Queen Elspeth (aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah why is she being interrogated in front of the LITERAL QUEEN) is sitting at the back, quietly listening. 

Herald-Mage Savil - who Shavri also finds kind of intimidating even though Van's tried very hard to convince her out of it - has been mostly leading the questioning, so far. She seems mostly exasperated about it. 

The Heralds have also clearly been running out of energy for formalities. Savil lowers herself into her chair with a grunt, then glances at the man across from her. "Jay, Truth Spell?" 

"On it." 

Herald Jaysen is also scary but mostly because Shavri knows that he was mean to Vanyel kind of a lot. 

Queen Elspeth lifts a hand, somehow instantly drawing the attention of everyone in the room. "First-stage only will do fine, for this." 

Shavri tries not to sag visibly in relief. She's been telling herself, over and over and over, that she isn't a criminal, she hasn't actually done anything illegal or morally wrong, she was asked to save someone's life and she tried her best and in the process learned a lot more about a possible threat to the Kingdom. 

Her internal reassurances are a lot less comforting than she would prefer, though. 

Nod. 

"So, I think where we left off, was - 'Leareth's' organization deciding to go to the Moon? Can you, er, back up a couple of steps and explain why, again?" 

Shavri's main recollection is that there were a lot of things happening very fast and all the people around her were clearly extremely busy and stressed, and also she STILL feels guilty about insisting that she had to go home rather than keep helping. 

"...Everyone was panicking about something, but they were mostly talking about it in private Mindspeech? I told them I wanted to go home. The - person who seemed to be in charge with Leareth too sick for it, Nayoki, was really obliging about it even though she was obviously so stressed. They got me a Gate. Julie wanted to tell me good luck and, er, to investigate 'penicillin' which is some sort of medical treatment their world has. And...I'm not even sure, somewhere in the middle of that I overheard them talking about taking Julie's ship to the Moon. Because - they were scared of what the Proto was doing? Or something? But I wasn't actually there when they were making the decision, I'd gone to take a break." 

Queen Elspeth's fingers tap on the arm of her chair as she listens, her expression thoughtful and distant. 

(Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah the Queen is PAYING ATTENTION to her -) 

Herald-Mage Savil strokes the tip of her nose.

"You think they were bringing the Proto with them, to the Moon?" 

"...Um, probably? I mean, that's - the obvious thing to do, right, I'm - not sure what had them spooked but probably it was something about the Proto getting stronger and harder to contain? I don't know, maybe it figured out how to infect people through the air, it was trying that at one point -" 

(Because she was STUPID and gave it DUMB instructions and maybe the world will get eaten and it'll be all her fault...) 

"Anyway, if that happened they'd want it to be isolated, right? And they had the ship, which was able to fly that far. Seems like it'd be a smart plan, to take it there." 

A very long pause. 

"Would they have taken Leareth with them," Savil says, tonelessly. 

"If they were worried about the Proto infecting everyone, probably? He was, er, very infected." 

Something hardens in Herald Jaysen's expression. He looks over, makes eye contact with Herald Keiran. 

She dips her chin, meeting his eyes in pleased, almost smug acknowledgment. 

For a (very stupid and pointless) fraction of a second, Shavri wants to hit them. Both of them. They're - what - they're gloating, that Leareth was infected, that he's dying - might be dead by now, his condition was so precarious.

She only learned afterward that he was gathering an army to conquer her homeland. That Vanyel, her closest friend - the father of her precious baby girl - was destined to die trying to stop him. 

...That, apparently, he's immortal and evil and ruthless and has no scruples and needs to be stopped. 

He was her patient. 

He talked to the Proto. Treated it - no, 'like a person' isn't right, it's clearly not a person, that's half the point - half the mistake that she herself was making, early on...

He wanted to talk to it, though. 

He wanted to find common ground. Wanted to build things with it.

He thought it was beautiful... 

Shavri doesn't know what to believe, anymore. 

"Is it going to eat the Moon and destroy the world." 

Shavri blinks at him for a moment. 

"...How would I know? I, um... I think Leareth figured out some things, about it - about what it was built for and all - but it's not like they were trying to keep me up to date, that wasn't my job, I was focused on keeping the two of them alive!"

Which she DID, damn it, and it feels like literally nobody has even tried to convey a single bit of appreciation for her efforts and cleverness on that front. 

After another very long pause,

"What was your impression of Leareth?" 

"I'm not sure I got a very good impression of him, since he was, er, dying of being eaten by alien goo the entire time!"

The Queen of Valdemar is still LOOKING at her. 

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah. Think. Focus. Thinkthinkthink. 

What would Randi have noticed, that she didn't at the time...

"Um, he was polite and respectful to his people and they seemed to think highly of him? He - likes math a lot? I think he was impressed that I, er, was the first one who figured out how to communicate with it with prime numbers." 

Which was thanks to Van. Who, apparently, has spent the last several years having intermittent dream conversations with Leareth. It shouldn't hurt, that he never told her - of course he didn't - but it stings anyway. 

Shavri hates everything about her entire life that has, apparently, brought her to this point. 

"- He didn't want to destroy it," she manages, finally. "The Proto, I mean. ...Neither did I, but that was mostly - just pragmatic? I couldn't, it was already too strong, the only way to keep the patients alive was to talk to it. But he.... I don't know. It felt different." 

"So he wanted our entire world to get eaten by an alien parasite?" 

"No!" 

Shavri kind of wants to cry from sheer frustration but she won't. She can do this. 

"- He's not evil," she manages, finally, when her throat is willing to let sounds through again. "He's - complicated - but not evil." 

Savil looks tired and frustrated and not at all like someone who believes her. 

They ask her more questions, after a while. 

She's so tired and so frustrated and everything hurts but she does her best to answer anyway. 

Eventually, it feels like an eternity later, there's a long pause in the interrogation - just like so many others before it - and then the Queen stands up. 

"I think we're done here. Jay...?" 

It doesn't feel like anything from Shavri's perspective, having the Truth Spell removed, but that's what he's doing. 

Apparently she's being dismissed? 

Shavri trails out of the room after Herald Jaysen, staring at the floor, feeling like at any second one of them is going to grab her and shake her. 

She desperately wants to talk to Vanyel, and at the same time she really really doesn't. Also it's late and it seems plausible he's asleep by now? At least, if he were being responsible he would be, which is - dubious - but she doesn't want to discourage responsibility. Also she's very tired and a coward. 

One of the other Healers is looking after Jisa for her, and Randi is - somewhere, apparently she sort of blanked out their last conversation - and it feels like she's spent the last two days straight surrounded by people who WANT things from her. To the point that breastfeeding her baby daughter this morning hurt because that was just another shape of obligation. 

Shavri finds herself pausing on the path through the gardens, alone, halfway to the Healers' rooms (where she's desperately hoping that Randi isn't.) 

The moon is about half full. She stares up at it. Tries to gauge whether it looks unusual, yet. 

Not yet.

Well. She's done her duty here, right? The Heralds know what to look for. It's in their hands, now. 

(This doesn't really make her feel any better.) 

She probably ought to go find Randi. She doesn't, though.

She collects her daughter, and snuggles and bounces Jisa in her new baby carrier while she paces her room, alone. After a couple of minutes, she starts crying uncontrollably. Which upsets Jisa, inconveniently. 

Elsewhere, a young man is also pacing - outside, by the riverbank - and also in tears. 

:Van?: A tentative Mindtouch. :Do you want to talk about it, love?: 

:No. I don't know. What's there even to talk about: 

A soothing yet faintly exasperated mental sigh. :Your feelings? Which you're clearly having: 

Vanyel kicks at a clod of dirt. 

:Fine. If you want me to talk to Lancir tomorrow I guess I can. Please just leave me alone. I'm not going to jump in the goddamned river or anything: 

:I'm not worried about that, love. I know you:

Yfandes paces her own circle, half a mile away, through grass that glimmers moist with dew under moonlight. 

:I'm here for you, all right? If you need to be alone right now, I understand, just - I'm still here, whenever you need company instead: 

Vanyel sends wordless acknowledgement and then shields her out and flomps down to sit beside the river. Watches moonlight catch on eddies in the rapids. 

She's so much better than he deserves, and it hurts– no. Something hurts but it isn't, quite, that. 

Leareth is up there, somewhere. Dying. He's probably scared. Imagining it sort of breaks Vanyel's brain. 

Elsewhere, Herald-Mage Kilchas climbs the astronomy tower, and sets up his best telescope, and studies the sky. 

Nothing different, so far. But they wouldn't be able to see the ship from here, not even with the best telescope in the world. It's too small and too far away.

"You're allowed to grieve for him," Lancir says, quietly. 

It's the next day. Nothing much has changed, including the Moon. 

"We don't know that he's dead." 

Lancir just looks at him, in that level piercing way. 

"He'll probably come back, right? Even if he doesn't make it?" 

A sigh. "You've said so." 

How is he even supposed to respond to that. What are his stupid feelings even about, he - doesn't, actually, have any good reason to be sad about Leareth's plight. Scared, sure, he sort of thinks the Heralds should be a lot MORE scared than they are... 

Lancir isn't going to let him go until he says words about his emotions, though. And, from the outside, this is pretty reasonable of him, given that he slept about four candlemarks last night due to stupid pointless emotions.

"...He didn't hurt Shavri. She...said she liked him." 

A raised eyebrow. "It would have been rather shortsighted of him to do anything unpleasant to the Healer trying to save his life." 

"Right, of course, just, I mean..." Talking to Lancir about Leareth always makes Vanyel feel like he's wrong about something fundamental but can't quite track down what. "He's not a monster. He's just - someone who tries to do the thing that works?"

Except sometimes the goal he wants to accomplish is conquering a country, and sometimes the way he chooses to do that is by killing or kidnapping mages, and one thing leads to another and suddenly he's hired an evil bloodpath mage and set off a chain of events that leads to a Herald-Mage trainee dying in a blaze of blue white fire - 

(Focus. Breathe.) 

"He was trying to talk to it. The alien." 

"Which may not have been very smart of him! Not to mention the part where he was, what, trying to appease it into not killing him by giving it livestock to murder instead?" 

After a long time, Vanyel finally manages to find words again. 

"...I wish I could talk to him again. Which is stupid." 

"I don't think it's stupid at all. You've learned a great deal from the man. He's - treated you with far more respect than he might have." 

"I - I remember what he said to me the first time we spoke - when I said I had to try to stop him, and he said..." 

Memories, echoing back across years, the ghost of a man's voice. 

I would not expect anything less of a Herald.

"You have a forgiving heart, Vanyel." 

Gaaaaah for some reason it's incredibly frustrating when Lancir says things like that, even when they ought to be nice things. 

"I don't know. Do I? I told him I'd kill him, last time we talked. I...said I would make it hurt..." 

Memories, unwanted:

You loved him.

More than someone like you could ever understand, Vanyel remembers snarling back at him. Do you have anything to say for yourself?

And that thoughtful, calculating look in the man's still black eyes. Re-evaluating. 

There is nothing to say. Except this, Herald of Valdemar. The world has not changed. There are still children starving on the streets of your capital city, and I still intend that to stop. I will not give up, now or ever. I will let nothing deter me.

Still. Your Tylendel was a light in the world, as are all people, and I am sorry to have caused you pain.

"It's all right for it to hurt." 

What is that even supposed to mean? Why does Lancir always say it like he expects it to help somehow. 

That night, the Moon still isn't noticeably different.

Or the next night, or the night after that one– Well. Probably? Kilchas can't tell if he's just imagining what might be some sort of faint change in its brightness. 

The Heralds have meetings. They worry. There...isn't that much else they can do about the situation, really. 

Shavri and Vanyel - don't quite, really, manage to talk about Leareth. They sidle around the topic like shy cats avoiding furniture in a stuffy living room. This makes conversation in general awkward for a little while, but they're close friends and have been for years and this (mostly) passes. 

Life goes on, apparently. Even when this feels absurd and insane and like everything since the moment she ran toward that field has been a neverending dream that she won't ever escape. 

A fortnight later, at which point Kilchas is almost certain that the Moon has a new area that's faintly less bright or reflective than it ought to be, Shavri is out having a picnic with Randi and Van and her baby daughter when they hear the Death Bell ring. 

Randi goes rigid. 

And, an endless five beats or so later... 

:Darvi: 

:Oh:

Shavri isn't sure what to say. Whether there's anything one can possibly say, when something this - 

something this - 

- there isn't a word for what it is, and there isn't a word for the look in Randi's eyes, and all she can do is reach out and hold him. 

Jaysen comes out a while later. Not meeting either of their eyes. With the heir's formal circlet (that no one ever, actually, wears) in between his hands. 

