"Did you bake?" exclaims Isabella.

"I did! Though I mostly just followed directions from the internet, nothing particularly fancy. The frosting design was hard-won through toil and copious amounts of magic," he explains.

"Ombre rosettes. Very fancy. Should we eat cake first or should I open my presents? I'm afraid I didn't know there was going to be a whole thing and I've already opened the other things I've gotten."

"Whichever you'd like to do first. I wasn't making this into a whole thing, at least, I think I wasn't? I thought cake and wrapped presents were the custom? Did Google lie to me?"

"Cake and presents are totally customary for birthday celebrations! People just usually celebrate their birthdays most energetically when they're... children. It drops off in formality and organization in the late teens a bit. But I am completely thrilled anyway."

"Aha. Then I can forgive Google. Thrilling you was the point! I did my duty as a boyfriend, hurray!"

"Yes. Best most dutiful boyfriend." She kisses his cheek and cuts a slice of cake for each of them and peers at the inside to see what kind it is.

"Like what, red velvet and pineapple upside-down?" She hands him a plate and grabs a fork.

"Because there are many desserts and many plants that obligingly produce sugar. Have you gotten around to trying maple yet?" And she pops a bite of cake fearlessly into her mouth. "It tastes fine. You did fine."

"You poor thing, what did you have to ask the grocery people?"

Om nom nom. Birthday cake made with love. Halfway through her cake she reaches for her nearest package to unwrap it.

"Oh wow. Wow."

Adarin grins. He explains, "I spelled them so they'll only open for you, as well. Actually the designs were an afterthought, but I had fun with it once I started."

"But they're too pretty to fill with - idle thoughts, now, I'll have to use them for condensed notes only."

He snorts with laughter. "If I ever get you more I can not make them pretty? If you'd prefer?"

"Well, that all depends on what you want me to do with them."

"You can do whatever you like with them, dear. They're yours. If the pretty ones aren't casual enough for your needs them I won't get them. If you like them, I will."

"Well, I guess how casual they are depends somewhat on how many of them I can expect to have."

He snickers. "They're actually not particularly difficult to make, so if you'd like I can give you magic books entirely if you don't go through an absolutely absurd number of books a day. Which I don't think you do?"

"I don't! It usually takes about a month to finish a whole one, maybe faster if Path's on a lot of errands."

"Pff. Oh, that's easy to do. Want me to get you lots of pretty magic books every now and then?"

"Yes. The designs are adorable."

"Thank you, I'm glad you like them."

Isabella eats three more bites of cake, then reaches for the other package.

It has two items inside it! A small black pouch, neatly tied, and a simple stone slab with a portal in it. Isabella can see through the portal, but the other side looks to be completely dark.

"...where does this go?"

Adarin grins. "Open the bag."

She peeps into it.

"Oh wow. I'm putting this slab in a box the length of my arm in the basement. I love you, you know that?"

Adarin giggles. "I love you, too. I'm glad you like your presents!"

"We should figure out when in the Earth - or possibly the alien planet - calendar to celebrate your birthday."

"Ah, yes. That will require math. It's rapidly becoming either my second-greatest ally or my arch-nemesis. I can't decide which."

"I'm first-greatest ally, or are you referring to nonsentient tools and magic is first?"

"You're first. Though now that I think of it, I'll move math to third, since you mentioned it..."

Isabella giggles. "Portal bag portal baaaaag."

He laughs. "I'm glad you like it! If the bag's portal breaks let me know, I will fix it."

"Is that likely?"

"Slightly more likely than usual since it's portable, but I put some protections on it. It's a bag rather than another slab so it doesn't break entirely if dropped. Flexibility, and all that, at the cost of potential for tearing."

Isabella nods. "I'm gonna put my alethiometer and thingamajigs and current notebooks and trail mix and stuff in there."

"Probably a spare mirror or two, as well. Just in case. It'll work between planes, too, if you were wondering."

"Oooooooooh you are good at presents."

He giggles. "Thank you. It helps that I have magic."

"What would you've gotten me if you didn't?" she wonders.

"I hadn't thought about it! Probably still the books, but without the personalized designs and the 'Only Isabella may open this' magic. I have no idea what would replace the portal-bag."

"Well, I'm terribly charmed by the portal bag, so I'm glad we don't live in that universe."

"Me too! I would have been stuck on another plane and I'd have never met you. Also, no portal capitalism would be terrible."

"Yes. Soonish the port will be completed and I can handle more traffic and cut the price and blogs will stop shouting at me."

