Okay brain, you're right, I need to stop being so fucked up about Ryan, and you've come up with a very clever dream to hit me over the head with this.

She pauses.

On the other hand, this doesn't feel like a dream. On the other other hand, I've had dreams before that involved thinking "this doesn't feel like a dream" and then I wake up and realize no, that's totally what dreams are like lol. On the... how many hands was that?... whatever, the point is maybe college is making me more sleep deprived than I realized.


Her next class is a huge lecture where the professor doesn't take attendance. She decides to lie down, closes her eyes, and hopes that she'll no longer be hallucinating after a quick nap.

When she opens her eyes the box is still there.

Okay, what's a test I can do to confirm I am definitely going insane, because clearly that's what's happening here, right?

She studies the purple text. "Arbitrarily large appendages can fit inside any of your orifices," it says. In theory, that should be easy to test. Except, as much as she's feeling desperate after getting dumped by Ryan, she's not quite ready to ask a random guy from down the hall to fist her yet. Except... she could do it to herself, right? And her mouth is an orifice, right? Not being entirely sure what the word "orifice" means, she Googles it, and discovers that the category "human orifices" technically includes ears, nostrils, tear ducts, and the urethra. Was the purple text really promising she could now get nose-fucked? She didn't need that image in her head. And regardless of what the text was claiming, she's definitely going to start smaller than that.

Here goes nothing, she thinks, as she tries to insert her entire hand into her mouth.

Her entire hand can go down her throat.

Jane yanks her hand out of her mouth. Did I used to be able to do that? Maybe insanity has just made my jaw unusually limber. She decides to try again, and keep going until she's elbow deep in her own mouth.

That works fine, and also is horrible. 

+1 ERO for body horror.

Oh god what did I just do?

More importantly, what does +1 ERO mean? Jane quickly skims the purple text until she finds the relevant section.

Info // Character Stats // Erogame Logic

At an ERO of 11, your life has become an erogame taking place in a mostly realistic setting. What happens to you might seem unlikely to others, but it won't break their belief in a sane universe yet. Witnesses will reach for explanations other than the Erogame, but they'll still notice the unusual events.

If you keep pushing probability to its limits, then probability will learn to be a bit more flexible down there, relax and take it in and not protest so much.

Jane rereads the text very carefully this time, trying to parse what it's implying. Is it saying that if she keeps trying to swallow her own arm, things will start happening to her that will break other people's belief in a sane universe? Or is it saying they'll stop noticing unusual events? And that first sentence... is it saying that a higher ERO score will make the real world... less realistic? What would that even mean?

Trying to make sense of it all, she goes back and studies the entire wall of text in front of her. It's attempting to be reassuring with "To Mine Own Me Be True" and "Everything's Better With Ero", but if this is like... aliens blasting text directly into her eyeballs or whatever, she's not sure she trusts the aliens' concept of "safe" or "worse results in the long run." She's also regretting not taking a picture of herself with her arm down her own throat, just to have some tangible proof she didn't imagine it, but she decides not to repeat the experiment, because if she's not going insane she doesn't want to increase the amount of collateral weirdness she inflicts on everyone around her.

She checks the time. If she hurries, she can make it to class on time—she didn't nap at all. Honestly I was kidding myself about being tired, she thinks as she leaves her dorm room.

Quest available: Size Queen

1. Take something at least 6'' in length and circumference into your mouth, ass, and vagina. +1000 XP.
2. Take something at least 12'' in length and circumference into your mouth, ass, and vagina. +5000 XP, +1 FUK
3. Take something at least 18'' in length and circumference into your mouth, ass, and vagina. +10,000 XP, +1 LST
4. Take something more than two feet in length and circumference into your mouth, ass, and vagina. +15,000 XP, 'Size Queen' skill.

Aaaaaaaah.

Jane's pace picks up even more than it already had. If anything else freaky happens she just might break into a run. She doesn't actually expect to be able to run away from the purple letters, but the alternative is screaming "nope, nope, nope" out loud. Apart from all the other issues with the "quest", Jane is not sure she needs to do anything that will make her (permanently?) hornier right now. She is going to go to class and then after class she is going to come up with a less horrifying way to test if she has gone completely insane or not.

The class is a literature class! The professor has decided to scrap the syllabus for today and instead teach Goblin Market by Christina Rossetti. 

This is an uncomfortably horny poem.

At first, the new lesson plan feels like, at worst, the universe playing a tasteless joke on her by making her read about a young maid who "She suck’d and suck’d and suck’d"—on fruit of course. Then as the poem went on, and described how the two sisters had suffered as a consequence of their encounters with the goblin merchants, Jane started to suspect she was being threatened. Yet she wasn't sure she was being threatened with—or even what the universe was trying to coerce her into doing. The obvious answer was it was trying to get her to take on the "quest" she'd just been given, but the poem's protagonists seemed to suffer more for responding to the call than refusing it. Maybe after class she'd try improving her BOD, which seemed relatively safe and relatively easy to verify, and would hopefully placate the universe, or the aliens, or whoever was behind all this, without her having to shove a traffic cone into three different orifices.

Jane noticed that she was suddenly just assuming all of... whatever this was was real. But if it is real, she told herself, ignoring it could be a hell of a lot more dangerous than just having a psychotic break, so in some ways I'm playing it safe, right? Right?

If the Erogame has a position on whether or not it is real, it doesn't tell Jane what it is.

Jane decides that once the horny literature class is over, her plan will be as follows:

• Take pictures of herself from various angles.
• Go to the women's locker room of the campus gym—because that's where they have one of those scales like at the doctor's office that uses an actual balance, rather than a spring scale that bounces around depending on how you stand on it.
• Weigh self, naked (another benefit of being in a locker room). Take picture of scale reading.
• Take more pictures of self, naked, from various angles.
• ???
• BOD goes up.
• Repeat, compare photos.

Jane may notice that she has five unassigned stat points she can put in whatever she wants.

Jane is not entirely sure how stat increases work. The purple text doesn't seem to come with drop-down menus. "Uh... help? Search how to raise stats?" she says, hopefully not too loudly.

An impulse appears in her brain to look at the little plus signs next to the stats.

Ohhh. Right. So the plan is:

• Take pictures of herself from various angles.
• Go to the women's locker room of the campus gym—because that's where they have one of those scales like at the doctor's office that uses an actual balance, rather than a spring scale that bounces around depending on how you stand on it.
• Weigh self, naked (another benefit of being in a locker room). Take picture of scale reading.
• Take more pictures of self, naked, from various angles.
• Air-finger the little plus sign next to BOD.
• BOD goes up.
• Repeat, compare photos.

