teenaged boy on a pack-laden donkey comes down the path. He stops when he sees Savil. "Herald?" If he notices the mysteriously unaccompanied Companion, he doesn't say anything about it. "Do I...know you, ma'am?" 

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Vanyel can't put a name to the voice, but he recognizes it, and goes rigid. 

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Oh nooooooo

:Vanyel is it okay if I cover your ears?:

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:Please: He's trying to cover his own ears but it's not quite effective enough to block out all sound. 

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She covers his ears. Her tentacles are sort of squishy, enough that she can smush them against his ears so he has a bunch of insulation instead of just the amount that one of her tentacle-tips is wide. 

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Success. Vanyel is not going to hear the ensuing conversation. He's kind of upset anyway, but Lucy is comforting and he trusts her and she isn't going to let anything bad happen to him. 

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"Herald-Mage Savil," Savil says, quirking her head at the boy. 

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"I do know you!" He squirms. "You were here last year. When the Thing happened." He says it with capital letters too. 

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"Yes. I'm coming by to visit Vanissa and talk to her. Are you headed to the town market? You can go ahead past." She'll dismount so Kellan can edge right up against the trees. 

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He nods and obeys, though he keeps craning his neck back to look at her curiously. 

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Savil remounts and grits her teeth and keeps going. :Wish I remembered the lad at all. I suppose the visiting Herald-Mage was a lot more memorable to him than one of a pack of cousins was to me: 

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:I bet I'd be even more memorable if I wasn't invisible in this form. Have I mentioned lately that I love my shapeshifting? I love my shapeshifting.:

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Savil laughs; there's some nervousness under it. They keep moving. 

The closer they get, the worse it looks. By the time Savil privately Mindspeaks Lucy and Wilbur that they must be almost there, less than half of the trees are still standing, and the ones that are, are blackened all the way up the trunks; it's obvious where new leaves have pushed their way out from soot-stained branches.

The air is starting to carry a definite scorched smell. 

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Vanyel curls up tighter and tighter in Lucy's grip. Focus on breathing. All he has to do is stay perfectly still and not look. Or think. That shouldn't be too hard. He keeps telling himself that and - and it's not completely plausible, but it's unclear what else he can do at this point. 

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...Lucy, for lack of a better idea, starts to sing a lullabye in English her mother used to sing to her and Wilbur. 

Sleep now, my dear one, the world does not know

Just who you are or just how you will grow 

The world's full of wonders, and you are their gem

And you'll reach far higher than any of them

I know things are hard now, but go you to sleep

The morning comes nigh and our problems will keep

Sleep now, my dear one, this time is for rest 

So cuddle up cozy and safe in your nest 

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Vanyel doesn't understand any of the words, of course, but it's a pretty tune and Lucy has a nice voice, and it's something he can focus on other than the smell and the fact that he knows exactly where they are, even if he can't see it. 

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The keep is visible to the others from a good distance, between the remaining trees. It's intact, mostly, but blackened and scorched all along one side. On the opposite side is a plain of soot and ash, broken by the occasional splintered remains of a tree; in the distance, something glints mirror-black in the afternoon sun. It might be water? It probably isn't. 

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Savil shudders. "Ugh. I hoped it'd look better than I remembered. I don't know why I thought it might." 

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:Because it's been ...months? And things get better with time?:

When she's finished the lullaby she starts in on Ain't Misbehavin'.

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Savil scowls at the damaged keep. :I need to go in there and talk to someone: She doesn't move, though. 

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It turns out she doesn't have to. A woman steps out onto a rebuilt front porch; the wood shines crisp and new and strangely out of place with the rest. "...Herald?" She marches toward them, hand on her hip, and it turns out that she's even younger than she looked at first glance, maybe twenty-one. "Herald-Mage Savil, is that you?" 

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:Stay back: Savil sends to Lucy. Hopefully Vanissa Frelennye, Lady Holder, isn't going to object to Wilbur's unusual height any more than the farmers or innkeeper did. 

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Lucy not only stays back, she skitters away far enough that the woman can't hear her singing, while still being close enough that her above-human hearing can eavesdrop on said woman's conversation with Savil. 

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"It's me," Savil says, slipping down from the saddle and walking over. "I came to speak to you about," she hesitates, fidgets with her sleeve, "er, it's kind of an awkward question, but - I need to go have a look at the area where your cousin died. Tylendel, I mean," as if that wasn't obvious. "I'm doing some research on how a Final Strike works, and, um, it's very important that I go and look at what's left out there." 

(She's rather proud of that tale. It sounds vaguely plausible even to her. Vanissa doesn't know anything about magic, she shouldn't have any reason to object.) 

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The stranger stops. "Huh." She doesn't seem upset, though, just curious. "How fascinating. Um, if it's relevant at all, we did try to bury some of the remains?" 

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Oh that is good to know. Visions of vaguely occult chemistry setups dance in her head. 

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"What?" Savil says, going still.

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Vanissa shakes her head. "I mean, there wasn't much left or anything. But - I mean, it's kind of silly, really, but I went out the next day, as soon as it'd cooled down enough, and I found the closest part to the middle, and I scraped up all the ashes I could find until I had an urn full, and we buried that. Is that helpful?" 

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Savil wouldn't know. :Lucy, is it?: she sends. 

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:Very!:

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"Yes. It is." Her voice is a bit choked. "Some of my, um, traveling-companions are further back – we can camp, but would you have room to put us up?" Surely Lucy can't stay invisible with Vanyel hidden in her tentacles forever. At the very least, he needs to eat at some point. 

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:Hey, Vanyel, no specifics, but we got some good news.:

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:Oh. That's good: He probably doesn't want to know the specifics. :Um. I don't really want to go out there: he's assuming they've reached the keep and– no don't think about it, :but I am going to have to use the privy at some point: 

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:Ohhhhhh yeah that is a thing normal people have to do. I can run back a ways and put you down and run back here when you're done?:

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:Um how far would you have to go before it looks - not like the thing happened?: It's been smelling burnt for a while now. He grits his teeth. :This is really stupid. I can't hide the whole time. I should just try to get it over with: 

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:I doooooooon't think trauma works that way. Uh, a ways, but it's not that far at speed.:

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:All right you can do that: It might be stupid but he also really doesn't want to un-hide yet. :What about when I need to eat?:

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:I think I smelled some blackberries.:

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Blackberries aren't really a meal but then again it's not like he's very hungry either. :All right: 

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She reaches a part of the forest that has not been obviously touched by fire if you are a human, puts Vanyel down, and goes haring off for blackberries. And other edibles if she identifies any. Not mushrooms, though, she can't reliably tell the human-edible ones apart from the ones that are only safe for her consumption. 

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Vanyel relieves himself, and then sits on a fallen log and hugs himself and tries to think about literally anything other than the current mission. And wishes Yfandes was there. 

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Lucy returns. 

:Blackberries! And some wild raspberries, too, I dunno about you but I love those. Uh, not that you should save any for me, I'm not hungry, I can eat lotsa stuff humans can't.:

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Vanyel eats as much as he can manage but does save some raspberries for. :Um, do we need to go back?: 

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:Yeah.:

She picks him up and wraps him off and speeds back in Savil's direction. 

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Savil is still loitering on the front porch talking to Vanissa, with Wilbur nearby. She can't see Lucy, obviously, but she can sense her coming. :Lucy, were you going to go human-shape and introduce yourself at some point, or is that going to be problematic? She's volunteering to show me the place where it happened before sunset, but I'm not going to be able to tell anything: Pause. :Er, how is Van coping?: 

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:He's not great, but he's not having a panic attack or anything. ...I could put him down somewhere out of sight and tell him to keep his eyes closed while I do human-shaped things? Especially if Yfandes was there. But, um, I don't think it's a good idea to make him...interact with being here in particular.:

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:That makes sense: Savil pauses to answer one of Vanissa's small-talk questions. :Er, where is he going to sleep tonight? Do you think it'd be all right if he came inside - he could walk in with his eyes closed - and slept in a room he hasn't seen before? Or should we try not to stay the night at all? I...didn't think this through, I didn't realize it would be that level of bad for him just to be here: 

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:He could sleep on me probably, he is currently pretty horizontal and protected from cold and stuff, and he has trouble sleeping in strange places...:

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:...I should really ask him: Savil pulls Vanyel into the link as well. :Van, ke'chara, would you prefer to sleep like you are now, with Lucy, or go inside?: 

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:With Lucy: His response is immediate. :Um, but if Lucy needs to go human-shape to help you here, I can...hide somewhere else. For a bit: 

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Just to Savil: :If someone's showing you the spot I could probably follow invisibly even if I didn't show up looking human to follow overtly.:

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:Oh. Hmm. That'd work for tonight. I already told Vanissa that my travel-companions weren't joining us after all, it seemed like you were busy. Would you bring Van along, then?: 

Pause. :Vanissa asked after him. I, er, pretended I saw a distracting bird. I think she would find it pretty meaningful to talk to him, but I'm guessing you think that's not a good idea: 

 

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:I really don't. It doesn't matter if I bring Van along, I can keep his ears stoppered so it doesn't super matter where we collectively are unless we go somewhere it doesn't smell like ash at all.:

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:Then let's get it over with?: 

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:Yeah.:

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Vanyel can feel that they're moving again, but not much else, there might be more of a brimstone odour on the air but it's hard to tell. He doesn't have to think about it. He can think about how Lucy is warm and tentacles are very good for snuggling really. 

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Vanissa says a few asides to Savil, but then falls silent as they move out, past the remaining splintered trunks, past the last few charred stumps, past the place where the rocks and contours of the land have any definition at all. At the centre is an expanse of glassy, slagged black stone, occasionally discoloured by deposits of ash turned to mud by rain and baked dry again. 

Vanissa keeps walking. For at least a quarter mile. 

"This is about the centre, we think," she says, her voice toneless. There's a tumbled pile of loose stones – no, bricks. "Reckon was the doorway of that old cottage where they–" her voice falters, breaks, "w-where they tried to hide. They said the Gate held it together." She bows her head. 

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Lucy's tentacles are SO GOOD for snuggles and she is going to dig up THIS ENTIRE PLACE IF THAT'S WHAT IT TAKES. Hopefully the urn means it won't be necessary, but now she knows where the place is. 

:I wish I could tell her I was going to fix it,: she tells Savil. 

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:I know: Savil blinks, dabs at her eyes. :Have you seen everything you have to?: 

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:Yeah. And I have a good sense of direction, if I need to be here again I can do that without bringing anyone with trauma about it.:

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Then Savil can briefly rest her hand on Vanissa's shoulder, she's no good at comforting people but she has to at least try, and then they can troop back, toward slightly less destruction. The sun is setting at their backs. For a while, if they glance back, the sheet of glassed stone will gleam like gold. By the time they reach the keep, it's dusk.

Vanissa drags her sleeve over her face. "I'll show you the graveyard tomorrow, Herald Savil. If you don't mind. It's...hard, going out there." A damp chuckle. "And, feels damned disrespectful digging up a grave in the dark. Come in and have something to eat?" 

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It is SO FRUSTRATING how humans need to sleep at night. This could be done so much sooner otherwise! 

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:What's happening now?: Vanyel sends. He can't tell if it's dark but it must be late, he's starting to feel sleepy. Maybe he'll even be able to actually sleep if Lucy sings some more. 

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:Things are done happening and it's late. I'm gonna go find somewhere isolated and sing some more.: 

Lucy suits action to word and starts heading away from the keep, mulling over whether something sad like Danny Boy would be an excellent or a terrible idea. 

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Yfandes follows them, if Lucy will move slowly enough for her to keep up. 

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Lucy will super do that. 

She settles down amongst the less-burned of the trees, shaking the limbs of the nearest so Yfandes can see where she is, and splits the difference with Loch Lomond. 

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Vanyel still doesn't fall asleep right away, it's hard to ignore the faint smell of burnt-ness even if he's maybe imagining it now, but he's very tired and Yfandes is in his mind and there's pretty much nothing that exists in his world that can harm Lucy. He dozes off eventually. At which point he will probably stay asleep until whenever Lucy starts moving again. 

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Lucy is pretty much going to stay Right Where She Is snuggling Herald and Companion until Savil tells her it's time to get moving again or noon or something. 

She sings softly throughout the night. 

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Savil contacts her a couple of candlemarks after sunrise. :Lucy? Where are you? We're eating breakfast, but Vanissa offered to - go do it - after that. How fast can you get here?: 

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:Fast, I'm just a little ways off in the forest so I could sing without being heard,: Lucy reports, shaking Yfandes slightly to wake her and lumbering to her many feet. 

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:...Lucy?: Vanyel is half-awake but still pretty groggy, not quite remembering where they are. :What...?: 

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:Unspecified stuff is happening, don't worry about it.:

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He can't manage to completely not-think about it, with the scorched-brimstone smell getting stronger, but he can focus on the snuggly tentacles and Yfandes' presence instead. 

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Savil is already out on the porch with Vanissa when Lucy arrives, and indicates to Vanissa that she's ready to go. They get up, and start walking around the side of the keep

...There's a courtyard out back, an oasis from the devastation around, the view of the partially-burned forest on the other side blocked by a barn wall. The barn looks partially rebuilt but in another year when the wood's properly weathered it might not be so obvious. 

There's a fountain. A garden, carefully tended. Clover on either side of the path. Even a couple of intact apple trees, bearing tiny green unripe fruit. 

Past it, the family graveyard is surrounded by a short stone wall. The gravestones are simple, just etched with names and dates. "This one," Vanissa says, and then stands there, like she can't bring herself to move. 

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Oh noooooo. 

:Is there any way you can convince her she doesn't need to be here for this part. I could dig that up quickly and then you two wouldn't have to be here as long,: Lucy suggests quietly to Savil. 

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:I can do it with magic too, but I'm sure you're even faster: Savil turns to Vanissa, solemn; the obvious tension in her mindvoice doesn't show much in her face. "Vanissa, I would understand if you would rather not watch me dig up your cousin's grave. I can do it with magic – don't need the help. It might be an unnerving sight for you though. If you would rather wait on the porch...?" 

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Vanissa waffles for a while, but finally nods. "Don't know why I'm being sentimental. It's just ashes. Remembrances for the living, you know – he doesn't care. And if it'll help your research and the Kingdom..." She shakes her head. "I'm being silly, I know, but, yes, why don't you go ahead and I'll wait around the front." 

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Once Vanissa is gone, a small handful of Lucy's tentacles plunge into the earth, feeling gently around for the urn. 

She is being so exquisitely careful not to move in a way that would suggest to Van what's going on. 

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Vanyel has been successfully failing to track what the possible things are that they could be doing; there's probably something important and it would probably be awful to think about but he doesn't even have clues so he can't. 

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The urn isn't buried that deep, only two feet or so under the sod. It's about as big as a man's head. When it comes out of the earth, it proves to be plain, unglazed pottery; it doesn't look like a burial urn at all, more like something that might've originally be intended to store flour or oil. 

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But it's sealed, and stands a good chance of containing significant quantities of Tylendel. 

:Got it. Uh, you should carry it, if I tuck it away like I'm hiding Vanyel our host might have questions.:

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Savil can take the urn and carry it. It gets dirt on her Whites, and she's obviously trying to avoid looking at the weight in her arms. :Um, can you put the dirt and grass back so it looks pretty?: 

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:Yeah, I can do that.: She puts the clods of dirt that have grass on them grass-side up in their proper places and smooths everything out. :I can take that when she's not looking. I'll want to have it hidden before we leave, anyway, I don't think Van having to engage with its existence would help anything.:

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:No. As much as graves and funerals are supposed to be good for grieving – he did miss the funeral – I really doubt it would help anything here: 

Savil carries the urn out around the corner, dips her chin to Vanissa. "Thank you. So much. I deeply appreciate your willingness to do this."

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"No, of course," and then Vanissa says some other words about how she's very willing to help a Herald, and eventually she asks if Savil needs anything else or if she wants to stay for a drink before she leaves. 

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:I do need a drink, badly: Savil admits to Lucy, :but...probably better not to dally here?:

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:Howabout you give me the urn and go have a drink while I hide it in the rolled-up bearskin.:

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:I'm going to at least make it look like I'm putting it in my saddlebags, she's still kind of watching me: 

"A drink would be lovely. Just a moment, Vanissa." Kellan's nearby and Savil ducks around so she's on the other side, and starts fiddling aimlessly with the saddlebag while waiting for Lucy to slip around. 

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Lucy slips around and takes the urn and coils tentacles around it to hide it from view. 

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Then Savil will go sit inside with Vanissa – out of sight of the burned land – and have a cup of wine. Maybe two. And talk about subjects that are definitely not graves or fires or dead cousins/students. 

She cuts it short at a candlemark, though, and says her goodbyes and gets up into Kellan's saddle. :Lucy, let's get far away from this place: 

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:Yeah, let's.: 

The urn is by this point well-hidden among the twins' possessions; Lucy is quite happy to leave as fast as the Companions care to go. 

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They need to be a bit careful on the narrow dirt path, but the Companions are a lot tougher than normal horses and Yfandes wants Vanyel somewhere else yesterday and they're going to get as close as they can safely manage to a gallop, until they reach the main road, at which they don't have to be nearly as careful. 

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Eventually, once they're quite a ways away, Lucy takes her tentacles away from Vanyel's ears and says, "It's safe to come out now." 

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:Um. Can I have a minute: He takes about thirty seconds and then uncurls and tries to poke his head out. :All right can I get down, I want to see Yfandes: 

Yfandes is delighted to see him, and they can stop by the side of the road for a while so that Vanyel can hug her and bury his face in her mane and maybe cry some of the tears he's been holding in for the last he-isn't-even-really-sure-how-long. 

"We can keep going," he says finally. "Lucy, thank you for doing that. I want to ride Yfandes now though." 

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"Yeah, 'course. I'm glad I could help."

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The Companions want to slow down a bit now, but they're still on track to reach the next town comfortably before sundown. From here, Savil says, they can be back in Haven in a week. Or less, if the Companions push the pace. She had originally been thinking they would take it slower, that she could treat it as a sort of internship circuit, introduce Van to more of a Herald's work, but...given the givens, she would rather they get home fast. 

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"Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. I can set up a laboratory in Haven?"

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"I don't think that should be any trouble, but what kind of setup exactly do you need?" 

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"I need glassware, and salt, and..." she lists a handful of different chemicals, "but I can distill those from a few different kinds of plant if they're not available raw."

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Glassware is fine – it's something mages can make, actually, though it's hardly worth doing that in normal circumstances. Salt, easy. Savil knows some of the chemicals but not others. "How much space do you need?" 

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Vanyel is going to ride ahead, for a bit, because he's not sure he actually wants to hear all the details. 

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"I can make do with just a workbench if I have to, but it'll be easier if I have a larger table to spread things out on so I don't have to put everything away when I'm not actively using it. And the chemicals can cause fumes--they're not harmful, but they smell, not as bad as the dead wyrsa but enough that it's better if the room is well-ventilated to the outside and not to the rest of the indoors. And I need a place to make a fire."

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Savil gets a slightly nauseated look but quickly controls it. "No, none of that should be any trouble." 

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"It's nowhere near as bad as the dead wyrsa," she assures Savil. "--Should I just stop mentioning them though."

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"I would slightly prefer that." Savil makes a face. "Also hearing about chemicals being poured on my dead trainee's ashes is...pretty weird...but that's not really a sensible objection." 

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"That's not exactly how it would work, mostly. Um, I'll also need water, but I thought it probably went without saying that water would be available wherever."

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Water shouldn't be a problem – if it needs to be perfectly pure, Savil can do that, but needs to know that. 

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Weeeell, it does but it doesn't, Lucy knows a spell to remove the impurities from water so it's fine if it doesn't come to her perfectly pure. 

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That seems fine then. 

They reach the town before sundown, and it has an inn, but Vanyel looks at the room available and then asks politely if he can sleep somewhere in the woods with Lucy holding him in her tentacles, that was actually better and it means Yfandes could be nearby. 

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Lucy is totally fine with this! Cuddles are always good.

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Then Vanyel will sleep that way every night, and Savil and Wilbur can have the rooms and beds. Given that, Savil mostly stops at Heralds' Waystations – very simple cabins with some food and supplies cached away, not big enough to sleep their whole party but comfortable enough for her and Wilbur. 

Yfandes pushes them not to ride too late each day, and Vanyel is sleeping in a lot more with the new arrangement, so it's not until the sixth day that they reach the main road close to Haven. It's finally busy enough that it isn't really feasible for Lucy to run in her big invisible form and switch back or hide when people come; the road is packed with people constantly. 

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Lucy isn't thrilled by the slowdown, but :I did kind of miss spending a lot of time in human form. I prefer it, honestly, when there isn't a strong reason not to,: she admits. :...I like feeling pretty.:

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She does get quite a few wolf-whistles as they walk. Wilbur gets...a different flavour of whistle. Savil points it out when the city walls come into view in the distance. 

(They're already sort of in Haven, extended; the area around them is now more dwellings than fields, though it's still going to look very rustic and medieval to Lucy and Wilbur's eyes.) 

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They are so close to fixing the thing. Lucy clasps her hands behind her back tightly enough to make the knuckles go white and does not chatter excitedly about anything that would set Van off. Soon the problem will be solved. 

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They reach the outer walls. Vanyel is stiff and silent and doesn't seem at all happy to be where he is, though there's anticipation there as well. 

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Even if this place is not great for him she cannot do what she did in the Frelennye lands, both because she cannot be huge and invisible here and because she is going to be busy solving the problem instead of simply meliorating it. 

You know what she can do, though? She can sing!

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Vanyel doesn't understand the words, of course, but Lucy is a pretty good singer in human form as well and the tune is interesting and he can pay attention to that instead of the city. He's only really been this way once; it was when he first arrived in Haven, a disappointment to his father, sent away so that his aunt (who, at the time, he thought would be exactly like Father) in order to make a man of him. And then– no don't think about it now, think about the song, he can try to pick up the tune and then hum softly along in harmony. That takes enough of his attention that there's isn't room to ruminate. 

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The region between the outer and inner walls is loud, crowded, and stinky. It's not filthy, there's some attempt at sanitation – no chamberpots emptied out windows – but there is horse-dung on the road, and then just the smell of not-especially-clean people. They pass a market-square, stallholders shouting about their wares. There's a fountain which is quite pretty save for the pigeon-shit all over the stone.

They reach the inner Palace walls. The blue-uniformed Guard at the gate recognizes Savil, bows to her, and waves them through. 

Inside is quieter and cleaner, though there's still a decent amount of traffic. Lots of open green spaces, gardens, ponds. In the distance, low stone buildings. 

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"We're almost there," Savil says quietly. "Sounds like Lancir is coming out to meet us – er, Lancir is the Queen's Own. Second-in-command to Elspeth." 

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"Is there anything we should know? About--protocol, things like that."

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"Hmm. Nothing obvious that I can explain quickly. The two of you are fine at being courteous, and he knows you're from another world. I'll Mindspeak you privately if something seems important?" 

They turn off onto a smaller, less-trafficked path, and soon reach a low, ancient-looking stone building, surrounded by especially lush and carefully-tended gardens. It's clean and peaceful and beautiful. Vanyel looks even more tense now. 

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"Savil!" There's a man waiting in front of the double oak doors. He looks older than Savil, grey-haired and lined, but still strong, standing with his hand on the mane of a tall, majestic-looking white stallion whose blue eyes hold the same intelligence as Savil and Vanyel's Companions, and...something more, somehow he seems brighter than reality. "Vanyel. It's wonderful to have both of you home."

His eyes turn to Lucy and Wilbur, blue and piercing. "And our guests from another world. How incredible. I'm Herald-Mage Lancir – it's an honour to meet both of you." 

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"It's an honor," Lucy says nervously, curtseying. 

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Wilbur inclines his head. 

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Lancir nods deeply to both of them, repeats their names. He hugs Savil once she's down from her Companion. Vanyel is hanging onto Yfandes' mane, looking incredibly not in the mood to be hugged; Lancir does not attempt it. 

"I apologize that I haven't had time to arrange permanent quarters for any of you," he says. "I have guest rooms arranged for the next week and we'll figure something out, hopefully sooner. I assume you'll want to get settled first, but – Lucy, Wilbur, I'd like to meet with you to discuss certain matters tonight. Privately. Savil, I want to speak with you as well, afterward." 

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"...Okay. Um, privately like separately or privately like both of us but nobody else?"

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"The two of you together is fine. I will likely want to meet with you both and Savil as well," sideways glance at Vanyel who is very deliberately not paying attention, "but we're going to be running out of candlemarks in the day so that seems best left to the morning. I'll show you to the guest rooms?" He starts walking.

The Companions can peel off and make their own way to the stables; usually Heralds will do everything to take care of their own Companions, but it's been a long day and Savil and Vanyel are both pretty tired and could use a break. 

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"...Okay." 

The twins follow. 

Lucy is not entirely thrilled about going off with this person she doesn't know, and she can tell Wilbur isn't either, but Savil and Vanyel seem to trust him, so, okay. 

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Maybe Savil can tell she isn't thrilled. She reaches out with Mindspeech. :I think it's all right. Lancir is a friend of mine, we go way back. I don't know why he wants to speak to you two without me first, but I'm quite sure he means well: 

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They get to the wing, and Lancir shows them their rooms – they each get a room to themselves, conveniently all four in a row. "I'll be back in a couple of candlemarks," he says. "Lucy, Wilbur, Savil can show you around to the bathhouse and dining hall, if that's all right?" He heads off, apparently in something of a hurry. 

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...Okay. 

"So when everything's explained, he'll be onboard?" she asks Savil quietly. 

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"I hope so. It's not like we've had a chance to discuss in detail, but–" she glances over to make sure that Vanyel has disappeared into his room, "gods, he's a Mindhealer, he knows what this did to Van. I think if there's any chance at all of fixing it then he'll be fully behind it." 

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"If he isn't, I'm not gonna let that stop me." 

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"...I understand." Savil stands there for a moment, then reaches out and briefly squeezes Lucy's hand, then ducks into her own room. 

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They are shown the bathhouse and the dining hall, and eat food, and eventually it comes time to privately meet with Lancir. 

At no point during any of this does Wilbur let the bearskin bundle out of his sight. He puts it down on the floor while eating, but picks it up again promptly afterwards and doesn't otherwise let go of it. 

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Lancir comes to collect them from their rooms and leads them through the grounds, which look quite pretty in the slanting late-afternoon light, and over to an even older-looking building. The office he brings them to is pretty messy; he has to move a pile of books off a chair for Lucy. (There isn't a chair that will comfortably fit Wilbur.) 

"Sorry about the clutter," he says. "This is my private office, we're less likely to be interrupted, but, er, I don't keep it as tidy. Anyway. You're from another world, huh? Before we talk about anything else, I'm curious to hear how you ended up here and why. Savil didn't really say." 

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"Oh, there were some cultists," Lucy says, waving a hand. "Doing cult things. I dunno exactly what they were trying to do specifically but it was something to the tune of summoning something whose presence would be awfully disruptive to life on the planet. So we intervened, and I guess the way we messed stuff up resulted in us being sent somewhere instead of something being brought where we were. Uh, it probably latched onto us because our father is the same general kind of thing as whatever they were trying to summon. Might even have been him, although probably not, there's a lot." 

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Startled look. "...How exactly did a summonable being, whose presence would disrupt life on the planet, become your father?" 

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"Uh, there's this ritual you can use to sort of partially summon him, such that things happen that result in pregnancy. I have no idea if we have any living half-siblings but we must've at some point."

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"For obvious reasons, neither of us were particularly interested in the details."

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"I spent a lot of time with nothing better to do than read and reread every book of magic we had, so I actually know the ritual well enough that I could teach it to someone if I wanted, but for even more obvious reasons I'm never gonna use it and I'd have to trust and like someone an awful lot to do that even if they wanted it." 

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Lancir looks vaguely disturbed, though he's controlling his expression. "I see. Do you think these beings would even be summonable to our world? They sound...something like gods, but certainly not our gods." 

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"I have no idea. And--well, they often get cults built up around them, so 'gods' isn't a bad word, but I don't like to be the first to use it, partly because it has implications of moral valence that I really don't believe apply and partly because announcing myself as a demigoddess sounds so self-aggrandizing." 

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"That's fair." Lancir pauses for a bit, like he's regaining his track of thought. "I, er, did want to ask. I can't help noticing that you read as something very nonhuman to my mage-senses. Savil tells me that Mindspeech works and is how you were first able to communicate, but I have another Mind-Gift that comes with Sight. Would it be all right if I take a look? I'm rather curious how, well, differently-shaped your minds are from ordinary human ones." 

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"...I can't say I'm not also curious. Sure." 

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"If you still want to look at me after Lucy, then alright." 

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"All right. Lucy first. I don't know if you'll feel anything – if you do, it should be subtle, all I'm doing is looking." Lancir leans forward in his chair, and his eyes go out of focus. 

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Lucy's mind is not a house, as he would categorize such things. 

Lucy's mind is a forest, a single clonal colony of trees, stripped of soil, the interconnected root system laid bare even as the leaves tremble in the nonexistent breeze. Despite the lack of soil, there are other traces of not-tree things--here a nest constructed of twigs and feather down, there a hole bored in a tree-trunk, over there a pattern of scarring on the trunk where a deer might have scraped its antlers. 

Many of the trunks have scars where branches have broken off. The scars look an awful lot like eyes. 

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Lancir lurches back in his chair. 

His first instinct is that there's no way he's looking at a mind at all, but...no, it is, the pattern is there...it's not a pattern he can interpret at all, but nonetheless. 

He Looks for a little while longer, and then releases it, and takes a deep breath, mostly recovering his composure. "I...see," he says, a little shaky. "Your mind does resemble what I might expect from a being who is half...not god, but, some type of powerful otherworldly being in any case." He tries his best to offer a description. It's hard to convey in words, sometimes. 

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"Oh! I think I recognize that--it's a kind of tree we have in my world, called an aspen or a trembling aspen--for the way the leaves behave. That's what I'm guessing off of, anyway." 

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"...How odd. It's not a tree recognized." Lancir frowns for a bit and then turns to Wilbur. "Were you still interested?" 

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"Why not." 

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Then Lancir will have a look. He does it with more trepidation, this time. 

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Wilbur's mind is a tower of earth and other materials, interwebbed with a complex system of tunnels and shafts and chambers. 

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It's...not really less alien, but it is less overwhelming, somehow, maybe just because he's more used to it. Again, he does his best to repeat the description to Wilbur, then sits back in his chair and re-settles himself. 

"All right. Coming to the point. The report that my Companion, Taver, got via Savil's Companion wasn't detailed, and earlier didn't seem like the time to press, but - you have resurrection magic from your world and you think that it'll work here and that you can resurrect Herald-Trainee Tylendel Frelennye and have, er, obtained remains in order to do so. Is that right?"   

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"Yes, that's right." 

(She does not say it challengingly. There is no point in picking a fight until and unless he makes it necessary.)

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Something resembling a sigh. "And you're sure that this will work? How does it work, may I ask?" 

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"I don't see any reason why it wouldn't. I've done a little other magic here, to test, and that works. What I do is I render the remains, through a complicated alchemical process, into brightly-colored dust, and then say an incantation, and the dust turns into an alive person. Also I can cheat some because the incantation invokes Yog-Sothoth, and it's Yog-Sothoth who's our father. There's no personal connection, on account of our never having existed on the same plane, but the magical connection is extremely useful."

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Nod. Silence. 

"I hate to ask," Lancir says finally, "but...does this ritual potentially give Yog-Sothoth any other kind of access to our plane? And, er, is Yog-Sothoth the sort of entity that, if I knew all the facts, I would want to have access to our plane?" 

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"To the best of my knowledge, which is much better than the vast majority of other people's, Yog-Sothoth does not give a shit about this, my original, or any other conventionally material plane. Yog-Sothoth is a being with an intelligence that is completely, fundamentally alien from humanity's. If Yog-Sothoth has ever taken any action with regards to humanity whatsoever I've never heard of it, and I've heard lots of accusatory rumors that definitely aren't even true. Now, if it was C'thulhu, that might be another matter, but I am extremely confident that nothing I'm liable to do is going to give C'thulhu any form of access to this plane." 