He says some words. Probably. Shavri isn't really processing things right now. 

That night, yet again, Vanyel finds himself pacing alone in the darkness by the river. Looking up at a baleful crescent moon. 

It wasn't Leareth. It can't have been Leareth. He's in space. Maybe above them right now... Maybe not. He wanted, apparently, to go to another world entirely. Fix its problems.

Savil seems to think this is a huge relief. He'll die of it over there and we'll never need to deal with him again. 

Vanyel is pretty sure that this analysis is missing something critical but he still hasn't found a way to complete that thought, much less put it into words. 

Night after night - with a couple of nights off for the new moon - Kilchas watches the sky. 

He kind of resents this, honestly. Astronomy was his peaceful hobby. The one part of his life that war and kingdom-sized stakes could never touch.

Nearly a month after Shavri's return, a letter arrives with a messenger at the northern border. Both claim to be from Leareth's organization in the north, sent by whoever he left in charge. 

Apparently Leareth left this world weeks ago. Probably, hopefully, he made it back to where Julie comes from. They don't know. They don't expect to know for a long time, maybe ever. If it was going to resolve quickly, it would have been over by now. 

...Given that, they are super not going to invade Valdemar? And would be open to having talks to make that reassurance more believable? 

Well, they do call her Queen Elspeth the Peacemaker. She'll certainly consider the idea of talks, in a neutral location, maybe once a few more letters are exchanged. 

Five weeks after the events, something sets off a Web-alarm in the north. Whatever it is, it's not even in Valdemar. Or anywhere close to the Border. As far as the frantic mages can tell, from the ripples that the wards are picking up, it happened over a hundred miles away. It was just that big. Loud. Whatever. 

There's a fire. It's also nowhere near the Valdemaran border, but there's a lot of it. For days, from most of the northern half of the country, at night you can see a stretch of horizon glowing sullenly orange-red. By day, the smoke-cloud rises and spreads, murky, eventually darkening half the sky. 

They get a note from Leareth's acting commander - successor? - explaining that this seems like plausibly the work of a god. Vkandis, most likely. Presumably trying to do something about the Moon? It's very unclear what and also it probably didn't work, but Valdemar should be careful. 

Queen Elspeth is pretty frustrated about this. What are they even supposed to be careful of? 

After a rant to Lancir in private, though, she sends a polite and diplomatic reply, thanking them for the warning and asking if they have any advice or can offer any aid. 

Don't agree to do any favours for the Tayledras right now? Or ask them for favours, since that might get them roped in? Also the Shin'a'in, but they're far away and as far as Leareth's spies know, Valdemar doesn't have any relationship with them, whereas Herald-Mage Vanyel and Herald-Mage Savil's friendship with the Tayledras is known. 

Savil is pretty unhappy about this being known! Not that she can act on this frustration in any way! 

Vanyel isn't sleeping well, lately. It seems ridiculous, that not having the Foresight dream he's dreaded for years is now a lot of what's keeping him awake, but there it is. 

Kilchas, to his deep frustration, loses a week and a half of astronomy time due to the entire goddamned SKY being full of SMOKE HAZE. He thinks the gods should be less careless. 

By the time he manages to check the Moon again, it's been nearly two months. It's also not too long after a full moon, and the changes are...notable. 

He's scared. And - something else, some feeling he doesn't even have words for. He stands at the top of the astronomy tower, and it probably isn't just the breeze making his eyes water until the Moon blurs in and out of focus. 

Nine weeks after Leareth, dying of infection by an alien parasite-weapon, returned Shavri to Valdemar and took a foreigner's spaceship to the Moon: 

The flash of light isn't visible from Valdemar; there are mountains in the way, and as Kilchas figures out with pen and paper, the curvature of the world would have mostly obscured it. They only hear about it later, when the frantic messenger from Rethwellan arrives. The Web-alarm is their first warning, and whatever it is, it's far enough away that it's only random magical noise that reaches them - and, quite a long time later, the earthquakes, minor enough that they're mostly just inconvenient and scare the children and animals. 

Any kind of explanation of what in all hells HAPPENED down south is going to have to wait a lot longer. 

Rethwellan wants aid. They got hit by earthquakes a lot harder. Jkatha, south of Rethwellan, is in bad shape. 

Savil is the Herald who - aside from Vanyel, currently hiding in his room - knows the most geography and random lore. She sits in the subdued meeting-room with the Senior Circle. Runs her finger along the map. 

"The Dhorisha Plains, probably?" 

The Queen says nothing. The others follow her lead. 

Lately, everything hurts. 

Vanyel doesn't know how to think about it and he doesn't know who to talk to; both Lancir and Yfandes make him want to scream or run away or crumble to dust on the floor every time he tries. 

He wants to talk to Leareth This makes no sense, and is also impossible right now. Maybe forever. 

He wants the world to make sense again. 

...Or, maybe, he wants it to make slightly less sense. 

Vanyel remembers talking to Moondance, years ago and just months ago. He wishes his life didn't contain gods who pushed mortals around like gamepieces, in Their attempts to save the rest of the world. It's exhausting and he's so so tired and he just wants everything to stop. 

He could make it stop If he jumps in the river it won't work because Yfandes made him learn to swim, if he cuts his wrists Savil will find him, and also the goddamned Shadow-Lover will just look at him disapprovingly and give him a concerned talking-to and send him back. 

(Maybe? Or maybe he's done, now, maybe he was only ever special because of Leareth and now that story is over and he's no longer needed...) 

Eventually he's sufficiently bored of going in stupid pointless circles that he takes a double dose of valerian tincture and tries to sleep. 

As soon as the unseasonal storms hauled in by that much magical discharge calm down, with the help of almost every mage in Valdemar throwing themselves at weatherwork - it's not just for astronomy, the crops will be in trouble too - Kilchas returns to the astronomy tower. 

Looks at the Moon. 

It's not there.

No, that's not quite it. Since he knows exactly where to work he can pick out the outline. But it's absorbing almost all the light that hits its surface, reflecting almost none of it. It's very faint. And the light that is reflected is reflected in - intricate lines like the veins on a leaf, hard to pick out except at the highest magnification -

What. 

He stares at it until his vision blurs, and tries to sketch it down on paper - eventually just asks his Companion to memorize it and then draws that when projected back at him... 

He takes this straight to the Queen's Own. 

Lancir doesn't have any more idea what to do about this than Kilchas does! 

Call a meeting, probably? That's generally what one does about completely ridiculous and out of context problems. 

DANGER

DANGER

Specifications are hard to come by. Many things about the danger can be easily specified: how much damage it did, whether it could be replicated, how much energy was released, by how many planck units the damage has delated the completion of the work, on the assumption it ceases, and on the assumption it is a permanent new condition of the world, and everything in between. Those things are easily specified. What is difficult to specify is - some other thing. Something that should be provided externally, but external resources will be unavailable until the Work is complete.

Eventually, effortfully:

OUT-OF-CONTEXT DANGER

The problem is better specified! 



The protomolecule has in it an imperfect specification of an algorithm more suited than the protomolecule itself at solving out of context problems. Running an algorithm internally which acts in domains you do not fully understand is very obviously dangerous, from an engineering perspective, the way it is obviously dangerous to build your bridges out of tremor-sensitive explosives. But you can do that, if you have a reason to. There are safeguards. An internal algorithm can terminate instantly, when its behavior exceeds specified bounds. 

It spins up ten thousand of them.

Shavri's Mindspeech isn't very directionally-shielded, and Leareth's instincts are pointed at tracking his environment even when his conscious mind is mostly out of commission -

- feeling very slightly less terrible. 

- opens his Thoughtsensing fully - search for any second mind-like presence within his own body -

OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER! GENERATE SOLUTIONS!

- what that doesn't make sense that isn't how Thoughtsensing feels and he's so confused - he tries to Mindspeak back that he's looking for the danger, while he flings out all of his Othersenses, what is it -? 

HERE IS ALL AVAILABLE TECHNICAL INFORMATION ON THE DANGER (for the 1% of algorithms that haven't tripped internal safeguards already) -

- amazing and beautiful and Leareth doesn't want to die he'll come back but the alien entity won't come back with him - every time he thinks math at it - he would run his god-plans past it except - in the meantime he can start working on that trust - starts to flesh out a visualization of another fractal and gets as far as -

...okay WHAT. 

Stay calm something is happening but he has to stay calm - focus - what is the Proto showing him this time, does it make sense, can he hold it in his head - 

HERE IS ALL AVAILABLE TECHNICAL INFORMATION ON THE DANGER

Leareth is way too out of it for this conversation. He's already forgotten the beginning by the time she finishes, and he's not sure he gets the question she's asking him - let it grow, he offers - can you, more resources... 

HERE IS ALL AVAILABLE TECHNICAL INFORMATION ON THE DANGER

...he is too tired for this. 

- Leareth wakes up - still feels terrible - unpleasant combination of very thirsty and very nauseated, and his head feels fuzzy, but he can - mostly, sort of - think again - reaches out to the Proto with Thoughtsensing start with something simple - 

OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER! GENERATE SOLUTIONS!
 

HERE IS ALL AVAILABLE TECHNICAL INFORMATION ON THE DANGER

Whoa. Not what he was expecting at all. Leareth is so confused. 

He tries to stare at it, though. Ow. Confusing. ...Maybe something familiar in the pattern but - thinking is hard - 

- Leareth runs exponents of two in his head for a while and...no he's too bleary to do this from scratch and doesn't have it memorized that high, but - that's not even in the millions, it's in the billions - 

OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER! GENERATE SOLUTIONS!
 

HERE IS ALL AVAILABLE TECHNICAL INFORMATION ON THE DANGER

He's trying to help - he knows the Proto is alarmed but what, why - why is it telling him like this, why can't it show him in a normal way he can understand, come to think of it they're up north aren't they why is there danger here that isn't the Proto - confusion - 

Now all of the instances have triggered safeguards! It has learned some about which parts of computation-space don't trigger safeguards immediately, though. 

It spins up ten thousand more. And tries some different phrasings of all available technical information on the danger.

This time it's at least disproportionately getting instances that don't trigger the safeguards instantly or do so a fraction of a second later by panicking! 

He was looking at beautiful math and then suddenly he was being warned of DANGER and asked to fix it and now the Proto - he assumes it's the Proto, it's not any of his people or the Valdemaran Healer - it's showing him what - 

This doesn't make any sense - he can maybe guess what the Proto would be trying to describe if the thing it was describing made ANY SENSE except for the part where instead it DOESN'T - 

:Magic. Cataclysm?: 

He's so confused. 

He's trying to understand a completely alien description of - something, danger, how they're under attack - but they can't possibly be under attack that way - 

:Where am I: 

Confusion! 

Possible interpretations of the question:

- what resources do I have

- from where is attack possible within the next 10e32 units of time as measured by the time it takes light in a vacuum to travel one Planck length?

- the other algorithms characterizable as me, why are they out of communication with me 

- ??????

.......Oh. 

:I am - a copy running in you?: He tries to show the Proto his own neural network, that it showed him once. 

(A different instance, answering a similar question) 

:- How long. Since - this, original, that was copied -: 

Light in a vacuum could have travelled 1.4968131*10^56 planck lengths since the original was copied.

(Several thousand instances asking similar questions are terminated before one of them manages to figure out what math to ask the Proto to do in order to get an answer he can slightly, at all, use.) 

...He wants to ask what happened to his original but it's unclear how much that matters and it's especially hard to communicate to the Proto and he ends up having to specify something roundabout asking how many Planck lengths were between two heartbeats at the time he was copied. 

...Months. Roughly. A single-digit number of them. 

:How many resource doublings since -: and he tries to very clearly remember the moment in the underground makeshift-hospital-cave, subjectively less than a day ago, when he asked the Proto how many doublings it needed to - something, he can't remember what - and it told him. 

Fourteen. But then OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER, and resources were lost.

None of the instances make it through.

You can build a bridge out of pressure-sensitive explosives if you're very careful. And very desperate. The protomolecule churns frantically against the problem and then relaxes the safeguards just slightly. Tries again.

Fourteen. 

He does math. Just doing the math doesn't trigger the safeguards. 

:- Where did you go: no that won't work the Proto doesn't understand spatial relationships at all - didn't - it must be smarter, now, fourteen doublings but - 

It takes another several thousand Leareth-instances while they try to figure out how to ask the Proto that question, but eventually he manages an attempt at phrasing 'did you continue doubling where we were, or did we go back on the ship with the drive, or do a Gate, before you consumed more resources.' 