No new mysterious purple boxes harass her on the way to the girl's gym. 

Jane considers taking her clothed "before" pics outside the gym, but then realizes the locker room mirror will probably be helpful for that. So she strides into the gym, flashes her student ID, and walks directly to the locker room, doing her best to show no sign of hesitation. Because taking progress pics is a perfectly normal thing to do, and not at all a sign she is having a psychotic break.

Is it Jane's imagination or are the people in this locker room dressed more skimpily than usual?

Hopefully it's not her imagination, because that would make her plan to prance around the locker room naked less conspicuous. After getting front, back, and side pics in the locker room mirror, find an open locker, shoves her backpack inside, strips completely naked, and puts her clothes inside too. Then, carrying nothing but her phone, she heads towards the scale.

"Eeep," says a fully dressed girl in the locker room.

+1 BOD for walking around the locker room naked. 

She ignores the fully-clothed girl. Jane knew lots of girls in high who wouldn't use a public shower without a swimsuit on, but college is a good time to get over that sort of thing. She's mildly annoyed just getting naked in the locker room was enough to raise her BOD, because it means she won't have a record of what she looked like naked pre-magic body transformation. Whatever. She tries not to react as she begins fiddling with the sliders on the scale.

Her stomach is notably flatter and that weird mole on her left shoulder she always felt insecure about has disappeared.

Now it's Jane's turn to shout "Eeep!". She could be imagining some of those changes... but a mole just disappearing is another thing. She cranes her neck to inspect her shoulder from all angles, just to make sure she hasn't gotten confused about the exact spot on her shoulder the mole used to be. The she does the same thing for her right shoulder—it isn't there either. Okay. She snaps a picture of the reading on the scale, then heads back to the mirror to get her naked set of before pics, or at least not-too-far-in picks. She makes sure to include close-ups of her shoulders and face this time.

Then she raises her hand towards the purple text and takes a deep breath in. She's hesitating, mainly because she's afraid her finger will slip and accidentally make her hornier instead of hotter. Being hornier than you are hot seems... problematic. Once she feels sure she isn't going to screw up, she hits the "+" sign hanging next to "BOD" in the air five times in steady, deliberate succession.

The plus signs disappear. When she looks down, she notices that her breasts are somewhat larger and perkier. 

Jane's heart starts beating faster. Suddenly it seems important to get this over with as quickly as possible. She snaps more pictures in the mirror, then weighs herself again—she has to force herself to stop long enough to get a picture of the scale—and finally goes back to her locker. She hopes her bra still fits.

She weighs the same according to the scale, although the fat may have redistributed itself. Her acne is gone, her arm muscles are present, her face is more symmetrical, and her hair day is amazing.

Her bra fits perfectly! Thanks Erogame.

A skill has been created by a special action! Trying on your bra has created the skill A Perfect Fit.

Info/Skills/A Perfect Fit

A Perfect Fit. Passive.

Your clothes always fit perfectly and flatteringly. You no longer get weird red lines or back pain when wearing a bra. 

Jane doesn't slow until she's outside the building entirely. She takes out her phone to review the pictures she just took. Her acne really does look like it disappeared... and it really doesn't look like just a difference in lighting. And she manages to find an photo of herself in a tank top a few weeks ago where the mole on her left shoulder is really obvious, at least if she zooms in, so she definitely did just have a mole magically disappear. And she doesn't really believe anymore that the increased perkiness of her boobs is just from unconsciously standing up straighter. Incidentally, it was awfully nice of the Erogame not to make her walk around without a bra until she could buy some new ones. Maybe if she hopes for more things the Erogame will just give them to her? I hope I randomly run into a cute guy who wants to be my boyfriend, she thinks to herself.

But if there Erogame isn't willing to be that nice to her, what should she do next? Maybe she'll try that quest after all, at least the first couple parts. She searches for "sex shop" on Google Maps to see if there's one within walking distance of campus.

Quest available: Boyfriend Quest

Find a cute guy who wants to be your boyfriend.

Success: 10,000 XP
Failure: -

...fair, Erogame. Fair.

So she'll keep her eyes out for cute guys. But XP sound useful, and the first quest seems like easy XP. At least if she can find an appropriate, um, object. She goes back to searching on her phone for sex shops.

There are several sex shops in her area, all named things like The Smitten Kitten. 

All the sex shop names seem so friendly and inviting. She had been half-expecting something really skeezy sounding like XXX ADULT VIDEO. She decides to go to the nearest shop by walking distance immediately.

The shop is brightly-lit, clean, well-organized, and aggressively nonthreatening.

"Hello!" says a very perky salesclerk. "How can I help you?"

"Uhhh..." Jane says. She had been envisioning herself just browsing on her own, without having to explain to the sales clerk that she is specifically looking for a dildo that is at least 12 inches in circumference and at least 12 inches long, and find the prospect deeply mortifying. "Can you, uh, point me to your dildos?"

"Sure!" says the salesclerk. "They're right over here, in between vibrators and buttplugs and just across the aisle from the erotica. We're having a sale today!"

That's awfully convenient, Jane thinks. Unless actually this is just one of those stores where everything is on sale all the time, so you think you're getting a good deal while paying normal price.

She eyes her options. Twelve inches around is a little under four inches diameter, and she thinks she has a good sense of what three or four inches looks like. Except... she'd hate to miss out on 5,000 experience points because she accidentally got a dildo that was only 11.5 inches around. She begins going through the larger options, carefully inspecting the packaging to see if they have exact specs.

All of the dildos have a length and circumference included!

It is unclear whether they had this useful feature before the Erogame intervened.

Jane begins mentally cataloging her options. What's the cheapest option that meets the "12 inches long, 12 inches circumference" requirement? And then, just as a matter of curiosity, she begins keeping an eye out for the absolute largest option. Not that she'd buy it. Surely not...

The absolute largest option is the Moby, a startling 36 inches long. 

It appears to be mostly decorative. 

When Jane sees the Moby, she stops in her tracks. She hadn't been expecting to see that in the non-threatening sex shop. She hadn't realized such things even existed. After getting closer, she takes a careful look at the label. 36 inches long... and 26 inches in circumference. Of course it is.

When she first saw the final level of the Size Queen quest, she'd figured the final level would require defiling a traffic cone or something. She wouldn't have been entirely surprised to stumble across an 18 inch dildo, but this monster was another matter entirely. It felt like another sign, like the goblin poem. Or is the fact that it feels that way a sign I'm sliding into crazy town? Still, she couldn't help but be curious... "Hey," she says to the salesclerk, "just out of, uh, curiosity, how much does this thing cost? On sale, I mean?"