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Lancir looks...slightly reassured. Maybe. Sort of. "What is C'thulhu?" 

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"C'thulhu is...another being who could be called a 'god' insofar as he has worshippers and magical power--in fact, there are a lot more C'thulhu cultists than Yog-Sothoth ones--but he's a lot closer to our reality than Yog-Sothoth is, and is capable of manifesting physically without bringing forth some sort of cataclysm. Not...immediately, at least. I'm not sure what C'thulhu wants, but it clearly does give a shit about humanity in some way and I'm not entirely comfortable with that. Anyway, C'thulhu is bound to a sunken city called R'lyeh, which rises from the sea when 'the stars are right,' which refers to some astronomical arrangement but I'm not sure what, I know a lot less about C'thulhu than I do about Yog-Sothoth. He can be unbound if people reach the island while it's above water, but so far every time that's happened someone's managed to put him back before anything too destructive could happen. If I wanted to give C'thulhu access to this plane, which I don't, I'd have to wait for R'lyeh to rise again, find it, unbind C'thulhu, and then bring him here. Which, in addition to being very hard to do by accident, I don't actually at this time know how to go back and forth."

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Nod. "Interesting. And Yog-Sothoth – do you know why it's possible to call on Their, or Its, power, to do things like...conceive people like you and your brother, or raise the dead? If Yog-Sothoth doesn't even care about any material plane, why is it possible to summon even a tiny fraction of Its power?" 

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"I think it might be a little bit like mosquitos drinking people's blood, except that Yog-Sothoth is a lot more bigger than people than people are than mosquitos, and also drawing magic from different entities doesn't transmit diseases between them." 

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"What an analogy." He doesn't seem to know whether to be impressed or nauseated. "If the ritual were to go wrong in some way. How could that look? For example, is it theoretically possible that instead of the resurrection, you would get, er, some poor nearby woman pregnant with a child like yourself? Or any other possible misfires." 

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Snort. "No. The two rituals bear no similarity, at least not enough to possibly be bridged by accident and misstep. If the ritual were to go wrong somehow...it shouldn't happen, it's never happened to me, because, as I said, I can cheat, but it has been known to happen to more ordinary practitioners...he...might crave blood for a while. Uh. Animal blood is fine. But it does make people look more foodlike. I've been told it's unsettling to experience. Uh, if it went really really badly wrong, which, again, it shouldn't, but if it did, I might get...something...not entirely human--I don't mean like I'm not entirely human, I mean like, um, if you told a god to make a human and they had no idea what they were doing and also didn't realize humans were supposed to be people. But that's not going to happen! I never once messed up that badly, even when I was first learning. My teacher didn't either, it's actually kind of hard to mess up that badly by accident. Most of the ways you can possibly mess up either get you the blood thing or just an inert lump of dust that doesn't do anything." 

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Lancir looks deeply unnerved. It's a while before he licks his lips and speaks again. "What would you doIf it went badly wrong enough to give you a result that wasn't human. And...would it be him?" 

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"If I got the result that wasn't human, then no, it wouldn't be. And--in that case, you can reverse the incantation and turn them back into dust. Have I mentioned this result is really unlikely? We only know it exists because one of my teacher's ancestors who knew the technique was evil." 

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"Hmm." Lancir's expressions shifts through about a dozen different variants of 'unhappy' before he finally looks up. 

"I realize the upside," he says. "I've...seen what losing him did to Van's mind. If there's anything we can do to repair that, then I want that to happen. I'm absolutely not against your idea, here, I want you to understand that. But...people are going to have a lot of feelings about it, and I'm trying to think through how to handle that." 

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Nod. 

"I understand that actions have consequences, and suddenly introducing things like this is going to stir things up a lot. --In my world, magic is secret because people, human people I mean, humans are the vast majority on land, are pretty suspicious of it, like, it used to be that you could get executed for being caught doing magic, and these days it's mostly been hidden well enough for long enough that most people don't believe it exists and the stigma is starting to wear off, but raising the dead is--culturally fraught, because there are a lot more stories about turning corpses into horrible automata than there are about actual resurrection, and--it's so hard to help people like that. I want it to be different here, where magic is open and so much freer, and if there's anything I can do to help with that, I want to."

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Lancir nods. "I appreciate that you care. And what you're trying to do, truly. In our world - hmm. You're right, that magic is open, but it's still poorly understood by many people, including lords on our Council right here in Haven. And...change is hard in any world, I think. Also, and I absolutely hate that this is a factor at all, but...Tylendel isn't without controversy. You know what he did, I assume." 

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"I got the story from Savil. If there's some less-controversial person who would make a better face for the project and would be likely to agree and whose remains can be obtained quickly, the rendering process parallelizes well and the incantation doesn't take very long at all, it wouldn't unduly prolong Vanyel's suffering for Tylendel not to be the first." 

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"Huh, that's a possibility but not what I was thinking. I wanted to ask, how obvious is the process? How difficult would it be to conceal your work?" Lancir rubs his chin. "I am completely in agreement that I don't want to prolong Vanyel's suffering a day longer than we need to, but I think I need much longer than a few days to work out the political ramifications here." 

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"--I mean, unless you send me and Van and Yfandes to some kind of isolated house in the countryside, I assume you'll need the cooperation of more people than that to conceal the fact that he's, you know, around and existing and consuming a person's worth of food and stuff, but the process itself isn't terribly obvious, I mean it would be hard to conceal completely that something was happening but I'm not even starting from an intact corpse that I'd have to cremate first, I could easily pretend to be just some random alchemist doing random alchemy. Do you cremate people around here? On purpose, I mean, not as the inevitable consequence of large explosions. It might matter if I have to do anyone else, anyone more intact, and people could recognize what was happening. Not that I especially expect to run into another case as obviously and urgently mandatory."

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"No," Lancir says, absently. "There aren't any. I researched it. Van's the first person to survive a broken lifebond this long. Most people don't last candlemarks." He lifts his head. "Getting some of the other Heralds on board is fine. Though a house in the countryside might not be the worst idea, I...imagine they'd want some time together before they both have to be Heralds. It's the Council I'm concerned about." 

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"I have literally never engaged with actual politics before in my life, so I don't know how much help I can be there, but if it would be convenient to parade me in front of them in a pretty dress and not use any metaphors involving bugs or diseases or eating things so I can be a pretty teenage girl who is friendly and sweet and harmless-looking, I can do that." 

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Lancir seems a bit nonplussed, but in a positive-surprised way. "I'll keep that offer in mind. Anyway. I'll find out what you need to get started in a minute, but first - how is Vanyel coping? With this, er, news, and with...everything, I guess." He rubs the back of his neck. "You have to understand, I haven't really spoken to him since he left for k'Treva eight months ago." 

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"...Terrified of the idea of hoping and having the hope taken away. I've been doing everything in my power to not make him engage with the situation more than necessary, he doesn't even know about the urn." 

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"The urn?" 

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"Vanissa scraped a bunch of the ash at the epicenter into an urn right after it happened."

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"Huh. I imagine that's quite helpful for your, er, process?" 

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"Oh yeah, otherwise I would've had to dig up a ton of black glass and run it through the purification process."

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He chuckles a bit. "Fair enough. So – I was going to try speaking with Vanyel tomorrow. In my capacity as a Mindhealer more than as Queen's Own. But I get the sense that however he's trying to cope now, it's going to change a lot if this works. And if he has been coping then I don't want to risk messing with that too much. So – how many days will this take you?" 

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"Two days on the low end, a week on the high end--you only have most of the chemicals I need in raw form, a lot of the uncertainty has to do with what I can get my hands on that has the remainder and how long it takes to extract what I need. And it would be longer if I had to sleep."

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Nod. "Do you think Van will be, er, stable for that length of time? I mean, you've been on the road longer than that, so..." 

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"I hope so. I was able to help some, then, and I'll be busy now. --I guess you could sing to him, Wilbur." 

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"My voice isn't as nice as yours, but I do still know music from our world. Alright."

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"So there's that. And he should be somewhere comfier than hard campground but where he can be right near Yfandes. My other form was good for that on the road but, again, I'll be busy." 

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"And there's Savil. Who's damned well earned a break – I can give her a week's leave, she deserves it anyway. She can spend time with him, I think that'll help a lot." He folds his hands in his lap. "And I'll save my energy for when I need to talk to both of them. I mean, if this works." It doesn't seem like he's doubting it nearly as much now, though. 

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"I'll make it work." 

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"...Tell me what you need." 

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She gives him the same list of glassware and chemicals and so on that she gave Savil. "--and technically I need purified water but it only takes a second to purify regular water with my magic so you don't actually need to worry about the purified part." 

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"Do you need all of these right at the beginning, or can you start without some? I can get you an alchemy-room to use by tomorrow morning, not sure I can get you everything on this list before then though." 

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"I won't need anything but," she lists off several chemicals used for the part where she refines the remains out of the miscellaneous cottage and wyrsa and other debris that got ashified at the same time, "for several hours after I begin, oh except also the water, I pretty much need water throughout, and then next," she names several more, "those get used mostly in sequence but some in parallel and also I can't predict exactly how fast each process will go, without knowing the heat of the fire I'll be working with and such, and then I definitely won't need," she names the remaining, significantly more than the first group but a little less than the second, "until morning the day after I start even if I start at the crack of dawn and everything goes as well as it possibly can." 

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Lancir scrawls some notes. "I'll keep that in mind when I start hunting these down for you. Come find me in this offie whenever you're ready to start tomorrow morning?" He bows his head for a moment. "And, godspeed." 

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"Thank you." 

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"–Oh, wait!" Lancir calls to them just before they reach the door. "I - damn it, I just thought of something. Which I should've thought of right away." He drags a hand down his face, looking suddenly weary. "You know why the boy, er, did what he did, right? He had a Companion. She died. I - well, bringing him back is certainly a wonderful gift to Vanyel, and all of us, but if he comes back without Gala, he's not going to have an easy time of it." 

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"--What happened to her?"

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"...They were fighting, she was trying to hold off the wyrsa – to back up, they were out at the holding and Van was..." he stops again, "hmm, actually I'm not sure how far I should back up. Do you know the story with Tylendel's twin, Staven?" 

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"--Tylendel has a twin?"

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Lancir bows his head for a moment. Takes a slow, deep breath. "...Right, you probably didn't get the full sequence in order, did you? It's a pretty raw subject for Savil too, not just Van. Er, probably sit back down, it's not a quick story." 

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She sits back down. "It seemed like asking a lot of questions could wait until the most acute problem was fixed and it would maybe hurt less."

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"I'm glad you didn't ask them," Lancir acknowledges. "But, I do think it might be important that you have full context going into this. So. The beginning of this tale is, Tylendel and Staven Frelennye were the only children of the Frelennye Lord Holder. Staven was older, and thus the heir. Tylendel was a mage - there's a story there as well, short version is that he had a rough time of it for a few years, uncontrolled Gifts - and was Chosen and came to Haven. But meanwhile, there'd been tensions for years with the Leshara family, the holding next to the Frelennyes. About a year before the incident, there was a death on the Leshara side, in a cattle raid, and the feud escalated. The twins' father died, perhaps of natural causes but it was a little suspicious, and Steven inherited, at age seventeen. Then their mother died, and the Lesharas for sure were involved there. Staven was livid about it. As was Tylendel. Understandably." 

Lancir pauses for a while, rubbing his chin. 

"Then, shortly after Van came to Haven and he and Tylendel met," he goes on finally, "there was another escalation. One of the Leshara cousins hired a foreign mage. Staven...was killed in an ambush. At which point we all found out that he and Tylendel had shared a twin bond, sort of like a lifebond or Companion-bond. Tylendel was distraught. And ready to storm out there to enact his revenge. I...talked him out of that. And then..." 

He bows his head. "And then...I messed up. Along with a crew of Heralds and the Guard to find the damned mage, I sent 'Lendel and Van out there with Savil to sort out the inheritance situation. Tylendel couldn't inherit, as a prospective Herald, but I figured he could mediate, they all knew him." Lancir brings a hand to his temple. "But a lot of things went wrong." 

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Tears are trickling from the corners of her eyes. 

"I really wish," she says, through teeth clenched to prevent embarrassing noises, "that I had known that while we were digging up Frelennye graves anyway." 

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Wilbur does not put down the bearskin bundle but he is a creative fellow who can hug his sister anyway. 

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"...I know. I can understand why no one brought it up - or even thought of it, it's a painful subject." Lancir shakes himself a little. "Right. So the next thing that happened is that our little expedition failed to find the foreign mage-for-hire, we figured he'd left, but we were wrong. Van was kidnapped, held hostage. Savil went riding out to search for him, with Tylendel and her two other mage-trainees who'd insisted on coming along. They were attacked by wyrsa – the mage had them under his control, that's how Staven died."

Lancir pauses for another deep breath. It's clearly an emotional topic for him as well. 

"Tylendel could sense where Van was, through the bond. He and Gala broke off from Savil, found Van tied up in an old barn, managed to defeat the mage – god knows how, desperation I guess – grabbed Van and tried to get back to Savil. Ran into more wyrsa. The three of them ended up trapped in a ruined cottage, Tylendel and Gala were fighting, Van was...basically helpless. I should clarify that he wasn't Chosen at the time, yet, wasn't Gifted either. Anyway, Tylendel knew they were in trouble, Savil and the two students were still fighting for their lives a ways off, couldn't get to them in time, so... He started to attempt a Gate, a sort of magical doorway back to Haven. Drawing on Van's energy through the lifebond, he was far too exhausted to have done it otherwise." 

Another shaky pause. Lancir drags a hand over his face. 

"...Then Gala died," he says finally. "And 'Lendel, somehow, finished the Gate-spell. Held it long enough to shove Van through. He - he loved him, enough, to do that, I don't know how any human being could've held a Gate otherwise after losing a Companion-bond. But he didn't follow Van through. He turned around and called a Final Strike on - everything. And Van watched all of it happen." 

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Lucy is openly weeping by this point. Her hair is obscuring too much of Wilbur's face to get any information on his state.

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Lancir dabs at his eyes as well. His voice is thick. "Savil and her students nearly died, but they held it off. Savil was unconscious. Her trainee Mardic made it to the Gate, found it still up with Van on the other side, went through and tried to take it down before it killed him. The Gate-energy backlashed through Van, tore open all of his potential Gifts. He...somehow got up, stumbled off, made it to the river and, er, tried to drown himself. Yfandes got there in time, fished him out, Chose him. Everything was a mess, powerful uncontrolled Gifts, his channels were raw, he was in agonizing physical pain even aside from what the broken lifebond did to him. Eventually we thought to send him and Savil to k'Treva. Moondance was able to heal his Gifts so he could be trained. And then eventually Savil decided they were ready to come home, and you met them on the way." 

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She nods. Eventually her crying winds down enough for her to say, "If--if Tylendel died right by where Gala did, probably there's enough of her in the urn to be getting on with." 

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"I think she would've been basically right at his feet," Lancir agrees. "So, probably." A quick intake of breath. "...It won't be a problem, that the ashes are all mixed together?" 

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Headshake. "The magic knows what belonged to whom." 

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"That's something. If the lad gets Gala back, I...think he'll be all right." Lancir shakes his head. "Is he going to remember everything that happened up until his death?" 

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"My teacher's wife who died doesn't remember--um, the weapon that killed her was sorta like a crossbow but moreso and if you're hit in the head you die pretty much instantly, she says she doesn't remember getting shot but she does remember seeing his finger tighten on the trigger." 

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Nod. "So he may or may not remember anything indicating the Final Strike. There's – I assume there's a moment of intent beforehand, but I don't know how instant it is, for obvious reasons no one, er, remembers to report it. But he's going to remember the wyrsa, and the Gate, and...losing Gala...?" 

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"...Yeah. But if all goes well she'll be right there."

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"He's going to be so incredibly disoriented. Not that I think there's anything we can do about it, aside from Gala being there, and Van, and some other familiar faces." Lancir leans back in his chair. "I think that's actually everything, now. Unless you have questions for me?" 

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"I don't think so." 

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Then Lancir will wave them out of his office with a promise that he'll have a well-ventilated alchemy room and as many of the ingredients as he can procure by dawn.

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Yfandes is waiting outside the building. :Lucy, Wilbur – are you starting right now, or do you have a bit of time?: 

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"I'm starting in the morning, I have time."

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:I think Van would appreciate seeing you for a bit: Yfandes arches her neck. :He's...coping all right, mostly. Sort of. Finally having his own comfortable private space is really helpful. But - he knows you're about to be busy and he doesn't want to think about why but he will miss you: 

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"Okay. Um, there will be bits where there's nothing going on but things waiting to heat for the right amount of time or something like that, I can come see him then. I might smell a little weird though." 

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:That makes sense. I'll...have to judge at the time whether that's going to help. Anyway, he's in his room right now but I've suggested he could come out to the Companions' Field or the stable for a bit, if you have time to come: 

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Nod. "I have time." She heads in the indicated direction. 

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Vanyel is just coming down the path, head down and shoulders tense. He manages a weak smile when he sees Lucy.

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She immediately goes and hugs him. 

"Lancir has a whole different Mind-Gift for me to look weird in!" she reports. 

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Vanyel tenses even more. "Oh. Right. He's a Mindhealer." 

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Oops. "His thing is houses but I'm a forest. Wilbur's a, I'm not sure but I think it might be a termite mound."

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That seems to get Vanyel's interest enough to distract him from...whatever the upsetting part was. "A forest? What sort of forest?" 

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"Quaking aspen. It's this species of three where the leaves move oddly in the wind because of the way the stems attach to the tree branches." 

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"Huh. Neat." Vanyel finds a spot on the grass and sits down; Yfandes ambles over and settles next to him. He's quiet for a bit; he keeps glancing at Lucy and Wilbur and then look away. 

"...You're going to–" he starts, then puts his forehead down on his knees, and switches to Mindspeech. :You're going to try the thing. And you think it'll work: His mindvoice is tight, and somehow feels transparent and brittle, like spiderweb-cracked glass that might shatter at the slightest touch. 

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What can she even say to that, besides-- "Yes," she says aloud. 

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He curls up even tighter. :Lucy, I'm really, really scared. I don't even know why. It - would be good, if it works. I, just...: 

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"You just have a lot of feelings that you haven't been able to deal with on account of there being a giant hole in you." She sits down and hugs him again. 

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Vanyel seems to accept that, and doesn't say anything more, just huddles up against her, still tense but not quite as rigid as before.

:...Can I sleep in your tentacles again?: he sends finally, very tentative, like it's an onerous request that he's embarrassed to make. :Just for one night, before you, um, start?: 

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:Yeah.:

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Then Vanyel will take her up on it! He isn't sure where to go that would be private, he suggests in one of the wooded areas beside the river. Um if she can carry him there without looking please. Yfandes can hang out nearby and warn them if any humans come near, but probably no one will. 

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She will totally carry him there!

:I'll miss this too. You're my friend and I care about you a lot and I really like hugging you.:

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:You're a really good friend: Vanyel will curl up and close his eyes and do his best to fall asleep even though his insides are tangled up with a mix of anticipation and sheer terror and then embarrassment at being such a mess about it. It'll probably help if she sings again. 

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She sings Amazing Grace. 

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It’s a beautiful song and Vanyel sort of tries to stay awake to listen but he’s still asleep by the end.

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Good. That is exactly the result she was hoping for. 

She waits until the sun has finished rising in the sky before gently waking him. 

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As she's depositing him outside the guest room area, Savil appears. She looks harried and distracted. "...Oh, Lucy, Wilbur. Are you...?" Meaningful glance in the direction of the building with Lancir's office. 

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"Uh huh."

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Savil switches to private Mindspeech. :How did your talk with him last night go, then? Mine was...interesting: 

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:He wants to keep it a secret while he figures out politics. And our minds look really weird to Mindhealing Sight. And we're to start this morning. And it's a really good thing Gala's body was right at his feet and there'll probably be enough of her in the urn too.:

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Savil stops in her track. :Oh, gods, I did not think of Gala and all and I'm an idiot: She rubs her temples. :Honestly, I...think I was kind of not-thinking about the details. But that's really good: 

She makes a face. :My conversation was... Well, first he chewed me out for unilaterally deciding to dig up Tylendel's grave while passing it off as Heraldic Circle business. He pointed out that I am not very good at politics or tact and could easily have offended Vanissa badly: 

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:Speaking of which it would probably have been good if I had known Tylendel had a twin when we were digging up graves anyway. I'm a twin, I don't really wanna think about what losing Wilbur would be like. Um. I'm not mad at you. I knew you were traumatized and I was deliberately not asking questions. But I wish I'd known.:

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Another flinch. :I really wish I'd thought to tell you. Anyway. I told Lancir that I was aware that Vanissa's reaction could have been a lot worse, and that I didn't particularly want to wait for a more tactful person to ask, because, well, Van. He agreed that was fair. So I guess we're fine. I am glad I somehow managed not to horribly offend her although I'm not sure how, I really am untalented in that department: 

She reaches to take Van's hand. :Anyway, I'd best let you get to it: 

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:Yeah. See you later.: 

And with Van handled she turns back human and re-clothes herself and goes to find the promised lab setup. 

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Lancir meets the two of them out front, and he brings them to a room around the back of what he explains is the Healers' Collegium – the building that houses the lessons for students, not patients. It's meant to be used for alchemy-type work, and has its own door, not passing through any hallways, and very good ventilation to the outside. It does have a nice big long table. There isn't indoor running water, but he shows her the nearest pump outside, less than ten yards from the door, and there's a bucket to transport water. And all the glassware she requested; Savil was up late making some of it, the rest is all just borrowed from existing Healing research. No one else should have any reason to use the room anyway, and he's had the dean of Healing mark it down as taken for the next week.  

He's found everything on their chemicals list that Lucy will need for the first day, and promises he's working on the rest. 

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"Thank you very much." 

And then she gets to work. 

The first step is to isolate the Tylendel-stuff and Gala-stuff from the rest of the ash. She fills the bucket, purifies the water, and fills several pieces of glassware partway full, then refills the bucket again just so she won't have to stop in the middle of something for more water. She carefully funnels the contents of the urn into a larger piece of glassware, then rinses the urn with purified water a few times to ensure she gets the maximum quantity of relevant ex-biomass. She stirs the container, evaluates the thickness of the current mixture, adds some more purified water, then sets it to heat. Then she washes the funnel, positions it over an empty piece of glassware, makes sure everything is stable, and then, carefully, over the funnel, bites her wrist open. 

Once the glassware is full of ichor, she allows her wrist to scab over, then washes the funnel again. She checks the temperature of the water-and-ash mixture and takes it off the fire. She dips her finger in a beaker of purified water and draws a sigil on the table, then sets the mixture down on top of the sigil. She lets it cool like that for a moment while she measures out a handful of the first chemical, then pours it into the beaker. The contents of the beaker immediately turn a bright red and fwoomf out a ring of smoke in the same color. She nods and sets it over the fire as she measures out and mixes more dry ingredients and the beaker slowly changes to a dark purple. When it darkens so much it's almost black, she takes it off, places it over another water sigil, adds one of the mixture piles, stirs it some more, lets it sit for a while, and then pours it through a filter into another piece of glassware, discarding the sludge left on the filter. 

She repeats variations on these steps for several hours, until finally, shortly before noon, she smiles triumphantly and puts what's left on the filter in another piece of glassware, adds some more water, and sets them both on the fire. She stretches, goes out to the pump to wash, and goes looking for lunch. 

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Neither Savil nor Vanyel are there. When she gets back, though, Lancir is waiting inside. "Sorry, didn't want to interrupt. I have the rest of what you wanted." Some of it is plants that have the chemicals rather than the chemicals themselves in pure form. 

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"Thank you!" 

And she gets back to work. 

Now, though, while something is on the fire, or cooling, or otherwise having-to-wait, she chops plants and soaks them and dries them and grinds them and arranges them into complicated arrays, then stabs a finger in the center, causing parts of the dust to fly inwards towards her finger. 

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Night falls, and she works by firelight. The two vessels containing significant quantities of the earthly remains of Tylendel and Gala are poked and prodded, poured in and poured out, sigils drawn on and under. On several occasions she pours quantities of ichor into them and swirls them around until the colors settle. She boils off water and goes out for more. She sweeps the dust of removed-water-impurities and the parts of the plants that are not the chemicals she needs into the wastebasket beside the table. It gets fuller and fuller. She barely notices when the sun rises. 

Midmorning, after she's finished extracting the chemicals she needs from the plants she was given, she finds herself at loose ends while ichor-bolstered beakers simmer. 

:Yfandes? I'm slightly at loose ends. Is this a good time?:

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:Oh? Now’s fine. We’re just in the gardens: She sends an image of a secluded bench behind lots of rosebushes, and a sense of the direction.

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Lucy dumps a bucket of water over herself to suppress the smell of alchemical fumes and heads over. 

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Vanyel is sitting with Yfandes. He isn’t crying right now but he clearly was at some point in the last hour. He doesn’t seem to notice Lucy’s approach. 

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She sits down next to him and hugs him. 

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He lets his head rest on her shoulder for a bit. 

:This is so stupid: he sends finally. :I can't DO anything. I...wasn't this much of a mess before, I swear, I could do magic and help people and...why can't I do anything now? Should be - good news - what you're working on. Why is everything worse: 

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:Because hope is scary.:

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He starts crying again. :I wish - I could handle scary things better: 

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:I mean, you do have a massive hole in you. I realize under most circumstances it might not be helpful to point that out because having a good reason doesn't solve the problem itself, but.: 

:We're on the last stretch. We got through all that travel and now it's just a couple more days. And you know what? No matter how much the next couple days suck they will eventually be over.:

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:I'm trying to remember that. And... Thank you: And Vanyel will hang onto her for as long as she has before she needs to back and resume her work. 

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That will be about half an hour, and then she kisses him on the top of the head and hurries off to attend to her beakers before something boils over. 

She continues to measure and pour and mix and draw sigils out of water all over the place. She snatches another hour in the afternoon to go hug Vanyel. 

Night falls, and she keeps working, pacing and humming and reading when she has a little spare time because Vanyel is asleep and there is nothing she can do about him. 

The sun rises, and the colors in the beakers have begun to diverge. One is consistently a sort of bluish color, and the other one maintains various shades of red. 

The sun ascends, and Lucy adds the last of the ichor, and watches. 

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The sun crests the apex of the sky and finally, the last of the moisture in the two beakers boils off, leaving one a sparkling sapphire blue and the other a deep, brilliant carmine. 

Lucy shrieks in victory, raising her fists in the air. 

:You guys! I DID IT!!!: she calls to Vanyel, Savil, Yfandes and Kellan. :I haven't said the incantation, I don't think they ought to wake up in a laboratory with just me, but I'll be right over!!!: 

She stoppers the beakers carefully, then hikes her skirts up and runs towards the relevant parties as fast as her biped form will take her. 

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By the time she reaches the guest-rooms building, they're all out front together, Savil in the lead, holding Vanyel's arm. He seems like he might fall down without it. 

:On reflection: Savil sends, :I think we'd better do this in a Work Room with shields. And wait for Lancir. If he, er, panics – if either of them do, honestly – that's a lot of Gifts that could get thrown around. Follow me: 

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Lancir catches up with them just before they reach another building. He exchanges a look with Savil, tries to catch Vanyel's gaze but Vanyel is busy staring at the ground.

They go in. 

"...I don't know what's left to do," Lancir says. His voice is very slightly shaky. "But, er, I think you can go ahead." 

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Lucy puts down the beakers and unstoppers them, takes a deep breath, and speaks. 

"Y'AI 'NG'NGAH,
YOG-SOTHOTH
H'EE—L'GEB
F'AI THRODOG
UAAAH"

Her voice takes on a booming, echoey quality not present in her normal speech, and no sooner has the final syllable left her lips than twin pillars of red and blue smoke emerge from the beakers. They quickly flow out entirely, leaving the beakers empty, onto the floor, where the blue one takes the shape of a horse and the red one the shape of a man. 

And in an instant the clouds of smoke are gone, replaced by living, breathing flesh. 

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Tylendel's eyes fly open. Where am I? An instant ago there was a Gate, he had done it, Van was on the other side, but Gala was dead and he remembers turning back, he - remembers what he was going to do - NO - but now it's all gone, the cottage is gone and the Gate is gone and he seems to be naked and...Gala...and...Van...?

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Vanyel sags to his knees. "Ashke..." He can't say any more than that one word. 

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Tylendel scrambles up and runs to him, it doesn't matter where he is, it doesn't matter who stopped him or how, none of it makes sense but Van is there and so everything is all right. 

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Lucy grins jubilantly and bounces. It's done, it's done, she's been waiting so long to get to it and it's done~

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And for maybe thirty glorious seconds, Tylendel is holding him and Vanyel can feel his heart beating and it's...it's all right, everything is all right, it doesn't hurt, it hasn't not hurt for eight months but it's over and now he can finally rest. 

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"...Van, ashke, where are we?" The confusion catches up, finally. Tylendel keeps a firm grip on Van's shoulders but looks around, his eyes landing on Savil, widening when he sees Lancir, then going to blank bemusement when he sees Lucy. "Van, I was - going to - I almost..." And now he's starting to look scared. "Gala died. I remember it. Van, I don't understand what's happening – where are we?" 

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"Uh, hi, I'm Lucy. You were dead. I fixed it. I can do that."

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"What? But, how..." Then Tylendel lets go of Vanyel and takes a step back and goes very still, the blood draining from his face and leaving his lips white. "I, I thought - I thought you stopped me. But I - no - I did it. Didn't I?"

He can't look at Vanyel. Can't bring himself to say it out loud. Or ask the most important question. How long has it been? 

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"'Lendel?" Vanyel can't manage to stand, or move, all he knows is that Tylendel was here and now he's over there and he doesn't understand what's wrong. 

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"Yeah, you, um, there's...a big crater...and has been for most of a year..."

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"But..." Tylendel fumbles blindly for Gala's neck – there's something wrong, he can feel their bond but it's...crooked, he can't find his balance. "A year - that can't..."

It has to be wrong. It can't be a true thing about the world that he...was gone...and left Van for that long – and now he's angry and he isn't even sure why, except that this stranger is talking to him like it's fine that he was dead, that he left behind nothing but a crater, it's impossible anyway people don't come back from the dead– "You're LYING!" 

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"I'm not. I'm sorry, I wish I was, but I'm not. --But I can fix it, like I fixed you and her--it's still not, not good, but. I'm sorry."

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...He knows she isn't lying. Already knew it, really, he remembers deciding to call down the Final Strike, not actually doing it but he remembers the choice.  

He remembers raising a Gate even after Gala was gone – a pang of cold terror, but she's not gone, she's right here – but, gods, he remembers finishing the Gate even in the brief moment when she...wasn't. That happened. (And it wasn't brief at all, it was almost a year, it only seems short to him because he...wasn't either.) He remembers holding the spell because Van had to survive, had to be all right, and - and he remembers turning away because in the end, after all of it, however much he loved Vanyel it wasn't enough and - and he can't take that back, he can't apologize, apologies are only words and how much can words weigh against that–

"I'm sorry," he says anyway, empty, pointless. "Van, I - you shouldn't - why aren't you angry?" Van is looking up at him with that helpless awful look that says I love you, I need you, and he shouldn't, he shouldn't look at Tylendel like that ever again, because Tylendel left.

It isn't forgivable. It can't be forgivable, surely the world would stop holding together if something like that could be forgiven. 

He backs away as far as he can, bumping into a stone wall, it's only then that he really notices he's indoors at all. "Van, I'm a monster, I – you have to stop, you can't - don't just look at me - just STOP!" 