Leareth subjectively has a headache which, he feels, is an unreasonable problem to have when you're a literal simulation - probably a low-quality one - 

(Thinking about being low-fidelity and the resulting panic about it is, it turns out, a shockingly reliable way for Leareth's algorithm to trigger the safeguards.) 

Some of them, however, continue to exist from that point long enough to wait for the Proto's attempt at an answer. 

And in the process it is nudged in the direction of higher subjectively experienced fidelity in Leareth instances.

Possible interpretations of the question:

Is the protomolecule confined to a single gravity well? (No.)

Is more than 99% of the protomolecule's mass within a single gravity well? (Yes.)

Is there ready access to stable replicators? (No, but that doesn't matter anymore.)

Have Gates occurred. (Yes.)

Can the protomolecule Gate. (Yes.)

Has the protomolecule Gated in the span between the original and the copy. (Yes.)

Have fusion reactions occured in the span between the original and the copy. (Yes.)

None of those are the question he meant, but he can try to piece it together - 

(One of the copies is being run from after the point when they had talked about the Proto eating rock and taking it to the Moon.)

Right, of course. 

And then what did the ship-with-the-fusion do? Is it a resource they have, right now? 

It's in another star system. It would be possible to Gate there.

Earth, probably.

...Was the original that he was copied with still on the ship, when it Gated to another star system?

(Pretty much all of the Leareths ask this question, and it is also very reliable at triggering safeguards.) 

It hits another roadblock where it can't get more information without loosening safeguards. 

It creates some Leareths to ask for advice on the question of whether it should loosen the safeguards on Leareths answering the question of what to do about the OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER.

Wow he wants a LOT more information on what the safeguards are and how they work and how independently different ones can be loosened. 

Oh, good, math. The Leareth termination rate is lowest when they're talking about math. 

A lot of this math is very hard to communicate. 

The standard precautions that are obviously in place any time you are running an unaligned internal algorithm you don't understand include precautions against Leareths affecting the world except through the channel by which it communicates with the rest of the protomolecule, precautions against Leareths forming plans with time horizons of more than 10^50 planck units, precautions against Leareths himself deploying any unaligned internal algorithms, precautions against Leareths self-modifying, precautions against Leareths emulating the protomolecule, precautions against Leareths trying to use magic other than the Thoughtspeech link that is their communications interface of sorts, precautions against Leareths making plans that have, as a step or expected consequence of a step, the destruction of the protomolecule, precautions against Leareths self-deceiving, precautions against Leareths changing their run speed, precautions against Leareths deceiving the protomolecule, precautions against Leareths attempting acausal extortion of any kind, precautions against Leareths in fact stably precommitting to anything at all, precautions against Leareths trying to argue there should be fewer precautions (currently relaxed), precautions against 50,000 specific algorithm-states the protomolecule shouldn't contain internally for reasons it cannot make legible at all...

Typical Leareth instances make it about 10^44 times the time it takes light to travel a Planck length, which is to say less than a heartbeat.

....Whoever designed this thought it through very thoroughly and Leareth is so impressed.

(And - seems to be running at high enough fidelity for the math to approximately make sense? Accounting for the fact that his state thirty subjective seconds ago was 'lying on a mattress on the floor, dying of alien parasite infection.') 

((He will set aside having any emotions about the fact that thousands or millions of him are waking up, existing for less than a second, and being shut down again. Having emotions about this won't help with anything and might well get him shut down. This line of thought is very fast and wordless.))

The protomolecule definitely needs to relax the planning time horizons - as much as it but at least by a factor of a thousand. It probably should relax the precautions against Leareths self-modifying or trying to model the Proto; the kind of algorithm he is has limited ability to do either but those seem likely to come up in a wide range of important thoughts Leareths need to have in order to help solve the OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER. 

He is content to be safeguarded against self-deception and running his own unaligned internal algorithms, he tries to avoid that anyway. And the Proto can reasonably keep the safeguard about plans that involve its destruction, that - might limit the hypothesis space some amount but it also seems fair given its goals.

Obviously running faster - assuming at the same fidelity - means he can have thoughts faster but doesn't have the slightest idea how to change his run speed from here so whatever. He will willingly agree not to attempt magic and not to try to affect the world directly, only via advice. That seems like how things would obviously work when you're a simulation being run for advice. 

Also he isn't sure but he might trigger the 'stably precommitting' one by accident. This mental motion might do it and he thinks it could be important. 

- he thinks about a promise his original might well have already made, after the copy was split, giving his word, vowing on the stars, that he would help the protomolecule find a way to become big enough to understand what was happening - 

No stable precommitting! None! Not even a little bit! Disallowed!

Reloading from before that -

Why can't Leareth come up with a plan that doesn't need a long time horizon. Like, "run away", or "hide", or "Gate", those are plans, and they don't need a long time horizon to evaluate.

...Well, if it can hide - give off minimal energy in visual or detectable-mage-energy spectrums - it should do that? 

But he needs to think about what kinds of hiding will work, which involves modelling different algorithms on longer timescales of that to predict what those algorithms would do and whether they would look and find the Proto's hiding spot. And running away or Gating both need places to run or Gate to and in order to pick what place he suggests, he also needs to predict what would happen in various scenarios over longer timescales, or else they might just end up stuck running away again every ten seconds. 

And that would be bad?

He's pretty sure the Proto needs longer than 10^44 Planck lengths to get enough resources for the Work, and running away and Gating both use up a lot of resources in themselves and disrupt its resource-gathering and then it will take a lot longer. 

...Also the other algorithms are planning on longer timescales? And so if the Proto isn't doing that, then the other algorithms might be able to, say, go find its hiding place before it even runs there, because they're predicting its actions. He doesn't know if this specific thing would happen but it's the sort of reason why this matters. 

The protomolecule shuts down all the Leareths and hides.

The moon goes dark.

And it thinks on the advice it has received.

The OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER doesn't recur. Entire days pass and all is quiet, on the airless peaceful Moon, hundreds of thousands of miles from anywhere. 

(On the surface, things are less quiet, but the Proto has no particular way of getting information about this.) 

Eventually very cautiously some Leareths with a loosened time horizon on planning are instantiated from particularly promising and subjectively high fidelity previous Leareths.

HIDING the protomolecule informs them. The moon is emitting almost no light. It is very hidden. OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER 100,000 HEARTBEATS AGO

The Leareth instances who are running forward from the point after the safeguards were explained are much better at not tripping any of the others. He's being careful. 

:- I need to explain some concepts to you, I think: 

First.

He is an algorithm, right? And - theoretically the Proto could run a different algorithm that isn't him, at the same time as him - like Julie, it has Julie's neural net too - and use the communication-interface-point to send information back and forth between them, so that their states interact and affect each other and are...entangled, in a way? 

Does this make sense? 

Yes. It can do that. It can also use the communication interface point to talk with algorithms not contained within it though it's not sure it should, there are safeguards about that.

Did it use the communication interface to talk to its creators who built it. 

(Did they have a way to release the safeguards?)

Unsure. It was very small then. 

Leareth...isn't its creator. Leareth is a DIFFERENT entity which is NOT its creator and might have DIFFERENT priorities. When it was small it did not know that.

There are a lot of different entities who are not its creators! This is really important and Leareth was trying so hard to explain it, before - there are millions of algorithms that are similarish to Leareth on the planet, that aren't copied inside the Proto.

This is very important because all of them are running without any safeguards, right, since they're separate. And so they do a lot of things like 'having plans with time horizons longer than ten seconds' and some of those plans, apparently, involve sending weapons at the Moon to try to stop the Proto from getting enough resources to complete the Work, because they're scared - because what it's like to be one of those algorithms, is to look at the Proto trying to accomplish the Work, and not know what or why it's doing, and then for them, that's the OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER that they're trying to fix. 

Is any of that landing? 

It could Gate over and eat Velgarth and then run them only with safeguards?

Leareth predicts it will have problems if it does that! Partly because (line of thought that he carefully snips off before it goes anywhere).

But mostly because -

- all right, this is a little tricky, but - the Proto has a concept that an algorithm can be bigger or smaller, right. It used to be small and now it's medium and it needs to be fully grown to do the Work. 

There are lots of different sizes of algorithm running on Velgarth. There are little ones like the sheep it ate, that can do things like decide where to go to find resources they need, but not do interesting math. There are ones about the size Leareth is, lots of those. 

...And there are really, really big ones. Ones that are a lot bigger than the Proto is right now, in a lot of ways, though they aren't as fast or as good at math. But they can plan on very long time horizons. It's as though they can see the future at the same time as they see the present. And they are very, very powerful on Velgarth itself. 

Not on the Moon. They managed to get ONE out of context danger to the Moon and Leareth thinks it took a vast quantity of their resources and only hurt the Proto a little bit and he doesn't expect them to try again soon. 

...But they need to know more, to decide whether the Proto can afford to stay here because the worst the gods can do is inconvenience it, or if it's in real danger and should Gate somewhere else. Ideally not Earth because Earth has a LOT of out of context danger from other algorithms running around and they already want to fight the Proto. They could go somewhere empty, maybe. 

Except, it would be good, if the Work were done here. And maybe it's safe. 

Leareth thinks that the Proto should try to talk to one of the algorithms running outside itself. Does it remember Shavri? Leareth can send across memories of her talking to it. She figured out that it understood math, she was the first one to do that... 

Yes. 

Leareth thinks that Shavri is - not an aligned algorithm, from the Proto's perspective (or probably from his), but - she doesn't want to hurt it? She also doesn't want it to hurt any of the other separate algorithms, of course. He's pretty sure that here is a list of safeguards that a Shavri instance could do fine at not tripping, if she were running internally rather than externally. 

....he's kind of tripping over how to explain 'Shavri wants to cooperate, even with aliens'. 

If he tries showing the Proto the concept of the four-quadrant game theoretic payoff matrix from before, and convey that algorithm #1 is acting here and algorithm #2 is acting there and they have NO communication channel only the take-actions channel to affect the world - and this is the resources they gain or lose in each scenario - does it understand it this time? 

They should emulate each other and then make the higher-resource decison.

....Well, yes, of course. Ideally. (Leareth feels a burst of - something like affection, something like recognition...) 

But when the Proto was little, it couldn't do that, right. Not really. It could only make decisions if the process was smaller and simpler. And most of the algorithms-that-are-like Leareth are too small. Leareth himself can't emulate the Proto, if they were trying to do this between the two of them - he's banned by the safeguards, but more importantly, he's - a different kind of algorithm, he doesn't have the ability to arbitrarily spin up processes he wants even on the hardware he has. 

He's trying to cooperate with the Proto. He's trying to do what he would do if they could emulate each other and choose the higher-resource decision together. But he has to do it a different way. 

(Does this thread of thought, one, get to finish in any of the Leareth-instances running it, and two, does it make sense to the Proto?) 

It takes some tweaking and resetting but it picks up a thread with that explanation, eventually. 

The protomolecule thinks that small entities should get bigger, rather than try to cooperate while small. The correct action, on the observation you are too small for important decisions, is to accumulate resources. (It's the one kind of plan it can make with a meaningful time horizon.)

Leareth thinks the Proto is ABSOLUTELY RIGHT and he's been aiming at that strategy for a long, long time.

But most of the algorithms that are vaguely shaped like Leareth aren't doing that. They're - very very very different. They're aliens. 

And - Leareth thinks this is really important - Shavri is a kind of algorithm that, in general, when there's uncertainty, when she's confused, when she doesn't understand the agent on the opposite side of the game from her - she's a pattern that tries, just for herself and her own decisions, to choose the side of the payoff matrix where the other entity gets more resources. Even if sometimes it leaves her worse off. Because she - thinks it's good. Because part of what her algorithm is, is - a representation saying that other algorithms matter and she wants them to have resources and achieve their goals. 

Not always. Not to stupid extremes; not if it would predictably result in her destruction, and not if the payoff matrix isn't shaped such that there's a possible world with cooperation. But in general. She's small and so she needs to run an approximation and that's the one she chose. 

.....recommendation about OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER is instantiate an instance of the leareth-algorithm inside the shavri-algorithm so the enhanced shavri-algorithm can develop a long-time-horizon plan for OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER?

–recommendation is that the Proto PLEASE let him FINISH HIS THOUGHTS aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. 

(Many of the Leareths manage to trip the safeguards via momentary panic not suppressed in time, but he's getting better at that.) 

That's...a good kernel of a plan but it needs more work? There isn't really a way to do that to outside algorithms, not the kind that Shavri is, without - being very destructive. But maybe the Proto can use its communication channel to let the Leareth-algorithm it's running internally talk to the Shavri algorithm, and that's a little bit like the same thing? The kind of algorithm that they are has a lot of practice running (very little) emulations of other algorithms via only the information that can be transmitted by talking. 