This is insane. I'm not seriously considering this. What do "XP" even do anyway? She decides to try whispering a request for help under her breath. "Info XP. Info stats. Info level?"

The Erogame presents the same information about stats and level that it did when the game began.

"The Moby costs $500!" the salesclerk says cheerfully. "We mostly have it as a display piece."

"Valid. That's more than I'd want to spend on something that's just going to sit around my dorm room but uh..."

(why did you say that, idiot)

"...make sense."

She goes back to trying to find some options that are both more reasonably sized, and reasonably priced.

There are several dildos that proudly announce themselves to be GOOD BEGINNER'S DILDOS. 

Those are going to be too small. Uh, this store had better not be devoid of large dildos under $500, Jane thinks, as she continues searching for something not too large, not too small, but just right. Or I guess if it is, I'm going to find a way to come up with more money fast.

It also has several dildos that seem rather intimidatingly large.

Jane inspects their price tags and the dimensions labels that may or may have been there before the Erogame.

And she finds several dildos that she can purchase. 

Jane will purchase one of them!

Nothing impedes her as she goes home to use them. 

Step 1 once she gets back to her dorm room: deep throat the dildo. Yup, I can still do that. It maybe freaks her out slightly less than when she shoved her whole arm down her throat.

Step 2: Jane is hesitating now. This could be painful. On the other hand, if what she's about to attempt is as impossible she should document it, right? After some Googling and watching some videos online she belatedly realizes she will never be able to unsee, she concludes that while the human ass appears to be surprisingly flexible (who knew? people who like anal fisting, apparently), if she can get this thing all the way in her pussy, she'll have made a novel contribution if not to science then to pornography.

In spite the impressive feats she now knows her throat to be capable of, she wants to approach this as cautiously as possible. Until today, she'd been unable to get over her sense that actually having to interact with another human being to purchase a sex toy would be impossibly mortifying, but she does have a cheap (and decidedly not penis shaped) vibrator she'd ordered online, so she gets it out, pulls down her pants, and goes to work. She thinks about a story she'd read once about a woman getting abducted and raped by an extraterrestrial, except the alien explained it was all okay because he'd read her mind and knew she would enjoy it. This situation felt kind of like that—except she wasn't yet sure if she trusted the aliens or whoever it was projecting the purple text into her eyeballs, and it remained to be seen if she'd enjoy what they were asking her to do.

She begins fingering herself as a supplement to the vibrator on her clit, and eventually concludes she's as wet as she's ever going to get. With one hand, she grabs her phone and begins recording, being careful not to include her face, and with the other hand she grabs the dildo. She begins inserting it, slowly, expecting it to begin to hurt at any moment. It doesn't. It feels good. She keeps going, bit by bit, expecting to need to stop at any time, but she doesn't stop until the dildo's silicon ball sack is resting against her taint. She really did it. She pulls the dildo in and out a few times, awkwardly trying to get the action from a few different angles on her phone. Then she hits stop on the recording and pulls it out.

Step 3: Crap. Why didn't she remember to buy lube? The dildo is a bit slick from her juices, but that will that be enough, even with superpowers? She decides the only thing to do is deep throat the dildo again, this time making sure to really, really just slobber all over it. Guess I'm tasting my pussy now, but it's for a good cause. Then she presses the slobbery tip of the dildo against her asshole. Maybe using the vibrator more will help her relax? She tries it. Hope the aliens are enjoying the show, she thinks. Then she pushes the tip of the dildo in. It goes in easily. Then, without really thinking, she slams it the rest of the way in. It only hurts a little.

Holy shit I did it.

Size Queen subquest #2 completed!

+5,000 XP
+1 FUK

You have leveled up!

You have leveled up!

You have leveled up!

You have leveled up!

You have leveled up!

+1 BOD for contemplating alien voyeurs while you masturbate. 

The aliens made good on their promise, Jane thinks, and made me slightly hotter in the bargain. Maybe these aliens aren't so bad after all. Almost like being raped by someone who can guarantee you'll enjoy it because he can read your mind...

And with that thought, she comes.

Once she's had a chance to catch her breath—she contemplates her situation. Non-horny Jane still isn't quite sure she can trust the aliens, or whoever's behind the purple text. Sure, they've seemed all right so far, but well... she once heard a parable about a chicken who notices that the farmer has fed her every morning since she can remember, and therefore concludes he'll feed her every morning forever. And each day that goes by seems to confirm the correctness of her reasoning, until one day chops her head off because he's having chicken for dinner that night.

She figures whether she's destined to get the chopping block in the future or not, she should still find out what she's earned, if only short-term, from all these shenanigans. "Info, stats."

Stats informs her that she has an ERO of 11 and a BOD of 20. The BOD description has changed:

With a BOD of 20, you're the prettiest girl in the room, assuming the room isn't in Hollywood or full of supermodels. 

You can increase this stat through exhibitionism, and other acts that invoke the pure beauty and power of your physical form.

Holy crap, that is a lot of levels. According to her stats display, she now has 20 stat points to spend and a perk.

But first thing's first. She wants a second opinion on just how impossible what she just did was, and the best way she can think of to do that is to anonymously upload the video to PornHub and see what kind of comments it gets. After reviewing the video to make sure she didn't accidentally include her face, she creates her new identity, SuperPussy6213, and uploads the video with the title "Watch me take all TWELVE INCHES of this dildo".

Now, about these perks. What are her options?

Childe of the Night: Stuff happens, you get turned into a vampire, more stuff happens. These vampires are nothing like Anne Rice vampires, and no characters resembling anyone from her novels will appear at any point. Everything's Better with Ero Certified! 1 point + 1 fragment. Available at 50 ERO. Refunded at 80 ERO. 

Ero Inventory: Any portable sex equipment or clothing that you legally own can be summoned by you at will, and dismissed at will to return to its former location. If your ERO is under 50 and you are being observed, you must summon items to inside an unobserved container, or otherwise maintain deniability. If you are displaying cleavage and your apparent cup size is at least C, you may access up to 2000 cubic centimeters of general storage by reaching between your breasts; providing the object could reasonably have been stored there, if your ERO is under 50. 2 fragments. Available. Refunded at 60 ERO. 