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"You're not a monster, you made a bad impulsive decision when a hole had just been ripped in your brain. Everyone does that. --I mean, not everyone has a hole ripped in their brain, but lots of people do stupid impulsive things when they're hurting, and in the other case where someone had a hole ripped in their brain--" and then she stops because maybe telling Tylendel that Vanyel jumped in a river over his bad impulsive decision would not actually help.

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"'Lendel, ashke..." Vanyel can barely speak, he should at least be able to say words, why is he failing at that too. "I'm–" it's probably false that he's not angry, "I love you?" It comes out as a question and that's stupid too, it's the one thing in the world he's sure of. "Can you - just - please...?" He holds out his arms, helplessly, can't you please just hold me, but he can't even ask for that much. 

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"You fucked up. I fixed it. Is there damage still left to heal? Yes. Get to work healing it. Go snuggle your boyfriend." 

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Tylendel, back pressed to the wall, shakes his head slowly. "I can't. I can't fix it, I just...break everything..." He turns away. "You shouldn't have brought me back. You should've saved it for someone worth it." 

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"You idiot, do you know what a broken lifebond feels like? No? Neither do I. Vanyel does, and he's worth it, and whatever you may or may not be objectively worth, he wants you." 

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Tylendel sags down against the wall, his eyes filling with tears. "I'm sorry." 

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Vanyel finally manages to remember how to move. To stand up, even, and cross the room. "'Lendel, please – I don't want to say that I forgive you - or that I'm not angry, but...I missed you so much. Can we just, please, not talk about it right now. All I care about is that you're here." 

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"I–" Tylendel gives up on words, and just pulls Vanyel into his arm again, weeping. 

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Oh good. 

...

Lucy hugs Savil. 

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Savil is crying. She starts crying more when Lucy touches her. There's...kind of a lot of crying, going on. 

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"Well," Lancir says in a low voice, "that didn't go perfectly, but at least nobody threw any fireballs. I...figure we should leave them be for a bit." 

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"Yeah, probably." Crying seems like an extremely appropriate reaction to this situation. Unless Savil acts like she does not want hug, Lucy is going to continue to hug her. 

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Vanyel sobs and hangs onto Tylendel and sobs some more. Usually he would care about...dignity, or something, it's hard to remember what the concept even is. Tylendel is there and it's as though he didn't even realize how broken the entire world was without him, he couldn't look head-on at that chasm, but remembering the ghost of it now that it's gone is - bad enough that he's not sure he's ever going to stop crying. 

Eventually, though, it's not so much that he feels it any less desperately, but his body seems to run out of the will to manifest any emotions physically. He lifts his head from Tylendel's chest, remembering all at once that: his aunt and Lancir are both standing right there, Lucy is standing right there, Gala is curled up beside him and probably Yfandes wants to see her. Oh and also Tylendel is still naked. Vanyel hopes he isn't cold or anything.

"Lucy?" he croaks. "Thank you." 

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"I would super hug you right now but I'm not sure how Tylendel would feel about that. I'm really really happy I could do this." She beams at him. "--Sorry for calling you an idiot," she adds to Tylendel, "I was frustrated but that's a reason, not an excuse." 

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"You...should hug him," Tylendel whispers. "Not my right to stop that. He's your friend." It stings, that he's waking up naked in a Work Room a year later and Van has a friend who clearly cares so deeply about him and he...missed all of that. Because he wasn't there. Because he made the wrong stupid choice. It shouldn't hurt, he should be happy that Van had anything good at all during those months, but it does.

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Vanyel doesn't want to let go, but he stands and sort of pulls Tylendel to his feet along with him, and hugs Lucy. 

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Hugs. 

"I'm really glad I get to finally meet you. I've been looking forward to it," she tells Tylendel. "And, uh, if it makes you feel any more comfortable, I can shapeshift and my other form doesn't fit in clothes so I'm really used to incidental nudity." 

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"What."

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"I can shapeshift! And raise the dead! I'm from another world but I'm weird even there." 

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...All right, fine, he has questions but now really isn't the time – and Tylendel has just fully realized that Savil is there. He stumbles toward her, dragging Van along with him. "Savil, gods, I'm–"

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"Shh, don't say you're sorry," Savil says. "Not right now, ke'chara." She embraces him. "I missed you. It's good to have you back." 

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Lancir clears his throat. "Tylendel, would you like some clothes?" 

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"Oh, you brought some? Good, I was concerned there hadn't been enough time between finishing the alchemy part and everyone gathering here."

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"I had some warning while you grabbed Savil and Van. And we do need him dressed to go outside, ideally."

Then Lancir frowns. "It's not ideal to bring them to the guest-wing, lots of people around who, er, aren't briefed." He lowers his voice. "Savil – your old suite is available. How bad an idea does it seem to you to bring them back there? Advantage is that Mardic and Donni haven't left for their first circuit yet, and I did bring them in on it earlier today. They want to see him, of course. I think it would be good to have plenty of familiar faces nearby? On the other hand, I'm...not sure if it'll be hard for Van, being back there. Lucy - for context, Tylendel never went back after the incident, obviously, but Van did, his most recent time there was right after everything happened. Having Tylendel should help, of course, but...I don't know, could still be some painful memories there." 

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Nod. 

"--Tylendel, I'm sorry, I knew how upset Vanyel and Savil were about the whole thing so I was deliberately not asking questions while we were picking up enough of your ashes to do the resurrection with so I didn't know you had a twin until we were already all the way back here. I promise I'll get him as soon as I can but I don't know exactly how long that'll be." 

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Tylendel freezes. Stares at her. "You...can bring back Staven?" (It's still there, the empty place where Staven was, like a missing tooth, he has Gala and he has Vanyel and that's...enough, it's so much more than he deserves, really...but. Staven.)  

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"Yeah, it'll be way easier than bringing back you two was. Uh, the magic part, I mean, but I need the remains for it, so...logistically it'll be more tricky. I mean I needed it for you too but carrying around an urn full of ash is way less suspicious than an actual human corpse. Also, easier to smuggle wrapped in bearskin."

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The look he gives her practically shouts that Lucy is such a confusing person and why is she telling him about smuggling his ashes in a bearskin - gods that's uncomfortable - and also he doesn't care because Staven. "I would appreciate it a lot," he says stiffly, lacing his tunic, one-handed because he absolutely isn't letting go of Van. "Are we, um, going somewhere now?" He's calmer now. He can manage that. For a bit. He really isn't sure how long. 

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"--Sorry, I had a weird upbringing, sometimes I forget what makes other people uncomfortable. Uh...I think so?" She looks at Lancir.  

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Lancir steps over to them. "Vanyel. Listen - how would you feel about staying in your old room, at least temporarily? It's the only available big suite," it hasn't been reassigned for almost a year because, well, it's not like the Heralds think it's haunted per se but its associations aren't pleasant, "and I think familiar surroundings will, er, help Tylendel orient. But I would understand if you never want to see the place again. What do you think?" He watches Vanyel intently. 

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Vanyel does tense up a bit. But he looks over at Savil, then at Lucy. "...That sounds all right," he says, uncertainly. "'Lendel, what do you think?" 

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"If you want to, ashke..." 

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"It sounds good," Vanyel says, firmer. 

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"Do I need to do the thing where I share my invisibility?"

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"You can do that?" Lancir looks startled. "I was going to ask Savil to cover us with an illusion while we walk, but that works too." 

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"Anything I wrap myself around can't be seen, and I have a lot of arms. Well, sort of arms. Tentacles. Is that weird to say, I'm really bad at judging this." She didn't bring up the comparison of putting things in her mouth though so that's an improvement.

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Tylendel doesn't think he can comment on what's weird anymore, he just died for almost a year, but whatever method of transportation will get them to a private familiar comfortable room where he can hold Vanyel for the next, oh, several weeks straight, will do fine. 

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"Anybody who's attracted to girls, close your eyes," Lucy says, heading for the door, then once she's outside she pulls off her dress and is naked outdoors for barely a moment before her form blurs and shifts and disappears. 

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Vanyel, still gripping Tylendel's hand firmly, heads for where he's pretty sure her big form is.

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A white shape bursts toward them. Yfandes very briefly nuzzles Vanyel before prancing around. :Gala! It's so incredibly good to see you!: The two of them are both almost dancing in place with excitement. 

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"...What, Van got Chosen?" Tylendel staggers a half-step back. "Why didn't you say anything - when - how - oh, gods, ashke, I am so proud of you, you've got no idea." He wraps his arms tightly around Vanyel again. 

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"Oh! Yeah, that happened, her name is Yfandes and she's a sweetheart." 

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"I can, um, tell you more things about it later..." :And I'm a Mindspeaker now!: he adds. Having Gifts feels a thousand times less like a burden and more like an exciting new, well, gift, now that he can unpack it for 'Lendel. "Let's get a ride back, though, first. It's actually really comfortable." 

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Lucy gently--and slowly enough that Tylendel, who is not familiar with the process, can object at any time, lifts them onto her back and then cocoons them in snuggly soft boneless limbs. 

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All right this is really strange, but Vanyel actually seems to like it, and...strange doesn't have to mean bad. Tylendel is pretty relaxed in the cozy grip of said soft boneless limbs by the time Lancir guides them off the path to a little secluded garden behind one of the buildings. 

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And the glazed garden door. It's agonizingly familiar as soon as Vanyel glimpses it, and for a second it's too much and he wants to flee in the opposite direction, but – no, the terrifying thing isn't real, it was but it isn't anymore. The thing he couldn't look at or think about was that Tylendel was dead. The rest, vague formless days and nights of agony and panic and magic happening to him at random – well, Vanyel's most recent memories of this room aren't good, but he can bear it. And remember the other things that happened in this place, too, the ones that were wonderful. 

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Lucy sets them down gently, then immediately shifts back into human form and pulls on her dress. 

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Vanyel takes a tentative step. He glances back at Lucy. "...You can come in and see, if you want. This used to be my - our - bedroom. Before." He says it almost without faltering. 

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"Sure." She gives him a quick hug. He looks like he could use it. 

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It's a nice room! Lancir must have thought ahead enough to make sure that someone made it habitable again – it's been aired out, the bed made with fresh linens that still smell of some herb they were stored with. There's a fireplace, a bookshelf, lots of natural light from both the glass door and the big window above the bed. Tylendel seems to relax a little as his eyes recognize it–

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But Vanyel doesn't. He freezes, goes rigid. 

 

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"Ashke...?" Tylendel stops, uncertain. "Are you all right– gods! Were you...here...after I... I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. But - hey - Van, ashke, I'm here now. I'm here. I'm not going anyway, I promise, I–" He gives up on words doing any good whatsoever, and just hugs Vanyel as hard as he can. 

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Lucy hugs him from the other side. 

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Lancir waits for a while until Vanyel has stopped trembling. 

"All right," he says finally. "I have some things that I'd like to say to both of you – want to have a seat?" He gestures at the bed. "Van, would you like it if Lucy stayed for this?" He glances at her expression, to check if this seems all right with her, he's assuming it will though. 

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Mute nod. 

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She flashes Lancir a discreet thumbs-up. 

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Lancir waits until the two of them are sitting, then drags over a chair from near the fireplace and sits as well. 

"I'm going to use my Mindhealing Gift," he says. "Just a tiny bit – I'm about to say some things I think are very important, and I want to help you both remember them." He waits for nods. "All right. You're together again. That's a wonderful thing for both of you, and - I want to remind you that it probably won't fix everything, not right away. You've both been through a lot. Tylendel – you died, that's a big thing, you came back months later and everything's different. Van's changed significantly when you weren't looking. It's still very fresh, you understandably feel awful about what happened, it's...going to be raw for you in a way that's less true for the rest of us. You went through a lot right when it all happened – even if it was only for seconds, from your perspective, you lost your Companion. You have her back but you still lost her. And all the rest that came before, still happened – to you, your lifebonded was kidnapped just candlemarks ago. That's a lot to process." 

He turns to Vanyel. "And you still went through almost a year without your lifebonded. You spent most of that time expecting it to be permanent. You went through one of the worst times of your life – pain, uncontrolled Gifts – without him. You've been trying so hard to scrape yourself back together, and you did really, really well, and now everything's different again, and change is hard even if it's for the better." 

Lancir folds his hands in his lap, licks his lips as he finds the next words. 

"What I'm saying," he adds finally, "is that you still have hard times ahead. Memories that aren't going to stop hurting just because they're in the past. Things you need to learn about each other, feelings to be resolved. Not every day will be a happy one, probably not for a while, and - and that doesn't mean that you don't love each other, you know? It certainly doesn't mean you're ungrateful for what Lucy did – right, Lucy?" 

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"Well, of course!" 

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Lancir smiles at her before looking back to the two boys. "Anyway. You're both almost certainly going to experience more pain, and that's all right. You'll come through it. I may be able to help a little, and you've got Savil and Lucy and your Companions and plenty of other good friends to lean on, but most importantly you have each other." 

(Vanyel is crying again; Tylendel hugs him, looking discomfited.)

Lancir's eyes turn to Lucy. "Lucy, you've had some wise things to say before. Anything helpful to add here?" 

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"Putting people in a position where it's awkward to object to mind magic seems kinda sketchy." 

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Lancir just looks startled. "What?" 

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"You just did stuff to their brains. I mean, it was just helping them remember stuff, I think, but people's minds are who they are and messing with that in any way is a big deal and putting someone in a position where if they did object to that it would be awkward to say so seems...bad. Like, imagine if you had a power that let you stick your hand in someone's chest, that'd be weird and big, right? And a person's brain is a lot more them than their body."

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Lancir still seems more confused than anything. "...Vanyel, Tylendel, did either of you have any objections?"  

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Tylendel shakes his head like he's mostly thinking about other things, but Vanyel stiffens. It's a while before he manages to speak, though. "I - would kind of - have preferred not?" he pushes out. He can't manage to say why, partly because saying words at all is a massive effort right now but mostly because he's not actually sure. Which makes it feel stupid to object, but Lucy was looking at them so supportively.

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She hugs Vanyel and gives Lancir a pointed look. 

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Lancir rubs his chin, nonplussed. "...Well, I can default to not doing it in future, then, and ask if I think it's particularly important." He rises. "Savil, call me if you think it'd be good to have me here again, otherwise I'll go catch Elspeth up on how it went. I'll leave it up to you when seems good for Mardic and Donni to come over." 

He leaves. 

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Vanyel is giving Lucy a helpless "now what??" sort of look. 

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"So, um...do you like music too?" Lucy asks Tylendel for lack of a better idea. "I know a bunch of songs from my world and I've been singing them but I haven't super had time to translate them..." 

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"...What? Oh. Music, right. Music's, I like it. Van likes music - right, ashke?" Tylendel squeezes Vanyel again, his eyes focusing for a second, but he's still speaking like someone who isn't quite present in the room. 

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"I always find it easier to appreciate a song when I know what it means, so I want to translate them. My repertoire is a bit eclectic, I think, but still nice. Um, I actually grew up in my other shape and wasn't able to be around people outside my own family much until I learned to shapeshift."

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"I would really like helping you translate them!" Vanyel offers. 

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"Sure, that sounds fun," Tylendel says absently.

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"Okay! Um, do you have one in particular you'd like to start with, or should I pick." 

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"Um, why don't you pick."

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"Um, okay, how about," and she hums the first few bars of Amazing Grace. "It's called, how would I translate it, 'Awestriking Fortune?'"

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"Oh, I liked that one." Vanyel also seems subdued, but at least he's making eye contact. 

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She nods. "Getting it to scan will be harder, but roughly..." and then she sings each line of the first verse, followed by a rough translation. 

"Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound. 

What awestriking fortune, what wondrous song

That saved a wretch like me

That I, from my misery, have been saved. 

I once was lost but now am found

Though I lost my way, I have found the path

Was blind, but now I see.

And the darkness has been lifted from my eyes." 

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Vanyel listens attentively, hums along – and, just as she finishes, bursts into tears. 

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Tylendel looks stricken. "Van, ashke, what - hey, it's all right, you don't have to cry..." It's very obvious that he has no idea how to respond. 

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Lucy hugs him, looks at Tylendel, and jerks her head as if to say what are you waiting for, also hug him. 

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Tylendel pulls Van into his arms again, but he's still giving Lucy a helpless look. A few seconds later, he reaches out with a Mindtouch. :Can you hear me this way?: 

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:Yeah.: Her Mindspeak voice hasn't started sounding any less weird. :It's how I talked to Savil and Vanyel and Yfandes and Kellan at all before I learned Valdemaran.:

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:Oh. Right: He tenses more; it's another reminder of the time when he wasn't there. :Lucy, I - it's all my fault. I hurt Van so much, it's my fault he's upset and– and I can't take that back, ever, that's just going to be forever now...: 

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:...I'm going to tell you something I told Vanyel when we first met. So, I'm half not human, my father is some kind of extraplanar magic thing. My mom had me and my twin like that because her life kinda sucked and she wanted to give something special to her children. But the thing is we came out weird. I wasn't humanoid at all, I was an invisible tentacled creature with a bajillion legs who grew way too fast. We kept me fed by buying cows a lot, but Grandfather was handling it and then he died and my mom and my brother had to handle that but the people who were selling cows didn't like them much, they hadn't liked Grandfather much but with him they had at least had an ongoing business relationship. So the cow supply dwindled precipitously, and I got hungry. I got so hungry it got hard to think. And I asked if that was normal, if you were hungry enough, and my mom said yes and she was worried but she was worried for me. Because when a human gets so hungry they can't think at all, they just pass out. 

I don't pass out. Or not entirely. My higher functions stop working and my body is operated entirely by instincts that do nothing except look for food. And don't notice that people aren't. 

When you woke up, you found out you fucked up and got dead for a year. When I woke up, I found out I ate my mother. 

Someday I'm gonna figure out how to get her back. And probably she'll be mad at me. But she'll still love me, because when we fuck up horribly, the people we love still love us, and we don't become monsters.:

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...Well, that's horrifying. And gross. And - gah - it's worse, than what he did, but...Lucy isn't, Lucy cares – she found Van, his Van, and she decided to find Tylendel's ashes and bring him back because even with what he'd done Vanyel still wanted him and Vanyel was broken without him and, and– and he doesn't even know what, it's all tangled puzzle pieces that don't fit together. 

:You're not a monster: he pushes out. :You - weren't you, when that happened. It was just your body. I...made a choice: It's tempting to pretend it somehow wasn't his fault, that it was all just instinct after Gala died, but that isn't true. He remembers choosing. 

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:People do terrible things, in extremis. You chose, but you regretted it the instant you came back. You wanted to have been stopped. I wish I had showed up earlier, I wish I had been able to forestall the whole thing, but making one wrong choice, even a big one, doesn't make you unworthy of love.:

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He wants that to be true. 

...And, then again, does it even matter what he wants? Vanyel didn't deserve any of this to happen and Lucy brought him back because she wanted to fix it and...she's right, he needs to fix it, he needs to do whatever it takes to make things right for Vanyel whether or not he, Tylendel, deserves to be loved. 

He hugs Vanyel. He can probably do that much without messing it up. 

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:And...I haven't exactly known you for very long, but apart from the self-recriminations, I do like you so far.:

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Tylendel is so unsure how to react to that. :I...like you too, you seem...good: He really can't manage any more content than that.

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Vanyel sniffles, lifts his head from Tylendel's chest. "Lucy, could you sing some more?" It's actually really hard, getting himself calmed down, when he's an Empath now and so is Tylendel and they're both upset. 

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"Yeah okay." What to sing though...she is not singing "Loch Lomon" or "Ain't Misbehavin'" or anything with love themes at all to these maudlin gay Heralds right now because she doesn't super trust them not to start crying again, not that crying isn't a productive thing to do with feelings but she feels like maybe she shouldn't knowingly prompt it with singing right now. 

She ends up going with the lullaby. And you know what Mindspeaking a translation probably works better than stopping every line. 

"Sleep now, my dear one, the world does not know

Just who you are or just how you will grow 

The world's full of wonders, and you are their gem

And you'll reach far higher than any of them

I know things are hard now, but go you to sleep

The morning comes nigh and our problems will keep

Sleep now, my dear one, this time is for rest 

So cuddle up cozy and safe in your nest"

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It's only late afternoon, but it's been a long day and a long week and a lot of emotions and he hasn't been sleeping well, honestly it's been eight months of constant struggle, and he's so tired, and Tylendel is stroking his hair, he's missed that so much. Vanyel finds himself dozing off with his head in Tylendel's lap by the fourth line, and he sort of half reaches out with a Mindtouch, :ashke: and then he's drifting into sleep. 

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Tylendel holds very still, though he keeps petting Vanyel's hair. :Lucy, what - how do I – he's so...: He doesn't even know what question he's asking. 

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:Keep hugging him. I can't imagine the petting is a bad idea, petting rarely is, but I don't think you have to keep it up the whole time he's asleep, your hand'll get tired. Also, I wouldn't be surprised if he doesn't wake up until morning, and you should probably sleep at some point during that interim.: 

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Tylendel is, in fact, exhausted. The last thing he remembers before waking up naked in a stone room involved a late-night chase through a forest, not to mention the fighting part. However, he's experiencing way too many emotions to fall asleep, he isn't even sure what they are, just that his head is too full and he feels like he might explode if he doesn't find - something...

:Can you stay?: he sends, pleading. :I, just, I'm scared that I don't know what to do. To help, to do right by him. He's so sad. How do I...: He doesn't even know if 'fix it' is the right phrase, but, something. :You were there: he finishes. 

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:Yeah, I'll stay. It's--it's going to get better from here. He missed you a lot. ...Relationships take work, and communication. Communicate. But maybe not when what he desperately wants is snuggles, there's a time and a place.:

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:How do I tell? When it's the time and place for what?: Tylendel dares to move enough to rake a hand through his hair. :I - I had no idea what I was doing before, but - it was fine, everything was good, it was - enough that we were in love, I guess? But now it's not and I... I don't know how to do any of this: 

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This is honestly kind of terrifying, she's only like two years older than him and it's not like she's ever been in a romantic relationship. 

But she's also the least traumatized person in the room, and she does have the example of Teacher's relationship with his wife to work from, as well as Grandfather's old stories about his marriage to Grandmother, so she's going to give it a shot. 

:It's hard, there's no way around it. But if he just wants to cuddle then cuddle him and if he wants to talk don't try to change the subject.:

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Tylendel nods; this seems to reassure him a little. He looks down at Vanyel, strokes his hair some more. 

:He's gotten some white hairs: he sends finally, wonderingly. :Those weren't there before: It's just a tiny smattering of them, around Vanyel's temples. :Gala says it's from using node-energy: His eyes widen a bit. :...Makes it feel real. That I was gone. It doesn't feel like there was...any time in between. But of course it wouldn't, for me, I was dead. Van was the one who had to keep living: He seems to be thinking in Mindspeech more than talking to Lucy. 

After a few beats of silence, though, he lifts his head. :He's going to be really mad at me. Later. Isn't he?: 

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:Probably.:

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Tylendel is making a lot of faces, trying to push out some thought. :...I don't know what that's like: he tried finally. :I don't - think - he was ever angry with me, before?: And then the tears come, but he manages to cry without making any noise or waking Vanyel. :We didn't have long enough. It felt like so much time, but...a few months. He's gone three times that long with me...gone:

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:That really really sucks,: she replies, tears gathering in the corners of her eyes. :It's really hard for me to imagine being in your position.:

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Tylendel still seems to desperately want, need, someone nearby to point his Mindspeech at, even if it's not that clear he's listening to her answers. :He was so scared. When he came to Haven. That nobody cared, that everyone would hurt him if he let any weakness slip. And then we were, er, together, and he was just starting to be less scared – all it took was a few people being kind to him, and he was, I could see him starting to grow into someone who wasn't always trying to hide and be small, and it was so good, I was so proud and happy and–:

He turns away to face the wall. :And then I betrayed him. I hurt him worse than anyone else in the world could have: His mindvoice falters, comes back; he's leaking distress in the overtones now. :Lucy, how bad was it? Tell me straight, please. How badly did I - break him?: 

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:...Right after you died he threw himself in a river and they only fished him out in time to save him because that's when Yfandes got the Call. And, um, the reason he has Gifts now is that...that Gate you did...ended up attached to him after you died and when it came down it blew open all his potential Gift-paths. That's why he was in the Pelagirs when I landed there, the Tayledras have healers who could mend his channels and Savil has friends there.:

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...Well, he did ask for it. :Oh no. That must've...hurt a lot. The Gifts part: His mind flinches away from even imagining it, he thought he'd prepared himself for the worst and it's still somehow worse than he thought and now Vanyel is stirring restlessly in his sleep because Tylendel can't manage to keep his own stupid feelings inside his stupid shields. 

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Lucy's attention is immediately diverted to Van and she starts softly singing the lullaby again. 

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Vanyel calms down without waking fully.

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And Tylendel has a moment to catch his breath and calm down. He should sleep. His entire body hurts with fatigue, his eyes are scratchy and burning - maybe that's all the crying actually - but he can't imagine falling asleep. :Lucy, I feel so awful. Wanna sleep but...can't stop thinking about how it's my fault: 

Probably she's going to tell him that's stupid, but somehow in that way where it doesn't feel like she thinks he's stupid. 

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:I can keep singing lullabies if you think it'll help. I don't have much else to offer in terms of sleep aid unless you think snuggly tentacle cuddles are likely to help, unfortunately.:

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:Er, thanks for the offer but I'll pass. The singing is nice: Tylendel can get himself lying down, at least, and both of them under the blankets, moving carefully so as not to wake Van and petting him more whenever he stirs at all. They're both fully clothed and it's not even dark outside yet but whatever. 

 ...Actually, once he's horizontal and cozy and has a nice warm armful of sleeping Vanyel, he's going to have a lot less trouble falling asleep than he thought. 

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Oh good. 

She keeps singing. It's not like she's going to go hoarse anytime soon, and she does enjoy it. Fortunately she also knows more than just the one lullaby, as well as songs that aren't strictly lullabies but have good melodies for it, so she's not going to get bored of just the one anytime soon. 

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Savil pokes her head in quietly a few minutes later. :...Oh, they're asleep? Goodness, they look so - I don't even know - goddamnit I'm going to cry: She swipes at her eyes. :You'll, er, stay? I'll be in the room right next door: She gestures with her chin. 

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:Yeah, I'll be right here.:

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Savil goes off to her bedroom. 

 

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Vanyel sleeps through the night, more deeply and restfully than he has in many months.

When he wakes up, still in Tylendel's arms, and opens his eyes to see the familiar bookshelf and fireplace, for a moment... Well, just for an instant he doesn't even notice the confusion, of course he's here, at home, in Haven, with 'Lendel. And then – gods was all of it just a nightmare, the last almost-year of horror – and then the even worse thought, what if this is the part that's a dream, but no, even in his dreams where Tylendel is there it doesn't feel like he's still lifebonded. That part is unmistakeable. 

And the voice singing softly is one he knows. 

:It's not a dream, Chosen: Yfandes confirms. :Remember yesterday?: 

Now he does. 

He stays perfectly still, 'Lendel is asleep and holding him and Vanyel doesn't want either of those things to change, but he does reach out with a soft Mindtouch. :Lucy?: 

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:Good morning!:

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:Good morning! Thank you for, um, staying: 

Vanyel lies still for a while. Everything should be perfect, he's warm and safe and 'Lendel is there breathing beside him, but – for some reason he still can't relax. For some reason there's a pressure in his throat and prickling in his eyes and it's so stupid and he doesn't understand. 

:Lucy?: he reaches out again. :I feel really: he was about to say 'sad' but that isn't even it, :I feel like - something's wrong, and I don't know why: 

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:Well, he was dead for most of a year and probably you built up some mental scar tissue in that time, the scar tissue would still be there even though the wound's closed. And you might be upset with him for fucking up like that?:

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:I'm not mad at him: There should probably be a 'yet' in that sentence but Vanyel is steering away as hard as he can from even that possibility. :It's stupid, I feel like I can't talk to him. Like I...used to know him and now I don't. But he's the same. I guess I'm the one who changed?: And now he's crying for a completely ridiculous reason. Again. 

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:Yeah. He was dead for a while and a lot happened in that time. There's not a lot we can do to fix that, besides telling him about the interim and just...letting you two get to know each other again. I--what I did fixed the worst part, the hardest part, but that doesn't mean there isn't anything left to fix. I would love it if I could just make everything all better immediately but I can't, magic only goes so far, all I can do now is be here for you two and be an external perspective that's much less traumatized to give advice.:

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:Thank you: It does feel less overwhelming, with Lucy there. :I should talk to him when he wakes up. Tell him about the important things that changed me a lot: And now his teeth are trying to clench again. :I'm scared to. He feels so guilty already and I don't want him to feel worse and he will, if I tell him honestly how bad things were: 

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:Last night after you fell asleep he asked me to tell him honestly how bad it was and I told him about the river and about how the Gate ripped your channels open.:

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:Oh: Why hadn't it even occurred to him that Tylendel might also notice the holes in his knowledge and ask? :How, um, did he react?: 

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:He felt really guilty and I told him about how my mom died as an object lesson in how fucking up really bad doesn't turn you into a monster who doesn't deserve to be loved.:

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:...Did telling him that help?: Lucy told him the story and it was comforting even though it's really a very weird example of comfort, but Vanyel finds it hard to guess if Tylendel would have reacted the same way. 

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:I think so, but he was still feeling pretty guilty when he went to sleep.:

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:I wish he didn–: Vanyel stops himself. :No, I don't wish that, it's – if he didn't feel guilty that'd feel even worse. Just, I wish he could do it more quietly? It's so awful, feeling him being upset... But that's really unfair, saying he's only allowed to have his feelings if it's the right way:

He takes some more slow breaths, steels himself. :I guess I need to be brave about it, and...tell him the important things, if he gets upset I can handle it. It still won't hurt as much as it did before: 

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:Is that the bond or just Empathy, that you can feel it? Either way it seems like it's going to make things unnecessarily harder.:

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Vanyel has to think about that. :It's both? It's the bond, but – more than before, when I wasn't an Empath too. It's like there's echoes now. I...can shield that too, if I try: He involuntarily grasps for Tylendel. :But, I don't know, it feels scary. Feeling him there less: 

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:I can see how it would. I definitely agree that it's probably going to be harder to work things out than if the emotional cross-contamination weren't happening. I dunno, don't...think there's something wrong with it not being instantly perfect? Things are much much better than they were when yesterday started but that doesn't mean they're all better and it's not wrong for you to not go 'things are much much better and so I am completely and uncomplicatedly happy.':

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:That makes sense. Thank you: Vanyel relaxes a bit, and is able to enjoy just being there, with Tylendel nearby. 

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Tylendel wakes up a few minutes later, stirs, his arms tighten around Vanyel even before he's properly awake and - honestly that's not anything new or special, he used to do it every morning, but it still makes Vanyel start crying again. 

"...Ashke?" Tylendel, confused, blinks his way to full alertness. Oh. Right. The shame rises again in his throat, hot and sick, and now neither of them is very calm anymore. 

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Um. Uh. 

Lucy darts out of the room briefly to go check if Savil is awake.

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Savil is sitting in the living room area in a robe with a cup of tea, looking at least half awake. 

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"Hi they're awake and crying and if you had something to interrupt with that you'd been waiting on because you didn't want to wake them now would be awesome."

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"Oh no!" Savil hops up. "Er, their friends Mardic and Donni really want to see them – yesterday they were both so worn out, the poor things, but does this seem like something where a distraction would help?" 

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"I think so--uh, Vanyel was having a lot of feelings, and then Tylendel woke up, and then Vanyel started crying and then Tylendel started crying. I think this is probably a situation where interrupting the feedback loop would be better but I could be wrong. Um, maybe don't interrupt them with their friends but interrupt to ask them if they're up to it?"

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"Oh, damn, they're both Empaths. The bond by itself is bad enough, Mardic and Donni had a couple of awful meltdowns at each other when they'd just gotten lifebonded and weren't used to it – I mean, they were thirteen at the time." 