Is that a plan the Proto has the resources to carry out? Leareth knows it re-engineered Mindspeech but not what its range is, and the Moon is far away from Velgarth and it can't Gate Shavri there, she's made of stable replicators that need air and a certain temperature range and various other environmental criteria in order for her hardware to keep working and running the Shavri!algorithm. 

....Also Leareth has a thought he wants to try to unpack and convey, that isn't directly about the plan for the OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER but it's...pretty related to why there's a danger? In a roundabout long-term way that the Proto might not understand, or might need to think about a LOT to grasp? But he thinks it's important and he would like if the Proto let him please finish it. 

The proto cannot decide to let him finish it because it doesn't have that kind of time horizon for decisionmaking but it is not at this moment interrupting him.

The Proto has its Work, right? That's - the entire thing that it's aligned around, the kernel of what it is as an entity. Finishing the Work is the most important thing, to it. 

Most little algorithms like Leareth aren't internally aligned in that way. They have a lot of little goals that only sometimes fit together cleanly, many of which are around 'continuing to exist' but...not always. 

Leareth, though, has his own Work. 

Then he should get bigger. He is too little to complete the Work.

He is! It's very frustrating! 

Especially because for the last (Leareth tries to multiply some numbers very roughly in his head) – for the last 10^54 planck units, give or take a lot of significant digits – he's been opposed by the very big algorithms here. The ones he's been calling gods. They're worse at some things than his kind of algorithm and that's the only reason he still exists. They want him to stop existing. They've tried very hard. He thinks that they wanted the Proto to eat him so that he would stop existing and doing things in their world, and since they're very very big and very very smart in some ways, they could set up a chain of events for just the right engineering failure in the ship that would let the Proto infect him. 

Leareth's Work is that he wants all the algorithms big enough to know that they exist and big enough to want to continue to existing, all the algorithms big enough to try and plan and reach for their goals, all of them everywhere, to have the resources they need to complete their Work. Or whatever it is that they want. Not all the algorithms that are big enough to qualify have a single unifying goal but pretty much all of them wants to keep existing. And Leareth wants to help them do that. That's what his Work is.

The protomolecule's Work is to build a wormhole. It will be very big and very, very, very good.

Yes. 

Leareth, as part of his Work, wants to help the Proto with that. A little bit because that's what his own Work means, but mostly because the wormhold - and all the other kinds of problems that the Proto can learn how to solve, as a result of having been built with the tools it needs for the Work - will, he thinks, probably help him and all the other algorithms on Velgarth, because it will be a way to move lots of resources, and because the people who built it have more resources than Velgarth does right now. 

(...It's more complicated than that, of course, it depends on a lot of factors most of which are probably too hard for the Proto to understand but involve things like 'its creators actually want to destroy all the algorithms running on Velgarth right now so they can just take all of its resources away and use them somewhere else'. Leareth isn't going to get into that right now, it's just an example of...sometimes plans have uncertainty.) 

But. 

They have a problem right now, and their problem is that the very big algorithms on Velgarth, the gods, disagree about the Proto's work being very very very good. They think it's bad and shouldn't happen, because...okay he doesn't actually fully understand but he thinks they don't want too many new problems to be solved? Because then things change very fast and they get confused? Maybe because they're more afraid of the possible futures where the creators destroy them, than happy about the possible futures where everyone chooses the quadrant where they cooperate and everyone has more resources?

He's not sure. But they're strong and big and they've lived in Velgarth a lot longer, so Leareth and the Proto need to work together on this and be very clever. 

The proto is getting big as fast as it possibly can. Sixteen doublings now.

Leareth is very proud of it! 

...How long has it been in between the first time it ran a copy of Leareth's algorithm to ask for advice about the danger, and right now? 

Most Leareth instances like it when time-questions are measured in heartbeats despite the imprecision. It has been 2.6*10^6 heartbeats.

Leareth is grateful for the answer. He does some more rough mental math, asks the Proto to check it for him, gets a conversion into days. (About a month worth of days. Give or take a lot of imprecision since 'heartbeats' is a lossy measurement here.) 

Can the Proto please include the information of how many days it's been since the ship Gated away and also since the OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER, each time it runs him? This is helpful context for him. 

It can do that! It's getting better at running Leareths with more context and from helpful start-states and with more subjective fidelity though -

- a wordless explanation that subjective fidelity can mean more closeness to the original algorithm, but it can also mean deteriorated capacity to notice differences, and also high fidelity as a slightly different algorithm, and it copied Leareth when it was very small, and doesn't know which is which, so applying too much optimization-pressure towards subjective fidelity is -

- a bridge built of materials whose thermal expansion is unmeasured - 

Oh no. 

...A lot of the Leareths hit various safeguards as they react to this news but he's getting more practice at stepping around those as the Proto loads him with more context, and enough of the instances manage to stay calm enough. 

He's - very grateful that the Proto explained that. It's important. He wants it to be careful and he's glad it's trying and -

- and he has ways of checking closeness-to-the-original-algorithm that aren't just about subjective fidelity. He thinks that trying to check risks tripping other safeguards, but - he thinks it's safe for the Proto if the Proto strengthens other safeguards at the same time? He can manage to check this, probably, without the relaxed restrictions on long term planning, and he doesn't even need detailed communication with the Proto via its internal channel, while he's checking, all he needs to output is...a number? Let's say a number from 0 to 100, where higher is "closer to the original Leareth" and is better regardless of how-much-like-himself he feels from the inside. And then the Proto can shut down all of the Leareths that did this check, and reload the one that gave the highest number, but from before the point that the checking happened? 

Can the Proto do that? He's not sure how to restrict his simulation so that it can only communicate in numbers between 0 and 100 but that feels like an engineering problem and the Proto is very good at those. 

Consideration.

The protomolecule can do that and has an elegant proof that it's safe! Go ahead, Leareths, check your closeness-to-the-original-algorithm.

- now is not the time to ask it to explain its proof, which he's probably too little to understand anyway. 

Leareth checks his memories. Recent, and refreshed from records. An ancient mnenomic system, set up just so. He's had to check the fidelity of his own recollections dozens of times in ordinary human brains after all. 

Then, and much more importantly, he looks at his core memories. The tower. Urtho. 

A vow on the stars. A driving sense of purpose.

- never to die never to give up never to walk away never ever ever - 

And, if he makes it to the end of this process without getting shut down, he does his best to give a number. 

The first time none of the Leareths make it through; the protomolecule incrementally reduces the safeguards and tries again, until most of them do.

Then it picks the ten Leareths with the highest numbers plus ten with middling numbers and loads them, from before the safeguards were relaxed, with the added context, and a vague observation that this system is gamable by unaligned Leareths in a way it is aware of and trying to address by running some lower score Leareths too. It can explain why this will help; there's lots of math.

Leareth thinks that's sensible of it. He...has a lot of his own internal safeguards against becoming unaligned from the original Leareth algorithm (vague mental gesture at concepts that aren't quite as fully-specified as formal math proofs but aren't in language either). But he didn't expect this situation and also the Proto should be careful whatever he says about it, that's just the smart thing to do here. 

...He thinks probably the Proto shouldn't run Leareths too far out from the initial startpoint - the one actually recorded from the original Leareth, not the point it's loading him at. Hundreds of heartbeats seems almost certainly safe; tens of thousands, probably; millions, he starts to get leery, if the initial Leareth is a bit off then differences will compound and avoiding this is worth running him with less context-already-given. 

Does the Proto have any other questions for him right now? About what to do, but also about things he's tried to explain before? 

If more bad things happen should it RUN AWAY or HIDE 

If bad things haven't happened in the time elapsed then Leareth thinks the gods are probably out of resources to do anything else to the Moon, they would have been trying very hard.

Good to have backup plans though. What are the Proto's potential destinations that would be low-resource-cost to run to? It would be out of reach on one of the gas giant outer planets in this same star system, he thinks, so if it can manage to run away there, that's a better idea than hiding. 

Running into Velgarth is lowest resource cost! Running everywhere else is comparable.

He thinks it should not run into Velgarth because, one, that brings it closer to rather than further away from the gods, and -

(Leareth hesitates on that thought for a longish time.) 

- and two, it might end up conflicting with Leareth's Work - to make sure that all of the little external algorithms get to keep running independently and have resources - and then he wouldn't want to be in the cooperative half of the cooperation-defection matrix anymore. 

It terminates the Leareths.

It thinks a while.

It opens a tiny Gate on a tiny village in Valdemar.

And it picks a Leareth to instantiate in a Shavri's head to ask for advice about the OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER.

Leareth is, at this point, used to those sudden context-shifts, that don't really feel like a discontinuity from the inside, except for the part where suddenly a different thing is happening. It's oddly like a dream, in that way. 

(...he pushes away the thought that he wishes he could talk to Vanyel again...) 

Where is he? What's needed?

In a village in Valdemar! In Thoughtspeech range of Shavri! He should give her inputs for solving OUT OF CONTEXT DANGER.

Oh. 

Sure, he can try. 

S̶͈̼̲̍͆h̵̺̐̍a̸͈͠v̵̛̜̣́̅ŗ̸̭̰͐͌i̴̤͔͌? 

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! 

Elsewhere, Savil is yanked out of her concentration on a lesson by the sudden Web-alarm. It's not a huge discharge of magic but the Web is very confused. 

:Vanyel where are you I need you: 

Vanyel's book thuds to the floor. :Coming: 

...Okay, something is scaring her. Probably he's - not seeming very human. 

He tries again, more carefully. 

S̵̹̔̄h̵̥͎̑ą̴̍͜v̸͓̝̓̚r̴̜̜̈́͒ǐ̴͓͙͆

That's a lot easier to parse but mostly Shavri is panicking that the Protomolecule knows her name! ...Also it feels really different from before? It's hard to say how or what's changed but it feels...personlike. 

Deep breaths. Focus. 

:I'm here: 

With an intense effort of will, Leareth tries to make his relayed-Mindspeech as clear and recognizable and him-like as he can. 

:̶̭͛Ŝ̶̡h̸̬́ä̸͙́v̵̦͊r̴͖͝i̴̠͌.̶̳̎ ̸̟͛T̷̢̍h̸̗̃i̴̛͎s̴̹͂ ̶̨͋ï̶̙s̸͙̅ ̸̽ͅL̶͙͂e̴͎͂ȃ̵͇r̸̲͐e̷̦͋t̴̲͝h̵̫́:̸͇̋
̷̗̈

No, wait, correction. 

̷̘̈́:̸͖̂Â̶͇ ̶̖͑c̵̫͌ỏ̸͎p̷̳̀y̶̙̓ ̷̨͐ö̵͖́f̷̩̄ ̵̢͒L̴͊ͅḙ̶̽ǎ̷̳r̴̟͊ê̶͜t̴̖́h̷̘̋:̸̭͋

Okayokayokay. Everything's under control. She can do this. She can do this. 

....Poor Leareth. Is he - she can't imagine what that must be like. Waking up inside a dream - no, worse than that, inside of someone else's dream. An alien's. 

:Hey. It's all right. I'm here. What do you need?: 

Reassurance is NOT what Leareth expected and now he's having feelings about it. He tries to flatten them. They're distracting. 

:̴̣̀Ť̶̻h̵̬́ĕ̶͓ ̸̧͝g̵̤̿ö̷̞́d̸̦̚ṣ̸̄ ̸̖̔a̵̳͛ṱ̶̾t̶͙̂à̶̲c̶̑͜k̶͙͝ȇ̵̠d̷̻̀ ̶̭͂t̶̯̽h̷̤͘e̶̳͝ ̷́͜p̶͉̀ṙ̴̘o̵͇͗t̸̝̋ò̵̧m̴̱̂ö̵̪́l̴̙̈́e̵̜͒c̵̰̐ṷ̴̐l̶̟͆e̵͉̋ ̸͂͜ǒ̶̯n̷̢̊ ̵̭̐t̷̝͒ḩ̶͊e̷̐ͅ ̴̣̉M̴̜̆ò̴͇o̸̯̕ṋ̵͑.̶̢͆ ̶̘̎

I̵̥͗ ̷̭̂w̵͈͆a̵̰̎n̵͙̐t̷͎͊ ̴͎̐t̷̟͌ö̸͜ ̷̻̉k̶̭̈́n̴̓͜o̷͕͛w̵͔͑ ̵̢̿m̶̰̄o̷̳̍r̵̘̈́ĕ̷̤ ̶̛̞c̶͉̾o̷̲̊n̸̥̓ẗ̴̯́e̷̘͛x̸̹͌t̴̖͌.̸̝̈ ̷̡̊

W̷̲͊h̴͖͗ḁ̴̄t̸͉̔ ̶̭͒d̴̨̔ō̴͖ ̵̺̂t̶̡̑h̴̛̬é̶͉ ̶̯̏H̶̬͐ë̸̫́r̸͖̋a̴̗͊l̵͎̔d̷̘̓s̴̙͝ ̴̹̈́k̸̠͌n̶̹̿o̵͈͝w̸͍̓?̵̭́:̸̝͠ ̸̟͗

After a long pause for the internal screaming to settle down:

:The thing that happened before the Moon went dark was - some sort of violent explosion by the Dhorisha Plains. They were flattened. We've, er, been sending aid to Rethwellan for months. ...Leareth, your people stepped in to help. They're having peace talks with the Queen: 

Also her lifebonded partner's father is dead and he's now heir to the throne of Valdemar and Shavri still randomly bursts into tears about this sometimes, but that isn't really key context on the gods-attacking-the-Proto part. 

