S̵̨̯̝͘͝ċ̴̨͎̇̀̎r̷̡̥̭̩͋́̒e̵̡̮͗͐̈̓͜e̴͍̽̏̊ć̵̭̈́̋h̵͇̾́͝ͅ

"Uh..."

"Gosh!"

"Ah! Finally, the Eternal Badger!"

S̵̨̯̝͘͝ċ̴̨͎̇̀̎r̷̡̥̭̩͋́̒e̵̡̮͗͐̈̓͜e̴͍̽̏̊ć̵̭̈́̋h̵͇̾́͝ͅ

"Are you Sure that That Thing is the Eternal Badger?"

"What else Could it Be? I was Summoning the Eternal Badger, and it Showed Up!"

"You have Sometimes tried to Summon the Eternal Badger, but Actually Summoned Other Things."

Haria wiggles, and then gazes at it closely.

"But I will admit it Looks like the Eternal Badger. You said that it was Supposed to, when Slain, to Split in Two New Eternal Badgers, Both of Equal Power and Excellence?"

"Yes!"

"Can we Try It? I should like to See that Happen!"

W̷̼̰̫̄̈́a̴͇̾́͒̾a̷̮̦̱͘ṛ̶̢̠̮̂͋̕k̴̫͂͂

"No! That would Very Rude. It just Got Here!"

Some time later...

"You may absolutely negatively not bring that thing here! It causes [Wisdom] damage if you look at it for more than ten rounds."

"I have always Said that Mortals are Mentally Weak!"

"T̐H̓ĨS͑ ̏I͌S̈́ ̽T͌R͑ȖE"

"Well, I'll Show Them! I'll build My Own Worldwound Fort, With More Badgers! Just Next Door! And we will Destroy Twice as Many Demons!"

"Yes!"

"Iomedae, what have we done to deserve this?"

Some time later...

"Now what?"

W̩H͙A̹A̹A̯A̗R͓K̭

"I am sure this is ALL YOUR FAULT!"

Some time later...

"Well, now that you have Conquered Cheliax, what Are your Plans?"

Eriape tilts her head to the side. "Gosh I hadn't Thought About It!"

"Who's Going to be In Charge?"

Eriape stretches out her arms in a way that would be impressive, if she wasn't so short. "Me! Get all the Remaining Important People here to So that they can be Forced to Swear Fealty!"

"Uh...How?"

"T͔r̘y̭ ͎s̼a̦y̦i̩n̲g͈ ͙yͅo̘u̘'̼r̳e͔ ̠rͅu̳n̰n̦i͎n̹g̜ ͉a̯ ̥Co̩n͈s̝t̞i̟t̺u̯t̜i̲o̙n̝a͖l̹ ͚Co̖n͙ṿe͙n̝t̥iͅo̥n͖.ͅ ̟P̯o̦p͉u̗l̦a̱r̤ ̫ṭr̻i̫c̼k̪ ̱a̪c̟r͉o̱s͖sͅ ̰t̥h̥e͖ ̹m̞u̞l̘t̪i̦v͎e̥r͈s̫e̙!̼"

"That's a great idea!"

Some time later...

"We found Three Farmers and a Baby Goat! They have All Volunteered!"

"Can the goat talk?"

"No! But it Follows me if we Let it. Can we Keep it? It might think I am Its Mother. I promise we will Take Proper Care of It!"

"Okay, if You make Sure to Feed it Every Day! I won't Take Care of it For You!"

"Uh...What about the Constitutional Convention?"

"Oh, Are we still Doing That? I'll have to Kidnap some People! Fetch me my Big Book of Magic!"

"Which one?"

"The one titled 'The Big Book of Insane and Atrocious Magic that Nobody Should Ever Attempt No Matter What, This Means You Eriape Specifically!'"

"That's my Favorite!"