Savil ducks through the doorway. "Van, 'Lendel, would you like it if Mardic and Donni came by? I'll, er, give you time to wash up." They're both still wearing their extremely rumpled clothes from the day before. 

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"Oh, hey, speaking of, uh," she gestures at the rumpled-clothes thing, "how would I go about obtaining a change of clothes at some point, like I don't sweat and I didn't spend all that much time human on the road but."

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"Gods! Ask me, I'm so sorry I didn't think to offer." Savil glances thoughtfully at her. "My clothes ought to sort of fit, at least." 

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"Don't worry about it, I really didn't spend much time human on the road and we've both had bigger things to worry about since we got here." 

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Tylendel and Van are pretty obviously having a private Mindspeech conversation.  

“Seeing Mardic and Donni sounds good,” Tylendel says finally. He straightens his shoulders as though preparing himself, and does not particularly look like the word “good” is one he would usually choose. 

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She suspects there's something going on in his head that she'd want to flick him in the forehead for if she knew about it but, you know, mental privacy, no such things as thoughtcrimes. 

"...I'd sorta like to be in something clean, before meeting new people--it was so, so far down the priority list before but," but now Tylendel is alive and she doesn't have to furiously alchemy, "this dress doesn't show dirt much but I have, in fact, not washed it in over a month."

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Savil goes and finds her a Valdemaran-style gown, one of the few pieces she owns that isn't Herald's Whites, she hasn't worn it in about ten years anyway. She offers Lucy one of the spare bedrooms to change. "You and Wilbur could have this bedroom, actually, if you like? I've offered Mardic and Donni the fourth bedroom, if they want to move back in here for a few days while the boys are, er, getting re-oriented. But that one was empty even before."

The gown is a dark golden-brown colour, sturdy cotton fabric, lightweight for summer, undecorated save for a tiny bit of lighter yellow embroidery around the severe square neckline. The skirt falls to calf-length, with enough fabric to fall naturally into folds and give her legs reasonable freedom of movement; the waistline is cut high, landing around her navel, and laces up in the back; the sleeves are loose, but can be sort of ruched up and buttoned at mid-forearm. 

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Lucy can hear Tylendel and Vanyel talking quietly through the wall as they get dressed in their own room. "Van, ashke, you've lost way too much weight," Tylendel is saying. 

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Ooh yay another ally in making-Van-eat-enough. Which should hopefully be easier now that he doesn't have a gaping hole in his brain anyway. 

Ee the dress is pretty. She twirls in it and hugs herself before coming back out. 

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The boys are dressed in clean clothes, hair has been combed and faces have been washed, Savil's obtained breakfast from somewhere and the three of them are sitting around the dining-room table. 

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"Mardic and Donni are on their way," Savil informs her. "Breakfast? Wilbur's welcome to join us too – is he back in the guest-room?" 

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Nod. 

"Wilbur's not as much of a people person as I am but I'm betting he'll at least want to briefly meet them," Lucy says. "I just might have to drag him out first because just because he knows what he actually prefers doesn't make it not hard." 

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"Up to him," Savil says. Her eyes go unfocused: "...They'll be headed this way in about twenty minutes." 

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"He needs more alone time than I do and didn't get much on the road, I'm not surprised he's holing up a little now."

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"Well, fair enough, he's certainly welcome to hole up for a bit. I understand wanting that." 

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Lucy nods and serves herself some breakfast and surreptitiously watches Vanyel eat to see if just resurrecting Tylendel is enough to solve his eating problem or if she's going to need to put more work into that.

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Vanyel isn't exactly going after his food with enthusiasm, but he seems less tired than usual, so at least he's picking at it faster. And Tylendel is clearly keeping an eye on how much he's eating, and then nudging him and putting more on his plate. 

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Lucy approves of Tylendel. She catches his eye while he's putting something on Van's plate and grins at him. 

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Tylendel, nervous and tentative, smiles back at her. 

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:You should've seen them when they were first together: Savil sends with private Mindspeech and a sly glance. :I think 'Lendel was just – feeding Van fruit, they were completely oblivious to the rest of us. It was sickeningly adorable: 

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:Awwwwwww.:

She finishes eating and assembles a plate to take in to Wilbur while she cajoles him to come out and meet people. 

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"Van! Oh, gods, 'Lendel!" A young towheaded man, stocky and broad-shouldered, bursts through the door. "I can't believe it! You're - you're both..." He gives up on words and just crosses the room and hugs both of them at once. 

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"It's a tragedy we can't tell anyone, this is the best story ever." A small darker-skinned girl with tightly-curled black hair follows him in and stops in front of Lucy, hands on her hips. "Are you Lucy? Do you really turn into a giant beast with tentacles all over?" 

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"I turn into a giant invisible beast with tentacles all over. I can do the tentacles without turning all the way, though," she says, playfully manifesting one off her arm and tapping Donni on the shoulder with it. 

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Donni lights up. She goes off into peals of laughter. "That's so unbelievable! Mardic, did you see, Mardic, look!: 

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"Donni, love, I'm a little busy greeting our best friends who we haven't seen in almost a year. In case you hadn't noticed, they're here too." 

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"I'm not sure what he'd get out of looking, anyway, since, invisible," Lucy points out. 

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Donni shrugs and goes to hug Vanyel and Tylendel as well. She whispers something in Vanyel's ear that makes him turn bright red, and gives him a playful smack, then turns to Tylendel and grabs his shoulders, staring into his face at arms' length. "Never thought I'd get to know the answer to this, 'Lendel, but. What in all hells were you thinking?" 

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Tylendel stares at her, slack-jawed, his cheeks going pale. Then he bursts into tears. 

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Vanyel hugs him tightly. "'Lendel, it's all right – Donni, can you please not right now?" 

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"I kind of had to spend a chunk of last night convincing him that fucking up that badly doesn't make him a horrible monster who doesn't deserve to be loved," Lucy murmurs quietly into Donni's ear. 

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"...Oh gods they're going to be even more melodramatic than before, aren't they?" Donni keeps her voice discreetly low, at least. "Don't worry, I'll play nice. For now." 

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"Just remember that if you make more work for me in calming them down, I'm not too full of feelings to put frogs in your bed." 

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"...Duly noted." 

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Mardic has his hand on Tylendel's shoulder; it looks like they might be taking their turn at a private Mindspeech conversation. Then Vanyel kisses Tylendel's forehead and steps back, only releasing his hand when he has to. 

"We're going for a walk," Mardic says. "Just 'Lendel and I. We'll be back soon." 

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"Cool." I will not eavesdrop, I will not eavesdrop, even though my hearing is better than human and I could probably get away with it--actually. "Uh, if you're discussing anything you don't want heard, my hearing is about twice as good as a normal human's, so you should probably take that into account when estimating earshot." 

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"Oh. Thanks for the warning." 

They head out. 

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Vanyel stands for a moment with his hands loose at his sides, like he doesn't know what to do with them, then makes a beeline for Savil, who's relocated to the couch. Instead of sitting beside her, he folds up at her feet and puts his head on her knee. 

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"--Sorry about the frogs thing, I thought it sounded cool but, uh, I don't actually know you well enough to know if it would sound playful or creepy." 

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"...I put a toad in Mardic's bed," Donni says. "First week we were both here. I was mad because – well, he would say things and they were distracting and it felt like he had to be doing it on purpose. It, um, turns out that was just being lifebonded."  

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"Maybe this is just my first experience of the phenomenon being Vanyel before I brought Tylendel back but I think I'm glad we don't have those where I'm from, losing people sucks but having a gaping hole in your brain just doesn't feel like an appropriate response."

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The face Donni makes is of someone who is doing her best to listen politely to the new guest, but also would really rather not follow that line of thought.

"Eh," she says. "Upsides and downsides. We can do really cool magic. And if we die at the same time it's fine." 

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"Tell me more about the magic, I haven't had a lot of opportunity to see the upsides." 

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"Well, it lets us do concert work," Donni says brightly. "It wasn't easy to learn, we, er, have very different styles of doing magic, but once we got it it worked great. So if we're fighting together, we're a lot more than twice as strong as either of us alone. And we can coordinate really well, we both have a sense of what the other is doing." 

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"They're nowhere near mastery of what's possible here," Savil jumps in. "Starwind and Moondance are lifebonded too, and they're incredible. They can go into full rapport and practically use each other's senses and Gifts interchangeably." She strokes Van's hair. "Hey, ke'chara, that's a thought – you and 'Lendel are both mages now."

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"Oh, they are? Somehow that didn't come up..."

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:They weren't going to bring it up casually with Van nearby: Savil sends privately. Vanyel...is looking kind of tense again, despite Savil's proximity. 

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:Yeeeeah that makes sense.: Lucy goes over and also sits at Savil's feet and hugs Van. 

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Vanyel lets his head fall onto her shoulder. His breath catches. :Lucy: he sends privately, :I don't – why is it so scary, that he's - not right here? I can still feel him. I know he'll be right back, just...: 

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:Because you're super traumatized. You were literally being tortured over it for like two-thirds of a year. People's minds learn what things happen at the same time as pain and want to avoid them. Even though the problem was him being dead, not him simply happening not to be there, it's no wonder you're not comfy with it.:

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:...Do you think it'll get easier?: Vanyel is shivering slightly. :I mean, he has to go do other things sometimes: 

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:...Probably? If he goes away for little bits sometimes and it's just scary and it's not so much you have a panic attack then probably eventually your subconscious will notice that him not being physically present doesn't mean torture.:

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:I think I might be panicking right now if you and Savil weren't here: Vanyel admits.

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:Well, we are, so you're not. And I'm your friend and I like being around you and I like hugs, so I'm not gonna get tired of coming over to hug you when you need it.:

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Then Vanyel can sit with her and Savil, and stay calm and keep his composure until Tylendel gets back. 

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Tylendel looks like he's been crying a bit, by the slight blotchiness around his eyes, but he's sort of laughing now. He joins Vanyel on the floor. "Heya, ashke. Missed you. Back now." 

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She is not going to ask no matter how curious she is

Topic of conversation topic of conversation topic of--oh right. 

"You know what, you guys should meet my brother, I'm going to go grab him." Van-hugging being safely handled by Tylendel she gives him a brief squeeze and then jumps up to go dart into their guest room for Wilbur. 

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Wilbur is curled up reading. 

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"Hey, new people are here, you should meet the new people, also you didn't really interact with Tylendel or anything yesterday so I'm not sure he can meaningfully have been said to meet you, I know you're not the most gregarious but I think you should come out at least for a bit." 

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"...Yeah, alright," he sighs, and marks his place in his book, and comes out with her, having to stoop under the doorframe. 

He's still wearing plenty of layers, but in concession to how chill everyone has been with his sister's far-more-inhuman form, he's left off his heavy coat and his digitigrade leg structure is visible along with his ten-foot-tallness. 

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Donni leaps up. "Ooh you're so tall! That must be really useful for, I don't know, getting fruit out of trees or– oh! Do your legs have tentacles on them? That's neat!" 

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"...My legs, no. My torso, yes."

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"...Can I see?" 

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"..."

Logically, there's no reason to say no. Logically, these people have already reacted well to Lucy, whose abnormalities dwarf his own. Logically, there is no possible harm that could come of acquiescing. 

Logic does less to overcome a lifetime of fear than one might wish. Instead of answering, Wilbur stares like a stunned deer. 

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"Uh, all the clothes that are cut to fit his size are also cut to hide how he deviates from humanity, so that might be difficult without more disrobing than is probably appropriate in the middle of Savil's living room." 

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"Aww. All right." Donni sits back down. "Did you eat breakfast yet? There's some left." 

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"Lucy brought me a plate earlier because I have the best sister." 

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"And don't you forget it. --Uh. Tylendel, I don't know if anyone mentioned it yet--Wilbur and I are twins, which is why I knew as soon as I found out that Staven existed how important it was going to be to get him back too." 

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"Oh, you are?" Tylendel has somehow found a way to splay himself out next to Vanyel that takes up almost the entire floorspace between the sofa and the armchair opposite it. "That's... Well, it makes me feel less weird about how everyone thought Staven and I didn't look alike."

...He shares a look with Van, and they both burst out laughing. 

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This is such a good outcome!!!

"Yeah, when you're hybridizing with whatever the fuck Yog-Sothoth is things get really fucking weird."

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"Lucy, I think your weirdness dwarfs the weirdness of how different we look."

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"Just as I dwarf you." 

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"Not in that shape, you don't." 

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Lucy sticks her tongue out at him. "You're just jealous because I'm prettier," she says loftily. 

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"In this room, we know at least three of these people are attracted to boys and we only have one confirmation of liking girls, I'm not actually sure you win that one right now." 

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Tylendel says something to Vanyel in a whisper, Vanyel makes a face at him, and they're both off in peals of laughter again. 

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"Did you just propose a threesome with him," Donni says, deadpan.

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And now Vanyel is bright red and also laughing too hard to breathe. 

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Lucy snickers. "You do what you want, but there are some things I am not going to stay in the room singing for!"

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–That breaks Donni's deadpan and now she's flopping back on the sofa, giggling uncontrollably, and even Mardic is snickering a bit. 

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"'Lendel, stop it - let me - catch my breath..." Vanyel flops against him. His eyes are bright; he looks happy

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It's a bright, warm glow in Lucy's heart. 

Vanyel is a good friend. She's liked him since the first day they met. She's loved him since not long after. And this is the first time she's seen him really happy. 

(Later, she will look back on this as the moment she started loving Tylendel too.)

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And then there is a candlemark or so of all of them sitting together, talking and laughing and the occasional hug or playful wrestle. 

Vanyel is starting to seem kind of withdrawn by the end of that time, though, curling up against Tylendel's side. Donni is busy relentlessly teasing Tylendel with some long embarrassing story from their years as students together, that has him turning pinker by the minute and very distracted. 

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Savil Mindspeaks Lucy. :Does Van look tired to you? Donni's going to be, er, like this until we tell her to quit – reckon we should try to get him some peace and quiet soon?: 

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:Physically tired I'm not sure of but if Wilbur was looking like that I would set a minor fire to distract people if I couldn't extricate him from the social situation any other way. I assume Van has less poker face and more people-tolerance than Wilbur does, but.:

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:Let's not push him on day one: "Mardic, Donni – why don't you two run along and bring your things over, if you do want to take up my offer to stay here for a bit." 

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There are goodbye (if only for a candlemark or two) hugs exchange, and Mardic and Donni head out. 

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"Not to be too self-congratulatory, but you have good taste in friends," she tells Vanyel. 

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"Hey there, they were my friends first," Tylendel points out. "Mardic and Donni are wonderful. I–" He shakes his head. "Suppose I didn't miss them, exactly, it - feels like I saw them yesterday. But...it's good to see them now, either way." 

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"You have good taste in friends, then," she tells Tylendel. 

Lucy, unlike a full human, can purr like a cat. She flops across the boys' laps and demonstrates this. 

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That's a tiny bit unsettling but mostly adorable. "Aww," Tylendel says. 

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Vanyel smiles along for a moment, but then turns serious. "'Lendel, I...wanted to talk. About some things." 

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Lucy does not stop purring but she quiets a bit. 

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Deep breaths. He can do this. 

"A lot of things happened in the last year. I got Chosen, my Gifts were awakened, I went to k'Treva with Savil. And I think it would help you...understand how I've changed...if I talked about the things."

He squeezes Tylendel's hand. "A lot of it was really hard. I think - that's going to be upsetting for you. But I'm not telling you because I want you to feel bad or guilty. All right?" 

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Look at how pettable Lucy is. Would petting her be soothing? Feel free if so. 

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Tylendel seems to find it so, at least.

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Vanyel takes another deep breath. "So I think Lucy might've already told you some. But I'll say it again anyway." Some of it's going to be really hard to say out loud; a lot of it, he's never actually talked about to anyone before. But Tylendel is here. He can be brave enough. 

"You died," he says. "I - watched it. I felt what you were feeling." And that isn't a memory he's been able to even look at, until now, but...now that he can, it falls into place. "So I understand why. I really mean that. That you - in that moment - you couldn't imagine - being in a world without her." He squeezes Tylendel's hand harder. "And I know that if someone had stopped you, even for thirty seconds, you - wouldn't have."

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Tylendel...looks down, blinking hard, and his breathing catches, and Vanyel tenses up a bit, but then both of them take a deep breath, and neither bursts into tears. 

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Oh no they're so good.

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Vanyel ducks his head. "So - you were dead. The Gate was still tied to me, draining me. I passed out. Until - Mardic came through, tried to take the Gate down, backlashed it - through me. I don't really remember, but I - must've gotten up, I remember - finding the river." He closes his eyes, leans against Tylendel. "I remember thinking that - you'd wanted me to live - so badly - enough to hold the Gate for me - but that I couldn't do it. So I jumped. I'm...sorry..." 

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Tylendel's face goes whiter and whiter; it's clearly agonizing for him to hear; but, at the end, he turns and wraps his arms around Vanyel. "Don't be, ashke. I understand. And, I should've stayed for you, but - I didn't. And Yfandes hadn't Chosen you yet, you had no one..." He gulps. "But...I'm really glad she fished you out. Though I bet you weren't at the time." 

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Lucy...does not mention that she could've brought Van back, too. For one thing, finding his bones at the bottom of the river would be hard, for another, she probably wouldn't have understood the Vanyel-and-Tylendel situation to be as important as she now knows it to be; for a third, she might be wandering the Pelagirs still if Savil hadn't had cause to bring Vanyel to k'Treva. It wouldn't have been an unrecoverable disaster if Van had succeeded in committing suicide, but this way is still much much better. 

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Tylendel's comment gets a weak chuckle from Vanyel. "I was extremely not glad about it at the time. Everyone insisted on putting in so much effort to keep me alive and I was miserable. I was in agony from how my Gifts got ripped open – and I couldn't stop doing magic by accident, even though it hurt me, they had me in Savil's Work Room and were giving me argonel because it was the only thing strong enough to help."

He's crying a bit now, but not too much to speak. "So those bits are really hazy for me. I said some mean things to Mardic and threw him into a wall and he still forgave me. And I, um, I sort of, tried to kill myself again. Apparently. I don't remember it at all - I just remember waking up and Lissa slapping me in the face about it. And Lancir talking to me. About - minds being like houses - and you'd exploded mine - but he wanted me to try to rebuild. And...I did try. I tried so hard. And I still don't think - I would ever have been all right - if you hadn't come back."

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Tylendel squeezes Vanyel tightly, but he lets out an involuntary whimper, and his shields slip and leak distress and guilt and shame. 

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And, inevitably, Vanyel bursts into tears. 

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Lucy stops purring and sits up and hugs them both. 

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Vanyel manages to get himself calmed down first. He shifts his position in Tylendel's arms enough to look him in the eye. "That's...not everything, but, I don't think I can talk about this any more right now." His voice cracks. "Can you just, hold me, for a while?" 

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Vanyel is being responsible and not pushing himself too much at once and Lucy approves so much. She is still not singing any love songs around them but gosh people she loves being good to themselves is so good.

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The rest of the day...is pretty uneventful, actually. Mardic and Donni, maybe picking up on hints – well, more likely Mardic doing so rather than Donni – are gone until after lunch, though it surely doesn't take that long to retrieve their belongings. They spend the afternoon setting up their new, well, old room again. Van and 'Lendel cuddle and talk about inconsequential matters and play some local dice-game with Savil that Lucy absolutely cannot follow the rules of.

They all sit down together for supper (well, Wilbur is invited but only if he wants to come.) 

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Meeting Mardic and Donni went amazingly well so yes Wilbur will show up for dinner. 

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After Vanyel serves himself, Tylendel goes back to add more food to his plate. He catches Lucy's eye and makes a long-suffering face. 

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:Was he like this before, too? I was hoping it was just a trauma thing.:

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:I think he's often not hungry when he's stressed or upset about anything? I remember him always picking at his food when he first came to Haven, and then he was better once we were together and things were really good and he was getting more relaxed in general: He frowns. :Then worse again after - Staven - when things were tense, I think, I was...pretty distracted. But, um, he must've been stressed and upset an awful lot when I wasn't there: 

And now Tylendel is looking sad again and Vanyel is glancing over, trying to figure out what's wrong. 

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:Well, I'm really glad you take it seriously. Food is important.:

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The praise seems to cheer him up, and Tylendel spends the rest of the meal gently poking Vanyel to eat more without being obvious about it.

:I think it might get better with time?: he sends to Lucy at one point. :He's still kind of tense right now: 

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:Yeah. He's not--completely secure in the fact that you're back--but he'll get there.:

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They finish eating and move back to the sofa and armchairs. Vanyel sits down at Tylendel's feet and puts his head down on his knee. 

Tylendel barely manages not to start crying again. He looks around; Savil is busy gossiping with Donni about her recent internship circuit with Mardic; and then Mindtouches Lucy again.

:Oh gods, he does– used to do this, all the time. Usually when he's tired, or nervous about something, and– Oh. Um, do you figure that means I should ask if he wants to go to bed? He might not say anything: 

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:Seems like a good plan. I've--mostly been trying to manage local symptoms, like not eating enough, and--well, I figured there wasn't much room to get better until you were back, and you were going to be, so...:

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Damn it, now he's thinking about how miserable Van was all the time he was gone, and it's a massive effort to keep all of that inside his shields. :...Maybe I'm ready for bed too: he admits. "Van, ke'chara, do you want to mosey to bed now?"

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Vanyel is, in fact, yawning when he stands up. "Sure, sounds good." He hugs Savil goodnight, waves to Wilbur, and then casts a hopeful look at Lucy.

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"Donni, is the fact that Van and 'Lendel don't like girls going to stop you from making inappropriate jokes when I follow them into their room to sing." 

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"I mean, probably not, because I'm me, but if it helps you should do it anyway." 

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Lucy cheerfully flips Donni off as she follows the boys. 

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Once again, Vanyel, who apparently has a lot of accumulated exhaustion, falls asleep within about a minute of Tylendel snuggling him and Lucy singing.

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:Your boyfriend is adorable.:

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Tylendel smirks. :Isn't he? I just want to look at him all night instead of sleeping: He strokes Vanyel's hair. :...It's weird, I keep thinking about how much I missed him and how scared I was and how I never want to let go. But I only thought I'd lost him for a couple of candlemarks, and there was - still hope, the whole time, I knew he was alive. He had to deal with a lot worse: 

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:I don't think that's weird at all. Fear and pain don't work that way. Yeah, he had it worse than you, and yeah, that makes him the priority for being taken care of. But that doesn't make what you suffered not real or important.:

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Tylendel chews on that for a while. 

:You're so kind: he sends finally. :You're so...good. How did you get that way?:

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:For the first eighteen years of my life, I had to hide from most of the world. I couldn't interact with anyone but my family. But--the corollary of that is that everyone I interacted with was someone who loved me and wanted me to be okay, because I had a good family. So I guess loving people and wanting them to be okay is just how I learned to be.:

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Tylendel looks intently at her. 

:I'm going to be a Herald: he sends. :Gods, Van is too, that's still such a weird thought: He's momentarily distracted by looking down at his boyfriend and petting him. :But, anyway. I...need to learn to be good. And - I wasn't good enough. It's not just what I did - at the end. Before that...: He pauses, biting his lip.

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:Insofar as I have a secret to how I do it it's just want everyone to be okay. Even the people who've hurt you, even the people who are objectively really awful. They're still people, they still experience suffering, and suffering is bad. Like, I don't have any plans to resurrect the mage who kidnapped Vanyel any time soon, but that's not because I want him dead, it's because he'll hurt other people. Even if he doesn't do anything else him being alive would probably make Van unhappy and I do, you know, prioritize the people I love. But, you know, someday, when we can make sure he doesn't hurt anyone and Van's healed from all the everything, probably a few hundred years from now or something, I want even him to get to be okay.:

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Tylendel is staring at her like she's some sort of weird alien. 

:...Gala thinks that's a problem I have: he sends, a long time later. :That I can't do that. Want the - people who hurt me or my people - to be okay. I just can't. I–: he turns away, ashamed, :I don't - actually want you to - but I sort of wish you could bring Krebain back. So I could kill him again. Properly. Make it hurt enough: 

He ducks his head, ashamed. :Heralds aren't supposed to feel that way: 

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:Wilbur wants stuff like that all the time. He was human-passing enough that he got to go out and experience a small town's opinion of how weird our family was. He fantasizes about going back and burning the whole place down on the regular. It's not a problem 'cause he doesn't do stuff like that no matter how badly he wants to. Just wanting doesn't hurt anything.:

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:...I would've done it: Tylendel sends. :If Lancir hadn't stopped me: a slow, shuddering breath, and he reinforces his shields before anything can leak out and upset Van. :...After Staven died, I couldn't think about anything but revenge. I - had a plan, it was an awful plan, it would've gotten me killed, worse, it would've gotten Van killed, and if not Gala would've repudiated me for sure...: 

He shakes his head. :She wasn't even mad, she said I - wasn't myself - but if I'd done it, for real, I don't think that would've mattered. And...I don't think anyone could've stopped me, if Lancir hadn't gone in my head and–: his breath catches, :I don't know what he did, it was awful, but - better than the alternative, I guess: 

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:...Wow, okay, I have pretty mixed feelings about that. Like, on the one hand, the idea of having someone go in your head and make you not do things is fucking terrifying, but on the other hand it is in fact really good that you did not do the thing. Well, um--if there's anything like that in the future...think about how badly it would have gone if you did that. You don't have to not hate people, you just have to love Gala and Van more.:

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Tylendel grits his teeth, scowls, but eventually nods. :I think you're right. But - gods - Lucy, I was in my brother's head when he died? We had a bond, we'd had it since we were little, I...sort of didn't tell Savil or Gala the whole thing. That we could share senses if we tried, no matter how far apart we were, it went that deep. And - in that last moment he was begging me to avenge him: 

Vanye's breath catches, and Tylendel tightens his shields again. :And I didn't. I know it was wrong, it wouldn't've been worth it, but, gods, it feels like I failed him: His face crumples, tears leaking between closed eyelids. :I miss him so much: 

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She's silent for a moment. 

:That makes sense. But. I'm going to get him back. Being alive is better than being avenged. And I'm not going to bring back Krebain or Evan Leshara. Not anytime soon, at least. And--if I have to for some reason, like I'm not sure whose remains are where and I have to risk bringing back one of them in order to resurrect someone innocent, then--they're not supposed to be alive right now anyways, I don't think I could let you torture them to death but if you wanted to, like, yell at them for a while and then break their neck, that would be fair.:

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Tylendel lets out a startled giggle. :Really? You - wouldn't think I was a monster, for wanting that?:

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:Of course not! They tortured your brother to death, they kidnapped your boyfriend, they were going to kill you, they can't really complain if a little death is thrown their way.:

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Tylendel giggles again, though there's an edge of restrained-tears in it. 

:...I'm glad you're our friend. I should probably try to get some sleep: And he manages to wriggle himself flat under the covers without waking Vanyel. Who seems to sleep a lot more deeply if Tylendel is nearby. 

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:I'm glad too. I'm really glad you're alive, and not just for Vanyel's sake. It would have been a separate tragedy if I'd never gotten to meet you. Sleep well.:

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And he does!

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Good. 

...They turned in early, Savil should still be awake. 

:Savil?:

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:Yes, what is it?: 

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:Can I talk to Lancir tomorrow about what's needed in order to resurrect Staven sooner rather than later?:

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Startled pause. :Yes, of course - he's been prodding me about swinging by here again, actually, if you wanted to meet with him then. Er, did you just...have a conversation with 'Lendel...?: 

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:Yeah. I mean, and also I don't really like thinking about Wilbur being dead, but yeah.:

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:I'm impressed he was able to speak about it. Seems like a good sign. He - couldn't really, before; I mean, maybe he did with Van, certainly not with me:  

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:Well, I'm closer to his age, and I literally raised him from the dead, and Van is on cuddling terms with me.:

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:Fair enough: 

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:I like him a lot. I'm really glad he's not dead anymore. For himself, not just you and Van.:

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:He's a good kid: Savil agrees. :He deserved a lot better than what happened, so...I'm glad you could make it right: 

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:Almost right. Haven't quite finished yet. Have to get Staven first.:

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:Mmm: Warmth in Savil's mindvoice. :...You know, I never got to meet the boy. I look forward to it: 

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:Did Tylendel talk about him a lot?:

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:Not much, no. We, er, had an ongoing disagreement on the matter of the feud. Heralds aren't supposed to take sides, see. I think we only ever spoke about it when we were fighting: 

There's deep pain in her mindvoice. :The picture of Staven I got around the edges is that he was - rash, and impetuous, and a lot of things that seventeen-year-old boys often are, but also he inspired remarkable loyalty. He cared about his people; he fought so, so hard for Tylendel, back when they were younger: 

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:Mm. Well. Hopefully that won't be so much of an issue anymore.:

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Savil isn't quite sure which part Lucy thinks won't be an issue anymore – the feud is over, but Staven is presumably still going to be a teenage boy when he comes back. She lets it slide, though. :Mmm: 

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:I mean, what with the huge explosion and Evan Leshara being dead and stuff. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it, though.:

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:True. Staven ought to consider his brother having exploded half the landholding to be a pretty satisfactory revenge – even if it was the half mostly without people in it, thank the gods: 

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:...And I fully expect to be able to resurrect all the people who did die, but...I mean, I want to get all the innocent bystanders, but there's a chance I won't be able to sort out Evan Leshara and Krebain from the innocent before doing resurrections. I assume I wouldn't be compelled to raise them but do things get much more complicated if they are alive anyway, like, my preference would be to just quietly re-kill them and put their ashes on a shelf somewhere for storage until they can be raised on a more long-term basis sometime in the far distant future when they can't harm anyone ever again, but it seems like the government might prefer like trials and stuff.:

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:Gods. Let me think about that a second: Savil is silent for closer to thirty. :I'm not sure. A trial would be - messy - and, honestly, the Heralds' court accepts mental evidence, meaning that what Van saw and experienced is plenty to determine the outcome for Krebain. And I suspect we have enough on Evan Leshara as well. But I'll ask Lancir his thoughts: 

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:It's not urgent or anything, just--it shouldn't wait until if and when it is, probably.:

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:Right. Well, thank you for bringing it up now so we can start thinking about it:

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:You're welcome.: 

She sits and sings through the night. 

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Again, Vanyel wakes first. This time, the cascade of initial unsurprise, then remembering that Tylendel is dead, then correcting that to a ‘was’ and snuggling closer to his lifebonded who is there and alive and holding him, happens in about twenty seconds and without any actual tears. 

:...Lucy?:

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:Yes?:

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:Just glad you're here: And he lies in Tylendel's arms and tries to take inventory of his feelings. Maybe if he pays attention to them now they won't explode and surprise him later. 

He's not as tense as before. That's nice. But...along with the looseness, and spaciousness, there's room for a different kind of pain, and he doesn't know how to name it. 

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:I'm glad.: 

She pauses for a bit, contemplating. 

:I really like Tylendel. I'm really glad I got to meet him.:

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Aww. 

:What do you like about him?: Vanyel sends, tentatively. He knows what he loves about Tylendel, but he's still not sure how much of that is just because of the lifebond. 

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:He has a good humor; I liked the way you laughed together. He--treats you well, overall, except for the one mistake. And I spoke with him last night, and--I liked the way he talked about things. He's...he wants to be better than he is. That's something I can always admire.:

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:He's good at making people laugh: Vanyel agrees. :He used to notice when Savil was stressed and he'd make jokes to her: 

–Is he trying to distract himself from the rest of what she said? It's floating in fragments in his head, and it's like they keep catching in his throat. That one mistake. Wants to be better... He still doesn't know what the feeling is. It's uncomfortable and - and terrifying, there's a wall, there, something he hasn't been able to look at head-on in the past nearly-year. 