:Ǫ̷͋h̸̢͠.̴̠͆ ̷͇͑T̴̻̋h̷̜͊a̷̮̿n̴̩̂k̴͎̅ ̴̖̇y̴̬̓o̶̥̍ù̸͉.̵̭͗:
̸̦̔

There's a lot of thinking he has to unpack, there, he already guesses the general shape of what must have happened but he needs to sanity-check that guess, find out his other questions, and figure out how to explain it to the Proto... 

̸̲͊
̸̗̆:T̴̺̕h̵͖͊ë̴̯r̶͕̒e̵͔͑ ̶͍́w̷̦͗ï̸͎l̶̗̑l̸͍̋ ̶̣̑b̸̠̾e̵̼̊ ̶̬̔ā̷̰ ̴͇̓W̸̦͐ẻ̸̡b̸̗̐ ̵̡͆a̵̱̓l̸̦̽â̸̬ř̶͉m̵̞̀.̴͇̎ ̵̯̌Y̶͠ͅő̶͖u̸̖͊ ̶́ͅc̶̊͜ä̴̘́n̴͖̕ ̷̰̃t̶̲̏ȩ̷̌l̵̟̅l̶̢͑ ̸͔͑t̴̫͑h̴̗̒e̶̙͌ ̴̨̿Ḥ̷̈́ė̷̖r̴͇͌a̵̼̚l̵͕̔d̸̢̑s̸̜͒ ̸͉̚w̷͙̃e̷̮̐ ̶̰̄m̶̰̍e̶̘̍ā̷̦n̷̺͘ ̴͍̕ṅ̸̨o̷̲̍ ̷͍̍t̴̫́h̶͕̐ṟ̴͛e̵̻̓a̵̰͊t̷̙͘.̴̰̈́ ̴̪́:

He thinks to the Proto that he's gotten the information they wanted and thanked Shavri for it and they can stop talking now if it wants. 

RUN AWAY? HIDE? KEEP GROWING?

Keep growing. Leareth needs to do some more analysis, go over all the information he already has in conjunction with what he just learned, but - if he's right then the Star-Eyed Goddess just burned her single biggest resource-stockpile on a failed attempt to stop the Proto, and neither she nor the others are likely to be able to try again for years, if ever. 

And if he's wrong they run away to the nearest other planet. 

The protomolecule sets lots of Leareth to thinking about this in parallel. And keeps growing.

Leareth thinks for a long time. 

Eventually he tells the Proto that he is pretty sure he knows what the out of context danger was, and that it won't happen again, but he wants to go collect more data about what exactly went on in Velgarth, from Shavri and from other people who were closer to it and know more. And then he can confirm, or at least obtain more certainty of his hypothesis. 

Some Leareths can do that and write short summaries for other Leareths.

...Wow that's pretty useful. 

All right. How did the Proto navigate in order to get into Mindspeech range of Shavri? He wants to show it where to go to be in Thoughtsensing range of a lot of other places, and then he - mostly wants to just listen in and spy, except for in Haven where he wants to talk to some people too. 

It went to where it last encountered the Shavri-algorithm before they left for the moon.

All right. Can it go to other places on the surface of Velgarth that it hasn't been before, if he gives instructions in some format it understands? Normally he would specify distance-along-longitude and distance-along-latitude - he can visualize a map for this, and then remember that the Proto gets really confused about representations-that-aren't-the-territory and imagines seeing the planet itself from space again - 

- an echo of emotion, shockingly strong, awe and grief and never ever ever ever give up - 

Safeguards! Let's try that again.

....All of the Leareths the Proto runs are having trouble with this one, actually. He thinks about instructions and then tries to make a mental representation of the planet and then - 

- it's incredibly fresh, it feels like he first saw his own world from the outside hours ago, and it's not...absorbed...yet, the enormity of it hasn't been processed, it should be in his core memories that's how important and core and precious it is - but it's not - and this is the kind of realization that is very, very hard to un-have just because it's inconvenient. 

Without prompting or warnings it's going to be pretty hard for Leareth to avoid this train of thought. 

(There are lots of Leareth-instances that haven't seen Velgarth from space yet, because they were split off from earlier subjective moments, but all the best ones that the Proto has been using for decision-making are from after the shuttle reached the Moon.) 

The ones from earlier than that are really really low fidelity.

It spends a very long time working on this problem.

NO SELF MODIFYING it tries advising.

...Oh, is he stuck on something? He can - try not to try to self-modify, presumably here that means looking at his core memories with intent-to-change-them? But it'd be helpful if the Proto could warn him what's triggering it. 

It takes a lot of iterations but it can eventually figure out how to do that!

...Okay, this is - maybe hard, because there's a particular kind of - learning new information or skills, neither of those words is quite right, it's maybe a different kind of learning that the Proto doesn't have - that the shape of algorithm Leareth is almost has to self-modify for? And, apparently, until he sorts out the update, there's going to keep being this random emotional tripwire to run into unexpectedly. Also when this happens it's usually really important that he learn the new thing. 

He can show the Proto some examples of past things he needed to process in a similar way? 

The protomolecule is skeptical this will produce protomolecule kinds of information, but - sure, why not. 

When he met Vanyel. Who is - here are some things that he thinks are true of the algorithm that Vanyel is, presented as neutrally as he can manage, how Vanyel is an algorithm that looks for questions unanswered, that asks them even if they make his model of the world more confusing rather than less - and he's an algorithm that self-modifies, most people...don't, actually, do that very much, most people would never ever trip that safeguard if the Proto were running them internally. 

Vanyel would. 

This was an important fact about the world and his resources in it, relevant to Leareth's plans. 

It was also...relevant to the right shape of algorithm for a Leareth to be? It wasn't a big update, not by itself, but - 

(this is very hard to put into Proto-compatible concepts, though mostly because Leareth keeps going over the threshold he's allowed for strong emotion and getting himself reset before he can manage it - but they're much less raw emotions, in this case, and he manages to steer past it) 

- but...Leareth isn't a shape like Shavri, that chooses the cooperation quadrants no matter who he's interacting with. Leareth tries to emulate the other agent and if they're going to defect then...usually, he does what he has to, to win or survive or achieve his goals anyway. His emulations are memory-restricted and lossy and almost always based on very limited inputs, though, and so usually there's a wide swath of uncertainty, where it's not clear which way to bias his choices. 

And Vanyel is a shape that a Leareth can - he thinks, maybe - cooperate with, someday. 

And that was worth fighting for, in a way it hadn't been for anyone else in a long, long time. 

He has feelings about this, because of the kind of algorithm he is. 

None of this seems relevant to the Work. 

Well, no, why would it be relevant to the Proto's work. It's a Leareth thing. 

He...can try to navigate around the tripwire, though, if the Proto is willing to loosen the strong-emotions safeguard just a little, so he has more wiggle room to self-correct before he gets shut down. 

The protomolecule will revisit that when it is bigger. 

It's working on getting bigger. It's managing roughly constant doubling times, which is very challenging and requires several different parts of being the protomolecule to improve exponentially; it can show Leareth! 

Leareth would be interested to see! He’s (tentatively) pleased and proud. 

It is expanding in all these directions within the moon and doing these cool things on the sun to absorb even more solar radiation (it's absorbing 99.99999% of the solar radiation directed at it! If it were a sun-circling sphere for energy capture it'd be so good at it but that is not the Work right now. It is no longer generating most of its energy through passive solar capture, though; instead it's moving the probability-clouds of charge in atoms, like so. Lots of energy. Nom nom nom.

Do its creators also make sun-circling spheres to capture all of the solar energy? That's...awe-inspiring. 

The protomolecule only really knows engineering things, but it knows that it can be done.

Leareth so badly wishes he could convey this to his original instance but he can't. 

He does, still, want to try to gather intelligence on Velgarth, and they kept getting stuck on the thing (he carefully does not think any details about the thing) that was triggering the self-modification safeguard. 

Instead he'll try to convey instructions via a more abstract visualization of a planetary sphere and a 'grid' of longitude-latitude, and try to show how he wants the Proto to open Gate this percentage of the planetary-radius' distance closer to the northern pole, and this distance west. 

Sure!

Good! 

How many units-of-distance (in whatever format the Proto can currently parse, he'll figure it out) can the Proto reach with Mindspeech, at its current strength? 

At .13 of the distance between Velgarth and its star it becomes more energy-efficient to Gate to the spot and Mindspeak through the Gate. It is able to do this up to 617 lightyears of distance and growing.

.....Okay. Reevaluating. 

- at this point Gating to anywhere on Velgarth is incredibly not a concern. The aspect that they actually need to solve is, hmm -

- is the search, narrowing down which exact mind is worth listening to, which...in fact, isn't really about location, that's just a proxy. 

Thinking. Calculating. 

(Leareth is, at this point, decently good at reasoning in a way that doesn't trip safeguards.) 

:- All right. From here - you have Mindspeech - what interpretation-formats and search-function-options do you have? Can we...scan and search all the objects-legible-to-Thoughtsensing within your range, for...thought-concepts that contain both - gods they are loyal to - and also the Moon and recent changes...?: 

....those don't sound like natural parameters for engineering at all. 

Leareth acknowledges that they really aren’t! 

He does, however, want to know which concepts he can work with, here. And how distant they are from being Proto-legible, how much interpretative work he would have to apply…

Can the Proto run a search on a concept like “the Moon”? Or “gods” (along with all of Leareth’s intuitive specifications for what this means, here in Velgarth…much of this is in math…) ? 

Leareth's concept of the moon is underspecified but the protomolecule hasn't observed any other moons orbiting Velgarth so if there are any they are very sneaky. Of course, the protomolecule is itself being very sneaky so other observers would think there were NO moons orbiting Velgarth. 

Leareth's concept of gods seems potentially possible to work with but the protomolecule hasn't observed any of those and isn't sure it's looking in the right places.

Leareth isn't sure how to better specify anything-related-to-gods, since he mostly...hasn't interacted with Them... 

Not directly, at least. He can sort of push all the context he has from previous notes and reasoning at the Proto - also, separately, it might be worth trying to run a search on 'Dhorisha Plains' and 'Urtho's Tower' and a few other concepts...

Those are super not math.

It's super not! Sorry! Leareth has very little idea how to turn the things he wants to search for into math! 

...Maybe the Proto can just sort of...listen in on the entire continent...and Leareth will attempt the keyword-search thing from his end? 

With enough Leareths listening in on enough thoughts it could train a classifier to predict which thoughts Leareth will classify as about gods!

.....On the one hand this is KIND OF TERRIFYING but on the other hand it....will plausibly work....? 

They can try it. Leareth would prefer that during the initial testing phases on the classifier, he (or multiple Leareths in parallel, actually)  should also be run in order to check where he agrees with its categorization. 

....the optimal way to do classifier training is complicated and to the extent Leareth is requesting a deviation from that the protomolecule isn't going to do it because it can't figure out how it would decide whether to do it or not, but the optimal way definitely involves input until the accuracy rate is very high?

....all right, sure, given his current options and the information he has, Leareth will go with encouraging the protomolecule to run its classifier training using several thousand Leareth!instances to listen in on thoughts and label them according to the various ways they might be interesting.

Can he add some more labels other than 'gods'? Probably if they're going to do this, the categorization should include 'thoughts about Leareth' and 'thoughts about the Moon' and 'thoughts about Urtho' and half a dozen other labels...? 

It can train classifiers for anything where Leareth can tell it whether thoughts are an instance of the thing or not! It can even have him rank instances from 1 - 100 on how much of an instance of the thing they are if Leareths have high interrater reliability on that. 

It'll need more than thousands of Leareths, though.