"People who feel very strongly that everything ought to be affordable to all sectors of the population. At all stages of its development. Regardless of traffic capacity. Either that or they want me to allocate tickets by lottery."

"Uh huh. Do they realize that would shock the entire economy to instantly change methods of transportation like that? It's also a slow settling, along with traffic capacity management."

"These are not econ majors."

"Apparently not. But you'd think they'd have some sense."

"Why would I expect that? We haven't converted them to our religion yet."

He snorts with laughter. "I'll have to write some sermons. Lots of sermons. With good logical arguments and a time for openly discussed questions at the end. That'll convince them."

"We can only hope. Well, maybe they'll like me after I start price-chopping."

"But they're not part of the religion of sense, Isabella. They will probably be upset about the crowds."

"I hired a very expensive person to optimize the design for easy traffic flow!"

"How very sensible of you!"

"Yes! Anyway eventually it'll be cheap and they'll find something else to complain about."

"Probably about the bunch of refugees from another plane. That'll probably be it."

"How dare I put my refugees on another planet instead of fighting to get them citizenship in an existing country? Alternatively, how dare I invite immigration into a plane that rightly belongs to Earthlings, every inch."

"That does just about sum it up, though I can understand if they're worried because - bunch of conquerors that can travel through planes. Though I hope to convince them otherwise. With my charm, good looks, and my ability to throw lots of money at the problem until it goes away."

"I mean, someone could already triangulate the plane by looking for you, or Zeviana, the colonists won't much worsen matters."

Adarin winces. "Yeah, that. That too. Annoying how it works like that. Don't tell anyone that, there will be people who might want to throw us back to New Kystle."

"I can ask Mom to do another layer of wards around the house over mine, and Zeviana I suppose spends a lot of time on the clan grounds. Unless they look for you a lot they might miss you, since witch wards work."

"... You know I didn't even think about how the wards would help? Wow, that's fantastic," he laughs. "Even if they look they might not find me."

"I mean, they could still get lucky when you leave warded areas, but it will certainly make it less rewarding."

"Yeah. It's still nice to have some safety, it kind of - wears after a while. That they could just come after me and drag me back to my own personal, customized version of hell."

"Oh, sweetie." Hug.

Hug. "Sorry. That was a bit over-dramatic."

"No, it's okay - I'll get Mom to put another layer down when next she's free. It's a good idea anyway."

"Thank you. I love you, have I mentioned?"

"Hmmm, I'm not sure, have you? It doesn't sound that familiar..."

"It doesn't? My, what a travesty. I love you!"

Isabella cups her hand around her ear. "What was that? Was it English?"

"What strange alien gibberish is this? I certainly am incapable of comprehending such peculiar words."

"Goodness, are you? That's such a surprise, considering you're you and therefore amazing! Would it help if I drew you a map?"

"A map of what?"

"Of how I love you. There would be lots of hearts. Maybe some flowers, too, it would be very pink and I'd be embarrassed to show it to anyone."

"...I might have to see that."

He laughs. "Only as a last resort. How about if I try again, hmm - I love you! There, did that work?"

"Must have a buildup of earwax or something."

Mmmmmmmkiss!

"I think I might have heard something..."

Kiss! Yaaaaay!

"Ooh probably. Wouldn't want it to go stale in case it takes you a really long time to get through to me."

Ooh! Kisses!

Isabella thinks it was the best birthday! Yaaaay!

"Mmmmm thank you."

"Of course. Hope you have an eternity filled with more. They're fun to celebrate. Though the baking was nerve-wracking."

"Maybe you will improve at it over time."

He laughs. "Maybe, but then where would I get help from nice people at the grocery store that take pity on me?"

"Perhaps you can take up another complicated hobby. You can get advice on knitting from little old ladies in yarn stores."

"I would make you tacky hats. Warm and soft, but tacky, tacky hats. Completely useless to you, since cold is harmless to you."

"Oh dear. That sounds very impractical. Maybe you should take up ceramics instead and make lopsided weird-colored dishes."

"Much more useful. Let's go with that idea, that seems best. Lopsided, weird-colored dishes it is."

"Soon we will be oversupplied with mugs and bowls, but at least they aren't tacky useless cozy hats."

"I mean, I could wear the tacky cozy hats. But you couldn't. So not entirely useless, just not useful for birthdays."

"Priorities, Adarin. We do plan on being immortal. You can make dishes first, hats later."

He laughs. "Of course, of course."

Nuzzle.