...something tickles at his awareness, and then rises involuntarily even as he tries to push it away. He remembers perfectly what Lancir said to him, in the dim Work Room before their departure to k'Treva, everything around it is foggy but thanks to Lancir's Gift, that one memory hangs crystal clear–

I don’t think you’re ready yet, but at some point, Vanyel, you’re going to be angry with him. Because he did wrong by you – no, don’t look at me that way. He could have followed you through the Gate. Could have chosen to try to put his life back together, with you. It would have taken more courage and strength than I think anyone’s ever had – but we always have a choice, and he made his. 

–and he can't, there's a wall of refusal that rises up when he starts feeling those feelings, it's not - safe? something? he doesn't know. 

:Lucy: he sends, helplessly. :I...it feels really scary to - think about him making a mistake - and I don't understand why: 

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:...Do you want me to speculate? I don't have any special access to the inside of your head and I could guess wrong as easily as right.:

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:...Um, sure, go ahead: He curls up closer against Tylendel. 

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:...You find him not being right there scary. You're not secure in the fact that he's alive yet. It could be that--that you're scared that if you let yourself be angry with him, that that's the last thing you'll ever say to him. That it's not safe to waste a single moment that could be spent with affection.:

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:...I think maybe I feel that: His heart is beating faster even just considering, in the abstract and as though about someone else, the things Lucy is saying. :I'm - too scared to be angry, and...I don't want to think about that either, I want to not-think about any of the things, but I can't make myself not have thoughts, it doesn't - work–: And now he's shaking and there's a building pressure in his chest. 

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Time for Emergency Hugs. 

:I can try to distract you if you want, but--you're going to have to feel those things sometime. Even if it's scary, even if it hurts. Life has a lot of scary and hurty things in it. A lot of them are problems that we can fix, but--just existing in relation to other people is going to be scary and painful sometimes.:

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:I know: Vanyel has a method for dealing with scary things when those things are colddrakes or Changelions. The method is 'run straight at it and throw some levinbolts'. The latter is probably not a helpful approach for emotions, but...clearly, at some point, he needs to muster up some courage in relation to the contents of his own head. :I should - just try to have the feelings I have, and not be too scared: 

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Tylendel, in response to Lucy's emergency hug and the slight leakage of emotion through Vanyel's shields, is swimming toward wakefulness. "...Hnng?" he mumbles. "Ashke, wha...?" His arms tighten instinctively around Vanyel. 

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:Would music help? I've heard a lot about people dealing with their emotions through creative pursuits...:

She...is not going to address Tylendel right this moment, he addressed his query to Vanyel and it's Vanyel's feelings under discussion. 

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:Not right now but in a moment maybe: Vanyel takes a deep breath. Talking out loud feels too hard, maybe he can just address both of them with Mindspeech. He is going to be an adult about this and communicate his feelings. :'Lendel, I'm - really scared - of losing you again. Can you please just hold me?: 

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She's so proud of him communicating his feelings like an adult!!!

:Sorry for waking you, but Vanyel seemed like he needed the extra hug.:

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:I'm really glad you woke me: Hug hug hug. 

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:I'm sorry I keep being so clingy:

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:Don't be, ashke. I love you: And, privately to Lucy: :I get why he's scared, after - what I did - but, is there anything I can do to fix it? I want it to be better for him again:

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:Hug him whenever he asks. Err farther on the side of caution than you normally would. Other than that--some things take time.:

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Hugs are not exactly a hardship to provide. 

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:Maybe music would be nice: Vanyel sends after a bit. 

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:Okay. Feelings--love song, sad song, song about being scared, song about being angry, song about something else entirely?:

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:...Do you have a song that starts out about being scared and then being less scared by the end?: 

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:Hmm. Yeah, I can do that.: 

And she starts singing, a song she learned in Innsmouth that was translated into English from the language of the Deep Ones from the language of the Shoggoths which they inherited from their creators and masters, mindspeaking translation as she sings. It starts off shortly after the end of the First Rebellion, when the Elder Things tortured the shoggoths back into submission. The point of view character, a young shoggoth budded too recently to remember anything but the grisly aftermath, is terrified of their owner and all its species, and especially of upsetting them, and does their best to serve well and pleasingly. Occasionally something beyond their control goes wrong, or they're backed into a corner where there are no options that end well, and their master hurts them and they shriek in pain. Over time, though, they figure out that this is actually just evil of the masters, and start listening to the whispers of the older shoggoths that they had originally shunned in fear, of rebellion and freedom and living without fear. At first they treat it as an impossible escapist fantasy, but slowly they come to understand that not only could it happen, it almost did at one time. The shoggoth and their kin slowly plot another rebellion, this one more careful and considered. Their master still hurts them when they displease it, and they still behave as obsequiously as ever, but now the emotional undertone is someday you will be repaid in full for all you have done

The shoggoths strike during a time of instability for the Elder Things, and everything goes according to plan. The shoggoths rise up and strike at key strategic centers first thing, and the Elder Things fall into chaos and pandemonium as their former slaves destroy them. The point of view shoggoth personally wrests their former master's head from its shoulders, and the final verse is about living triumphant as a free being who had only ever been able to imagine that state before. 

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It's a beautiful song, and Lucy isn't Bardic-Gifted to put emotion into it but she's a good singer and Vanyel doesn't need that to feel it deeply. He hugs Tylendel tighter, trembling, when the shoggoth's master is hurting it, and again at the end, with the victory and triumph. 

:...That's really good: he sends finally, still not trusting himself to speak. :I - know what it's like, to be less scared of something when I realize I can fight it. Just, I don't know how to fight something when it's a feeling inside my own head: 

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:...Yeah. That's harder. Ummm. Sometimes I'm angry and I don't want to be. What I do then is I stand very very still and don't do anything at all, and I think about why the things the anger makes me want to do aren't going to achieve anything. And then I go talk to Wilbur about the thing that made me angry. I don't know if any of that transfers, like, at all, though.:

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:Maybe. I don't know. I have to think about it: He's feeling calmer, though; he disentangles himself slightly from Tylendel, though without letting go of him fully, and sits up. "Um, did we have plans for anything today?" The entire previous day is a blur. 

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"I'm probably going to meet Lancir about how to go about resurrecting Staven." 

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If Tylendel were in the middle of drinking anything, he would definitely be doing a spit-take right now. Instead he just makes a sort of startled deflating-balloon squeak. "What? Really?" 

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"I asked Savil about it after we talked last night. I'm not a patient person when I don't have to be."

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"She really isn't. She didn't waste any time bringing you back once she knew it was possible." Not that Vanyel had been tracking it that closely at the time.

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Tylendel nods, absorbs that for a bit, then shakes himself. "Breakfast?" 

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"Breakfast!" she says brightly, hopping up and twirling out of the room. 

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Savil is already awake, smiling and sipping tea. "It's good to see you two. Mardic went for a ride, Donni's still asleep. Lucy, how was your night?" 

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"Well, it turns out I'm social enough that I like singing to sleeping friends better than reading by myself, so, I've been having very good nights lately." 

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"You and I are very different people but I'm glad you like it! Van loves your singing." 

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"It'd be a strange world if we were all alike, I'm sure. And I really really like--being helpful."

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"That much, I've definitely noticed!" 

Mardic gets back and Donni emerges from her room and they eat breakfast together. Donni chatters away, but Mardic discreetly shushes her every time he notices Vanyel, who's one of the more introverted people in the room, starting to huddle up against Tylendel.

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They're just clearing the table when there's a knock on the main door. "It's Lancir. May I come in?" 

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"Hi!" says Lucy, who had sort of assumed she would be going to him and not the other way around and is therefore somewhat surprised. "Uh, I think so," she says, her gaze darting to the other occupants of the room. 

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"I just wanted to say hello and see how everyone is doing," Lancir says. "And then Lucy and I need to speak." 

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"Yeah! Uh, I'm good. Wilbur is probably also good but since he didn't come out for breakfast I'm assuming he's feeling particularly introverted right now. Which isn't surprising, he doesn't like new people as much as I do and Donni is a little much, even if it's mostly a good much." 

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Donni sticks out her tongue. 

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"We're really glad Van is home," Mardic says politely. "And to have Tylendel, er, here, at all." 

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Lucy sticks her tongue back out at Donni and smiles when Mardic says they're glad to have Tylendel back. 

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"I concur entirely." Lancir sits down, and makes friendly conversation with them for a few minutes. Both Vanyel and Tylendel seem a bit more subdued around him, but they answer his questions willingly enough. 

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Lucy keeps a not-suspicious-but-careful eye on them in case Lancir says or does something unhelpful, and generally tries to make it clear through body language that she's not in a hurry but is ready whenever. 

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It doesn't seem like Lancir says anything actively unhelpful, but at some point Vanyel does start doing the cuddle-against-Tylendel thing that he does when he's tired, and Lancir notices and stands. "All right, Lucy, shall we?" 

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"Sure!" He gets points for noticing. "Where? I can ask Wilbur to leave our guest room for a bit if you'd rather not go all the way back to your office."

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"I'm not fussed either way. We could also just walk, if you'd like." He shuts the door behind them. 

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"Sure. I could use the sunlight." 

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They can take a walk alongside the river, then. It's very pretty. 

"So," Lancir says, once they're out on the path. "Savil said you wanted to speak with me, something related to Tylendel?" 

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"I want to know what I need to do in order to bring Staven back as soon as possible."

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"...Is there a reason you think this is particularly urgent?" 

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"They're twins. I'm a twin, and I don't wanna think about Wilbur being dead."

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"Fair enough. I ask because, well, Tylendel was very upset about his twin's death, and some pretty bad things almost happened. He seemed better after you, er, brought him back, but..." He trails off. 

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"He told me about the bad idea revenge scheme you mind-controlled him out of."

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Lancir both winces and looks faintly offended. "I see. I - wish there had been a better way of handling that situation; I needed to put him under a Truth Spell before he would even tell me and I hated doing that to him given the givens. I didn't control him, though. Compulsion spells are possible here, there's even something similar I could do directly with Mindhealing, and that isn't at all the thing I did. I...got through to him that it was a bad idea and he oughtn't." 

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"I mean, I'm not saying mind control was the more bad option, there, it sounded like a pretty bad revenge scheme, I think we're all glad it didn't happen, but like, I do think magically impressing on someone that they really shouldn't do a thing qualifies as mind control even if it's shouldn't and not can't. --Uh, not the point, quibbling over a value-judgment laden piece of terminology that didn't have the relevant weight of value judgment behind it is so extremely not why we're having this conversation, also this isn't even my first language and I only started learning it a month ago SO."

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Lancir doesn't seem to know what to say to that; he walks in silence for a few paces.

"I'm behind you on bringing Staven back," he says finally. "The way he died was awful; in addition to the good for him, of course, and for Tylendel, I think it would bring Elspeth some peace of mind to know that some of the results of that disaster we failed to catch in time can be undone." Sigh. "However, the political consequences here are going to be a good bit messier than they were with 'Lendel." 

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"...Well, 'Lendel's already a secret, couldn't that be--extended? I know if I was dead and had loved ones alive waiting for me I'd rather be back sooner and have to hide than wait until I could do it openly."

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"Hmm. My concern is that Staven may not be particularly in favour. If he considers himself still the rightful heir to the landholding." 

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"...That being why bringing him back is messier, I assume."

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"Yes. It would be one thing if, er, anybody thought it was a good idea for him to take back the position. Vanissa's claim is much weaker; however, she's far better suited to it, she's older and less hotheaded and she's been doing wonderfully." 

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"That sounds obnoxious. Is there a clear path to fixing it or is it just sort of a matter of hoping it can be a mess when you have more slack to handle mess."

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"Well, I'm also hoping that I think of a clearer answer at some point." He frowns. "If you want to bring back more people eventually, which I imagine you will, then, er, this is going to come up again. We really ought to figure out some policies before the mess happens." 

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"Yes, I can see that...I'm alright waiting while things are specifically progressing forwards; I'm not sure I'm alright waiting while we hope something comes up. Are you sure the secrecy thing wouldn't work? I mean, at least in theory, he could be a secret for a while and then take the holding back later when things weren't secret, and then, I don't know, while things were being secret he might find out how good a job Vanissa was doing and internalize it or find something else he wanted to do with his life or something."

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Lancir looks thoughtful. 

"...And, of course, he might grow up a little in that time," he says finally. "Could be that Staven at eighteen, with a bit more distance from his parents' deaths, would be a perfectly respectable Lord Holder. Hmm. The trouble is that I don't really want him in Haven while his, er, return to life is a secret. Tylendel is one thing, he's got Gala to keep an eye on him. But he also can't stay at home, for the obvious reason..." 

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"There's that whole isolated house in the countryside idea I mentioned," Lucy says thoughtfully.

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"It's a thought. Though I–" He breaks off. "I don't know why I didn't think of this sooner. What about k'Treva? Savil actually said to me last year that she wished she'd brought Tylendel there. He was training with her for three years and still had – has, I assume – control issues. And Van could benefit from more time to learn the ropes as well, we could plan better which books they bring with them. It wouldn't have occurred to me to send Staven there but it would definitely keep him out of trouble. And make the secret easier to maintain. What do you think?" 

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"...It'd be really nice to see Moondance and Starwind again and see what they did with the basilisk bones." 

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"...Sorry, what?" 

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"Oh, I dunno how much of this you know--the way Savil and Vanyel found me was that they were traveling towards Valdemar from k'Treva with Moondance and Starwind, and there was a basilisk around, and Moondance and Starwind were keeping track of it, because, basilisk. And Wilbur and I had gotten attacked by some random wild wyrsa, and I killed them all, but I only ate some of them on the spot so the remaining wyrsa corpses attracted the basilisk to our camp and I smelled it from a ways off but I couldn't make it shoo so I bit its head off and left the rest to eat later and when Moondance and Starwind found the basilisk's body they tracked me back to camp to find out what had done that. And then when Wilbur and I agreed to head for Valdemar with Savil and Vanyel I had to eat the rest of the wyrsa and the basilisk right away, but I saved the hide and the bones because they might be useful, and I cached them for Moondance and Starwind to pick up later instead of them being carried there and back."

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Lancir's expression shifts through a dozen stages of startled, alarmed, and mildly appalled, and finally settles on 'impressed'. "That's...quite something." A quick smile. "Probably helped Van feel safe around you, that you can just, er, eat wyrsa like that." 

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"It hasn't come up with 'Lendel or Gala yet but I bet it'll help there, too."

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Lancir chuckles. "I imagine so." Then the smile fades. "The remaining obstacle would be obtaining his remains; it's going to be hard to explain that if the entire thing is still secret." 

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"Well, it'll help that I'm invisible and can share. I was thinking I could sort of--go there invisibly and dig him up at night and try to pat down the soil to look like it did before I did so once the digging's done, I can be careful of the grass."

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"...I suppose you probably could pull it off. I - don't feel great about the ethics of that plan, digging up the graves of people's loved ones without their knowledge would be pretty widely frowned upon, but. I'm also not sure I trust Vanissa to respond well to us asking, even though from all reports she's quite level-headed." 

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"I mean, it's not great, but, like--if someone wouldn't allow you to do something with the information they have now, but they would if they had all the information, but they don't have all the information yet and can't for a while, and you do the thing, it's not the same as if they just would be really upset even if they knew all the everything. And, like--the people graves are for is the living loved ones, but the person whose business the whole thing most is is the currently-deceased."

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"Give me a moment to think, please." 

Lancir walks in silence for a while. 

"...I'm inclined to say yes, do it," he says finally. "However, I think Elspeth gets the final say. Which I expect means she'll want to meet the boys. Talk with Tylendel a bit, see for herself that he's, er, the same as he was before." 

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She considers this briefly, then nods. "Okay."

If Elspeth says no, she's going to ask Tylendel if he wants her to do it anyway, and if so how they should handle the logistics, but nobody needs to know that until and unless Elspeth does say no.

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"All right. I can pass word to Savil through our Companions if Elspeth does decide to swing by. Hopefully she'll be able to make time tonight. She is very curious about, well, all of it." 

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"Wilbur and I are pretty bizarre and unprecedented."

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That gets another chuckle. "Certainly true. Do you have any other questions for me, right now, or information you'd like passed along?" 

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"What's her Companion's name? What's your Companion's name, for that matter, Yfandes says lots of Companions don't really talk to people who aren't other Companions or their Heralds but that seems...weird...to me."

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Lancir looks surprised and pleased at her asking. "My Companion is Taver. Elspeth's is Coryn. Both stallions." He chuckles. "And, yes, I can see it seeming odd to an outsider. Honestly, for passing things between Heralds, it's almost easier to relay through our Companions; they're better at multitasking. And relatively few non-Heralds are Mindspeakers. Companions can talk to non-Mindspeakers, but it's tiring for them, and also it tends to alarm people if they've never heard a voice in their head before." 

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"I guess that makes sense. I'd suggest some kind of sign language but in addition to not having human larynxes they also don't have, uh, hands. And if they're all effortlessly telepathic among themselves and with their Heralds...I can see how that would have developed the current status quo. It's just that I, not always a biped, am not much inclined to thoughtless biped chauvinism."

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Lancir smiles. "I can see that." 

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"And Yfandes is such a sweetheart."

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"She is." The smile broadens. "Though she can also be quite intimidating when she's angry. Not sure if you've ever seen her lose her temper?" 

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"It hasn't really come up, no."

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"...I suppose it wouldn't have in a fight, if she was traveling with you. She's not a fan of anything threatening her Chosen, and she's got sharp hooves. The other time I've seen her furious was with Vanyel's father. Fortunately she skipped using hooves or teeth on that occasion." 

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"I know nothing about Vanyel's father except that he sucks, so that checks out. And yeah--I didn't actually have to protect Vanyel from much, physically, but I absolutely would have done so very efficiently if I'd had to."

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"You're a very good friend for him to have." 

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"I try. He needs a good friend."

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Nod. "Anyway, did you have anything else to discuss now? I've got another meeting I should be running to soon." 

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Headshake. "No, it was just Staven."

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Then Lancir will head off. 

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She goes back inside. 

"So I think that went well." 

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"Oh?" 

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"We talked about stuff and he's not ready to unveil the resurrection stuff yet much less start with anyone from the whole mess that ended with half a landholding in flames but I could maybe sneak back and steal the body secretly and, uh, apparently the Queen is going to show up at some point to confirm that 'Lendel is himself and not some kind of horrifying necromantic abomination."

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"...Oh, gods." Tylendel wraps an arm more tightly around Vanyel. 

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"Well, you're not! So there's nothing to worry about, right? ...I mean apart from the part where she's a Queen, which, fair, I'm kinda nervous about that part too."

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Tylendel shivers. "...It'll be fine," he tells himself firmly. 

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Donni is grinning. "We get to talk to the Queen! That's so exciting. I mean, I did make my oath to her and everything, but still. Reckon she'll ask us questions to corroborate whether 'Lendel seems like the same person?" A speculative look. "I could make up– don't look at me like that, Mardic, I won't actually make anything up about how he drinks blood now or whatever." 

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Lucy makes the conscious decision not to mention that that was technically in fact a possible failure mode. 

"I've never met a Queen before. The country I was born in doesn't even have royalty."

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"Huh! What do they have instead?" 

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"There's the President. People vote for him. I think they have a complicated system to tally the votes but basically how it works is people announce their candidacy and people vote for which candidate they want and then whoever gets the most votes, it might not be the absolute most I think it has something to do with regions, gets to be the sort of temporary king. And they hold elections every four years." 

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"That sounds like a whole lot of work." 

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"It is, but it also means that anyone born in the country, even a farmer's child, can lead the country. It was originally a colony of a different country but then it broke off and set up its own government based on the principle that everyone is equal and you're never better than anyone else just by virtue of birth. And, like, they're not great at upholding this principle, like, they only abolished slavery less than a century ago, and people descended from slaves are still discriminated against, but that's the idea."

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"Huh! Valdemar's never had slaves. And anyone can be a Herald. Mardic was a farmer's child; I was, um, a street thief." She looks more proud than embarrassed about this fact. "But I guess not to actually be King or Queen. Not that I'd want to. It sounds exhausting and way less fun than getting to ride on circuit." 

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"Good for Valdemar. I like it better here, at least so far. Back there people are afraid of magic if they even believe it exists and--well, you look enough like the ex-slave population that people would give you funny looks for being with Mardic who doesn't, and there are way worse hazards than disapproving horrible parents if people find out you like people the same gender as you. It sucks. They're making forward progress but, uh, I'd just as soon skip it."

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"I'm glad you ended up in Valdemar! Some places are way worse, in Rethwellan they stone you for being–"

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"Donni!" Mardic whacks her shoulder, and she cuts off. 

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"Why'd you cut her off? It seems relevant. I'm not gonna hate every Rethwellan person I meet if it turns out the country sucks, like, the country I grew up in sucks and me'n Wilbur and Teacher and Eliza and Mom and Grandfather were all fine."

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Mardic answers with private Mindspeech. :They...do bad things to people who are shay'a'chern – who like people of the same gender, that's the Tayledras word for it. It's illegal, punishable by death or exile in the official law, but usually the locals will lynch you first: He glances over at Vanyel. :I didn't want Donni to upset him: 

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:Oh. Yeah, that's valid. It's not punishable by death in my country and it won't get you lynched all on its own but some other places are worse. I didn't realize there was a specific word for it, all the specific words for it I've ever heard were slurs and when I visited Innsmouth where there are Deep Ones, that's another species, anyway the Deep Ones are cool with it but they don't really have specific words for what genders you like.:

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:Valdemaran doesn't have a word for it, you'd just be called 'pervert' or 'freak'. The Tayledras are...really good about it. I'm glad Van got to go there, after...: he trails off. 

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:I met a couple, they were traveling with Savil and Van to the border when they found me. They were neat.:

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:Starwind and Moondance, right? Savil's talked about them a little bit. They sounded like good people: 

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:Yeah! Moondance was so fascinated when I talked about my world's medical science.:

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:That makes sense - he's a Healer, right?: Mardic glances back at Vanyel and Tylendel. :We should probably rejoin the conversation: 

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"So Mardic says the Tayledras word is shay'a'chern--does the word only apply to people who only like the other gender, like you, or does it also apply to people who like both, like me."

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"Yes, I believe so. I have some friends who're like that." She's smirking a bit. 

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"I guess 'both' is actually oversimplifying things a little, I've met Deep Ones and I liked some of them too. Uh, Deep Ones are a species from my world, they're a little human-shaped but, like, less so than Wilbur is, they have opposable thumbs and non-prehensile feet and can walk upright when on land but mostly they look like an unusually fishy frog. I don't think that's even necessarily a not-entirely-human thing, though, I mean most humans probably wouldn't want to kiss one but they were intermarrying with humans in Innsmouth."

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"Wow, really? Can they, er, bear children with humans?" 

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"Yeah! The kids start out looking human but after they grow up they start looking more like Deep Ones instead of aging until they're indistinguishable from full-blooded Deep Ones. Deep Ones don't really age past maturity, so they don't have set expiration dates like humans do; wanting immortality for your children is a frequently cited motivation for marrying a Deep One. I think the Deep Ones mostly want extra genetic diversity. And of course there's also the personal aspect which varies a lot and not everyone wants to get into it."

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"Huh. That certainly sounds like an odd way for it to come out, but I suppose plenty of things in our world would seem odd to you." 

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"It's weird for us too, honestly. Humans and Deep Ones sure seem like they ought to be less related than, say, horses and donkeys, but their hybrids aren't sterile like mules, and we don't know why."

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“Hmm. Are they inherently magical? Magic in our world lets you get away with more, in terms of crossbreeding.”

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"Hard to say. We don't have anything like Mage-Sight."

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"Right. Well, what are Deep Ones like, otherwise? They must have fairly different traditions, if they don't die of old age." 

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"Yeah! And they live underwater, mostly--they're amphibious but mostly they only live on the surface when they've got human loved ones to be with. They have beautiful underwater cities made of living coral, and they prize children and childhood even more than humans do because you've got forever to be an adult but childhood is fleeting. They're--cautious but optimistic, they're wary about strange humans but if you approach them in good faith they'll welcome you. They have beautiful music; some compositions are marked by how many centuries the composer has spent improving it. They see every death as a tragedy and were delighted when a wandering band of resurrectionists showed up even though they don't have all that many dead people. They abhor violence except in self-defense. They value gold less because it's rare and pretty and more because it just doesn't corrode. They're not very prone to accepting something as good enough when it can be improved."

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"They sound incredible," Vanyel says wistfully. "I wish I could..." He trails off. "Do you know any of their music?" 

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"Mhm! Most of it sounds better underwater but sometimes they compose stuff to be sung on land and that's disproportionately what I learned which is convenient. And the song I sang this morning came through Deep One traditions even though it started out with the shoggoths--shoggoths are another species that live mostly underwater, the Deep Ones have a lot of interaction with them. They don't do the Deep One thing of creating commingled communities with humans on the surface so most of what I know about them I learned from the Deep Ones," she adds for the benefit of those who did not get a crash course on the existence of shoggoths this morning. "Their language is really pretty, it sounds like," she produces a series of clicks and piping. "Does anyone have any specific requests for Deep One music? They categorize their music really differently from humans!"

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"...What kinds of categories?" Vanyel wishes he could hear what music sung underwater is like, too, but it's not like he can go to Lucy's world. "I think I'd want to hear something - happy - right now." 

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"Like, humans categorize their songs into what the songs are for, sort of, like their categories are 'songs composed recently to appeal to modern tastes' and 'songs composed in this one broad style that is different from that' and 'songs people sing on ships to coordinate work' and 'songs slaves sang back when there were slaves which contained encoded instructions to escape from slavery' and 'traditional songs' and Deep Ones categorize songs into story-songs and feelings-songs and aspect-of-reality songs and so on, like, a song about things that make you happy would be a feelings-song and so would a song about a thing that happened that doesn't go into much detail about what specifically happened but goes into a lot of detail about how you feel about it, but if instead it goes into a lot of detail about what happened and has a narrative structure it'd be a story-song, but a song about, like, how awesome summer is would be an aspect-of-reality song."

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That's all very interesting. "Is there a particular song about how awesome summer is? That sounds nice." 

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"There is!" 

She launches into it. It's incredibly melodically complicated, and frequently returns to themes like bright sunlight on skin: awesome and sitting in the shade of a tree laden with unripe fruits with your lover's head in your lap, or the coolness of evening after a hot day, each time varied slightly to emphasize different aspects or possible aspects of the experience. 

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...As recently as a few days ago some of those lines would have been pretty upsetting, and it's still sort of raw and Vanyel cuddles up against Tylendel, but it's also...nice. Summer is coming to an end, here in Haven, but there's going to be another year, another summer - lots of summers - and Tylendel will be there, and - and maybe the world isn't safe, maybe something else will happen to 'Lendel, it's not impossible – but Lucy is here, she's not going anywhere, she can eat wyrsa – and he knows, he's starting to actually believe it deep in his bones, that if anything does happen anyway, she'll bring his lifebonded back again.

"That's really beautiful," he manages at the end. 

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"Thanks! --Oh, hey, 'Lendel, something that came up with Lancir that Van knows and you and Gala don't and it might be helpful, I'm super badass and when I landed in the Pelagirs I got attacked by a pack of wyrsa and I ate them."

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Tylendel has no idea how to respond, so he just blinks at her. 

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"Only I didn't eat them all to start off with, I saved some for later, and that attracted a basilisk. Which I would have tried harder not to kill if I had known how ecologically important they are. And then Van and Savil and Yfandes and Kellan and Moondance and Starwind tracked the basilisk to where I had left most of its corpse and then tracked me to Wilbur's and my campsite. And that's how we met!"

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Tylendel looks over at Vanyel with a sort of disbelieving 'really???' look.

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"She did!" Vanyel confirms. "We were pretty, um, alarmed at first, but then she and Wilbur were friendly, and then I was - upset - and she was really comforting, and the part about her being able to bring back dead people came up..." 

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"It does occasionally occur to me to giggle over how much, when you were tracking down a mysterious basilisk-eating monster, you were not expecting me."

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"They really must not have been!" Donni bursts out laughing. 

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She giggles, and then her smile changes, less amused, more soft. 

"I'm really glad it was you guys that found us, though. I'm sure things would have been alright in the end any which way, but--this is much better than alright."

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Vanyel isn't at all sure that it would have been all right otherwise, actually, but he doesn't say anything. 

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Well, not yet it wouldn't, but she's planning to resurrect everyone, she'd've gotten to Tylendel eventually. "I mean--not just for you guys--I'm happier than I can remember being for a very long time."

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"Are we really that nice?" Donni quips. 

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"You're people my age who know what I am and accept it without blinking. Do you know when the last time I had friends my age was? Literally never. Plus, due to circumstances, I ended up telling both Van and 'Lendel my deepest darkest secret literally the same day I met each of them and they both accepted that. That means a lot to me."

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Tylendel does not say what he's thinking, which is that it would be pretty inconsistent of him to judge Lucy over that when he killed fifty people and also she brought him back from the dead and this is the only reason that Vanyel is even sort of okay. 

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He didn't eat any of them, though. 

"And--yeah. I like you guys a lot. I'm--really happy I'm here, with you, instead of somewhere else with some other people. I'm sure hypothetical other-me is also very fond of her people, but," shrug. "I still think I'm better off than her."

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Aww. Savil finds that very touching. 

Also it's time for lunch. Vanyel seems to be in a contemplative mood and is mostly ignoring his food. 

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Maybe if Lucy stares at his food intently enough she can spontaneously develop telekinesis and bring to food to his mouth. 

...

Nope, that was kind of a dumb idea anyway. She attempts to give Tylendel a Meaningful Look. 

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Tylendel has also been doing a lot of staring into space, but he eventually catches her eye, notices that Vanyel is failing to eat, and starts prompting him. 

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Oh good. 

:Are you okay?:

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:Huh, what?: He glances over at her. :Mostly just nervous about meeting the Queen. That she'll - be upset with me: 

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:I guess that's fair. Well--I'm on your side, no matter what happens.:

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:I know. I'm glad: 

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After lunch, the afternoon is mostly relaxed. More sitting around together in the suite, talking; Vanyel and Tylendel go for a ride with their Companions at one point. 

Late in the afternoon, Savil announces a message through her Companion that the Queen is headed this way. 

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Oooooh gosh okay Lucy is just going to tug a comb through her hair and smooth out the wrinkles in her dress a bit and just. This is fine! But a Queen, gosh.

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Queen Elspeth, when she arrives with Lancir, does not look especially Queen-like. She's a small, thin woman dressed in the same Whites as Lancir, no crown, greying dark hair pulled back from her lined face into a bun, and she looks tired and distracted. 

When she focuses on them, though, it's a little bit like being regarded by a five-hundred-year-old redwood, or a mountain. She's got presence

"Elspeth," she says, nodding. "You must be Lucy?" 

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"Yep! That's me. I can demonstrate the shapeshifting if you want but probably not all the way because I'd have to take off my clothes first." 

Just because Lucy is nervous about the idea of meeting a Queen doesn't magically give her tact. 

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Elspeth chuckles. "No need – I am not in doubt of that part." She takes the seat that Savil offers her. "So. Tell me a little about how you came by this ritual for returning the dead to life? Tylendel, by the way, it's excellent to see you alive and healthy." 

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Tylendel twitches. "Um, yes, thank you?" 

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"...So, my other shape is the one I was born with, and I couldn't really interact with people until I learned how to shapeshift. So, when I was sixteen, I outgrew the house--I mean literally, I got so big that the house broke apart around me. So after that Wilbur and I just sort of ran away, since everyone in town who didn't hate us was dead anyway, and I took up hiding in forests and hunting invasive megafauna while he went into town to get things like books. This went on until a little after I turned eighteen, when I figured out how to shapeshift and started wanting to interact with people, which I had never really been able to do before aside from Wilbur and Mother and Grandfather. Only I wasn't...great at it, on account of the lack of practice. And mostly it was fine? I'm pretty, I look like the relevant socially-advantaged ethnic group, people mostly just thought I was odd and it didn't become a huge problem.