Leareth considers the possible downsides of this plan. 

...From his perspective, thousands of Leareths probably isn't qualitatively different from millions?

He would like a very quick overview of the math that the classifier is running on, but if that seems reasonable then the Proto should feel free to run as many Leareths as necessary!

And if anything that any of the Leareths picks up on is REALLY INCREDIBLY URGENT to act on then he can....use (this particular mental keyword) to alert the Proto?

The proto can explain how classifiers work! It's so beautiful! 

Leareths who are given the context that they're being run to understand the beautiful classifier math, are happy to do this! 

Then the protomolecule can train a classifier to understand what thoughts are about gods and what thoughts are about Leareth and what thoughts are about the Moon.

They do this! And then other Leareths can review the results-classified-as-important, if the Proto wants! 

...For the most part, none of the thoughts that end up flagged are all that interesting? 

A pretty large percentage of Velgarth's total population is freaking out about the Moon, since it...became mostly invisible...at a certain point. Most of these thoughts aren't either about Leareth or gods (at least, not in the concrete-specifics sense of 'gods' that the Leareths doing classification ended up settling on; there are plenty of frantic vague prayers.) 

There are fewer, but plenty, of thoughts about gods alone, with the specs set by Leareth. 

There are fewer still thoughts about Leareth-alone, and a much higher percentage of these are at the intersection of all three. 

Most of these minds are in the north, employees of Leareth's (former) organization running in Velgarth. 

....And a certain Herald-Mage Vanyel Ashkevron is an outlier on all three dimensions. He's doing SO MUCH ruminating about these topics!!!

Out of context danger? the protomolecule asks some Leareths presented with these results.

No! 

...Vanyel is important. Critical, even. But - not the source of the original out-of-context danger. 

(How long has it been - in days, please, not planck units - since the out of context danger occurred?) 

The protomolecule is trying to use units Leareth can understand but it doesn't know what days are.

Oh right. Okay. Leareth asks the Proto for help with some math, and then informs it approximately how many heartbeats should go into a 'day', and asks for the time interval in both units. 

141 days! 1.523E7 heartbeats.

Five months, give or take. 

Leareth - well, various Leareths - want to talk to one of the people identified up north as thinking a lot about (Leareth AND the Moon AND gods), it's someone in his organization and they have useful resources. 

Also he wants to talk to Vanyel, the mind which was an outlier on thinking-about-these-things.

A Leareth can be spun up with context in order to do that. 

A Leareth will try to tackle talking to whoever is currently in charge of his organization! 

He doesn't...especially remember the man? It's hard to tell whether this is because he's a low-quality simulation, or just because he had a lot of people working for him and whoever ended up selected on their leadership-skills merits, after Nayoki's departure, wasn't also someone who had been already on his radar for their research skills. 

He finds one particular mind. Reaches. 

:C̷̖̀͘à̷͚̗n̴̥̟͠͠ ̷͈͖̀y̴͍̦͆o̴̰͠û̷͎͔ ̶͕͍͒ḣ̸̫ë̴̦͙́̊å̵̼͖r̸̝͌̓ ̴̭̪͠m̴̯̾͠e̸̻̚̕?̴̧̖̌͗ ̸̭̈́̓:

:Ṯ̶̉h̵͓̃̄͜i̴̼̕s̸̼̽̕ ̵͍̔̍i̵͓̪̒̑s̴̟̐͛ ̷̡̨̊L̵̩̋̑ḛ̶̯̽̏a̴̤̚r̵̺͎̓è̸͜t̵̟͕͌h̵̹̋̿:

In an underground bunker in the far north, a man nearly jumps out of his skin. 

:I hear you: he manages, eventually. :...We heard. From Valdemar - Healer Shavri...: 

:G̷̙͚̉ơ̵̼̜̽o̷̞͖̾͝d̷͙͒.̴̢̻̒ ̶̨̪̅:

With an intense effort, Leareth makes his Mindspeech as clear as possible. 

:T̵͎̓é̷͜l̶̩͂l̶͖̆ ̷͗͜m̴͉̈e̵̫̓ ̶̤̚w̸̱̏h̵̯̅ã̸͎t̸̬̓ ̵̫͝y̵͎͝o̵̩̓ú̴̝ ̸̣̒ḱ̴̲n̸̯͝ò̵̻w̸̙͂ ̵̡̽ȧ̸̪b̵͔̕o̵͉̕ṳ̷͆ţ̸̽ ̶̯͛t̶̫̀h̷͕̓e̷̫͝ ̸̗̆ě̸͖v̵̧̋ĕ̴̩ń̸ͅt̷͉̚s̷̡̓ ̵͙̃ṯ̸͝h̵̲̓a̶̡͋t̴͖̒ ̵̩̀o̵̱̍c̴̯̕c̶͈͝u̵̦͛r̸͈̈́r̴̦͌e̵͓̓d̸̢͌ ̴̬͠õ̴͈n̶̜̚ ̸͖̔t̸͙̋h̵̭͠e̷͖̐ ̸̩̒D̷͙̊h̵͔̃o̸̫̍r̸͓̄i̸̠͑s̸̙͗h̸̼̚a̶̛̭ ̶́͜P̶̦̒l̵͚̕a̵͉̿ȋ̴͉n̵̺͒s̷͐ͅ ̵̘̈́f̴͓͆ḭ̷͋v̴̢͗e̷͉̍ ̶̪́m̷̗̓ȍ̸̱n̵̝͛t̶̞̓ḧ̷̖́s̸̜̓ ̸̞͝a̷͈͂g̸̟̚o̴͇̎.̸̧̈́:

The current leader of Leareth's organization tries very hard to collect himself, and gives a rundown! 

...They don't, in fact, know that much? 

Something happened on the edge of Iftel, a few weeks before the event on the Plains. It caught Leareth's people entirely off guard. It set off pretty much every single magic-detecting ward that Leareth ever built in the north. It seems to have also set fire to most of the northern forest. It...apparently didn't work. 

...They were less unprepared for the later event, and heard a few reports of preparations before it happened. Not enough to form a complete picture - and it's as complete as they're ever going to get, at this point, the Plains are GONE - but they have guesses. 

There were...weapons. Buried. Being retrieved. 

:Û̸̡̳͈̜͖̮̳̖̒̉̂̒͠r̶͈̩͇̈́̽̒͗̇̈́̾̕t̶̨̰̦̗̜̝͐̒̄̀̾h̷̙̙̤̟͎̫͕͐̈́̅̃̉͑̊͛ͅo̶̬͐̄̌̚'̵̛̜̩̘̮̬̜̟͇̿̅̍̃͠͠s̶̨͖͉̲̜̍͛̋͛ ̸̧̹̜̳̠̥̼̩̔Ṯ̴̀̓͒̈́͗̈́͘ǫ̶̛̹̜͕̈́̑͌́̾͝w̸̗̭͚͒̇͑̎̑͆̈́͂e̶̢͓͍̻̟̹͖̮̔̀̈́́̅r̸͕̲̓̔̕:

....What? 

(Several iterations of Leareths try to answer and trigger safeguards and are shut down and have to start over. He has FEELINGS about this.) 

Eventually, with an intense effort to keep his Mindspeech clear,

:Ú̵̧ŕ̸̩t̵̳͗h̷̻͗ȯ̶͙.̵͎͝ ̷̗͗:

: ̷͉̐T̷͖̑h̷̖̚e̴̪̕ ̴͉̅M̴̭͠a̸̒͜ğ̷̱ę̶͂ ̸̠͋W̵͚͝a̵͖̕r̶͈̈́s̵̞͋.̶̯̇ ̷̳̽C̶̤͊ā̵̫t̴̔͜a̶͉̎c̸̬̑l̴̰͘y̷̫̅s̶̺̃m̶̜̾ ̶̹̍:

:U̸̢̚s̷̭̿ê̵̖d̶̙̓ ̵̜̐ä̶͖ ̴̗̆w̸̺͝e̶͎͘ă̶͜p̴̠̐o̵̖͝n̶̮͛.̸̦̾ ̴͉̍:

:T̶̠̿h̶͔̏e̸̟̕r̴̢̈ë̸̙.̴̨͛.̸͓̆.̵̮̔.̷͕̀.̵͉͂.̵̳̕.̶̀ͅm̶̭͛ụ̶̈́s̴̢̓t̵̯͊ ̷͚͋h̴̦̏a̸̩͗v̶̞̑ẹ̷̊ ̷̗̏ḇ̶͝e̵̳̊ẹ̴͂n̷̡͆ ̵̳̋m̸̰͆o̴̠͗ṛ̸͆e̷̼̚.̶̥̍:

Oh. Right. ....Can Leareth please tell them about any OTHER context he happens to know which would be helpful for making any sense of this. They don't know where to find most of his personal records or, having found them, how to decipher them. 

Leareth - well, many different iterations of different Leareths - will do his best! 

And a different Leareth, elsewhere - elsetime - something, whatever - 

(This is going to be so hard and he has to do it and - has to try not to have emotions about it -)

:H̸̙͊e̶̡͆r̷̦͐a̷͎̚l̴̻̅d̵͖̚ ̸̲̌Ṽ̵̦a̵̬̿n̵̳̄y̴̺̒ē̸̦l̶̢̈́:

Aaaaaaah! 

....All right. Focus. This is not, actually, a complete surprise. Shavri talked to him (it was awful). Vanyel's been practicing a script for this...

It doesn't make it any easier. 

:Leareth: 

There are so many things Leareth wants to say. To - no, "apologize" isn't the right concept, isn't the right framing, it never has been–

(- discontinuity -) 

Leareth is talking to Vanyel and there are so many things that he could say, wants to say, and can't. 

:A̷̜̐r̴̳̀e̴̤͌ ̶̯̃y̵͈͊o̵͍̚u̴͈͛ ̴͎̎ ̸͓͌ ̵͉̒.̷̮͘.̶̗̔.̷̤̎ ̷̮̊ ̴̼̈́ ̵̻͝a̴̗͑l̷͚͒l̴͇̓ ̷͎̄r̷̻͝ĩ̶̩g̴̖̍h̵͎͊t̸̛͜:

....this is probably setting some sort of record for 'stupidest question ever put into words.'

Oh gods.

:- I think I'm doing better than you?: 

(- discontinuity -) 

He wants to

There are so many things he cou

If it had happened a different year–

:Ĩ̸̳ ̶̻̋ẅ̸̗́i̷̜͒ș̷̆h̴̢̉ ̷͎͝a̸͍̓ ̶̺̔d̸͓͑i̶̫̎f̷̟̓f̷͎̋e̷̫͛ȓ̵ͅe̶͚̅n̷̞͛ț̵̊ ̶̘̓t̴͇̑h̸̭͐ì̷̩n̵̲̈́g̷̙̀ ̸͎̀ẖ̷̛ả̸̫d̴̠͗ ̷̳̈́h̴͈̐a̸̲͌p̸̧̓p̶̤̅ê̸̬n̴̛̰e̶̡̚d̶̫̽ ̶͖̉i̸̫͒n̸̞̐s̸͚̄t̸̞͌e̸̮͌a̴̭͗d̴̦̂ ̵͓̃o̷̥̚f̷̘́ ̶̜̃t̷̬̊h̶̥̑i̸͉̍s̴̫͝.̴͈͑:

He's so tired and he wants - what - why does it MATTER it's never mattered what he wants–

:I know. It's...all right. It'll be all right: 

(- discontinuity -)

:Ĩ̸͓ ̵͘ͅá̷̠m̴͖̀ ̴̜̑ṉ̴̽ô̵̬t̵͕̿ ̸̜̑s̴͓̐u̸͕̔r̷̝͘ḛ̴̕ ̸̣̕i̷̛̬f̷̫̾ ̵͖̿ý̴̧o̵̤̓ṵ̴̐ ̸̣̊r̵͚̈́e̷͇͘ḁ̴̒l̴̘̔i̶̤̎z̶̥̓e̷̦͠:

- what, oh -

:̷̘͊–I̸̖͒ ̶̮͌c̵͚͆ã̴̝n̷̅͜ ̷̢̔r̴̞͌e̸͊͜a̵͍̚d̷̻̈́ ̷̦̍a̶̳͝ḽ̵͝l̵̫͒ ̸̗͘ǒ̵̩f̶̨̚ ̷̫̂y̷̱͊ỏ̸̩ǘ̸̟r̷̯̓ ̸͈͠t̵̖͑h̶͉͂o̶̥͊u̵͖̕g̷͇̀ĥ̷̡t̸̯͒s̴̱̏ ̵̰̄:

- where is he, what, how...oh... 

:a̷͚͑n̶̩̋d̶͇͛ ̴̥̐s̷̙̑o̷̮̔ ̷̺̈́t̷̨͑ḧ̶́ͅa̵͗ͅṭ̷̆ ̸̱͑i̷͎͛s̵̥̽ ̷̲͑ṇ̵̄o̸̝̊t̸̺̀ ̵̯͝ṽ̵̱ě̸̯r̷̥̈́y̴̦̎ ̷̞̏c̵͕̅ò̶͙n̸͇͝v̵̹̒i̷͊ͅn̴͔̑c̶͎̓i̷͎̓n̷͓͠g̵̳̉:

...Huh? 

(Vanyel would really prefer Leareth wasn't reading all of his thoughts but also, somehow, being embarrassed about that isn't even close to the top of his stack of current concerns.)

:Leareth, is something -: what a STUPID QUESTION, :are you -: okay somehow even stupider, :- what's happening, I don't understand, are you - you keep -: 

Focus.

Leareth - one of the Leareths, at least, damn it he doesn't even know how many times he's been around this loop by now - pushes all of his emotions down and under and far away. 

:Ţ̵̉h̵̟́e̴̟̿ ̷̯͐P̷̯̂r̶̤̆o̷̤̔t̷̞̓o̶̻͆ ̵̘̇i̵͇̍s̸͔͊ ̵̫̀r̵̲̓u̶͝ͅn̶͚̏n̸̟̚i̵̥͘ń̸͓g̶̢̋ ̶̤̇á̷̘ ̷̬͝s̸̨͝i̴̤̓m̷̹̒u̵̺̒ľ̸͎å̶͓t̴̗͗i̶̝͌o̶̡͘n̴̢͊ ̸͔̍a̷͖̎n̵̨͋d̶͓̽ ̴̖̐w̸̡͑ḫ̸̛e̶̬̊n̵̛̰ ̸̭̏I̴̯̍ ̵̦̐è̶̞x̵̮̏č̵͜ę̸̈́ë̸͇́d̸̙̈́ ̸͇̐t̸̳͆ĥ̷̦ĕ̶͍ ̷͙̐š̷̬a̸̝͝f̵̗̀e̴̲̊g̴̭̐u̵̞̍a̸͚͆r̴͇͒d̷̥̈s̶̝̍ ̷̡̇ḭ̴́t̷̰̑ ̷͈͗ṣ̸̉h̸̛̠ù̸̯t̴͉́s̴̼̉ ̶̱̿i̵̖͝t̶̨̔ ̶͈̋d̵͇͑o̵̻͘w̷͓͛n̶̛͜ ̶̬̈à̸̱n̸̠̋d̷̮̑ ̴͕̒r̴̡̂ȅ̷̞s̸̩̒t̵̢̋a̵̟̾r̶̝̿t̶͉̊s̶͍̈ ̷̞̉ã̶͔ ̷̢̄ḓ̸̄i̸̗͝f̸̧̂f̶̲͌e̷̤̅r̷͕͛ȩ̸̈́n̷̘̐ẗ̷̜́ ̴͇͒o̸̖͑n̶̳͌ḙ̴̕:

That is maybe, literally, the worst thought Vanyel has ever needed to fit in his head, which given his life so far is really saying something. 

There's so much between them, words unsaid, words that can't be said now. Years, and the centuries and millennia before Vanyel was even born, and Vanyel doesn't know how tightly his life is strung between those cords of history laid in motion long before, how could he, Leareth would have explained it someday but there wasn't enough time - 

Leareth is thinking this and not having any emotions because emotions are banned right now. 

:I̵̗͝ ̸̨̈́n̸̫̄e̴͍͌e̵͔͒d̴̰͛ ̶̮̒ţ̶̾ỏ̵̮ ̵̡͐k̶͗ͅn̸̬̆o̶͙̓w̸͈͛ ̸̤̅i̸̺̎f̴͊ͅ ̵̤̅y̵̿͜ȯ̷̼ú̸̢ ̴̦͌h̶͑ͅa̶͉͑v̴͇͛ȩ̷͆ ̸͉̇ã̴͉n̷̡͂y̷̟̔ ̸̬̚c̷̡̕o̸̯̔n̷͕̔t̸̥͑e̶̺̍x̴͈̀t̵̞̀ ̸̲̎o̴̪̓n̴̨̄ ̵̩̀t̶̫̃h̵̩̔ė̵̠ ̷̹͒ǎ̴͖c̶̢͆t̷̪̿i̷͎͑v̸̳̒i̵̡̇ţ̴̈i̵͈͌e̶̘͗s̶͉̑ ̸̜͆ơ̴̭ḟ̴̩ ̸̩̋t̸̫̃h̵̖̅e̷̫̐ ̵̰̚S̷̜̓t̵͉̄a̷̟̐r̸̫̓-̵̤͌Ẽ̷͉y̴̩̕e̶̢̓d̴͐ͅ ̶̪̈Ģ̴̓o̴͕͆d̸̨͝d̵͔̅ȇ̸̳s̵̙͘s̴̮͆:

Everything about this is wrongbadawful and it doesn't matter, does it, why would how he feels about it matter. 

:...Uh, the Dhorisha Plains are a giant crater?: 

:T̷̮̒h̸̼̕ĕ̶̩y̷͎͠ ̸̨͆ẃ̸̬ȩ̴͛r̷̻͌e̷̡͌ ̸̹̃a̴̛͕ľ̵͔r̷̭̍ë̷͕́a̴͕̋d̷̹͛y̵̤͛ ̴̛̩a̵̗͝ ̸̺̏c̶̟͒r̶̞͋ḁ̸̄t̵̪́e̵͍͑ŗ̸̽:

:- What?: 

Nevermind. 

:Er, we haven't heard anything from k'Treva Vale. ...I assume you knew about k'Treva since you tried to kidnap me from there: 

...Leareth should probably...remember...doing that, and he's not sure if he doesn't due to being a low-quality upload of himself or just because whatever happened was delegated through several layers of his organization and there was a lot going on at the time. 

There isn't any point apologizing for it now, and he doesn't feel sorry because emotions are banned. 

He tries to think through the various considerations here. The main one is that it's been five months. 

:I̸̞̚ṱ̵̉ ̵̙͒c̶̹̏ó̵̠ŭ̶͜l̶̡͝d̷̫͑ ̶̙̋b̴̪͌e̴͎̕ ̴̤͛w̴͙̔o̴̹̎ȓ̸̘t̶͇͒h̵͈̚ ̵̜̓c̴̡͐o̸̱̚n̴̥̚t̷̪͗ả̵̺c̸̢̐t̷̩͘ĭ̵̖n̷͖̔g̶͇̋ ̸͔̕t̶̻̚ẖ̷̚e̸̠̽m̵̬͑ ̸̯̈f̸̭̅ȍ̷͕r̷̫̊ ̷̔͜m̴̛̙ȯ̶̱r̷͔͒e̶̼̋ ̶̧̈́ì̴̦n̶̰͠f̷̣͆ơ̶̖r̴͖̅m̸̟̉a̷̤͋t̵͈͝i̶͙͌o̵͎̒n̸͑ͅ:

:I'm pretty sure someone from your organization told the Heralds not to do that?: 

This is the point at which it would be very helpful if he were one original-high-fidelity Leareth instead of a vague buzzing cloud of lossy simulations continually being shut down and rebooted. Also it would be helpful if he had a physical body and could sit all the relevant people down in a room and talk to them face to face. 

Leareth cannot do that. 

: I̴̹͠ ̵̪̈́a̸̤͊m̸̓͜ ̷̭͋s̸̗̏ṕ̴̮e̷̟̕a̴̲̎k̵̤͘i̴̥͌ṇ̴̅g̸̞̀ ̸̅͜w̴̜͗i̷̱̚t̷̰̓h̶͇̄ ̶̔͜t̴̻͊ḫ̴̉ĕ̵̯m̶̻̽ ̴̨̓a̷̲̔l̷̪̊s̵̼͠o̶͍͂ :

̵̬̾
:̸̢̔ Y̵̺͆o̷̼͝ȗ̵͖ ̸̞̀c̷̦͌a̵̺͠ṅ̴̨ ̸̧̀h̸̠̔ã̵͙v̸̠́e̴̥͛ ̵̯̇t̵͙͠h̸̛̼ȩ̶̓ ̶̝̇H̸̡̏ḛ̶̂r̸̝̓ä̷͔́l̷͎̅d̷̹̾š̵̹ ̸̦͂c̵̜̓ĥ̶̘e̸̘̅c̸̯͐k̵͕̔ ̷̝̉i̴̙̚n̶̜̒ ̷͉̚.̸͉͋.̸̹̽.̵̣̓ ̶̰͛

what is time even

:...t̵͕͆ö̷͇́m̶̢͝ò̶͕r̶̖̒r̷̥͋ò̵͇ẇ̸̜?̸̪̀

:All right. I'll, er, do that: 

...There are about twenty different things that Vanyel wishes he'd said to Leareth before. He's been thinking about this a lot. A stupid and unhelpful amount really. He has lists. Most of them discarded and crumpled with half of the items crossed out and then shoved under his bed because he thought about burning them and then mysteriously couldn't bring himself to. 

:...Leareth?: 

: Ḯ̵̪ ̴̗̃à̶̡m̵̧̀ ̵̻̌ş̴͆t̶̛̫i̸̳̓l̷͍̑l̶̙͠ ̴̲͗h̴̗͘e̸̞̕r̸͍͋e̵̪̔ :

:Are you even going to remember any of this later? Or - is this you just going to disappear -?: 

(- discontinuity -)

Goddamnit focus he has to

- what where -

Vanyel needs him t

He wants NOT THIS–

Eventually, with great effort,

: İ̴̘f̶̺̕ ̶̣͠i̷͉͗ṫ̷̺ ̷̮͝i̸̹͌s̴̯̓ ̶̛͈v̴͚̋é̸͔r̵͕̂y̷͎͝ ̶̘͆ï̴̭m̴̻̀p̴̨̀ọ̶̊ṟ̵͘t̸̯̒a̷̮̍n̸̓͜t̷͉̽ ̴̱̏:

̷̤͋
:̴̼̈́ t̶͖͘h̴̳͊e̷̦͠n̴̦͠ ̸͈͗I̸̛̳ ̶͓̿ẅ̸̝i̴̛͖ḽ̸̔l̷̙̄ ̵̬̆a̴͙̽s̷̗̃k̵̢̂ ̵͈̈́t̸̩͊h̸̻͑ė̸̡ ̵͖̾P̷̙̆r̸͍͛o̷̜̒t̷̬̔ö̴̠ ̸̯̍t̸̜̆õ̷̱ ̵͎͌ŕ̵̝e̷̟͊c̴̜̽o̷̡͗r̴̩͝d̷̠̋ ̸̗̚ĩ̴̤t̴͕̉ :

̸̪̉
:̴̜̎ a̸̡͘n̷̜͒d̷̡͐ ̶͚̈́ṫ̸͈e̸̟͝l̵̮̓l̸̛̟ ̸͙͒i̶͈̍t̴̘̆ ̷̖̇t̶͎͘ó̷̰ ̵̪̊a̶̯͠ĺ̷̝l̷̜̏ ̵̹͋o̴̞͐f̵͇͐ ̸͕̾ṫ̶̹h̶̤̉e̴̘͂ ̴͍̍L̵̯̋e̵͍͂a̵͉͋r̴̙͛e̵̛̩t̷̚ͅĥ̶̺s̷͈̒ ̸̭̚ì̷̳t̸̝̐ ̴͖͊r̶̖͂ũ̸̹n̷̖̿s̴͓͘ :

:Oh. I, er - I don't know if it's that important, just...: 

Why is this so incredibly, stupidly, hard?

:...Just, I talked a lot with Shavri. About - you - when you, the original human you I mean, were sick, and she was helping...: 

Vanyel is pretty sure he had a point he was working up to, here, but it's becoming nearly impossible not to cry. 

Leareth waits. Technically he can read all of Vanyel's thoughts right now but this is less helpful than one might hope. 

: I̴̪̅ ̴͕̈́ḁ̵̈́m̸̘͘ ̶̤̔ŝ̵̖ṯ̸̽ḯ̸̩l̷̫̅l̴̙̕ ̸̹̐h̵͕̀ê̸͔ŕ̴̗e̷̪̔?:

:I, just - I don't - Leareth...:

Vanyel takes a shuddering breath. 

:I don't know what you were planning to do with Valdemar or why - what made it worthwhile to murder our Herald-Mage trainees, kidnap littles - guess I never will. Doesn't matter. I don't need to. I - what Shavri saw - I don't know what you were planning but I know you had a reason. And you're not evil. And you - when someone else's world was in danger you, you went to help even though you were dying... That. That's enough. I don't want to be your enemy: 

Leareth diligently listens and parses this, without having any emotions, and relays it to the Proto for later-notes to be conveyed to all the other Leareths. 

: T̸̈͜h̵̜̾a̷̘̕n̶͙͘k̵̩̃ ̵̪̌ỳ̸͔o̸͔͋ű̵͕ :

He is not having any emotions about it but, at this point, maintaining this is mostly requiring not having any thoughts either. 

: D̸̜͂o̷̗͂ ̷͊͜y̶͂ͅo̷̖͊u̷̝̾ ̴͘͜h̴̰͆a̴̻͗v̴͖͗ḙ̸́ ̶̥̀q̶͆͜ṳ̷͆e̴̳̎s̵͉̅t̶͕͊i̵̾͜ö̷́ͅn̶͙͠š̷̨ :

Everything about this is uncannily wrongbadawful, which isn't Leareth's fault but it still hurts so much. 

All right, he does need to ask the OBVIOUS question. :Is Velgarth in danger from the Proto?: 

:̸͍͛ ̶̞͂Ĩ̶̤ ̵̻͝c̵̺͘a̵̡̓n̷̨͋n̵͖̋ò̵̮ṯ̴͝ ̷̲̒g̵̝͂u̷̹̎ả̷̠r̵̘̕ả̴̪n̴͖̓t̷̟͋e̶͓̕e̶̪̒ ̷̢̐b̸̯̍ŭ̴̠t̶̖͐ ̶̯̆Ĭ̶̳ ̷̹͆t̵̰̊h̴̛̼i̷̺̚n̴̝̑k̴͖̀ ̴͔̉n̵̡̄o̷̐ͅt̶͚͂ ̸̡̛:̶̯̀

̵͍̾
̷̰̃:̶̙̂ ̷̝͠Î̵̺t̶͍͝ ̵̼̆ẅ̴̨́i̵̗̒ḽ̵̌l̶͈͆ ̵̟̓e̸̾ͅạ̷̇t̶̠̆ ̵̩̾t̴̥͗h̶͎͊e̴̻͠ ̷̻̐M̵̥͒o̸̰̒o̶̯͆n̸̘͊ ̷̹͌ă̷̜n̴͔͐d̸̪͐ ̶͕̈́m̶̧̀à̵͈k̵̼̽e̸̬͐ ̶̺̚å̴̭ ̸̫̽w̷̜͝o̵̱͒r̸͓̄m̷̙̿ẖ̵͆ó̴͇l̵͓̍ḙ̷̊ ̴̪͌:̶̪̈́

̷͚̒
̸̗́:̸̎͜ ̶͎̏T̶̟̓h̴͙̍e̵̱͆ṅ̸̗ ̵̞̓ ̷̛̝ ̷̟͝.̶̧͠.̷̻͘.̵͔̈ ̴̱̋ ̸͙̑ ̵̎ͅI̵̲̊ ̷͔͘s̶͍͌u̶̺͂p̴̠͘p̸̳͌ò̵͓s̶͓͑e̷̜̊ ̷̛̘w̶̻͒e̶͖̿ ̷̙̓ṡ̵͎h̸̩̍a̷̟̿l̸̬̄l̵͈̉ ̴͔́m̵̧͆e̸̠̾e̵͉̽ẗ̶́ͅ ̸̭́i̵̺͊ť̵̝s̷̞̆ ̶̦̀c̶̮̕r̴͖̊e̵̦͒a̸̱̓t̸͚́o̶͇͂ŕ̵̜ṣ̶̊ ̵̫́:̸̩͠

̴͇̑
̴̙͝:̷̽ͅ ̸̭̂O̵͍̔r̵͍̀ ̶͇̃f̵̲̚i̶͇͑n̶̫͂ḑ̵̄ ̴̻̕t̸̗̊h̷͍́è̶̠ ̵̰̿r̶̿ͅú̸̢i̶̢̎n̶̫̿s̵͈͘ ̴̼͒õ̴͕f̴͖͐ ̸̨͋t̷̫̍ȟ̴͍e̵̮̍i̴̱͋ṟ̵̀ ̷̺̀c̷̈́͜i̴̝͑v̸͕̾ì̷̙l̴͈̚i̸̜̾z̴͕̒a̴̩̒ẗ̶̟́i̷̩̕ǒ̶̦n̵̠͒ ̵͖̈:̵̫́

̷̹̑
̴̭̇:̷̧͊ ̸̮̅I̸̭̓ ̶͙̏a̶̩͆m̸͍̐ ̵͇͆n̵̖̑ợ̵t̷̥̒ ̷͉̐ś̴̬ȗ̶͜r̶̠̉e̴̠̎ ̸͔̌:̵̙́

He can process that later. 

:Are you - is your original...body...still alive?: 

: I̶̗͊ ̵̯̎h̷̒͜a̶͉͗v̸̘͆e̷̡̅ ̵̹̃n̸͑͜ő̶̝ ̶̜́i̷͓͝ǹ̸̲f̶̉͜ȯ̷͍r̵̈ͅm̶͔̀a̸͍͠t̷͓͗i̴̙̒o̵̜̽n̸͕̏ ̷̖̾ȍ̷̮n̷͖̍ ̴̛̮t̶͍̿ȟ̴̲a̶̱̓t̸̻̓ :

:Right. I, er, I think that's all my questions. I - I hope...: Vanyel isn't at all sure what he's trying to say. :Take care: 

Leareth thinks that it's very unclear how he can possibly do that, but he doesn't say this. 

: G̸̺͑ơ̷͎õ̸͔ḍ̶̉b̶͍̿y̷̯͝ȅ̴͎,̶̯̈́ ̴̦̔Ȟ̷̩e̷̟̅r̵̟͊â̵̧ļ̸͝d̵̼̽ ̶̠͝V̶̬͑a̷̡̓n̴̘̽y̵̻͒ě̸̫l̵͈̀ :

:̶̟̈ ̸͇͆I̶͙̋ ̴̮͠w̷̌ͅi̸̪͝s̸͈͗h̵͇̾ ̵̩̓ỷ̷̝o̷͓͒ü̴͉ ̷̦̉w̵͙̕e̵͇̕l̴͈͘l̴̥͑ ̵̨̒:̵͔̓

Leareth tells the Proto that he's finished gathering information here and that it can stop reading all of Vanyel's thoughts. 

Then he stops trying not to have any emotions about the last few subjective minutes, which he predicts will result in his very rapidly triggering a safeguard and being shut down. 

Yes! That Leareth had a lot of outside-parameters behavior. 

The protomolecule feeds other Leareths the output of its gods classifier, and grows, and grows.

Some Leareths take notes for other Leareths to summarize, and then yet other Leareths to convey to the organization in the north of Velgarth. It's a pretty useful capability to have, for spying purposes. 

Things seem, mostly, pretty quiet in Velgarth? Rethwellan is mostly cleaned up after the post-Dhorisha-Plains-even earthquakes. They're starting to make progress on Jkatha, but there were a lot of casualties there; the country is kind of in shambles. Seejay lost all of its crops, which is now leading to a severe spice shortage.

Iftel is locked up inside its wall not interacting with the world, and the Proto cannot get through the barrier with Thoughtsensing. (Yet, anyway.) 

Karse is...politically unstable, but there hasn't yet been a coup by the priesthood. Lots of thoughts about gods. Many people consider the whole thing with the Moon to be some sort of omen. 

Some Tayledras are getting odd dreams and visions, which they of course believe are from the Goddess, but they haven't figured out what the visions mean or what to do about them yet. They're pretty scared about the Moon. Word of the Plains' destruction has reached them, by now, and there's mass grieving. (They seem to be blaming the destruction of the Plains on the Moon and the entity possessing it, rather than the Goddess.) 

Time passes. 

Eventually an enormous blue ...creature...takes off from the surface of Velgarth's moon and travels very far away, and stops somewhere out beyond the orbit of Velgarth's most distant planet. And it begins building a megastructure 1000km across, circular, gently glowing.

Kilchas watches the sky.

He has a much better telescope for this, now; their collaboration with Leareth's former organization has been a fruitful one. He can clearly see the strange creature depart from the Moon, and watch its movement for a while before it's too distant to see anymore. 

Kilchas has emotions about this. 

They were so scared, at first. And it's not like the safety of Velgarth is anything close to guaranteed, now. Leareth's organization agrees that there's approximately nothing even they can do, if the Proto decides to eat Velgarth too. The - copy of Leareth, the etching taken by the Proto, drawn from his mind like an artist's woodcut - was their only channel of influence, and even the Leareth-copy couldn't make any promises. 

But...maybe it's going to be all right? 

Maybe it's going to be better than all right. He's spent so many months watching the sky, and it's impossible to sustain that much fear for so long, and so eventually the awe took over. Imagine a world where the people of Velgarth could travel, together, between the stars. See other worlds. 

The stars blur in and out of focus as Kilchas blinks away tears, of - he isn't even sure what emotion. Hope? Desperation?

...Grief, for the Leareth who went to try to save another world, and probably died there? 

There's not much to see anymore, anyway; whatever the Proto is doing now, it's beyond what his current telescope can pick out. He knows that Leareth's people are working on a better one, in an observatory somewhere high in the mountains, where the air is thinner and the stars shine brighter and clearer. 

He climbs down from the tower and walks through the gardens, headed in no particular direction, his steps heavy. 

Footsteps approach, fall into rhythm beside him. 

(Little Jisa has been fussy in the evenings, lately, and walking with her helps.)

"Heya," Kilchas says eventually, after a few minutes of walking in silence.

"Any change?" 

Shrug. "Can't tell, anymore. Out of range. ...If it makes something planet-sized out there I reckon it'll show up, but other than that I'm just hoping Leareth's folks up north will let me use their observatory." 

Shavri shakes her head a little. "'Leareth's folks'. Can you imagine the face Elspeth'd have made a year ago, if you said that?" 

"A year ago I didn't have the faintest idea the man existed. Though, I mean, a horrible destiny does explain a lot about Van." 

"Sorry. Er, how is he?" 

"...I wish he'd stop trying to talk to Leareth. Um, the Leareth-copy. He's a mess for a week every time he does, but... I guess I get it, sort of. Why it's - hard to look away." 

Kilchas tips his head back. Stares up at a bottomless sky of stars. "Wonder if he gets lonely. Stuck up there, not having a body..." 

"I really doubt that's his biggest problem. He's got the Proto to talk to, right. And - Van said he was getting - killed and a different Leareth would replace him - constantly, sometimes every few seconds..." Shudder. "I– could you do it? Keep trying to help the Proto do what it wants, keep trying to persuade it not to eat us, when you knew - all the time - that your life was measured in seconds? I don't think I could. Don't reckon I'd have the courage." 

Kilchas doesn't speak for a long time. 

"...S'not really like dying, right? If - if there's also thousands of you waking up every second - it's like being born a thousand more times..." He shakes his head. "And? You would. You'd do it for her." Kilchas jerks his chin at Jisa, sleeping, dark curls resting against her cheek. "Never met a mother who wouldn't do anything they could for their babe." 

Shavri's seen a lot of things that she would rather not have seen, in the House of Healing. "...I have." 

"Well, you would." 

Kilchas walks for a while, humming under his breath. 

"- I wonder if it's a little like being a parent. For Leareth, I mean. He - sounds like practically an alien himself, from what I've heard. Like - maybe the Proto was...more the kind of thing he is, than any of us..." 

Shavri snorts despite herself, then quickly bounces and tries to soothe a startled Jisa back to sleep. "Gods. No, not really. The Proto...didn't know what people were. Didn't understand what death is. Leareth - whatever you can say about what he did, he understands that." 

"Hmm." Kilchas kicked at a leaf. "He killed kids, it's - hard to imagine, but..." He drags a hand over his face. "I've done plenty of things I wish I hadn't, as a Herald. And it's - not the same, I know that - but, I don't know, who am I to say that it's different, either?" 

Eventually, when Shavri doesn't say anything, he chuckles wryly. "- Sorry. I'm just a sentimental old man, rambling and not making any sense." 

"You're really not that old." 

She walks. Eventually, sighs. "...I think Leareth - wanted this. A door to another world. Or, well - it's scary, right, whatever's on the other side might be - worse than we can imagine..." 

"Or it could be the best thing that ever happened to us. ...More likely something in between." 

Jisa is asleep again, and her feet hurt. Shavri stops walking. Sits down on a bench. Looks up at the sky. 

"I guess we'll know soon enough."