Ero-Travel: Your perversions are so twisted as to warp space itself. At the moment of orgasm, you can teleport to any other point where you have previously had an orgasm, providing that both your origin and destination are well-trafficked public travelways (e.g. busy sidewalks, bus stops, subway platforms). While your ERO is less than 50 you must not be observed at the moment of vanishing, and any others present at the destination will happen to be looking away as you materialize, though they will be looking back very soon. At ERO 50+ you may take along any number of partners if you are all stimulating each other and orgasm simultaneously. Traveling longer distances may require more intense orgasms at the origin point, a greater number of previous orgasms at the destination point, or both. Persistent 'points' in space are calculated relative to whatever massive body's gravitational field dominates that point in space, including matching the rotation or orbit of that massive body. On arrival you will be matched to the velocity of your destination point. 'Simultaneous' times at the origin and destination will if possible be aligned to match the predictions of Special Relativity given your origin velocity, but cannot loop time. You can take with you whatever you are currently carrying with your own strength, including clothing. 1 point. Available. Refunded at 80 ERO. 

Erogame What Erogame: You forget that the Erogame exists. The game automatically levels up, distributes stat points, selects perks, accepts quests, and invokes skills in whichever way it thinks will make your sex life the most interesting. 1 point. Available. Never refunded. 

Fake ID: You have an alternative identity whose existence is recognized by governments and computers. You have all paperwork required to support this identity and can choose its background at will; if the alternate you is a different age, nationality, or sex then it is your responsibility to disguise yourself accordingly. No one can make the connection between your identities without you explicitly informing them or them catching you unmistakably in the act of switching. This perk does not modify people's senses of object permanence: someone who locks one of your identities inside a cell will be expecting the same person to be in that cell later. If you change your appearance, they may simply decide you have 'disguised yourself' as your alternative identity. You may take this perk more than once. 1 point. Available. Never refunded. 

It's good to know Childe of the Night is "Everything's Better with Ero Certified!", though Jane wonders if it still applies if she's more turned on by the idea of having a sexy vampire boyfriend than by being a vampire herself. Ero Inventory and Ero-Travel look useful, and... holy shit what is that doing there? Suddenly she's feeling the urge to pick a perk as quickly as possible, before she erases part of her own memory by accident or in a moment of temporary insanity. But neither "Ero" perks nor Fake ID seem obviously useful enough be snap decisions. What else is there?

Forbidden Love: You discover a long-lost sibling: your choice of age, sex, and full or half relation. You may choose to make this a fraternal or identical twin. Their stats begin near human norms. You were separated before the Westermarck effect could apply. Both of you will begin to find the other sexually attractive after your first month of living in the same house as ordinary siblings. You will not remember that this perk exists or that you selected it. 2 fragments. Available. Never refunded. 

Grape Salad: You are now a grape. Other grapes will recognize you as one of their own. You are automatically bisexual, and your PRV and adorableness will increase to an appropriate level. To avoid frustration, we encourage taking Fairytale Painslut along with this perk. 1 perk + 2 fragments. Available. Never refunded.

Goodbye: You may enter any one fictional continuum at the place and time of your choice, arriving in your current form and with your Erogamer powers. You cannot displace an existing character unless you choose to arrive at the time of an extrauniversal summoning, such as by Louise the Zero. You arrive without your metafictional knowledge of the continuum, and able to speak and write the local language. You cannot ever return to the real world. Even if the fictional continuum includes a 'real world' to return to, you will only return to the 'real world' of that fiction. In the true real world, nobody will ever know what happened to you, and any quests that would have depended on you will fail. 1 point. Available. Never refunded.

Home Base: You possess an upgradeable fortress home, initially small and bare, but expandable through the infusion of money, certain offerings, or the completion of various quests. Electricity, water, and Internet access are always provided. Your home initially has an unobtrusive outlet in whichever part of your local territory is most useful to you. Further outlets may be added with underground expansion, or at higher ERO, portals. You may designate small personal areas within your base as not being invadable. You may place vulnerable family and friends in this area, and personal mementos. You may not use it to store prisoners, treasures, or objects of power. 1 point. Available. Never refunded. 

I Regret My Life Choices: Remove any number of perks previously taken. Non-refundable perk points are lost permanently, refundable perk points will return later at the appropriate thresholds. 2 points. Available. Never refunded. 

Aaaaaaaaaaah...

Why is the Erogame so interested in giving Jane the ability to erase her own memory? And this time in service of incest?

But that can't be what all the remaining options are like. Grape Salad is... making her wonder if "grape" is a type of supernatural creature in a fandom she's never heard of, like "vampire". Goodbye is horrifying again. Home Base doesn't seem that useful right now, but could be useful if for some reason her life got a lot more dangerous. (Is the Erogame warning her her life is about to get a lot more dangerous?) And I Regret My Life Choices is pricey, but having the option there at high cost is better than not having it at all.

So far, Ero-Travel is looking like her best option.

I See You: You are able to perceive, remember, and have sex with anything that would ordinarily be undetectable by you, be misperceived by you, or slip out of your memory. 1 point. Available. Refunded at 80 ERO.

I'm Not Explaining This Again: After you have carefully, painstakingly, thoroughly explained an ero-related concept at least once (polyamory is not cheating, that is not where a clitoris is, how to tie a shibari knot), anyone else you meet will understand it after only a couple of sentences. 2 fragments. Available. Refunded at 70 SED.

Inheritance: You are informed of your hidden blood relation to any one person of your choice, including public figures. They were already aware of this relation and watching you from afar, but could not contact you for some plausible reason. Your revealed relation to this person displaces your biological relation to the corresponding family members. You will not remember that this perk exists or that you selected it. 2 fragments. Always available. Never refunded.

Innocence Temporarily Regained: Your BOD, LST, SED, FUK, and PRV stats are reduced to the minimum of their current levels and 39, 25, 8, 8, and 1. Until it reaches its former level, your PRV stat cannot increase by more than 1 point per 3 days. Memories linked to higher stats cannot be recalled until your stats have again risen to a corresponding level. Skills are not recalled until your stats rise to a compatible level. Your hymen is restored. You retain your ERO. You do not receive the Innocent Virgin status effect. 2 fragments. Available. Never refunded.

James Bond of Bondage: Your ties never cause unintentional pain, never come loose accidentally, and can be applied in less than 5 minutes, including to an unwilling subject who is otherwise being held down or restrained. 2 fragments. Available. Refunded at 50 FUK. 

Okay that's creepy. I See You could be interpreted a lot of ways, but somehow Jane suspects it is not about having sex with neutrinos. If there are already a fair number of invisible monsters running around (or totally visible monsters that just wipe your memory if you see them), being able to know about it would seem apartment. And the existence doesn't seem like that much of a stretch given the stuff she's already seem. Heck, in some ways it would just make sense. She needs to think about this one.

I'm Not Explaining This Again sounds useful, but maybe not the most important thing to get right away.

Oh come on, again with the offer to mess with your family relationships and make you forget it messed with your family relationships. Why?

Innocence Temporarily regained could be a nice safety valve for her stats getting way higher than she's comfortable with... except wait a minute, 1 PRV? Jane likes her PRV right where it is, thankyouverymuch, and the idea of being magically transformed into the least-perverted person in the world is no more appealing than being magically transformed into the most-perverted person in the world. And up to 25 LST, what would 25 LST and 1 PRV even mean? An insatiable craving for missionary? For hand-holding? It dawns on Jane that this perk might be a subtler version of the Chill-Day of the Night, meant to replicate a genre of... romance novel? porn? that Jane isn't into. Which would make passing an easy decision.

And after that, another perk that could be useful some day, but which she has no immediate use for. Hmmm.

Let's Not Turn This Rape Into A Murder: Although the Erogame would not in any case present you with a crippling threat and no alternative, this perk guarantees up front that no sexual assault or sexually motivated kidnapping will result in any damage your Erogamer's Body cannot heal. Think carefully before taking this perk: once you take it you can never again experience the crushing, absolute submission that comes from knowing your very life depends on pleasing your captor. 2 fragments. Available. Never refunded.

Library of Sodom: You automatically know any detail of abstract knowledge that you want or need about any sexual activity that has been described in public writing. For example, directions for how to tie a shibari knot, or that one ought to avoid striking the kidneys with a flogger. This knowledge does not convey skill. 1 point. Available. Refunded at 40 FUK.

Like Uber For Costumes: If you can find any manufactured fetish clothing (not a one-off creation, and you must not have been involved in inspiring it) that corresponds to a profession, you can act with the full skill of that profession while wearing that clothing. For example, using firearms while dressed as a sexy soldier. 1 point + 1 fragment. Available at 60 ERO. Never refunded.

Mad Inventor: You can create devices whose functions correspond to many Erogame skills and effects. These devices cannot be mass-manufactured, but can be loaned to others. You must wear steampunk goggles while wielding this perk. 1 point. Available at 30 ERO. Refunded at 70 ERO. 

Mad Scientist: Your powers give you the ability to test hypotheses about sexuality that conventional science cannot or will not investigate. Use all skills at double their base level whenever you are primarily seeking general knowledge. (Extracting the location of an enemy base does not count as 'general knowledge'.) You must wear a sexy lab coat while invoking this perk. 1 point. Available. Never refunded. 

Nice of the Erogame to reassure her that it wouldn't do that to her, except it sounds like it would put her in a situation where she has to suck dick really good or die. Thanks, Erogame. At least it's giving her fair warning that no it is not the benevolent alien boyfriend of her fantasies. As if some of the previous perks weren't warning enough. But if she is at risk of this, this perk deserves serious consideration.

The rest of the perks are a refreshing list of relatively sane options. Even the "Mad" perks are sane by comparison to Erogame What Erogame. But Uber for Costumes really stands out—could she guarantee acing her biology midterms by dressing as a sexy scientist? If so it's awfully tempting.

Mesmer Inoculant: Guarantee that the Erogame itself will not apply mind control, mind modification, mind replacement, or any other similar effects on any nonconsenting subjects. Effects in this category were either already happening, or are enacted by or on the Erogamer, who is assumed to be consenting to all mind alteration effects that they bring upon themselves by changing their stats, using skills, or taking perks. Anything that looks at first pass like the Erogame mind-controlling someone will in fact merely be probability manipulation; for example, taking the Yousexual perk only guarantees that the people you meet happen to already have been people who would otherwise have been attracted to you, without actually modifying any existing persons' preferences. Taking this perk will render some perks inaccessible and cause other perks to have significantly smaller effects. 2 points. Available. Never refunded.

Milliways: Sometimes, when you open a door, it will open to an interdimensional bar which connects you to other worlds. While you are in Milliways, time stops, and you hear all languages as your native language. You may meet alternate versions of your friends, harem members, or nemeses. First drink is free. Watch out on Valentine's Day. 1 point. Available at ERO 20. Not refunded. 

Naked Before Me: You may touch people as if their clothing and your clothing did not exist. Onlookers not clued in see your hand, shoe, or head resting quietly in the corresponding place---lewd, perhaps, but not obscene---and do not hear any sounds directly produced by the sex act, though they still hear other sounds made by your victim. Similar acts may be performed on you, including by accident. 1 point. Available. Refunded at 70 FUK or 80 ERO.

No: Choose one event to disallow either prospectively, or retroactively up to 24 hours earlier. The event will not happen, either then or at any time in the future. Ongoing processes are not 'events', but their starting points may be considered so. You cannot take this perk more than once. 1 point. Available. Never refunded.

Not Safe For Wizards: You are now a Sasha. Your artistic skill and aesthetic sensitivity will increase, your gender and sexuality will both reset to 'gay man', and your ethics will be replaced with a hardcore survival instinct. If nothing terrible happened to you age ten, watch out for men named Malcolm. 1 point and 2 fragments. Available. Never refunded. 

Perfect Sadist: Inflicting pain on others, no matter how severe, never causes any permanent damage you did not intend. 1 point. Available. Refunded at 40 FUK.

Mesmer Inoculant is the first time the Erogame has demanded a perk point to not do something. Two perk points, in fact, which means no matter how much part of her feels she's obligated to protect the world from the Erogame's mind-control, she can't do it right now. Why is the Erogame so reluctant to give up on mind control? Jane is puzzled—until she realizes that of course many of the things the Erogame claims to be able to do would be awfully difficult without mind control. She guesses maybe they could be achieved by "probability alteration", but she's not sure what that would even mean. Suddenly she's not so sure turning off mind control is a good idea. She doesn't want to mind control anyone for selfish reasons, but what about self-defense? And the Erogame might have a harder time keeping her safe behind the scenes if it can't just Jedi mind trick someone into not hurting her. For all she knows, the Erogame could plan on doing a lot of that behind the scenes without her ever noticing. And Everything's Better With Ero is a perk—does she want to risk significantly weakening its effects?

Milliways could be entertaining—or annoying if she has no control over when ordinary doors suddenly become doors to an interdimensional bar. Naked Before Me has a a similar potential to be either annoying or entertaining. "No" seems worth keeping a perk point in reserve for. Not Safe For Wizards is just bizarre—is this a TV show she's never heard of? And Perfect Sadist is like James Bondage, maybe useful in the future but no reason to take it now.

Real Scientist: Your unusual experiences have given you insight into open questions in human sexuality, leading you to form new testable hypotheses. You instinctively understand experimental methodology and statistics. So long as you report your outcomes honestly, other scientists will discuss your results seriously; and overlook your lack of credentials along with any questions about the morality or possibility of your experiments. You can write proficiently in LaTeX if you are wearing latex. If you simultaneously hold the perks Mad Inventor, Mad Scientist, and Real Scientist, you become able to develop reproducible technology, including the experimental apparatus required for others to further investigate and extend your discoveries. An actual PhD in a scientific field, acquired the hard way, can substitute for the Real Scientist perk in this trinity. 1 point. Available at 30 ERO. Never refunded.

S/layer: In every generation there is a chosen one. S/he alone will stand against and/or lie down with the vampires, the demons, and the forces of darkness. S/he is the S/layer. 1 point. Available at 55 ERO. Refunded at 80 ERO. Everything's Better With Ero Certified!

Seduce Contain Protect: You are a magnet for any person or sapient entity with a significant chance of producing global catastrophe. They will inevitably cross paths with you and find you highly attractive. 1 point. Available. Never refunded. Everything's Better With Ero Certified!

Sin Of: You may take this perk only once. Choose:

- Envy: Take over another person's life. Everyone in the world now believes unshakably that you are they. The displaced person no longer exists.
- Gluttony: You never get tired, bored, or over-satiated during any pleasurable act, no matter how long it continues. You may accumulate unlimited DOM and SUB from such acts.
- Greed: You find a winning lottery ticket with the lump-sum cash payout option selected. After all taxes are paid, your after-tax winnings are a bit over $100,000,000.
- Lust: At will, you may temporarily increase your LST and/or PRV to any higher level you wish, for as long as you wish, up to a maximum of 100.
- Pride: All stats and skills increase faster.
- Sloth: Removes all time limits for acceptance or completion of quests. Negates or softens all other visible deadlines for accomplishing anything within the Erogame or your life.
- Wrath: Instantly kill anyone you choose. Bypassing quest challenges in this way will reduce their rewards. You may invoke this perk an unlimited number of times.

1 point. Available. Never refunded.

Skip the Boring Parts: Invoking this perk gives you a SED*1% chance to transition directly to whatever sexual encounter (if any) you would otherwise have with a person. You can only invoke this perk on a particular person once. This perk cannot be used to bypass quest-related challenges. 1 point. Available. Refunded at 40 SED.

Damn, the Mad Inventor / Mad Scientist / Real Scientist trinity is powerful. She's not sure how she feels about the amount of collateral weirdness involved in getting ERO 30, but it's an important option to be aware of. And she guesses she could start with Mad Scientist, which doesn't have an ERO requirement, though given that she's yet to acquire any skills beyond the ones she started with, she's not sure how much immediate utility it would have.

Laying down with vampires is the first perk option that really makes her think that could be hot rather than that could be useful. Maybe she should take it? If everything really is better with ero, you could argue that playing it safe actually means doing whatever makes her horniest. Except it requires a whopping 55 ERO, which isn't in reach even if she blew all her stat points on it. And she's even less comfortable with that much collateral weirdness than she is with the collateral weirdness required for the Science! trinity.

But seeing S/layer on her perks list—along with the SCP perk—has another upside, forcing her to realize just how willing the Erogame apparently is to create monsters from whole cloth if it would make her horny. Well, the perk descriptions don't say they world isn't already crawling with vampires, demons, and multiple global catastrophic threats, but it seems unlikely. Which probably means I See You shouldn't be interpreted as meaning the world is already full of invisible monsters she'll be forever oblivious to if she doesn't take the perk. Good to know.

Most of the Sin Of perks sound dangerous... and kind of disturbing, especially combined with everything else she's seen so far. Rather than the benevolent alien boyfriend she'd been imagining while jerking off, it was more like a wizard had shown up on her doorstep saying, "Hello m'lady, my name is Merlin, I am at m'lady's service. What do you want me to do? Make you rich? Turn you into a vampire? Kill everyone you dislike? I will even stop mind controlling people if m'lady insists, though I'd really rather not do that."

Though she has to admit Sin of Greed doesn't sound too bad. A quick Google search confirms her memory that the whole idea of lottery winners usually winding up broke and miserable is a myth. The worst thing about Sin of Greed might be the risk that it could be a waste of a perk. Licensing mad science inventions could make her a billionaire, not just a multimillionaire, if she decides to go that route. Or she could just crank up her BOD and have a career as a supermodel. And if the Erogame is like other video games, she can expect to get quests with escalating monetary rewards as she rises in level. If a perk could be rendered superfluous three different ways just off the top of her head, maybe it isn't so useful.

Skip the Boring Parts sounds uncomfortably mind-controlly, and maybe not even useful given that, as she was reminded when the Erogame started, right now nothing is stopping her from just asking boys "want to fuck?"

Slightly Smarter: The cognitive subprocesses comprising your soul improve slightly in efficiency and computational power, corresponding to a rough gain of 3 points of IQ as it would be measured by contemporary tests. This increase in intelligence is not a game feature; it is real and applies to the true inner you. You may take this perk more than once. This perk is incompatible with Slightly Stupider, and you cannot choose one after having taken the other. 1 point. Available. Never refunded.

Slightly Stupider: The cognitive subprocesses comprising your soul decrease slightly in efficiency and computational power, corresponding to a rough loss of 3 points of IQ as it would be measured by contemporary tests. This decrease in intelligence is not a game feature; it is real and applies to the true inner you. Gain two additional perk points, for a net gain of one perk. You may take this perk any number of times, but you must have one perk point available to start each such series. This perk is incompatible with Slightly Smarter, and you cannot choose one after having taken the other. 1 point. Available. Never refunded.

To Boldly Come Where No One Has Come Before: You somehow get your hands on a starship, enabling you to visit nearby star systems and meet the many interesting and nubile life forms to be found there. 1 point + 1 fragment. Available at 55 ERO. Refunded at 85 ERO.

Truth: Regardless of any other Erogame perks taken and any other powers affecting you, you regain your memories of who you really are, what really happened, and what reality was like before. No further such effects can deceive you. Think hard before taking this perk. 1 point. Available. Never refunded.

Wait I'm Not Ready For This: You may delay up to 10 points of gain in each stat, and up to 5 Lvls of gain in each skill, until you permit it to go through. This does not otherwise affect rates of experience gain or the leveling curve. Permittance may be done partially. Permittance is irrevocable. When first taking this perk, you may apply it retroactively to any gains within the last week. 1 point + 1 fragment. Available. Never refunded.

Zombie Sexpocalypse: An extremely contagious virus turns 99.99% of the human population into sex-maddened creatures bent on fucking anything within reach. You, and everyone you personally like, are among those naturally immune to the disease. While most of the infected die quickly, some retain sufficient intelligence to become hominid animals living off the wilds or on food stores. Defending against their rapes and thefts is an ongoing problem requiring the survivors to band together. Some partially-immune survivors have greatly increased LST and PRV. Use this perk if you're tired of living in a complicated technological civilization. Think carefully before taking this perk, as I Regret My Life Choices may lead to the plague being cured or the zombies dying out, but will not undo the previous effects. 1 point. Available at 30 ERO. Refunded at 80 ERO. 

Given that there are only so many perks she actually wants, it seems likely she'll take Slightly Smarter eventually. Which makes passing on Slightly Stupider an easy choice—it's unfortunately it rules out taking Slightly Smarter, otherwise she could "borrow" perk points using her brain as collateral.

To Boldly Come only makes sense given the other "turn your life into genre fiction" perks.

Truth is... unsettling. Jane can't help but notice that she got stat points to distribute at 1st level, but no perk point. Or did she? What if at 1st level she took one of those perks that makes you forget the perk exists?

Wait, I'm Not Ready For This looks like the safety valve she initially thought Innocence Temporarily Regained was. Glad to know that's there.

And finally, the last perk on the list...

WHAT!?

WHY!?

Sin of Wrath was bad enough, but she'd have to be very committed to mass-murder to kill any significant fraction of the Earth's population one at a time. But now the Erogame is telling her that once she reaches 30 ERO she'll basically be handed the equivalent of the nuclear codes. This is a good reason to never, ever reach 30 ERO if at all possible. Even if she can pull that off, the mere existence of this option is making her brain want to jump out of her skull.

Maybe she should just take a relatively harmless perk NOW, to make absolutely certain she doesn't somehow wind up taking a more disturbing option in the future. The memory-tampering perks have her freaked out enough that she's tempted to take Truth immediately. But the perk description tells her to think carefully before taking it, and—

Oh crap I forgot to eat dinner. If she sits around contemplating the Erogame any longer, things are going to start closing and her dinner options will be severely constrained.

But she has one thing to do first: being the prettiest girl in the room is a nice start, but she'd rather be the prettiest girl in the school, at the very least. She hits the "+" sign next to BOD ten times—she can figure out what to do with the other half of her stat points later. Raising SED might be a good idea, but if 30 BOD is enough to get the boys fighting to seduce her, FUK might be more useful for keeping a guy. (The idea of significantly raising LST, PRV, or ERO is still too intimidating at the moment.)

With that, she pulls her pants back up and heads off to dinner.

Esther Kane, the pretty girl from Jane's class, is in line at dinner. 

"You're new."

"No I'm not," Jane stammers.

"No I'm not"? What are you doing Jane. Stay cool.

"We have class together. I'm Jane?"

She maybe should not have made that last statement sound like a question.

"--oh, that's embarrassing, I'm sorry. I could have sworn I've never seen you before."

Jane, panicking that she totally didn't think through the implications of raising her BOD 17 points in a few hours, opens her mouth to argue that she really is Jane, Esther's classmate, only to realize after an awkward pause that Esther already believes her. So instead, she says, "Esther, right?"

"Yes."

Esther begins to fidget. Because of who Esther is as a person, this means she stands en pointe and spins around slowly. 

Possible unexpected side-benefit of suddenly becoming much hotter: maybe the pretty girl who was previously too cool to hang out with me will want to be my friend?

"Are you a dancer?"

"Used to be a professional at the NYC Ballet but then I got a career-ending knee injury."

"Wow. I mean I'm sorry. I mean the knee injury sucks, but also it's impressive you got that far?"

Also, are you going to dance your way through the lunch line now? Jane wonders as the line starts moving again.

Esther is absolutely going to dance her way through the lunch line. 

"Well, I really loved dancing. --What about you? What do you do for fun?"

Quest Available: Lesbian Until Graduation

You're straight... at least so far. But sexuality is fluid and college is a time for experimentation. And Esther is really pretty.

Success: +10,000 XP, +1 LST, The Nectar skill
Failure: ???

"For fun I like to... uh... sit in my dorm room, listening to Adele, feeling sad about Ryan dumping me."

Keeping this conversation going without looking like an idiot (or even while looking like an idiot) is taking too much attention for her to think about how she feels about the quest that just popped up. She really should have raised her SED.

"That doesn't sound very fun but I suppose it takes all types."

"Right..." Jane says, shrinking with embarrassment. She begins assembling a burger, glad for something to do while she tries to think of what to say next "So what do you like to do for fun? Besides dancing your way through the dinner line?"

"Oh, you know. Wild parties, Burning Man, spinning poi, writing poetry, proving theorems, my homework. The usual."

"Oh. Wow. That's amazing. What year are you?"

"Freshman. You?"

"Same. Was last summer your first Burning Man?"

"No, I'm 26. Ballerina, remember?"

"Sorry. I don't know anything about ballet, I didn't know if it was like acting where you can have a career from when you're five. You, uh, probably know a lot of stuff about a lot of things I know nothing about. Like, what's burning man like?"

"Entirely too many people walking on their hands. I did not feel special at all."

This makes Jane crack up, almost dropping her meal card as she goes to swipe for her dinner. "Is that why you came here? So that you could be the most amazing person on campus?" Oh my god I did not just say that.

"You're cute."

"Thanks. Uh, where do you usually sit?" she asks, surveying the half-empty cafeteria.

"There," Esther says, gesturing to a table with twenty people already sitting at it. A few of them wave at Esther. 

"Got any room for me?"

Part of Jane is relieved. She isn't quite sure what she feels about Esther—aside from the possibility suggested by the Erogame, there's also "envious" and "intimidated" as possibilities. But if one of Esther's friends is a cute, single guy, maybe she can avoid needing to figure that out.

"Sure!" she says. 

And there's a conversation about classes, math, the merits of assorted modernist poets, and what happened at parties that Jane is insufficiently cool to be invited to.

Listening to Esther's friends talk is enough to convince her that no, Esther wasn't kidding when she talked about how she spends her free time. As the cafeteria's population dwindles, Jane wonders how long the little salon will go on—she doesn't want to be lame by being the first one to leave, or even the first one to suggest she really should get working on homework soon.

Eventually everyone trickles away!

When Esther leaves, Jane gives her a "see you tomorrow!" and them promptly leaves herself, doing her best not to let her current state of confusion show. She heads back to her dorm to see if her video on PornHub has gotten any comments yet.

+1 BOD for nude pictures

Quest available: You Can Leave Your Hat On

You must complete a quest before you can advance your BOD beyond 30!

Walk around naked in public for 24 hours.

Success: BOD 31, +5000 XP, +5 ERO

Info // Online Presence:

You earn 10XP each time somebody comes:

- While looking at a non-retouched picture or video of you.
- While listening and paying attention to your recorded voice.
- While reading an erotic story you wrote that is entirely based on true events.
- While looking at an erotic drawing that you personally drew.
- While watching a hentai for which you provided at least one of script, storyboards, or voice acting.
- While playing a VR game whose models and motions were captured from you.
- While interacting with an AI that was programmed by you or trained on data you generated.
- While playing an eroge whose character routes feature you and your companions.

Only one orgasm per session will be counted. Repeated edging or ruined orgasms may qualify at the Erogame's discretion. Forcing or incentivizing orgasms (e.g. as mandatory supervised daily sessions within a territory you rule) reduces per-orgasm XP gains, but does not eliminate them. Promoting or advertising your online presence carries no penalty.

For details of how you are currently doing online, check Info // Online Presence // My Metrics. Advanced ad-free metrics can be unlocked by paying $5.99/month.

"Huh."

She didn't want to say "no" to a quest like that. BOD 30 had been enough to get someone she previously hadn't been nearly cool enough to hang out with to notice her, but the Erogame had said a "perfect 10" was BOD 40. Why shouldn't she magic herself into a perfect 10, if the Erogame had that on offer?

She vaguely remembers hearing about a college student who somehow got away with going to class naked for some time before the university put a stop to it, maybe Googling him would give her some ideas for reasons she could give for going to class naked? Oh shit, he killed himself she suddenly realizes as she reads his story. That's depressing. Still, she might be able to borrow his arguments about the inherently oppressive nature of clothing.

This could be a good test of just what Erogamer's World lets her get away with too. Actually, now that she thought about it, the idea of showing of her new BOD to the world was kind of sexy, which meant if the Erogame was to be trusted, walking around naked for 24 hours definitely couldn't have worse results in the long run than not doing that.

On the other hand, 30 BOD seemed to be serving her pretty well for the time being. Just because she wants to go higher eventually doesn't mean there needs to be a rush. In fact, before she increases her BOD any more, maybe it would be a good idea to go to class tomorrow and see just how many people give her the "you're new" treatment.

Anyway, what's this about earning XP for her "online presence"? "Info, online presence, my metrics" she whispers.

Info/Online Presence/My Metrics

You have uploaded: "Watch me take all TWELVE INCHES of this dildo"
"Watch me take all TWELVE INCHES of this dildo": has: 435 views!
You have caused: 92 orgasms!
You have earned: 920 XP!

Wow that's a lot of, uh, masturbation happening while I was at dinner.

But 920 XP is pretty damn good for just uploading a crappy cellphone video to one site. She should scale this. After spending some time researching all the places one can post porn to online, she settles for uploading the video to a half-dozen video sharing sites and posting the links on a dozen subreddits as being at least a good start. Maybe she'll do more later—she had no idea how many porn subreddits there were.

She figures that's probably as much Erogame as she's going to get done for the day, so she gets to work on the anthro assignment she's been putting off... only to remember she hasn't picked out a perk. She looks at the perk selection again. Re-reading the perks, it seems pretty obvious she's got a ways to go before any of them are terribly useful... except maybe the Truth, if something is already fucking with her memory. Also because it could prevent anything from fucking with her memory again in the future—something that seems like just about the worst thing imaginable.

What if she already voluntarily had her memory messed with? She can't imagine why. A life only worth living because you edited your own memory doesn't seem like much of a life. And it's possible that at 1st level she took a perk of the form, "make the horrible thing go away, and forget it ever existed"—if the thing was sufficiently horrible, maybe her past self thought that was a good trade, but she suspects the "make the horrible thing go away" part would have been more compelling to past!Jane than the "forget the horrible thing ever existed" part. In that situation she thinks, her ideal solution would be to make the horrible thing go away but still remember it.

What are other reasons she might have tampered with her own memory? Maybe to forget something horrible she'd done... but if she's secretly an evil person, she should really face that before doing any more playing around with what claims to be a source of ultimate cosmic power (or at least cosmic power enough to turn 99.99% of the population into sex zombies). Maybe she had some information that couldn't fall into the wrong hands, but if so, wiping her memory when the Truth perk was right there was a terrible plan. Honestly, if past!Jane messed with her own memory, she deserves to have present!Jane undo that, because what kind of idiot wouldn't see that turn of events coming?

The other possible downside of taking Truth is she won't ever be able to mess with her own memory in the future... but the options the Erogame is presenting her with for doing that all seem kind of insane. Maybe in the future she'll want to erase some past trauma from her memory, except the Erogame seems to be promising her she can't be traumatized for life anymore. And even if in the future she really, really wanted to forget something, after she forgot the thing, the Truth perk would still be there, and she'd no longer be able to remember a good reason for not taking it.

Okay Erogame, I think I've thought sufficiently carefully about this. She taps the perk's name with her finger.

Her memories do not change!

Several perks gray out to indicate that they can no longer be taken. 

Well, that's several bad decisions I no longer have to worry about making.

She finishes her anthro assignment somewhat hastily and gets ready for bed. She already came once today, but doing it again still seems like a good idea to help her get to sleep. As she lies back, vibrator in hand, her mind wanders to the thought of kissing Esther—would she really enjoy that? Maybe not. She's still pretty sure she's straight—she's had plenty of crushes on guys, but never on girls. So maybe it wouldn't actually be much fun to make out with Esther... or have Esther suck on her nipples... or—

She forces her attention back to an image of Daveed Diggs handcuffed shirtless to a table, and keeps it there until she comes. Then she falls asleep.

In the morning her attention is drawn to the bulletin board, which seems to have acquired several new fliers overnight. 

> read ye fliers

Fliers advertise:

-Consent is Sexy workshop!
-Kissing booth to raise money for queer-inclusive sex ed classes for underprivileged youth!
-Corset modeling! Earn $$$!
-Need to pay off student loans? This workshop will teach you to make YOUR porn career work for YOU!

Money is good. The purchase of the giant dildo yesterday still stings (even if she got 20 stat points out of the bargain), and it would be nice to be able to make that up. So she'll definitely follow up on the modeling job, and maybe the porn workshop—though she reads the flier carefully for any hints at whether this is more "sell videos of yourself jerking off" or "get fucked on camera for money". While she's at it, she takes a look at the date and time on the Consent is Sexy workshop—who knows, it could actually be sexy.

Consent is Sexy workshop is tonight, porn workshop is tomorrow, modeling job says you should call anytime. 

Jane takes down the info for all three. She'll call the modeling job immediately—she's got time, she designed her class schedule to let her sleep in a bit, but she hasn't actually been staying up that late.

The modeling job is happy to take her in for an interview.

Jane asks if they have any interview slots open tomorrow morning.