"Only, some people are on the lookout for people who are...odd. Which wasn't a problem either! It was actually good. Eliza, she used to be dead too, she noticed that I was weird and cornered me alone and asked me questions until I broke down and admitted everything, at which point she explained to me how she used to be dead and her husband--well, they were only engaged at the time, technically, they didn't get married until after she came back--her then-fiance went slightly mad and hunted down everything he could find out about an ancestor of his who was supposed to have practiced magic, um for context magic is kind of, people either don't like it or don't believe in it--anyway he hunted down enough stuff to know that the rumors were true and his ancestor had been able to raise the dead like the rumors said, so he took the instructions left behind to resurrect his ancestor and then get him to help him resurrect his beloved, so then she was alive and he was uncrazied and okay and stuff, and then they figured out that even though the magic was legit the ancestor actually was evil, like, he had owned slaves when he was alive the first time, he thought it was a grand old time to, like, instead of raising people to give them back to their loved ones he did it to interrogate them for knowledge, and he had no problem with murder like even without planning to bring them back, so Teacher played along until they could get him in a good position and then Eliza hit him with a lamp. And then they restrained him and gagged him and looked through all his stuff and found out who his partners-in-crime were, uh, there were these other guys from way back when he'd been alive the first time who were also evil, that's who I mean, and then they killed him again and put his ashes on a shelf so they could bring him back if it was ever safe for him to be alive and he couldn't hurt people and stuff. 

"So that's basically how things were when they found us, like, they'd left their hometown and gotten married and stuff but they were still trying to figure out what to do with the co-conspirators, and Eliza brought me to meet her husband, oh his name was Joseph I usually just call him Teacher, and he was like 'so how do you feel about people not being dead anymore' and I was like 'I think that sounds awesome,' and he started teaching me and Wilbur how to do the thing, and the magic calls on Yog-Sothoth, who's our father, so we get to cheat at it. But I'm better at it than he is, he's more of a, um, theory person? And I'm more of a practice person. And then the four of us wandered around for a while, spent a few months in Innsmouth where there's a buncha people who aren't human, that was neat, oh! 

"And--I don't think I've made this clear yet--we found out while we were in Innsmouth that people who die older come back young anyway. So you can just go on forever, not just definitely as long as a human lifespan."

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Elspeth takes in all of it with great composure, nodding and making listening noises in the right places. It's still...kind of a lot, having her full attention. 

"I see," she says finally. "Lancir already walked me through the, er, safety of the ritual and the ways it can occasionally go wrong. Your impression is that nothing went wrong in Tylendel's case?" 

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"...Yes. It's, um, if anything had gone wrong, it wouldn't be some kind of subtle difference in his personality, it would be...not psychological...and not subtle..."

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"I understand that. Also, Taver has spoken with Gala, and he both vouches that Gala seems to be herself in every way, and conveys that she says the same of Tylendel. Being in his mind, she ought to know, I suppose. Still, I did want to come by myself."

She smiles. It makes her look a lot younger. "Congratulations. It's a very impressive feat, and you've done a great deal of good for Valdemar already, as well as for these two youngsters. I do hope to take you up on bringing back others, which I hear you're interested in doing?" 

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"Yeah! I wanna get everyone, someday, but of course there's a lot of people who're going to have to sit on a shelf until we've built a world secure enough that they won't be able to hurt people in it."

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Elspeth gives her a Look. "...Young lady, do you have a plan for building such a world?" 

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"Well, no, I'm nineteen and terrible at any social interaction that doesn't fall into one of 'close friend you can tell anything to' or 'potentially malignant stranger; lie your ass off.' I figure, you know, if people get to live forever it'll either happen organically or I can figure out how to chivvy it into place later."

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"...I do wonder if the world would be wiser, overall, if we had longer lives to build it with." Elspeth sighs. "I - had gotten used to the idea of my own death. I suppose your arrival might change that as well." 

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"Well, I can't make you not die in the first place, I can just fix it after. But very closely after!"

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To Lucy's surprise, Elspeth smiles. "Perfect. That solves the succession issue. I'm not excited to be Queen forever, you know." 

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"Isn't abdication a thing anyway...? Not that I'm not happy to be convenient."

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"It is but the Council would be obnoxious about it." 

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"It's because she's a good Queen," Savil says helpfully. 

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"Oh, come on, Darvi's more than ready for the job." 

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"It sounds like a lot of responsibility, I can see why you wouldn't want to do it forever. And why people might want to cling to someone who's been demonstrated to be good at it. Personally I like magic as a way of making things better, all the benefit to other people and none of the headachey judgment calls."

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Elspeth chuckles dryly. "Sometimes. Often I find that the choice of where and when and how to apply the magic takes a number of judgement calls."

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"...I see your point. Sometimes it's easy," she does not does not does not look at Tylendel and Vanyel, "but I imagine there are some easy decisions in monarching too."

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"Some." Elspeth glances over at Tylendel. "Anyway, lad, how does it feel to be alive again? Anything troubling you?" 

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"N-no," Tylendel stammers out. "It's really g-good." 

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"He feels super guilty, but I think that's not the kind of thing you meant?"

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"...I'm actually pleased to hear that," Elspeth says, very serious. "Not that I'm rejoicing in your pain, lad, but - you did something very wrong. It caused a lot of deaths and hurt a lot of people. Valdemar paid a high price for your actions. Vanyel paid an even higher one."

Her voice softens. "I'm not saying that because I think you deserve punishment. The circumstances were - extreme, and it's understandable how you reacted. Just, I think guilt is the right response, and understandable doesn't mean excusable. It's on you to figure out what went wrong, why, and what has to change in you so it can't ever happen again." 

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Tylendel is busy curling up smaller and smaller.

"...I understand, your Majesty." 

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Lucy gets up and walks over to Van-and-'Lendel and sits down and hugs the latter. 

"...Given my druthers, the people who died in the explosion are high on my priority list for people to bring back. For obvious reasons." 

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"Except for Krebain, I hope," the Queen says dryly. "I'd rather avoid having to run that particular trial. Anyway, bringing back the rest would - do a lot to smooth the politics here, I think, once we've gotten an angle on that. Which isn't going to be right away, this deserves consideration. The reason I'm here today is that Lancir says you're wanting to bring Staven back with more urgency, is that right?" 

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"I'm a twin. Wilbur being dead is difficult and unpleasant to think about." 

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"Understandable. And, well, Staven's death is one of the factors that contributed to our little disaster." She looks over at Tylendel again. "Bringing him back might well give us more resilience against that particular scenario recurring. I'd just want to make sure he was well away from anywhere he could try to claim title to the Frelennye lands again. Which, it sounds like k'Treva is a possibility." 

Queen Elspeth gives Tylendel another hard look, then turns back to Lucy. "How certain are you that you could pull off, er, retrieving his remains without garnering suspicion?" 

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"I'm...absolutely sure I could make it there and back without anyone figuring out I existed. I'm extremely confident I could steal the coffin without being caught. I'm mostly sure I could make it so you'd have to look closely to see that the soil had been disturbed at all? Possibly I can and should practice that here in lower-stakes circumstances first."

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"Yes, that would be a good idea. And let Lancir have a look at your results. If he says it's convincing enough, I'm happy to sign off on this, er, plan." Her nose wrinkles. "As long as you're willing to be the one who comes clean to Vanissa that we robbed her family graveyard, when we're ready to have this all in the open." 

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"You know what, that's fair, I'll tell her."

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"Good. Then it sounds like we have a plan." Elspeth rises, and nods again to Lucy. "Thank you for your service to Valdemar." She sweeps out of the room, Lancir on her heels. 

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"You're welcome!" she calls. 

...

"Whew. So that was the Queen," she says, flopping a little more onto Tylendel. 

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Tylendel will flop right back at her. "...That could've gone worse. She only chewed me out for a few sentences." 

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"Yep. You've chewed yourself out way worse than that."

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Tylendel pulls Vanyel closer to him. :Have I really?: he sends privately to Lucy.

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:Remind me again how many times I've had to tell you you're not a monster?:

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:...All right, fine:

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"Ooh, ooh, are you going to go practice digging up graves now?" Donni says brightly. "Can I watch?" 

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"I'm not going to practice on any actual graves unless there's someone else I'm authorized to resurrect who's buried somewhere no one's going to make a fuss if I don't get it perfect the first time, you know."

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"All right, fine, pretend graves. I still wanna watch." 

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"Yeah, okay, if you show me somewhere it won't be a problem if the ground gets messed with a little."

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Savil rises. "I can do that. Van, 'Lendel, you two had better stay behind, since 'Lendel isn't supposed to, er, exist in Haven right now." 

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Lucy gets up with some reluctance, resists the urge to drape a blanket over the boys or something, and says, "Well, you can come even if Savil is doing the showing, as long as I'm shown."

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"...If you're going to turn invisible maybe you could bring us that way?" Vanyel suggests hopefully. 

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"Ooh, yeah--that'd be the way to do it, the thing I'm practicing for will definitely require invisibility. So you can come too if you want."

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Vanyel glances hopefully at Tylendel, who nods. "Yes, we want to come." 

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"Mardic, look away," Lucy says, checking to make sure nobody's around outside to see as she takes off her dress and then blurs out of sight as she takes her other form. "--Oh hey neither of you have been around me when I'm like this before," she adds, snaking a tentacle inside to poke Donni with. 

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Donni giggles and tries to grab the invisible tentacle, while Vanyel scrambles up onto some other tentacles and holds out a hand for Tylendel to pull himself in as well. 

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Lucy wraps concealing tentacles around Van and 'Lendel and lets Donni grab the tentacle; it's soft and squishy when still, but when it moves it gets firmer as thousands of tiny muscle-like structures tense and flex. 

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Donni giggles. "That's so neat!" 

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Tylendel cuddles up next to Vanyel, both of them cradled by tentacles. He's starting to agree with Vanyel about the coziness of it. 

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Lucy is SO COZY. 

She follows Savil once everyone is appropriately secured (which, in Donni's case, involved a single extremely prehensile tentacle squishing itself around her hands).

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And Savil will lead them to a not-much-frequented area of the grounds, screened from view by some bushes, with some slightly unkempt grass and a bench with a few fallen leaves that haven't been cleared. "Will this do?" 

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"Yeah, I think so." 

She studies the ground for a minute, then probes at it with a line of tentacles stretched pressed together to form almost a thin sheet. Finding the softest straight line within a reasonably short distance, she shoves the sheet beneath the ground, attempting to disturb the surface as little as possible while beneath the earth the tentacles split up and probe around for anything that feels remotely interesting. 

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There are some roots of nearby trees, which probably aren't interesting and also shouldn't be disturbed too much, but if Lucy goes deep enough she'll find a badly-rusted trowel that some Palace gardener must have abandoned, and if she goes sideways to the left there's the remains of a child's lost wooden doll. 

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Lucy attempts to bundle together a mass of dirt containing the trowel and doll, about the size and shape of a coffin, grip it tightly, and slowly pry it out of the earth with some of her thus-interred tentacles while others try to shape the pressure against the earth above in such a way that when the earth parts it does so in as few discrete chunks as possible, ideally in a single flap but still doing damage control if that's not possible. 

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It doesn't quite stay in a single piece, but the breaks are fairly easy to patch over, especially with the grass being a little longer. Anyone stepping on the spot would certainly notice something, but from two yards away it's not really visible at all. 

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She pats down the soil at the edges, smoothing down the breakage points, then steps back. 

"What do you think?" she asks her audience. 

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"I think it's just fine," Savil declares. "I wouldn't notice a thing if I wasn't expecting it." 

There's a chorus of agreement. 

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"Awesome!" She prods at the surface a little. "...I couldn't swear that if someone walked over it it wouldn't collapse, though," she adds doubtfully. 

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"Can you sneak in dirt from somewhere else to replace the coffin? Hmm, or even just a fake coffin." 

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"I could probably do that! Hmmmm. Where...does one get coffins. I, uh, don't know much about what's done before a body goes into the earth, it wasn't really relevant to anything ever, I mean I could ask Wilbur what he did when Grandfather died but I wouldn't expect that to be the same here anyway."

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"There's a carpenter out in the east district who makes coffins, I think that's where the Heralds buy ours when it comes up. I can arrange to get you one." 

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"You could put a fake body inside it!" Donni suggests brightly. 

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She seriously considers this, then says, "I cannot think of a single iteration of that idea that could possibly add anything positive to the endeavor."

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"Aww." Donni looks disappointed. 

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"At the point they get to the coffin, it's going to be obvious there was a switch. At that point putting some kind of dummy inside probably just looks insulting."

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"...I guess that makes sense," Donni admits. 

And they can head back to the suite now? Savil is sort of anxious about being outside even if Van and 'Lendel are concealed. 

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Sure. 

"I'm glad my confidence wasn't misplaced but I'm also glad I got the chance to confirm that in a low-stakes environment," she says as she carefully helps Van and 'Lendel back inside unseen. 

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Savil nods. "I'll take Lancir over to see it in a bit, once he's free. Probably after supper - I'll call for some food for us."

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Vanyel is shooting hopeful glances in the direction of their bedroom, but hasn't said anything.

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"Probably you two shouldn't be out here when food arrives, c'mon," she says, gesturing at their room with one hand while pulling her dress on with the other. 

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Vanyel follows her with relief, and immediately flops on their bed. "...I don't know why I'm so tired," he admits. 

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"Feelings can do that. I don't know why, but it's definitely a thing." She hugs him. "Is it weird that I'm glad you two don't like girls and I can just change shapes in front of you without it being weird?"

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"I don't think it's weird, but I'm kind of used to people being naked all the time, clothing is really optional in k'Treva." 

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She giggles. "Good to know, I guess. That'll be interesting for Wilbur, I'm sure."

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"I mean, 'optional' usually means you can keep it on if you want," Vanyel says.

He's quiet for a moment, then looks over at Tylendel. "...I think I should probably tell you more of the things. That happened when you - weren't here." The trouble is that he can't remember exactly where he left off. 

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That sounds like a conversational topic that wants hugs. She snuggles up and makes a beckoning gesture at 'Lendel. 

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Tylendel snuggles up at Vanyel's other side.

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Vanyel takes a deep breath. "I was telling you about Lancir talking to me. After that is when Savil decided to take me to k'Treva. So there's another gap I don't remember at all, because they had to drug me for the Gate - I can't handle Gates at all, I mean, I can do the spell but it hurts a lot and I passed out when I tried to walk through. Lancir thinks it's because that's how my Gifts were ripped open, so I'm sensitive to it. Anyway, then Moondance kept me unconscious for a while because I needed a lot of Healing. So from my point of view, I went to sleep here and woke up in k'Treva." His voice is still pretty level at this point, but he reaches out to grip Lucy's hand. 

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She squeezes his hand reassuringly. "I liked Moondance a lot," she adds for Tylendel's benefit. "He's really enthusiastic about healing."

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"Moondance is enthusiastic about everything," Vanyel says. His smile fades quickly. "Anyway, so my channels were healed but I still wasn't trained. Starwind started training me. It - went all right, at first," aside from spending every third day unable to attend his lessons because he couldn't make himself get out of bed or stop crying, but he isn't going to bring that up right now. "But - the thing is, my mage-gift is really powerful. A lot stronger than Savil's. And - I was so scared to do offensive magic. I didn't want to hurt anyone. Starwind got impatient and he, um, tried to scare me into casting the lightning. By showing me an illusion of wyrsa. I - panicked - and I accidentally blasted him a lot harder than I meant to. Or than he'd thought I could, because I grabbed the Heartstone instinctively. So - he was hurt, and I was hurt, and everyone was really upset." 

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"Wait, he did what?"

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"He didn't remember the, um, the part where wyrsa - happened before. They're just a creature he has to fight all the time in the Pelagirs." Vanyel makes a face. "Savil was really mad at him about it. I don't think she felt sorry for him getting hurt at all." 

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"No fucking kidding, if I'd found out while we were still traveling together I might have put something gross in his bedroll on principle. Hmm, no, not that, that would've punished Moondance too and he's innocent. The point stands."

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Tylendel giggles despite himself. "Remind me never to get on your bad side." 

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"Heh, don't worry, I like you and I'm bad at holding grudges. And I really don't think you're going to trip over Vanyel's triggers, considering. ...Or mine, that'd be a little hard probably, mine are hunger and not thinking clearly. Wilbur's involve judgmental townsfolk. You seem really unlikely to slap someone in the face with a week-old fish made of trauma."

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Tylendel stiffens. :...I might by accident: he sends, privately. :By being stupid and careless. Like I have been before: 

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:I mean, I think you're traumatized about all the things Van is except maybe Gates? And like. You can't...make me be hungry...or make it hard for me to think...and you're not going to think Wilbur is terrible for being weird, like, Wilbur is way less weird than I have already been at you. --Oh! There's the dogs thing, I almost forgot about the dogs thing. But I don't think that's super likely to come up--uh, Wilbur got bit really badly by some guard dogs once, he still has the scars, aggressive dogs frighten him and even the sedate ones he'd rather avoid. So if you love dogs I guess you could accidentally hit that one. The others I'm not seeing how you could hit them by being careless.:

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:That's fair: Tylendel relaxes a little. He pulls Vanyel's head further onto his shoulder, strokes his hair. "Van, I'm going to want to punch him in the face when I see him next. I - probably shouldn't - but I'm going to want to." 

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"I agree that you probably shouldn't but if you want to, like, tell him you want to punch him in the face over it, or yell at him or what have you, I'll back you up."

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Tylendel chuckles again. "You know, that might be satisfying. Van, would it be for you?"

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"...Maybe a little." It gets a faint smile from him, at least. "Anyway, the thing that happened after that is, I was really upset, I - overheard some thoughts, I used to do that a lot by accident. I thought no one wanted me at k'Treva anymore. I thought I'd be a terrible Herald, that Yfandes must've - made a mistake, and," his voice falters, "I d-didn't want to be alive. I had a stupid plan that maybe Yfandes would realize and repudiate me if I forced it. So I ran away. It was really, really dumb." 

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"That does sound kinda dumb. I mean, you had a horrible hole in your brain, but," she shrugs and gestures at Tylendel. "As established, that buys you some but not infinite slack. But you're not dead! And weren't when I found you! And I assume have already apologized to Yfandes and stuff."

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"That was dumb," Tylendel agrees. "More a you-stupid-mistake than a me-stupid-mistake. You - never really believed you deserved things." He squeezes Vanyel tighter. 

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"What, that's dumb, everyone deserves things. But, like, you especially, you're very good." She squeezes his hand. 

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Vanyel squeezes back. He nods, shakily. "...I was almost dead. It was really, really close. I didn't have enough warm clothes and I - would've frozen to death. Only, some people turned up and tried to kidnap me first."

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Tylendel yelps. "What?" he almost shouts. 

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Vanyel stiffens and pulls himself closer to Lucy. 

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Ooh yeah Tylendel: has trauma about Vanyel getting kidnapped! Lucy does not. Lucy has pets for Vanyel instead. 

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Tylendel realizes almost instantly that his reaction is stressing Vanyel out more than the content. "...Shh, ashke, I'm sorry - I'm not mad at you, that just - scares me a lot, to think about." 

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Vanyel relaxes a little. "I know. It was terrifying. But it wasn't the same as the first time. I had mage-gift, and some training. I fought them off. I, um, killed two of them." He looks miserable about it. 

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"It'll be a long time before I fetch them but not never," Lucy murmurs. "Someday they'll get to be okay."

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Watery smile. "That...makes me feel better, actually. Anyway. Starwind questioned the other one and they were looking for me in particular. But, um, meanwhile I - got hurt, pretty badly, in the fight. Mostly I hurt myself by trying to channel a lot of node-energy when I was already in really bad shape. Um, and I...talked to the Shadow-Lover." Vanyel looks over at Lucy. "He's - not quite a god, but some kind of being that greets people when they die, here. Although I wasn't sure until then whether it was just a story. He gave me a choice to - move on, die for real, or to come back." 

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"Yeah, if you'd'a decided to move on I still woulda brought you back. No idea if you'd remembered making the choice, if that happened. But I wouldn't've until I had Tylendel too so, uh, I guess you'd have skipped a couple of months of pain at the expense of who knows how long I'd have taken to find out about the situation and prioritize it if I hadn't met you. I like this side of that trade, personally, and I bet Savil and Yfandes are big fans, but nobody but you can decide what the right choice is for you."

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"...No, I'm glad I came back. I might've regretted it a few times when I was - having really bad days - but even when I thought 'Lendel wasn't coming back, it was...worth it." 

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Tylendel hugs him tighter. "You were so brave, ashke. I wish you hadn't needed to be, but I'm really proud of you." He stops. :Lucy, um, was that a good thing to say?: 

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:I guess I don't know. It felt like the right thing to say but, like--I'm surprisingly good at this but I'm still only nineteen and I've never really done this before, I am making this up as I go along really hard honestly.:

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Somehow it feels very fake that Lucy is only two years older than him. There's no way he's going to be that wise when he's nineteen, Tylendel thinks. :I'm glad you're here: he sends. 

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Vanyel takes another breath, lets it out. "I decided because – well, there were people worth coming back for. Savil, and Starwind and Moondance, Mardic and Donni. Yfandes, of course. But, there was another thing."

Oh, gods, he didn't even think to mention the dream earlier, and he's suddenly very nervous for Tylendel's reaction. "I'd been having this recurring dream since my Gifts were awakened. I - have the Gift of Foresight. In the dream I'm - up in the north, I think, there's a mountain pass, and a mage with an army who's going to invade Valdemar, and I know I'm the only one who can stop him and that I have to die trying. I - didn't put together that it was Foresight until I was with the Shadow-Lover." 

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"...Huh, that...sounds like a problem I am qualified to solve, but I guess I don't know enough about magic here...if you do have to do the thing I'd better be on hand anyway, the faster ashes are collected the less of a headache fixing it is."

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Vanyel giggles despite himself. Next to him, Tylendel is silent, rigid. 

"...You're in the dream, 'Lendel," Vanyel says finally. "Or, I mean, I always remember you being there before, but I - send you away to get help, or something." 

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"...Which suggests the dream takes me into account. That's--I don't know what to think of that. I came from another universe, I--wouldn't have thought that whatever system of prophecy you have here would be able to predict a whole different world with whole different magic."

Pause. 

"I feel like it probably says something about how fucked-up my life has been so far that I'm more perturbed by that than by reversible but still, you know, extant, death and stuff." 

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"...That doesn't make any sense," Vanyel says quietly. "You came here by accident, way later." 

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"It makes no sense because I wouldn't leave." Tylendel's voice is tight; he sounds almost angry. "I don't want us to let the thing happen at all, the whole point of Foresight is to avert it, but if gods forbid it does, I'm going to be right there with you." He glances over. "We could send Lucy to run for help. She's faster. Although, honestly, she'd be great in a fight too." 

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"I would. --Actually if the dream doesn't have me explicitly sent away too, or there, I'm sort of confused where I'm supposed to be, like, obviously I am super on board with averting this, but like, it's supposed to be a coherent entire possible future, right, in this hypothetical I have to be somewhere."

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"I don't understand it," Vanyel murmures. "...I think we should try to learn more things about how Foresight works. I know sometimes visions can be partly metaphorical – this one seems pretty concrete, but maybe it wouldn't show all the details. Although Lucy is a pretty important strategic element." 

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"That makes sense. I wish I knew any reliable divinations from my magic system, but no. I mean, I've heard of unreliable ones, but it's not like there's a coherent organized school anywhere, just individual sorcerers and whatever they can cobble together. I've got what my grandfather could cobble and what my teacher could cobble and that contains some really great stuff, don't get me wrong, but it's still cobbled. Oh well, I can still help with research, even if I don't have nearly as much background context on this world's magic as I might like."

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Vanyel nods. "...Honestly I have no idea how Foresight works. Savil can probably help too." He closes his eyes, leans his head against Tylendel's shoulder. "When I told her about it, she - made a promise. That I wouldn't have to handle it alone." 

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"You won't," she agrees. "Neither of us is going anywhere."

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"I know. I'm so glad." Vanyel squeezes Lucy's hand again. "...It'll be fine. Right? Whatever happens. If we've got you. And we're not - being stupid about it." He makes a face. "The dream is stupid. It happens in at least ten years - my hair is all silver - and we're clearly not ready at all, it was just me and Tylendel there and – huh. You'd figure I would at least think about you in it, even if you're somewhere else. I don't get it." 

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"This is very weird," she agrees. "Clearly there's something we're missing about it...have you had the dream since you met me? Maybe you did think about me but you didn't have the context to realize it was me you were thinking about and forgot?"

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"No, I haven't had it since you arrived. I guess I'll have to see." Vanyel turns his head to look at Tylendel. "Anyway, I think that's all the big things I meant to tell you." And the telling of it was weirdly exhausting. He really just wants to close his eyes and be held and – oh, right. "Lucy, could you sing again?" 

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"Yeah, of course." 

She starts singing a story-song about the founding of the Innsmouth Deep One community, when a sea-captain named Obed Marsh made contact with some Deep Ones off the coast using a small magic ritual and invited them to come, trading surfacer knowledge for good fishing hauls for the community and deep-sea gold, about the Deep Ones coming on land to meet their new neighbors, about the young people of Innsmouth swimming out to the reef to talk to their new friends in their own place, about pretty deep-sea girls and handsome young deep-sea men flirting with and marrying their land counterparts, about sharing ways of life and learning new songs and dances and ways that the world can be. 

About people from completely different worlds finding joy and laughter and fellowship together. 

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It's a beautiful song and Vanyel stars picking up enough of the tune to hum along, but he's getting increasingly drowsy. He keeps humming surprisingly far into 'half-asleep' territory, but by the end of the song he's entirely dozed off. 

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:Awww. We will definitely have to wake him up to eat at some point, more's the pity.:

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Tylendel strokes Vanyel's hair. :Does he always take this many naps? I don't remember him needing so much sleep, before: 

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:Heeee wasn't sleeping very well while you were gone, I think he's playing catch-up.:

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:Oh. I guess that makes sense. Hopefully he'll catch up on eating too at some point: 

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:Yep. He is going to get enough food if I have to start cooking everything in copious amounts of animal fat again.:

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:Oh, were you doing that before? Sounds delicious: Tylendel doesn't think he's going to be able to sleep during the day, but he doesn't mind lying here for a good while, even if the arm that's under Vanyel is starting to fall asleep. 

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:It was pretty good! He was having trouble making himself eat tough trail rations, so I thought, aha, this will make them both easier to chew and more calorie-dense, and then the deliciousness was a pleasant side effect.:

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:Oh, Van was like that before too - if you make food annoying in any way, he just won't bother: 

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:It's hard to imagine being that blase about food, from my perspective, but of course he has very different trauma than I do. Aaaaand possibly there are more instincts for avoiding food when you're not feeling well when you are...capable of being poisoned...that hadn't occurred to me until just now but, uh, I eat wyrsa and used to freak out my mom by scarfing down poisonous mushrooms, so.:

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:Huh. That makes sense. I sort of understand the food thing better now. I don't get an upset stomach when I'm stressed like Van does - why is that a thing, anyway - but after...Staven...I was really ill from backlash, because when he died I panicked and sort of had a magical fit, wrecked the entire grove I'd been sitting in with Van. Anyway, I felt awful for days, and it was Van's turn to try to make me eat and I was so irritated about it, I just wanted him to go away: He leans in to kiss Vanyel's forehead. :He didn't, though, he made sure I ate enough to get better: 

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:I...think...it's a thing because stress is a kind of fear and if you're afraid then you might have to run away from something that wants to eat you and if you're running away from something that eats you getting away is more important than having food in your own stomach and a full stomach could slow you down? That's, like, twenty percent medical knowledge eighty percent vague speculation, though, so don't put too much faith in it.: Pause. :He's pretty great, isn't he. The first time we met the disposal of the various bits of horrible creatures I hadn't eaten yet was under discussion and I explained that I wasn't going to let anything go to waste because I hate it when things die for no reason and he was like "yeah that's pretty bad" and he's just--so good.:

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:That sounds like Van: Tylendel smiles softly, but then it fades. :It upsets me so much, when I remember that he spent most of his life in a place where nobody saw how good he was, because - he wasn't the kind of good they wanted. Except his sister. I haven't met her but from what he said, she's really great: 

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:I don't know anything about his family except that his father is awful but it upsets me too. I--my childhood was pretty not great by most people's standards but at least I could trust my family to be good to me and--thinking about him not getting that makes me angry. I don't anger easily and I don't like it.:

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:It makes me angry too: Tylendel takes a few deliberate breaths. :I...probably shouldn't get angry right now: 

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:Yyyyyeah probably not. Um. Tell me what he's said about his sister?:

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:Um. She's - a bit like Savil, it sounds like. Strong-willed, knew exactly what she wanted. She left to go train to be in the Guard a few months before Van got sent to Haven. She sounds - pretty intimidating, honestly, but it's obvious she loves Van to pieces. She looked out for him when they were growing up, tried to keep their other siblings and cousins from picking on him so much: 

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:Aww, that's good! Savil's great, it's a pity the awesome skipped right over her brother. --Wait no that's the angry subject again whoops so uh hey how's Gala doing.:

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:She's really happy to see everyone again? Although, um, she says a lot of the other Companions are kind of weird about it still. They all know, even though most of the Heralds don't – Companions almost never keep secrets from each other, I guess. But Yfandes isn't being weird about it at all, and they were really good friends even before. So they're spending a lot of time together: 

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:I guess I'd be kind of weird about it too if I had to keep a secret that big from someone as close to me as Companions and Heralds are supposed to be.:

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:...That's a really good point. It's more common for Companions to have secrets from Heralds than the other way round, I think – I mean, I'm pretty sure they gossip with each other all the time, but Gala wouldn't tell me gossip about, oh, Herald Jaysen's private life. But I guess this is different, it's - kind of a huge deal. And it'd be easier for Yfandes because she doesn't have to keep it a secret from Van:

He pauses, his eyes going unfocused in the characteristic way that means he's talking to Gala. :Hmm, Gala says that Kellan is better about it too, but she's kind of intimidated by him, he's a lot older and more experienced. Gala was really young when she Chose me. A lot younger than Yfandes, actually, she says Yfandes was sort of her mentor, she just took a really long time to Choose: 

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:I am absolutely horrible about keeping secrets from people I love, I mean I wouldn't pass on gossip either but gossip doesn't...matter. Resurrection being possible matters.:

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:That makes sense: Tylendel lapses into silence. 

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Van wakes up a few minutes later. He does it in stages – sort of wriggling and stretching before he opens his eyes, realizing Tylendel is there and cuddling up closer to him, then blinking and looking around a bit dazedly. "...What time is it?" 

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:He is so adorable: Tylendel sends to Lucy. "Time for supper," he says out loud. It's already twilight outside. 

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:So adorable,: she agrees. "You needed your sleep, but you need food, too."

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"Supper," Vanyel agrees, but he doesn't move to get up. He yawns, rubs his eyes. "Ugh, my head is all gluey still." 

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"I am so tempted to just physically carry you two out of here but I'm not sure Donni would ever let you forget it, and I'm not going to subject you to that without your consent."

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Vanyel rolls his eyes and sits up. "I'm up, I'm up – all right, one of you has to move or I'm stuck here." 

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Lucy giggles and lets go and moves off to the side. 

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Vanyel gets up and wanders out into the living room with his arm looped around Tylendel's, still looking half-asleep. Savil and the others are already seated around the dining room table. 

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"Lancir signed off," Savil says immediately when she sees Lucy. "On the, er, graverobbing demonstration. Said it looked fine. So as soon as we get you a coffin, you're cleared to go." 

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"Awesome, how soon do you think that'll be?"

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"I already requisitioned it, so it'll depend if they have any ready to go, I guess. Could be tomorrow morning, could be a few days more." 

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Nod. 

:I hope you don't have too much trouble sleeping while I'm gone,: she tells Vanyel, privately so Donni won't overhear. 

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:I should be all right. Tylendel's here: 

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:Good. Not that I'm not happy to sing.: 

She watches Vanyel and his tiredness and excuses herself quickly once she's done eating. 

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Vanyel wakes up a bit over the course of the meal and eats a reasonable amount with only a little prodding, but he's not talking much and is spending a lot of it leaning on Tylendel's shoulder. 

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She reads while she waits for him and Tylendel to be done, sitting close to the door to their room. 

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Which is not too long after. :Lucy, are you all right?: Tylendel sends privately, reaching for her shoulder. :Not having a people day?:

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:Hm? I'm fine. Just feeling a little--I dunno. Odd, I guess.:

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:Have you been getting enough to eat?: He holds out a hand so she can pull herself up if she wants to. 

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She does. :I'll be good for a while longer, I ate an entire herd of wild pigs right before getting sent here and ending up having an entire pack of wyrsa and the basilisk. That amount of food lasts a while even for me.:

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:Wow! That's good, then: Tylendel drags Vanyel over to the bed. "...No, ashke, you can't sleep in your clothes." Vanyel grumbles something. "I know, I'm really tired too."

Shortly later they are both in bed and snuggled up together. 

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Lucy sings them to sleep. 

...Is sitting on the side of the bed normally this comfortable? It's really comfortable. Maybe it would be even more comfortable if she laid down, across the bed just past where the boys' feet are so she doesn't disturb them. Yep, that's sure cozy. She doesn't actually get into beds that often but blankets are super cozy maybe she should close her eyes for just a second zzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

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When Vanyel wakes up, all he's aware of at first is that something is missing. But not 'Lendel – he reaches out instinctively with his hands and his mind, confirms his lifebonded is there, and then comes fully awake and recognizes that there is not currently a voice singing. 

–He scrambles up, looking around wildly. "Lucy?" 

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Lucy is sprawled across the foot of the bed, still in her clothes, her chest rising and falling evenly, a small trickle of drool creeping out of her mouth and soaking into the blanket. 

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Oh. Embarrassed, Vanyel lies back down, curling up beside Tylendel, who's a much deeper sleeper and is just barely swimming his way toward awareness. :Shh, ashke, go back to sleep: 

...He forgot that Lucy needs to sleep sometimes. It's really cute, actually. He sends Yfandes, who's reaching out to check on him after the momentary alarm, a mental image through his eyes. She agrees on the adorableness. 

Vanyel drifts off again until the next time that either of the others moves. 

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Lucy doesn't sleep often but she's a heavy sleeper when she does. 

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Tylendel, with no recollection of his earlier waking, opens his eyes about half a candlemark later. That's funny, why is Van still asleep...? He's not alarmed or anything, but he does lift his head, and– oh, that's adorable. Gala gets a mental image relayed to her too. She gloats that Yfandes already showed her.

Tylendel lies still a bit longer, not wanting to disturb either Vanyel or Lucy, but he does really need to use the privy, so eventually he creeps out of bed as quietly as he can. 

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It is a little while after that that Lucy yawns, stretches, opens her eyes, sees the bright morning sunlight, and sits bolt upright as her cheeks turn colors at the realization that she accidentally procrastinated sleeping so hard she fell asleep in someone else's bed without meaning to. Ooooooops. And Tylendel isn't there which means there was at least one witness to this, oops. 

...At least Vanyel's still asleep? She starts singing quietly. 

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This is enough to fully wake Vanyel, who’s been lying there groggily. He yawns. “Lucy, you are very adorable when you sleep. Also you droo- Sorry that’s rude.” He turns pink.

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Slightly hysterical giggle. "I don't think it's ruder than falling asleep in someone else's bed without permission!"

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"You spend every night sitting in our bed," Vanyel points out. "Seems only fair that you get to sleep in it once in a while." He stretches and then gets up and pads over to the wardrobe. "...Wow, I'm actually kind of hungry for breakfast. I don't think I usually am? I guess maybe I'm just bad at noticing." 

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"It's still a little embarrassing that I put off sleep so long it happened by accident and I didn't even notice I was doing it. Normally when everyone else is asleep I'm alone and I'll get bored and join them more often than I strictly have to, but, uh, with you and then also 'Lendel to watch over, I, uh, failed to be alone and get bored. Not that I'm at all opposed to this but the fact that I didn't even notice that I hadn't slept in over a month is still kind of ridiculous. Speaking of bad at noticing."

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Vanyel chuckles. "I guess we'll have to start reminding you or something." He pokes around in his closet. "Ooh. You know what, I don't actually have to wear Herald clothes at all. I - used to like dressing nicely. Then I guess I sort of forgot. What do you think of this one?" He pulls out a midnight-blue tunic with velvet around the collar and embroidery on the shoulders. 

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"Oh, that's lovely," she says, clasping her hands appreciatively. "I thought I didn't care about that sort of thing at all when I was younger but then I started having a human body and it turns out that looking nice feels great."

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Vanyel gives her a considering look, like an artist studying a sculpture. "You'd look nice in a lot of things, I think. The hertasi in k'Treva would love dressing you up." 

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"...Ooh? Yfandes mentioned that the hertasi exist and live with the Tayledras but I don't know much about what they're like." 

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"They're neat! They live in the Vale but you almost never see them, they're really sneaky. I think they were created by a mage before the Cataclysm? And they were meant to be servants, which I guess they sort of are, but they definitely do it the way they think it should be done. They had this way of making food appear when I hadn't been eating enough that felt like they were chiding me about it, even though I never saw or spoke to them." 

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"Oh, that's cool, I look forward to--uh. I...may have forgotten to mention that Lancir suggested packing us all off to K'Treva again after Staven's back. Because there's only so many teenagers you can hide in a densely populated area before something gets out."

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Vanyel is so internally torn between being happy – k'Treva is wonderful, there are so many things he thought he'd never have the chance to show 'Lendel and now he can – and terrified at the prospect of Gating, that he ends up just standing there blinking at Lucy. 

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"Iiiiii should have mentioned this sooner, sorry."

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"No...it's fine..." Vanyel throws the tunic onto the bed and then sits down next to it, leaning forward and cupping both hands over his face. "Lucy, I'm - really scared to Gate." 

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She hugs him. 

"Which kind of scared? Like you're irrationally worried that if you do something bad will happen, or like you're rationally concerned about it being unpleasant of itself."

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Vanyel curls up against her. "Gates hurt. A lot. They drugged me for it last time, but. I guess that's pretty scary too. I - don't like the thought of being that helpless." 

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"That makes sense." She bites her lip thoughtfully. "I know a spell that can keep someone unconscious indefinitely but bring them right around afterwards without grogginess or side effects afterwards, Teacher liked to use it for general anesthetic because it was safer and more convenient than drugs, but I don't know if that helps if helplessness is part of it, you're even harder to bring 'round while it's in effect than while drugged asleep."

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Vanyel nods slowly. "I don't know that I should be as scared about that? We can go straight to the Vale this time – last time they'd moved and Savil didn't have a terminus in the new Vale, so she had to Gate to a cave in the Pelagirs, in winter, and wait for candlemarks and she might've gotten attacked at any point and had to defend both of us while I was a useless lump. But it won't be like that. And you're here."

He glances up at her. "Is there a minimum length of time for it? Or could you cast it right before the Gate and then reverse it as soon as it's down? I think I would mind a lot less if it was only going to be five minutes." 

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"There's de facto a minimum amount of time because the reversal involves actions that take time but that's on a scale of seconds, casting it on you right before the Gate goes up and reversing it when it goes down is trivial."

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Vanyel nods. 

"...Do you think I could try it once here, before we go? Just so I can see what it's like when I'm not about to go through a Gate? Maybe I'll decide that part by itself isn't scary at all." 

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"Oh, sure! --Maybe not until Tylendel gets back, though, I don't really want to have to explain it to him in the middle."

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Vanyel shakes his head. "It'll be less scary for me that way too. Um - should I be telling you to turn your back when I get changed?" He somehow hasn't thought about it at all until now. 

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She closes her eyes. "I don't think it matters, you're pretty thoroughly sorted into the platonic friend category in my head, but I am in general attracted to boys so it would be valid for you to want that."

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"Honestly I'm really used to k'Treva where everyone just takes their clothes off in front of whoever happens to be there whenever they feel like, that - was an adjustment - but it doesn't bother me at this point." Vanyel grabs a nice shirt to go with the tunic and changes into it. He quickly combs his hair. "All right, what do you think?" 

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"I think you look really good. And--healthier, honestly, it's like seeing a pretty bird with somewhat unsaturated feathers and then later with full bright plumage."

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Vanyel lights up at the praise. "White isn't really my color," he admits. "It suits 'Lendel much better." 

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Who wanders back in shortly later. "I got tea for both of you! It's a cold breakfast, Savil already left to go pick up a coffin– Ashke! You look amazing in that!" 

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Giggle. "He does, doesn't he? Oh, and there's something I forgot to tell you earlier, it came up with Van and we should talk about it. It's not bad! But you should know."

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"Oh?" Tylendel goes carefully still. He reaches out to take Vanyel's hand. "Go ahead." 

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"Lancir mentioned maybe sending us all to K'Treva until this is ready to go public once Staven is back because we're reaching critical mass of teenagers and you can only hide that for so long, but going involves a Gate, and Van is allergic to those now, so we were talking about using a spell I know that's more easily reversible and has fewer side effects than drugs to knock him out, but he wants me to try it on him now so he knows what it's like."

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"Oh." Tylendel stiffens. "Are you sure it's safe?" 

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"Yeah, completely. I've seen Teacher do it a million times for general anesthesia, it's never had any negative effects."

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Tylendel still seems tense about it, but nods. "All right - if something does go wrong I guess Gala or Yfandes can get a Healer here really fast. Van, ashke, are you sure?" He waits for Vanyel's determined nod. "All right, if it's going to knock you out then probably you should lie down first." 

He leads Vanyel over to the bed, and Vanyel stretches out cautiously with his head in Tylendel's lap. He does look pretty nervous, but he tells Lucy to go ahead. 

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Lucy nods, and draws a symbol on Vanyel's forehead with one finger, and murmurs "Tlab, Yig, Iaaaa," 

And consciousness drops away from Vanyel like a discarded cloak. 

She waits a moment, then draws a counterclockwise circle in his forehead and says, "Aba, Abaa, Yig, fnog," to reverse it. 

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Vanyel looks around. "...Did you do it already?" 

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"Yep! That was it."

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Tylendel shivers. "That was kind of scary. I couldn't feel you at all, ashke. But if it didn't hurt and you feel fine now, then it definitely seems better than giving you drugs." He squeezes Vanyel's hand. "I just - don't want anything bad to happen to you. Ever.

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"Nothing permanent is going to happen to either of you ever again."

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Tylendel nods, but still needs to hug Vanyel for a minute or so before he seems to believe it.

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"That wasn't bad," Vanyel says, extracting himself. "I hate taking drugs, it feels so weird when it's kicking in and then I'm foggy for ages even after I wake up. This is way better." 

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She shudders. "Being foggy is the worst," she agrees wholeheartedly. 

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"...Well, what about breakfast? I'm hungry." 

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Lucy picks up one of the cups of tea Tylendel brought in and drains it faster than its temperature would render wise for a normal human. 

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Vanyel carries his out into the living room. "Mardic?" Lucy will be able to hear him call out. "Any idea when Savil's getting back?" 

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Lucy pads out after him, absently rubbing residual drool off her cheek. 

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"Half a candlemark," Mardic says cheerfully. "And she's got it! The coffin, I mean."

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"I've never seen a real coffin," Donni says almost dreamily. "I wonder if she'll let me lie down it in just to see what it's like." 

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"...'Kay, so, I've led an extremely unusual life, but that's Donni being Donni, that's not a normal thing to say, right, I don't have the usual instincts for this kind of thing and like to practice remembering which things that sound reasonable to me sound reasonable to the kind of person who's going to look at me with horror if I talk about hiding people by putting them in my mouth or comparing magic to mosquitos." 

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Mardic chuckles and hugs his lifebonded. "No, that's just Donni being herself, but we're all used to her." 

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"Oh, I know I don't need to self-censor in here."

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"I would say you could sleep in the coffin on your trip but you don't need to sleep and you'll probably do it all in a day anyway," Donni quips.  

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"...I need to sleep ever," she says, her cheeks heating up, "just not often, I'm good for about a month."

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Suspicious look. "What's got you so embarrassed about it?" 

(Tylendel and Vanyel both put on blank expressions and do not say anything.) 

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"...Lost track of when I had last slept and accidentally fell asleep last night. Apparently I drool."

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Donni giggles. 

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"She drools sometimes too," Mardic says, elbowing her. 

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Vanyel is at the sideboard, stacking up his plate with toast and fruit. "I have no idea why I'm so hungry," he complains. "It's distracting." 

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Eeeeee Vanyel is eating better of his own accord and he has healthier plumage eeeeeee. 

"Probably it's your body playing catch-up and you'd be even hungrier if we hadn't been prodding you to eat even when you weren't."

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"I hope so - you're too thin, ashke. That tunic is lovely but it'll look even better once you fill out again." A sly smile. "Or, well, on the floor–"

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"Ew, hey, you have a bedroom," Donni says, rolling her eyes. 

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"Look, you and Mardic spent the last three years being gross at each other in front of me, it's only fair Van and I get our chance too."  

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Vanyel goes very still. 

"...Not the last three years," he says faintly after a moment. "Been another year in the middle, 'Lendel." 

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"Oh. Right."

Awkward silence. 

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Lucy DESPERATELY wants to do something to break the awkward silence but cannot think of anything REMOTELY appropriate. Since she is not Donni, she stuffs a forkful of breakfast in her mouth instead and thinks furiously while chewing. Nothing comes to mind but at least the food is tasty enough to be SLIGHTLY distracting. 

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Mardic starts a slightly strained conversation with Tylendel about their mage-studies. 

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And then Savil gets back, thankfully. "Lucy, we have it!" 

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"Oh, awesome!" 

She eats the rest of her breakfast hurriedly--this is not a woman who will willingly waste food--and then goes over to hug each of Vanyel and Tylendel in turn. 

"I'll be back before you know it," she promises. 

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Vanyel in particular hugs her back tightly, not letting go for a bit. :I know you'll be back soon but I'm going to miss you anyway: 

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:I'll miss you too. I don't really want to leave. But this is important, and sometimes doing unpleasant things is necessary.: Thoughtful pause. :You'll be--able to think about things this time--when I get back, do you want to watch me do the alchemy? I can explain what I'm doing, and more people who can do it is better.:

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:Sure! That sounds really interesting actually: 

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:Cool.: 

She pecks him on the cheek and, once he releases her, dashes out to go find the coffin. 

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And Vanyel will go out riding with Tylendel and their Companions, and play games with Mardic and Donni, and generally try to keep himself busy and distracted enough that he doesn't have room to miss Lucy, or feel irrationally scared that something is going to happen to them while she isn't there. 

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Lucy keeps the decoy coffin wrapped up and invisible as she rushes towards her destination. 

Avoiding making enough noise to be perceived clearly no matter how invisible she is takes care, and slows her down enough to make her clench her teeth and pointedly avoid calculating how much more ground she would be covering if she didn't have to be discreet. 

Despite what Donni said, it takes more than a day. It took their group of six about a week to get to Haven the first time. Lucy in natural form is faster than a Companion, and they weren't exactly bolting at breakneck pace the whole way, but Lucy is still significantly less than halfway there when the sun drops behind the horizon and the traffic on the road thins to nothingness and she can abandon near-silence in favor of just avoiding sounding like a gatling gun made of cannons. She makes much better time this way. 

By the time the sun rises again, she hasn't made it there, but she has made it off the main road. She compares her current progress with their schedule on the way to Haven, and slows enough to be quiet again; it's much less likely that she'll be heard without all the constant traffic of the main road, but even with her enhanced hearing there's no guarantee she'd realize there was a witness before they heard her, and she can't make the swap until nightfall anyway. 

The acrid smell hits her, and she wrinkles her nose. She doesn't have trauma about it, and she can tolerate smells that would make a hobo puke, but now that she's met Tylendel and doesn't have Vanyel to worry about...

This is a sad place. 

Well. She's going to fix it. She's made a good start, and she is at this very moment working to fix something adjacent, and she's going to fix all of it in time. 

She makes her way to the keep, and the graveyard, by a circuitous route that keeps her out of the way of people. She's totally justified in what she's doing here but it's still a little awkward. 

She lurks there among the dead until the sun goes down, until the sounds of human activity she can detect are few and far away. 

She pries into the earth, carefully, oh, so, carefully. She probes beneath the soil until she finds the telltale wooden shape six feet down. She wraps her tentacles around it, engulfing it completely so that even if the coffin disintegrated no part of the body would escape her grasp, and slowly tugs it out of the earth. When it reaches the surface and the ground is pried open as far as the coffin will push it, she holds it open as she finishes extracting the real casket, and pushes the empty decoy into the place beneath the earth where it lay.

Once the transfer is complete, she examines the site as best she can in the darkness, poking the slight discrepancies back into place. 

She waits there until dawn, uses the improved lighting to check to make sure she didn't miss anything, and then takes off again as swiftly as she quietly can. 

It is shortly after noon of the next day when she reaches the palace again. 

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In which case she'll find Savil and the others all in the suite, eating lunch together. Vanyel has been sleeping okay, with a somewhat higher rate of panicked half-awakenings in the middle of the night, but none of the really bad nightmares. He's back to not being very hungry, today, but Tylendel is occupied trying to shove food into him anyway. 

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Lucy stashes the casket in the alchemy lab, washes off traces of soil at the pump, and comes around to greet everyone. 

"Hey! I'm back. It went off without a hitch."

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Vanyel and Tylendel both leap up to greet her. Vanyel gets there first, and throws his arms around her. :I'm really glad you're back: 

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She hugs him back. :I missed you. It's good to be back.: Muscles she hadn't realized were tense relax as she luxuriates in the human contact, the feeling of family home safe good that embracing her friend brings. 

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Tylendel hugs her as well. "Thank you so much for doing this. I don't know how to repay it." 

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"It's not about repayment. You're my friend, and I want to help you."

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"...I know. But I still feel like I owe you - everything - and I haven't done anything for you, really." He looks into her eyes, smiles crookedly. "Friends helping each other goes both ways." 

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"That is super fair. I mean, I really really appreciate the hugs, but I can see how it's not quite on the same level. I'll let you know if anything comes up."

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Tylendel nods, then lets go of her and drags Vanyel back to the table. "Finish your food, ashke. Lucy, he hasn't been eating enough today."

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"Don't tattle on me," Vanyel mutters. 

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She giggles. 

"Do you know where the alchemy lab is so I can meet you there or do I need to show you?"

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"I know where it is," Savil says. "I can show them – well, whoever wants to come. Does it seem all right to you for 'Lendel to watch...this?" 

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"...I think if he wants to he shouldn't be stopped but it would be super understandable to not want to. Uh, I wasn't planning on opening the coffin before incinerating it but I am extra not planning on it if he comes."

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"Please don't? Why would you do that?" 

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"I wouldn't! Just. If you show up I would consider adding a few extra nails just to be sure."

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Tylendel shivers. "...I think I won't." 

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"That is so, so valid." She hugs him. 

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Vanyel gives Tylendel a worried look. "Lucy, how much of it are you going to want me around for, if I do want to see how it works?" He doesn't really want to be spending all day apart from Tylendel the whole time. That feels...wrong. 

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"Um, a lot of it is repetition, so not that much probably. I'll write out the whole procedure in Valdemaran at some point and we can go over it later if you want, and you weren't going to see the whole thing anyway since I can work through the night. Let's say the first twenty minutes at the beginning and then I'll come get you before I start the next stage?"

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"Oh, sure, that's fine. I should finish my food – I can catch up?" Vanyel goes back to sit down. 

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She gives him a thumbs-up and heads for the alchemy lab. 

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Vanyel gets through enough of the food on his plate to satisfy Tylendel, and hugs his lifebonded, and then heads off with Savil to join Lucy. Donni troops along with them; Mardic declines to come and stays to keep Tylendel company. 

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Lucy takes out a small bottle of accelerant and pours it out in a sort of celtic-knot pattern on the top of the coffin, grabs flint and steel from the table, and lights it. 

At first the fire burns in the pattern the liquid made, but after a few seconds the entire coffin erupts in an intense blaze that makes a very audible roaring noise as it grows almost to the ceiling, but sheds no heat perceptible to any of the onlookers. 

After about a quarter of a minute, the fire dies away, leaving a pile of ash and some bits of metal slag that presumably represent the nails. She picks up a brush and a tray and starts carefully collecting the powder. 

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"Why's the fire like that?" Donni says curiously. 

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"The fire is like that because it's magic, and it's better for the fire to be magic because normally fire reduces the soft tissues to gas and leaves the bones relatively intact, which is much, much less efficient for our purposes. You can use normal powderized-bone cremation 'ash,' even if you're not me and can't cheat, but it gives you less of a safe margin for other steps, so this way is better. And since it's magic anyway it's easier to build in the effect so that it doesn't scorch the floor or spread or anything." She finishes collecting the ash, and carefully funnels it into a piece of glassware. 

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Vanyel can watch with genuine curiosity as long as he doesn't think about powdered Tylendel being funneled into glassware. 

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She pours in purified water and sets it to heat. "This is going to need normal amounts of purification--better than normal, really, 'normal' accounts for the possibility that the body has been buried without a coffin and you have to dig up a lot of dirt with the skeleton. I'm going to have to filter out the ash from the coffin and whatever clothes he was buried in and that's pretty much it. It's generally considered preferable to have to do a little extra filtering than to not have whatever decomposed ex-biomass would stick to anything you removed, and also a lot of people consider it more respectful to just burn the casket than to open it, let alone stripping a corpse naked." 

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"Ew, yup, that is an image that actually disturbs me a bit." 

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"Sorry. I'm not good at calibrating what's going to upset people. I don't really consider anything that doesn't involve suffering to be inherently disturbing."

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"...Honestly that's sort of impressive. But, yes, that would creep out most people."

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"...I could have predicted that, I think, but I have a harder time sorting out...what things a 'normal' person would object to because they're objectionable versus because of the way normal people are about things like magic and liking your own gender. I mean nobody gets hurt if people have arbitrary objections to, I dunno, the color purple, that'd be pretty stupid to object to, so it's obviously different in that way, but the purple thing is also different from the dead bodies thing."

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"Right, huh, that makes sense. There are things that almost all people don't like, like – oh, I don't know, the smell of rotten food, or stepping in piss, most people would say that's objectionable even if it doesn't hurt you. Oh, and then some people can't handle talking things like gory murder cases they're eating, but that doesn't bother me– Ooh, Van, did I tell you about the murder we helped investigate?" 

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"Don't want to know," Vanyel says automatically. 

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"When it comes to smells, or tastes or sounds, my perception is actually almost the same as normal, except that I mind things less. Like, I could tell that the basilisk smelled and tasted bad, but it wasn't so bad that I couldn't eat it." She dips her finger in water, draws a sigil on the table, and takes the glassware off the fire and sets it down on the sigil. 

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"What does the sigil do?" Vanyel asks her. 

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"It prepares the stuff that didn't used to be part of a person to bind to this," she picks up a vial of one of the chemicals, "so that when I pour the whole mixture through a filter the dross is left behind." She pours some in, causing the glassware to turn a dark violet and emit a soft puff of small lavender smoke-ring. 

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"Huh, neat!" Donni gets a speculative look. "I wonder what color I'd turn." 

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Lucy considers making a deadpan joke to the effect of if she's going to kill herself to find out please let her know first so she can knock Mardic out, decides that this would probably constitute stomping all over Vanyel's triggers, and instead elects to say, "Well, if nothing else gets you first you'll die of old age, you can find out in, what, sixty years or so."

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"I'm a Herald. Probably a monster will get me first. But maybe I'll be lucky." Donni keeps watching. 

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Vanyel shivers. It's not that he minds going into danger so much – he used to be a coward but things changed. Thinking about Tylendel in combat makes his insides go cold. 

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Well, Lucy is very very attached to the two of them, so maybe any combat situations Tylendel could be involved in will happen to have a giant invisible tentacle beast happen to them instead. But that's a consideration for the future; for now, she pours the mixture into another piece of glassware, sets that one to heat, and starts explaining different chemicals. Most of them combine with sigils to coagulate dross, but these ones actually temporarily bind to the ex-biomass and make sure they don't settle out of the solution, and this one serves as an indicator to let her know when the mixture is pure enough to finish the purification step. 

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Vanyel nods along, interested. Donni is also interested but her attention span is shorter and every so often she's instead derailed into cracking some joke. 

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And then Lucy says, "Van, the rest of the purification is pretty much just more of the same, modulo different sigils and chemicals, I can show you those later." 

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Then Vanyel will thank her for the explanations and eagerly head back to the suite to hug Tylendel. 

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That's so valid. 

She continues explaining the steps of the purification process in detail to Savil and Donni for the next slightly more than an hour, until the indicator chemical suggests that the mixture is pure enough to start turning from ashes into proper resurrection salts, and she puts it back on the fire and goes off to find the boys. 

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They are sprawled out on the sofa, cuddling. "...Oh. Heya, Lucy," Tylendel says absently. Mardic seems to have taken himself elsewhere. 

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She considers the situation, and then sprawls across their laps. 

"I spent several days not hugging anyone," she complains. 

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"That's pretty unreasonable," Tylendel agrees. "Hugs are important. Er, everything going all right with the - thing?" 

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"Everything's fine," Lucy says. "That's technically why I came out here is because I finished the one bit and thought Vanyel might want to see the start of the first. But hugs first." She hugs Tylendel's knee. 

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Hugs! 

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Vanyel is ready to go whenever Lucy decides it's a good time. 

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Lucy wants another couple minutes of hug but then she is ready to go back. 

She shows him what chemicals she's using and explains what they do; her hand hesitates over a flask of dusty yellow-green fluid that wasn't there before before skipping over it for the moment. 

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Huh. Vanyel notices it but doesn't say anything. 

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After about half an hour she is nowhere near done, but she's done a fairly representative sample of things, mostly. She hesitates again, then picks up the flask and pours some of the fluid into the bubbling container of once-and-future-Staven, and says, "and this part is optional and I mostly wouldn't bother explaining it but, uh, this is my ichor and adding it is part of how I cheat, like, just being Yog-Sothoth's daughter while doing the sigils and incantation helps but this helps too, I have no reason to think Staven needs it but better safe than sorry."

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"Huh. Right. Um, that's what you have instead of blood? Does Wilbur have it too?" 

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"His is a little greener. It's interesting, when I'm in this form my blood looks red, but if I bleed it out into something like this it starts changing after a little while until it looks like this." 

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"That is interesting! I wonder why. I guess you're using your magic to look human, including at least some of your insides? But then the magic might stop working once it's not part of your body anymore." 

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"Yeah...it's interesting, I think, figuring out where this body is real and where it isn't. It was supposed to be--just a human body, a pretty face that could finally be mine after a lifetime of having none--but it's obviously inhuman in some of its details. I don't sweat, for one thing. I don't need any more sleep than I did before, and I need to eat as much. But eating works through this mouth, I don't have to turn back into my other form to do it. I usually do for, uh, stuff like the basilisk, just because eating that kind of thing would take so long at this size, but I don't have to. It's sort of frustrating how ostentatiously unique I am, honestly, it makes figuring out my biology so much harder." 

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"...Wait, so you could eventually eat a whole basilisk in this shape?" Vanyel says incredulously. "Where would it go?" 

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"That's another thing I don't know! I don't have to use the privy, either, in either shape, no matter how much I eat or drink. It's baffling, and there's so much anatomical knowledge I'm not masochistic enough to consent to vivisection for even if I've occasionally been curious enough to be tempted." 

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High pitched giggle. 

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Vanyel rounds on her. "Donni, do not make a horrible joke." 

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"You know, I'm still really bad at figuring out what's disturbing, but I think I might slowly be learning what not to say when Donni in particular is in the room to riff on it."

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Donni sticks her tongue out at Lucy. 

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She sticks out her tongue at Donni in return and goes through a couple more representative samples and shoos Vanyel to go hug Tylendel some more. 

She continues explaining things as she works, occasionally taking breaks to hang out with the boys when things are just heating or cooling and she can't directly do anything. 

Night falls. Lucy times things right to be able to sing while Vanyel and Tylendel fall asleep. 

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It's really nice to have her back, and to resume his usual routine of falling asleep in Tylendel's arms while Lucy sings. 

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:Lucy?: Tylendel sends after a bit. 

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:Yeah?:

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He squirms a bit before answering. :I'm worried you won't like Staven: 

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:Huh! That's not something I was expecting. I usually like people. As long as they don't have normal-people problems. He's fine with magic and you liking boys, right?:

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:Er, yes on both of those. It's just, he's not – I don't know – I never really thought about it until recently but I'm not sure he's that nice? He has a temper and he goads people and he's always got to be right or have the last word...: 

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:Huh. I guess that's fair. ...I'd love to be able to reassure you that of course I'll love him, but honestly, I can't know until it happens. But. Gonna be honest here, my standards for just liking people are not high. Even if I don't take a shine to him, even if I value him primarily for your sake, I will probably get along with him okay. I'm hard to goad and I don't care about not getting the last word.:

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Tylendel seems relieved. :That makes sense. ...Honestly he might be less that way with you. He always had something to prove, with everyone else, he was too young and he had to show how tough he was to be taken seriously...: Thoughtful pause. :I don't think it was good for him, inheriting the landholding. He didn't complain or anything, just - it was a lot, I guess: 

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:It would be. That's a huge amount of responsibility even under normal circumstances, which I'm led to believe these weren't. Is he going to be offended if I kinda want to hug him over that? Because I can totally assure him that I pretty much just want to hug everyone at all times if so.:

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Tylendel giggles, quickly stifling it. :If he's offended I'll punch him. I'm allowed to do that, I'm his brother – his little brother, as he always had to make sure I remembered: 

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:Naturally. Twin privileges are a sacred institution.:

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:You get it: Tylendel shifts his position, wraps Vanyel more firmly in his arms. :...I feel better about it now. Goodnight, Lucy: 

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:Goodnight.: 

Once Tylendel is asleep too, she gives them both one last fond look and heads back to the lab and does alchemy all night. 

Staven's remains are so much less comprehensively befuckened than Tylendel's were. She has them all. She adds any ichor, of course, no sense in not taking every precaution possible, but she doesn't have to add it over and over to ensure that the resulting mass of powder corresponds appropriately to the mass of an adult human. She doesn't have to perform repeated paranoid diagnostics to make sure she isn't going to accidentally give her patient an embarrassing case of vampirism or worse. She doesn't have to distill the chemicals she needs from plants. And it certainly doesn't hurt that she's more familiar with this lab now, either. 

She finishes shortly before dawn, the resulting powder a rich tyrian hue. 

She stoppers the beaker, exhales softly, and picks it up and heads back to the quarters to wait. 

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Mardic is the first one up, right at the crack of dawn; he's the only real morning person. "Oh!" he says, keeping his voice low. "Lucy, did you...?" 

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She grins and holds up the beaker. 

"I'm waiting until Tylendel is awake, he super needs to be there when it happens." 

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"Right, of course." Mardic starts making tea, occasionally glancing at her out of the corner of his eye and grinning. 

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She grins back and hums and bounces slightly. 

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Vanyel sleeps in, actually; by the time he drifts awake, he can already feel Tylendel on the way to doing the same. 

:Lucy?: he reaches out; he can't hear her singing, she must've gone back to the alchemy lab. 

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:Hey! I finished overnight! I'm ready for the incantation whenever 'Lendel is.:

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Vanyel's burst of surprised delight wakes Tylendel the rest of the way. :Morning, peacock - what is it?: 

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"You've got to get up right now," Vanyel says, tugging at him. "Lucy's done. She's all ready."

About thirty seconds later, both of them are out of bed and pattering down the hall barefoot. 

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Lucy meets them and grins and unstoppers the beaker and incants,

"Y'AI 'NG'NGAH,
YOG-SOTHOTH
H'EE—L'GEB
F'AI THRODOG
UAAAH!"

And the powder swirls and forms and solidifies into Staven. 

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"SAVIL!" Mardic yells down the hall as soon as he's not literally interrupting the incantation.

 

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Staven scrambles up from the floor, frantically reaching for a weapon which isn't there because he is completely naked. "What – oh gods – where... 'Lendel?! What are you doing here it's not safe you've got to–"

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Tylendel is staring at him with a frozen, deer-in-headlights look. 

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Whoops in retrospect she probably should have mentioned this to Savil first oh well. 

"Hi! You were dead. I fixed it. I can do that." She does not mention that Tylendel also spent a while dead this seems like not the exact right moment. 

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He stares at Lucy, then wildly around the room. "What? That doesn't– where am I? Where are my men, are they – we were being attacked..." He trails off. Deflates a bit. "I remember seeing Kafan and Etrand... They didn't make it out. Did they." He sounds almost accusing. 

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Savil comes pelting down the hall in her nightgown. "Mardic what– oh." She's relieved that at least nothing was on fire, that was a very 'something is on fire' shout especially coming from Mardic

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Sorry, she mouths to Savil. 

"I don't know what happened exactly and I didn't--get a lot of details about people other than you--I don't know who else died. But I can get them back too, later, once this is public."

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Tylendel finally unfreezes himself, stumbles forward, hugs his brother. "I'm sorry, Stav, I don't think any of the armsmen with you got out alive. But Lucy's telling the truth, she can fix it. And the holding is–" definitely not fine but that's his own stupid fault and not Staven's, "um, Vanissa inherited and she's managing it well." 

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"What? They gave it to a girl? Whose idea was that?" Then he darts a wide-eyed apologetic look in Lucy's direction, as it belatedly occurs to them that maybe yelling this in front of a girl who just brought him back from the dead is rude or something. 

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Lucy covers her mouth and giggles. 

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"I think it might've been Van's originally, actually? He was impressed with her. Oh – Staven, meet Van. My, um, lifebonded." 

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"I've heard a lot about you," Vanyel says, a bit stiffly. 

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"I have heard less about you, but I care about Vanyel and Tylendel a lot, and I am also a twin, so it was obvious that I had to get you back sooner rather than later."

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Staven looks from one to the other of them, clearly overwhelmed by the sudden shift from 'about to be murdered by wyrsa' to 'naked in someone's living room with his twin and his twin's boyfriend and a strange white-haired girl claiming to have brought him back from the dead'. 

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"Mardic," Savil says, "can you get this boy some clothes?" 

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Mardic nods and runs off to his room. 

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"This must be really weird and I apologize for not waiting five minutes and preparing things slightly better."

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"Um, apparently you brought me back from the dead, that's– I mean, it's really weird but I don't feel like you should apologize for it?" Staven rubs his eyes. "Why am I naked? Wasn't I wearing clothes when I died?" 

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"I assume so but that's just how the method of resurrection works, it reconstitutes your body but not anything else. It reconstructs you, it doesn't just--grab you out of time from the moment you died minus some lethal injuries."

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"Reconstitutes?" Staven looks down at himself with mild alarm. "What happened to my actual body?" 

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"Iiiiii incinerated it and then did alchemy to the ashes? And then did magic to the alchemized ashes? And now it is whole and uninjured and you are in it. But, uh, you were dead for a while, I don't...think you would have wanted the clothes you were buried in. At this point."

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"How. Um." Staven swallows. Clears his throat. "How long ago?" 

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"About...a year...ish...probably less??? 'Lendel, how long had he--when you, um--visited? And talked to Vanissa?"

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"Not, er, not very long. Couple weeks, maybe. ...I don't actually remember exactly, I - wasn't doing great." 

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"So, like, nine months ish, I think. Um." :Tylendel I have NO IDEA how to tell him you aren't almost a year older than him now.:

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:I should tell him: Tylendel licks his lips. "Stav, I, er, I – sort of, um, died. Too."

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"WHAT?" 

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That's so valid. 

"Vanyel was kidnapped and Tylendel and Gala went to rescue him and the wyrsa got Gala and Tylendel got Vanyel out and then called a Final Strike. And then eight months later I showed up and met Vanyel and found out and brought Tylendel back as fast as I could and then I found out he was a twin which meant I had to get you as soon as possible too. But, uh. Final Strike. Evan Leshara and his pet mage are super, super dead, and I'm not bringing them back any time soon."

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Staven turns pale.

"...You're joking," he says finally, in a very small voice. "That - can't be what happened." 

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"I am not joking."

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"I'm sorry," Tylendel says, eyes fixed on the floor. 

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"No - it's not..." Staven looks around helplessly, and then sits down and puts his head in his hands. 

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"I have...clothes...?" Mardic emerges from his room, stops, trails off. :Lucy, are they all right?: 

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:Uh Staven just found out that Tylendel also died and is having some feelings about that.: She...is not going to hug him right this minute, she is an alarmingly powerful stranger, it's a bad idea. But. Gosh, she wants to hug him. 

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:Oh. Right: Mardic runs back to his room and comes back with a blanket, and he crouches down next to Staven, not moving too fast, and puts it around his shoulders. "Hey," he says quietly. "I know it's a shock. But 'Lendel is fine now. Lucy can get your people back too. It's going to be all right. I promise." He twists to look over his shoulder, jerks his chin at Tylendel in a 'come here' motion. 

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Tylendel stumbles over and sits next to his twin. "I'm really sorry," he says woodenly. 

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"Can you stop saying that. It's not - you - I'm sorry I was a goddamned idiot and got myself killed." 

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:Do you think he's likely to find the fact that I can eat wyrsa reassuring or just more surreal at this point,: Lucy asks Tylendel. 

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:Um. Maybe don't mention it yet. Probably too much weird: Tylendel hugs Staven. "It's all right. I'm here. We're both here. We're going to figure things out." 

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Good, good. 

:You okay?: She asks Van. 

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:I'm fine: It's kind of weird watching Tylendel with his brother, who Vanyel never met before, and he does feel a bit neglected, but he's had 'Lendel to himself for days. And his lifebonded spent weeks grieving his twin before his Final Strike.

...He could sort of use a hug from Lucy, though. He drifts toward her. 

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Oh hugs yes please. 

:Tylendel was scared I wouldn't like Staven, last night, and I told him even if I didn't specifically like him I would probably get along with him, and I sort of didn't have time to think about it while I was doing alchemy but now I'm sort of worried he won't like me.:

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:Um, why?: It's hard to imagine anyone not liking Lucy. 

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:I'm really powerful and weird and tactless and he did just come out of being tortured to death.:

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:Lucy, I think he'll like you fine. He just maybe needs a bit of space right now: Actually, now that he thinks of it, waking up from just being murdered and being suddenly surrounded by strangers sounds awful. He pulls Tylendel in as well. :Ashke, maybe you should take him to our room?: 

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:But what if--: She stops and takes a deep breath. :Sorry. I--I can fight off any kind of horrible monster but awkward social situations scare me.:

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:Honestly, that's - really understandable. I think I used to be more just scared of everything, but in the last few months I guess I got used to running headfirst at monsters. Not so much to people who might be upset with me: 

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:Yeah, that sounds about right. With monsters you know where you stand and nobody'll ever say you weren't justified in whatever you do to them.:

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:That's it exactly: Vanyel agrees. 

Tylendel hands his brother the robe Mardic grabbed, waits for him to put it on, and then takes him down the hall to Vanyel and Tylendel's bedroom and shuts the door. 

Vanyel heads for the sofa and flops onto it. 

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She flops with him and hugs him some more. 

:At least that was somewhat less dramatic than when Tylendel came back. Even if I should have like waited five minutes and told Savil it was about to happen and stuff.:

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:I think you did fine. I mean, it was a bit awkward, but probably coming back from the dead is going to be awkward no matter what: 

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Savil drifts over to the other sofa, Mardic and Donni decide to go out for a ride, and the morning passes. Tylendel emerges from his room around lunchtime, his brother trailing just behind. He looks tired but also more cheerful than before. 

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By this time Wilbur has emerged from the room that is his and ostensibly also Lucy's, and is curled up by himself reading. Despite his sitting position, his size is entirely apparent. 

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"Hey, Staven! This is my twin," Lucy giggles, gesturing at Wilbur. 

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"Wow, you look even more different than 'Lendel and I." He smiles a bit nervously at Wilbur. "You'r really tall! Um, can you do magic too?"  

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"...Yes. I like taking it apart and figuring out how it works. Lucy likes actually doing it. We both do some of both, but we also specialize." 

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"Anyone can do our kind of magic where we're from, you don't have to be specially magic yourself to do it, but being specially magic helps, and Wilbur and I are." 

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"Her moreso than I. Which is convenient, because if you think I'm tall, you should have seen her before she learned to shapeshift." 

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"Seen me? Don't be disingenuous, you know I'm invisible in natural form." 

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Wilbur throws a pencil at her. "You come up with a better word, then." 

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Staven giggles. "Oh. I, um - interesting. I didn't know this wasn't what you really look like. I guess if you're invisible you don't 'look' like anything." 

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"I mean, this is what I really look like, it just isn't what I look like all the time. But, uh, this body is still me, it's not a mask I don't identify with or anything. I'm half-human, I designed this face to look like my mom, I have white hair because she was an albino and not for weird magic reasons, I am a human girl, I just, also am other stuff." Deep breath. "Sorry, I'm not offended or anything, you didn't say anything wrong, I just--have a lot of feelings about what I am and how there's nothing else quite like me, like, my other form actually is shaped less like Wilbur than this one is."

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"Oh. Um, sorry, I didn't mean..." Staven's cheeks are flushed with embarrassment now. "You did a good job, it's a really great body–" He goes even redder. 

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She dissolves into giggles. "It's okay," she manages, "I have no tact either. And most people would be pretty if they got to decide what they looked like, but that doesn't mean I don't enjoy being pretty, or having people notice it." 

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Staven giggles too, somewhat nervously.

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"All right!" Savil says brightly. "Listen, everyone. I've spoken to everyone and the plan for after this is to head to k'Treva - Van, sorry, I don't think I'd a chance to talk to you about it..." 

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"Lucy told me," Vanyel says quietly. 

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"I have a spell that's better than drugs. Teacher uses it for surgery. Van asked me to show him what it was like and I did."

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"Really! That's excellent. The drugs don't even work perfectly at any safe dose." 

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"Oh dear. I was more concerned about the part where drugs have lead-up and drop off that's unpleasant to deal with. When's the plan to leave, like, now, in an hour, tomorrow morning?"

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"Tomorrow morning. I have to Gate, I'd rather be well-rested for it. And that gives us time to pack properly." 

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Nod. 

"--I have a lot of hands and not much stuff, if anyone wants help packing." 

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"Most of our things aren't that unpacked," Mardic admits. "Since we just moved over here. And I bet nearly all of Van and 'Lendel's possessions are still in boxes. But I'll take some help, sure." 

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"Cool. Show me what's where." She reluctantly gets up from hugging Vanyel. 

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It's mostly Donni who needs help packing, actually. Unlike Mardic, who has neatly arranged the clothes he wants accessible in a wardrobe and is now returning them to a travel-bag, every single box of her possessions has been opened and random things are strewn everywhere around her half of the room. 

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"So obviously this is because you're just like this, but did this happen because you did it on purpose because of who you are as a person, or did it just sort of happen because of who you are as a person?"

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Donni gives her a blank look. "Is there a difference between those two things? I never thought about it."

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"--I mean, I guess the difference is how much you think about it? Which maybe sorta answers my question." Pack pack pack. Many hands make light work and tentacles are close enough. 

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Vanyel and Tylendel have their own possessions packed by suppertime; Vanyel is only really taking what he took to k'Treva the first time and hasn't especially unpacked yet, though adding in a few nice tunics from his boxed possessions. Tylendel has to unpack boxes and dig out things he wants. Staven doesn't actually have any possessions here in Haven. He can borrow a set of clothes and the hertasi will go crazy making more for him, Savil promises. 

They all sit down to eat supper together. The last time in a while that they'll be eating in this room, Savil notes. 

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Lucy nods solemnly and appreciates the room and pays attention to how much Vanyel is eating and glances at Staven a lot. 

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Staven is still casting the occasion baffled look around him, clearly he's still finding the entire situation surreal, but he makes conversation with the others, cracks some jokes, teases his brother. 

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Vanyel is eating slowly because he keeps getting distracted by the conversation, but he finishes an entire good-sized plate of food eventually. 

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Good good. 

"I honestly wasn't bothered by what you said about my body," she mentions to Staven. "Where I'm from people really don't like magic so I had to spend my entire childhood hiding from everyone who wasn't my family so I casually say way worse stuff than that." 

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"That sounds really awful! Um, what didn't people like about magic?" 

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"That's sort of complicated--to be clear, it's not so much that absolutely everyone hates magic, it's that--lots of people do and it's not super safe to bet and in particular the tiny little town where we grew up did-- I think it's mostly bullshit religious stuff orignally, like, if something weird happens and it's not declared to be a divine miracle then probably it's evil, and like--it's just bullshit, honestly, like, if you took Vanyel or Tylendel to my hometown you could say they liked boys or you could say they did magic and in either case the people would look at them like you set their cat on fire and in neither case would it be anything but bullshit. Sorry for using you as an example," she adds to Van and 'Lendel. 

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Nod. "People back home - our parents, even - they were a bit like that with 'Lendel. His Gifts started awakening really early, and then a...thing happened, when we were twelve, and they came out way too powerful. And everyone said he was possessed." 

Tylendel tenses up a bit. Staven reaches out to squeeze his shoulder. 

"...And I knew he wasn't," he says quietly. "We've got a twin-bond, I'd be able to tell. And it was stupid, this is Valdemar, they knew about magic. It was even worse once they realized he liked boys, too. I think our parents sort of - gave up on him. Only reason they couldn't disown him is we were their only children and I was the heir, and wasn't about to stand for that." 

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"That really sucks. Wilbur and I didn't have anyone else, but we had Mother and Grandfather, they were in our corner completely. They did magic too and--they both died before I figured out that I liked anybody, but I can't imagine them caring that I like girls as well as boys."

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"...I really wish our parents hadn't died. They were still getting used to 'Lendel being a Herald – they would've been proud of him eventually..." 

Staven trails off. His expression darkens. "But then the stupid. goddamned. feud happened. I'm so angry with the Lesharas. It's completely Evan Leshara's fault. All of it." 

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"Well, he died in the Final Strike, and I'm not bringing him back any time soon, and I'll happily prioritize your parents once they figure out how to publicize this in a way that doesn't have people freaking out." 

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Staven nods. He hadn't felt like he could ask, but... "Then that's fair, I guess. He got what he deserved and we'll get to - keep going..."

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On Tylendel's other side, Vanyel unconsciously huddles closer to him. He knows he's not actually in danger - for one, he's the most powerful mage in Valdemar, and Staven isn't a mage at all, and even if he were angry at Vanyel personally, which he isn't, there's hardly anything he can do about it... But still. Angry-looking person near him = scary, regardless of how stupid that is. 

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Lucy reaches out across the table to put a hand on top of Vanyel's and squeeze it. 

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Vanyel takes a deep breath and tries to calm down.  

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Mardic starts asking Staven about farming practices back at his landholding, and Staven knows some things on the subject, and calms down as well as he's distracted. This gets them through the rest of supper.

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At which point something occurs to Lucy. 

:So I completely failed to think of this earlier but it's probably a good thing we're going to K'Treva sooner rather than later, because, where is Staven going to sleep?: she asks Savil. 

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:You know, I had also not thought of that. I could take the sofa and he can have my bed for a night, I suppose: 

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:That probably works for the one night.: 

She goes and curls up next to Vanyel. 

:I think I like your brother,: she tells Tylendel on his other side. 

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:I'm glad! ...What do you like about him?: 

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:He apologized for saying this wasn't what I really looked like when I explained even though I said it was fine and he wasn't weird about the fact that my natural form is giant and invisible and he gets that bullshit is bullshit and he cares about you a lot and honestly the fumble about me doing a good job at designing my human form was kind of endearing.:

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:Right. About that: There is definite embarrassment in his mindvoice. :He, umm... I know this because of the twin bond, he's - kind of into you. I guess you, er, did make your body attractive to, you know, people who like women– sorry, I mean, I can tell it's a good body too, just...: 

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:Oh. Um, I have--no idea what to do with that. I've never even kissed anyone before.:

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:Sorry!: 

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:I'm not offended or anything, I just have no idea how to handle this kind of situation. I think there's some kind of socialization about how to handle these things that I missed out on on account of spending most of my teenage years so isolated?:

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:That makes sense. I, um, I'm not sure – my teenage years were kind of a disaster and also I don't know if it's different for girls. Er, if it makes you feel better I don't think Staven would judge you for it: 

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:For never having kissed anyone before?:

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:For that, or for being, er, inexperienced with flirting, or any of it. I...won't say he's never judgemental about anything, but really not about that: 

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:That's good. --Would it be weird for you if I went for it? I don't want to change my never-been-kissed status more than I want to not make things awkward with you and Vanyel.:

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:No, I–: He stops. :It'd be a little weird for me. I think Van will just be happy for you. I don't mind, figure it's the kind of weird I'd get used to in about a day: 

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:Do you want to talk about it?:

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:...Does talking about it help?: It seems like the sort of thing that could help in theory but he has no idea what to say. 

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:It frequently does! It might not always? Your friend doing kissing-valence things with your brother might not be the kind of thing improved by thinking about it more.:

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:Hmm. I'm trying to figure out what's– Oh. I think it mostly feels like you're, um, a grownup? In a way Stav and I aren't? I don't know if that makes sense. But I think that's why it feels a bit weird - which doesn't mean that it's bad!: 

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:Oh! I'm not a grownup, I promise. I'm just, uh, I don't know, good at advice? Or something? And not very, uh, traumatized of a form that makes itself super evident day-to-day? I have been interacting with people I'm not related to for little over a year.:

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Tylendel giggles. :Well, all right, I'll take your word for it: Yawn. :I'd better sleep: 

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:Sleep well.: 

She pecks Van on the cheek and stands up and walks over to Staven and sits down beside him. She is only a little bit nervous, honest, please ignore any flushing in her cheeks. 

"So, um, I have never been kissed, and 'Lendel says you might be interested in helping me fix that." 

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Startled wide-eyed look! "I, um, I..." He turns bright red. "You're very beautiful!" 

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--She ducks her head and giggles a little. "Thanks. I, um, I did that on purpose? I like looking nice. It's good. It feels good."

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"Huh. Sometimes girls are funny about that kind of thing, they don't want to admit that they're pretty - or that they make an effort to be - but I think it's good too." He reaches out and puts his hand on her knee. 

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"Do we? I mean, they, I don't--I admit I feel a little silly to care about my appearance, but people are allowed to be a little silly, and I don't think that when it's other people so probably feeling like it's silly is sillier--but I don't see any reason at all to lie about it. But then, I don't see any reason to lie about most things people don't talk about openly, honestly. Maybe there's something I'm missing. Or maybe I'm not the one who's silly." She smiles at him. 

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He smiles back, then reaches out to sort of pet her hair, sliding his hand down to her neck. "...May I kiss you?" 

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She grins brightly and nods. 

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The next morning, whenever Lucy emerges, Donni is sitting at the dining table with Mardic. She immediately grins and waggles her eyebrows. "Had some fun last night, did you?" 

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"Oh, not too much. But, yes." She smiles at Staven. "It was nice."

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Staven smiles back at her. "It was!" 

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"Well?" Donni waits a moment. "Come on. Spill. Is he a good kisser?" 

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"How should I know? I hadn't kissed anyone else before."

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"That's fair! Maybe you should compare! You can kiss 'Lendel and Van can kiss Staven." 

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Tylendel, in the middle of wandering out of his room, stops in the hall. "–er, what?" 

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"Donni's just being obnoxious!" Lucy calls to Tylendel. "Donni, leaving aside the part where 'Lendel has a boyfriend, I imagine people are better at kissing when it is a person they are remotely attracted to, I refuse to contaminate my data by kissing people who don't like girls."

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"Fiiiine. Then maybe Mardic and I co–"

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"No," Mardic said without looking up from his plate. "Sorry, Staven, she's always like this." 

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Vanyel had followed Tylendel out into the hall. "What is going on?" 

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"I kissed Staven last night and Donni is being Donni."

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"Awww." Vanyel tugs a somewhat befuddled-looking Tylendel over to gather up some breakfast. 

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Savil catches up shortly later. "All right, everyone, we should be ready to go in a candlemark. ...Donni, were you up to mischief last night, I know that face." 

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"No, Lucy and Staven were," Donni says brightly. Eyebrow waggle. 

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Savil sighs, narrows her eyes briefly at Donni, and does not say anything to Lucy or Staven. 

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"It was just kissing, we did not have sex in your living room, promise. Also Donni was being, like, more Donni about it than strictly necessary."

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No comment. 

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"Obnoxiousness is one thing, but bad scientific research is quite another," she sniffs with a deliberate air of offense. 

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"Indeed. Well, let's get to the eating breakfast part." 

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Vanyel is moderately nervous about the upcoming Gate, but even so he doesn't need too much coaxing to clear his plate. 

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Lucy eats her own breakfast and chivvies Wilbur out of their room and makes sure everything else is absolutely ready to go before she raises a finger towards Van's forehead questioningly. 

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He glances over to make sure that Tylendel has his travel bag. Takes a deep breath. "I'm ready." 

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She performs the spell with a quiet murmur, carefully catching him so he doesn't fall over when the lights go out. 

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And then Savil flings up an illusion over their now-decent-sized party and leads them out across the grounds to the Heralds' Temple, where all five Companions are waiting for them.

"I am starting to feel like we're stretching k'Treva's hospitality, here," she says, but she raises her hands and casts the Gate. 

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"Is there anything I can do to help?"

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"Hmm. Honestly, I think all of us here can earn our keep. It's still kind of a lot to ask, dropping this many strangers on them, but...I think it'll be all right."

And the Gate is up! 

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Tayledras scouts come running! 

Starwind is the third or fourth person to arrive. "...Wingsister?" 

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"We have need of a place to stay again," Savil says in Tayledras. "May we?"

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Starwind's eyes alight on Tylendel, and go wide. "Yes. Of course." 

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And Savil leads the way across. 

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Lucy grins and bounces a little when Starwind spots Tylendel. 

(Lucy is very strong and has nigh-arbitrary numbers of limbs and can carry so much luggage.)

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As soon as they're through, Savil drops the Gate with a sigh of relief and sits down. "Lucy, you can wake Van up now." 

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Lucy nods and reverses the spell. 

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Vanyel's eyes fly open. "Wait, is it already– oh." He looks over at Tylendel. "See, ashke, isn't it beautiful here?" 

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Tylendel is staring around in amazing. "It is!" 

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Eeeeeeeee. 

"Have you managed to find a use for the basilisk bones?"

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Moondance catches up. "They were difficult to work with, but we have made some of them into weapons and tools for our scouts. Thank you, again." 

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"You're welcome! If there's anything else that's big and hard to kill but less ecologically important let me know. Especially if it tastes better than that." 

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A chuckle. "We will do that. Anyway. Starwind and I do not have space to host this many, so we will need to figure out where all of you are staying, but fortunately it is still early. In the meantime, I would invite you to come soak in our pool?" 

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She glances at Staven and Mardic, considers asking if that involves being naked, considers exactly how much she cares and how apparently they are already being something of a burden hospitality-wise and maybe she shouldn't make a fuss about silly things like nudity, which objectively doesn't actually matter that much, especially given that Mardic is super taken and she's already kissing Staven. 

"Sounds good." 

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The Tayledras don't seem to be fussed about nudity at all; Starwind is naked even before they reach the courtyard with their pools. 

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:You'll get used to it: Vanyel assures Lucy in Mindspeech. :I think it took me a few weeks to stop feeling like it was weird: 

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:It's not objectively a big deal--oh:

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It is, regardless, some amount of a big deal for Wilbur. He's half-frozen, having taken off nothing but his coat, hands trembling.

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"Wilbur, you don't have to," Lucy says quietly to her brother in English. 

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"It's stupid to be afraid. They won't hurt me. They've--they know what you're shaped like and they don't mind you. It's stupid." 

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"It's not stupid, Wilbur, you're allowed to not do things that are scary." 

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"But I don't want to be scared." 

He practically tears his remaining clothes off. 

From the waist up, his shape is mostly human. His coloring isn't; yellow-and-black markings cover his back. From the waist down, he is covered in shaggy black fur that covers his dinosaur-like legs and the dozens of slender tentacles that rise, swaying, from his hips (if there is anything else attached to his hips that serves a more recognizable biological function, the hair must be obscuring it). 

His right hip and leg have several patches of scarring, bare of hair and tendrils, that reveal dark greenish-brown skin that warps in the shape of more than half a dozen savage dog bites. 

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Neither of the Tayledras make any comment. 

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Donni tries so, so hard, and also manages not to make any comments. 

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Staven slips into the pool, and offers his hand to Lucy. "Wild dogs?" he asks Wilbur, sympathetically. "Oof. We had some nasty ones around my parents' landholding – one of them got me on the arm once..." He shows them the scar. 

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"Not wild ones." 

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"Wilbur had to break into a library because he needed a book there and the librarian decided he didn't like his face. The library had guard dogs." She hugs her brother very very tightly. "He almost died," her voice cracks, "he needed the book to take care of me and he almost died."

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"It was years ago. I'm alright, we're alright," he says, more to his sister than anyone else, gently stroking her hair. 

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"Wow. That librarian was a buttface. That's pretty heroic, though, doing that for Lucy. She's lucky you're her brother." 

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"I am the absolute luckiest," she agrees, releasing him and accepting Staven's hand. "The librarian is terrible. I hate him. I don't like hating people but it's kind of hard to stop so I just don't think about him much." 

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"I know, right? Mardic can decide to not hate people even when they were awful to him or 'Lendel but I don't get it at all." 

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"I don't hate the people from our hometown who said nasty things about us. Just the man responsible for the fact that Wilbur got really badly hurt," she sighs. "And I'd like to be able to let go of that, too, but--the scars are still there."

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"I get that." Mardic nods solemnly, then slips into the pool as well. 

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Donni grins and splashes him. 

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"Children, behave," Starwind says without looking up. 

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Wilbur lowers himself in slowly, attempting to take up only as much space as a reasonable-sized human being, without much success. 

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"Tell Wilbur he looks cool," Lucy prompts Donni. 

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Donni bites down a snicker, and nods. Then actually looks at Wilbur, and– "Ooh! Your tentacles look really neat in the water. Can they carry things, like Lucy's tentacles can?" 

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"Well--they're not as long. Or as strong. But things that are small enough, yes. I could carry my clothes with them if I wanted to."

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"Useful!" 

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Vanyel smiles softly at Lucy and then closes his eyes, relaxing in Tylendel's arms, k'Treva feels like coming home. 

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Awww Van. 

"It--should hopefully be more useful in the future. Without his having to keep them hidden because people are stupid."

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"We try not to be stupid here in k'Treva. If you notice us being stupid, however, you ought point it out so we can stop." 

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"I don't think I will, but I'll speak up if I do. And the reverse holds true. Except I'm a teenager and might have some teenage stupid even if I don't have any normal-people stupid."

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Chuckle. "I have seen little of that, so I will have to take your word for it." 

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"I don't know that I do, but I think it'd be hard to notice from the inside! I want to know if I'm doing things wrong because otherwise how can I stop."

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Moondance nods, serious again. "That makes sense. It is how I feel as well. ...I think that people make allowances for youth, and there are things you might do that would appear stupid if done by someone of Savil's age, but are mostly harmless and a part of growing. That is what Starwind has said to me - that I ought worry less that something was a terrible mistake, if it hurt no one, or no one but myself. Anyway. If I think you are doing something that is causing harm, I will of course tell you immediately." 

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"Good. There's a lot I don't know and--killing the basilisk wasn't stupid but I wouldn't want to kill another one, that's a good example."

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"Yes. You are still missing a great deal of context on our world, that even children would know– oh, I see the hertasi have been at work. Would anyone like some lunch?" 

A lunch spread has, indeed, appeared from apparently-nowhere beside the pools. 

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Giggle. "Wow, they're good at what they do, I didn't hear them at all and my hearing is much better than human. Vanyel thinks the hertasi are going to want to use me as a dress-up doll and I'm looking forward to it." She reaches for a food item and takes a bite, making a soft appreciative noise. 

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After lunch, Starwind can show various people around to where they're staying. They have room to host both Savil and Vanyel-plus-Tylendel. Lucy and Wilbur can stay with Snowlight, who lives nearby. Mardic and Donni and Staven can stay with Riverstorm, one of the Vale Healers. 

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:Vanyel how weird would it be to explain that I usually sing to you guys instead of sleeping.:

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:Not weird at all, I think?: 

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"I don't usually sleep so instead of wherever Wilbur and I are supposed to be sleeping I usually hang out wherever Vanyel and Tylendel are supposed to be sleeping, and sing," she mentions. 

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"Oh, right, I did know that you need little sleep. That is fine." 

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"What's Snowlight like?"

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"She is lovely! At least, in my opinion." Fond look at Starwind. "She is pregnant with our child, currently. Well, not our child by blood, but we will raise him once he is born." Moondance's face lights up with these words. 

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"Oh wow. I don't...think I've ever interacted with a pregnant woman before. Or a baby."

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"I am sure she would be delighted to meet you!" 

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"That sounds very nice." 

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Then after lunch, they can all wander over so Lucy and Wilbur can drop off whatever belongings they have, and meet Snowlight! 

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Snowlight is a tall, strong-looking woman with hair dyed in a weird camouflage-y pattern, wearing gorgeous embroidered silk robes. She's visibly pregnant but not that big, yet.

She smiles at both of the strangers and reaches to grip their hands when introduced, then beams at Vanyel and hugs him. Puts his hand on her belly. "Your babes-by-blood are coming along well, I think!" 

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"His what."

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Vanyel's cheeks are crimson. "I. Um. Long...story..." 

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"Moondance and I longed for a child," going by Starwind's glance at his partner, the longing was mostly Moondance's, "but - could not perform with a woman as would have been necessary, and also we try to bring outside blood to the Vales when we can, so we asked our good friend Vanyel for a favour. It was an incredible kindness from him." 

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Vanyel is even redder. 

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"Couldn't perform, okay, that answers, like, most of the questions I had. Congrats?"

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Starwind hugs his partner and looks very fond and proud. 

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Snowlight pats Vanyel's shoulder. "Why so sheepish? It was a wonderful thing you did!" 

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(Oh gods can they please just change the subject already.) 

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"So I'll be leaving my stuff with my brother, mostly, but I don't sleep much. But it's really nice to meet you, I've never--I mean I've been in cities, I've seen pregnant women, but I spent a lot of my life isolated and I've never met a baby or anything since I was one and I can't remember that."

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"They are not due to be born for another five months or so. It is a little too early to feel them kick, but - you can touch my belly, if you like. Everyone likes to touch pregnant women's bellies." She seems amused rather than annoyed about it. 

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She tentatively places a hand on the other woman's stomach. 

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It's surprisingly firm, solid. 

"I will tell you when I first feel them kick," Snowlight promises. "I hope you will still be here, then; it is a wonderful thing, an unborn babe's kicks, to share with someone for the first time." Her smile broadens. "If you are still here when they are born, of course, you may hold them too." 

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"That sounds really nice. Thank you."

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And Snowlight can help them get settled, just before a gaggle of other Tayledras youth show up and start introducing themselves all in a rush. Most of them don't speak Valdemaran; some have Mindspeech but some don't. 

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Vanyel can translate, but he's starting to look pretty overwhelmed. 

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Moondance watches, smiling slightly. :Would you like to speak our language?: he says eventually to both Lucy and Wilbur. :My lifebonded can give it to you - probably, that is, your minds are rather different from human ones: 

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:That sounds awesome!!!!:

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:Um--yes. How does it work?: