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artificer's standard
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Shara is getting very tired of this horse and this forest and the map which has clearly marked hills and rivers and nothing labeled adventures via which to satisfy picky artifacts sold wholesale here. Kayam doesn't seem to mind, but Kayam's more patient than her to begin with, and Kayam's horse is more placid - Shara would trade but she's supposed to be gentling this one as long as she has a long consecutive while to do it in.

Her horse veers off left. Shara steadies it - but looks left, why not, to see what's distracted the horse.

Well, that's one hell of a garden. It's got residual magic over it - the raveler's equivalent of lint, nothing Shara can mess with while the plant raveler's not actively working on it, but there is definitely a plant mage here.

The house has the same property.

And so does - something else.

Three different kinds of raveler-residue over the same property. All recent, though the house, requiring no active maintenance, less so than the garden and the - other thing.

Shara raises a hand; Kayam comes to a halt while Shara squints.

And then the unfamiliar something inside the house flares and Shara gets a very clear look at what's making the third kind of lint.

She promptly loses her breakfast onto the excuse for a trail they're riding on before she can even think about interfering with its work.

"Whoa, milady, what's - what's wrong, were the rations bad -?" asks Kayam

Shara shakes her head. "Some kind of raveler I don't recognize in that house. They're - I don't even know how to describe it. Raveling people."

"...The way you say that I somehow don't think you mean like healers do."

"Not like healers do," shudders Shara, swigging water. "Raveling their - feelings, I guess. There's people in that house and I don't know if there's a thing keeping them all together except the magic."

"Could... you... stop them, if they tried to do it to us?" asks Kayam slowly.

"I think so. I was caught off guard - there, they're doing it again, I can't reach from here but I can see the stitching. I think I could counter it."

"You think."

"If it was coming at me, absolutely - I'm less sure I'd grab it in time if it was aimed at you. It doesn't feel long-range, though."

"Okay. So - what do you want to do, milady?"

Shara thinks.

"Tie up the horses. You hang back here and watch through the window. I'll - knock on the door and see if I can fix the problem by talking. When I've figured out who it is, if I've decided they can't be reasoned with or I'm worried they're going to keep raveling at me until I'm too tired to stop them - I'll let off a flashball and you fold straight in - don't walk through the garden, it'll turn on you if the plant mage wants - and then I guess you kill this particular raveler. Maybe their work will dissolve when they die and the others will be okay."

"What if their work, um, does not dissolve when they die, as a for-instance?"

"Then," says Shara, "we'll be in a house with a bunch of people who just watched us kill their best friend, and you will fold us back to our horses smart-quick and we will run away very fast, but at least no one else will get - mindraveled."

"This sounds a bit more dangerous than your usual sort of idea," says Kayam.

"It's pulling double duty," says Shara, and she dismounts, and approaches the house, and knocks.
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A pretty blonde opens the door. She looks cheerful and happy, smiling at Shara.

"Oh, hi! Random traveler person! You are attracted by the pretty house, lots of people are attracted by the pretty house. If you are a bandit I recommend turning around and walking back the way you came, 'cause this is the wrong house for that. If not, though, we're really friendly! Hi!"
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Yeah, Shara bets they're really friendly.

"I'm not a bandit, promise. I've just been wandering through the woods."
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"Wandering? You're not running from anybody, are you? Are you okay?"

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"I'm fine. I know my way back home and I'll go there eventually. I've just been out exploring."

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"Oh, all right. Do you want to come in? We can make you tea."

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"I'll come in, but no tea for me, thanks."

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"Suit yourself!" The woman moves to let Shara in, and calls inside, "Hey, everyone! We have a visitor!"

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"Who's 'everyone'?" asks Shara.

"I'm some everyone!" says Tima, peering around the corner. "A couple of us are off in town shopping now, though. I'm Tima. Who're you?"

"My name's Shara," says Shara.
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"I'm Zeviana, everyone's - everyone. Chelasi and Adarin and Anlon and Jony and Kesaven and Quel and - there's a lot of us. We're all really nice, though, don't worry."

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"You all seem very nice," agrees Shara levelly. "The garden's beautiful, have you got a mage here?"

"Two!" says Jony, appearing and smiling brightly. "I'm the plant mage, I'm glad you like the garden. Kesaven's a builder." Kesaven, who has also appeared to have a look at Shara, waves.

That's those two ruled out, then, assuming they're telling the truth.
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"I'm Chelasi," says Chelasi. "What brings you here?"

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"...Wandering around in the wilds. Looking for something to do, more or less."

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"You must be made of some tough stuff!" says Zeviana brightly. "If it's just you here."

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A man pokes his head around the corner. He doesn't introduce himself, but he does wave.

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Shara waves at him too. "I have a horse, so that helps."

She's not going to mention Kayam yet.
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"It sounds lonesome," sighs Chelasi.

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"I'm really all right. Besides, as it happens I'm a raveler too. And soon I'll go home to my mother and father and then any residual loneliness will clear right up."

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"Wow, fancy that. When Rin and I got here we were happy for the company, the cool raveler tricks were just a bonus." She grins at Jony and Kesaven.

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While Zeviana's speaking, Chelasi makes one of her fidgety gestures -

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- and Shara hisses and slams her hand on the table right through the attempted ravelry, which shreds -

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- and Chelasi shrieks and scrambles backwards -

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- and Shara gets a flashball out of her pocket and drops it to the ground, where it goes off and illuminates the room just as she shuts her eyes, and she starts shouting, "KAYAM, IT'S THE BLONDE, THE BLONDE ONE IN BLUE -"

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Adarin reacts quickly - he doesn't know why Chelasi reacted so violently, but obviously she is in danger. He makes a sweeping gesture, like he's throwing a blanket over her - and then she is safe. He is blinded a split second later by the flashball.

"Augh!" he hisses, covering his eyes.
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Kayam folds in, has not been blinded by the flashball, and stabs at the only blonde-in-blue in the room with her long knife, only for it to clink off harmlessly.

"Milady -"
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"I see it -" Shara reaches out to shred the shield.

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Zeviana can't see, she's just as blind as the rest of them - but she's the one with actual combat experience. She follows the voice, the new one she doesn't recognize, and moves to knock the owner's teeth in. With her eyes closed, because she isn't going to be blinded again.

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Kayam needs to keep enough energy in reserve to get her and Shara out of here. Moving them out of the path of the blow - when she's just going to need to charge back in to properly stab the target - is costly.

Changing the path of the punch -

Through Adarin's shredded shield goes Zeviana's fist. Kayam tries with her knife again.

This time it hits. There's a wet, choking sound.

Jony and Tima are clinging to each other and crying. Everyone else is screaming, some of them Chelasi's name, and rubbing their eyes.
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Zeviana's fist meets Chelasi's face. She opens her eyes with a triumphant smile -

- and then through the spots and blurred vision she sees who she punched. Then she sees the blood.

"No," she says, and then she's trying to stop the bleeding and it's - there's too much blood, just everywhere. She can't. There's no way. She tries, anyway. "No!"
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Adarin feels cold. He blinks away the spots, trying to clear his vision, as he picks up the shredded remains of his shield. He failed. Chelasi's dead. He doesn't even understand why, it just seems so - random. That they specifically targeted her, so - systematically.

"Why?" he half-sobs. "She did nothing to you!"
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"She tried - Kayam, is she? -"

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"Not breathing - did it? -"

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"No. Shit, she must've worked more like an artificer -"

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"What? She wasn't a - you just - what did you think she was doing? She hasn't hurt anyone in her life!"

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Shara backs up so she's back-to-back with Kayam, in case someone lunges for them, but maybe she can afford to explain.

"I'm a metaraveler. You saw. She was something I've never seen before, raveling people, raveling you, and I might have thought it was worth seeing if she had all of your permission to do it until she tried to grab me."
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"What do you mean raveling people?!" hisses Zeviana, giving up on trying to save Chelasi. She's gone. Now, the woman is looking like she is ready to lunge for them.

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"Attack and I fold us right the fuck off, no explanations," warns Kayam.

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"She was making you like her, like each other, and I thought it might wear off if she died, some ravelings do, but this one - didn't," says Shara.

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"Making us like her? She doesn't need to do that, she's - she was great, you're lying!" she cries, getting up and getting ready to lunge -

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- Then Adarin makes a sweeping motion towards Kayam and Shara. They're both protected. He knows Shara can tell, so he doesn't explain himself.

"Vi. Stop, we're not murderers, we should hear them out -"
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"Maybe you're not! They just killed Chelasi, I think murdering is kind of fucking called for right now!"

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Shara places a quelling hand on Kayam's arm, since Kayam can't tell they're shielded and was making to escape.

"I would've tried to talk it out with her but she tried to make me like her pretty much as soon as I said I was a raveler. Didn't three mages in the house seem like a lot to you? Until you realize it was four."
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Silence. Then, "Fuck."

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"We were out riding around and I could feel her giving somebody a - booster."

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"There's a puddle of puke where she was when that happened," mutters Kayam, "and this is the thanks milady gets?"

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"Hey, you just stabbed my - I thought she was my friend. Yes this is the thanks you get for killing someone with no explanation!"

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The shield raveler is currently not doing anything. He has a blank expression on his face, staring at Shara. The shield is still around her and Kayam.

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"There wasn't time to explain. It took me at least twice as much energy to undo her spell as it took her to cast it. She would've gotten me before I could get out more than a sentence or two."

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Zeviana doesn't have a reply to that.

Instead, she turns and kicks Chelasi's corpse. "You were using me to get to my brother?!" she screeches. Then she kicks the corpse again.
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Anlon, previously paralyzed with horror, flings himself over Chelasi's body, heedless of the blood.

"How could - how could you just assume - we were happy," he chokes out at Shara.

"You were manipulated," says Shara.

Anlon shakes his head and gathers Chelasi up into his arms, weeping.
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"... Seriously, Anlon? You're siding with Chelasi?! She spent - three years lying to me and my brother and magically manipulating our opinion of her and -" Pause. "... And probably you, too. All of you."

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That's when the shield raveler sinks to the ground and wraps his arms around his legs, blank expression on his face. He doesn't seem to be taking the news well. In fact, he looks like he could probably use a hug right now.

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"We were happy!" Anlon repeats, cradling his dead - person. "I knew her longer than any of you."

The other friends are still mostly crying.

"If - some of you want to disperse from this house here and don't have other places to go, I can take any number of you to Casasha and help you get settled somewhere," Sharabel says. "If you all want to leave I want to delay leaving until those who were out shopping have come back so they can get explanations and the same offer."
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"I am so up for dispersing, Casasha sounds good a place as any."

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"That's one. Erm, we can wait a bit if everyone else needs - time to decide," says Shara.

"Chelasi," sobs Anlon.

Jony flings herself out the front door to go comfort herself with plants. Tima, bereft of hugs, takes tentative steps in Adarin's direction. "Adarin?"
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Adarin doesn't reply. But he makes another sweeping motion, with his hand. The shield moves from Shara and Kayam - to himself. He does it not for the sake of bodily protection, but for enforced personal space. Tima will not be getting hugs. She will not be getting within two feet of him.

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"Ad-" Tima reaches the shield. "Adarin, let me help. Please?"

"On guard," Shara murmurs to Kayam, when the shield goes, though it no longer looks like anyone's going to attack them.
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"No," says Adarin, quietly. "I don't believe there's anything anyone can do to help."

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"Just based on the fact that she was doing booster spells I expect it to wear off," Shara says. "If you stay near enough me to check in occasionally I can tell you when the residue is gone."

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"That... Would be fantastic, thank you." Pause. "For the - saving, too. Thanks for that."

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"You're welcome," says Shara.

"Adarin," Tima pleads.
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"No," he says, more forcefully.

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Tima sniffs and goes to find someone else to hug her.

"No need to be cruel," mutters Anlon, still crying over Chelasi.
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"I beg your pardon?" growls Adarin. "It's cruel to not want to be touched and wanting her to respect my boundaries?!"

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"You never would have snapped at her for wanting a hug, before," Anlon mutters. "We were happy before, we were happy..."

Kesaven, shellshocked in a corner, says, "You knew her longest. Did you know this about her?"

Anlon doesn't answer.

Shara shudders.
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Adarin gives Anlon the most icy death glare of all time.

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"Did you fucking ask us if we wanted to be happy at the price of freedom?!"

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Anlon doesn't say anything, just goes on crying on Chelasi.

Kesaven flees the room and can be heard packing his possessions.

Shara chews her lip awkwardly, still standing back-to-back with Kayam.
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"Are you defending her, Anlon?! You knew and you - you agreed to it, didn't you?!"

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"I'm in mourning, I'm in fucking mourning, don't interrogate me right now," mutters Anlon.

"Kayam, if they start attacking each other -"
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"I'll do what I can," mutters Kayam.

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"You're avoiding answering it, you knew and you went along with it, you bastard I'll fucking kill -"

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"Vi."

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"Aaauugh!" says Zeviana, and she snatches up a nearby teapot and throws it into an empty wall. Predictably, it smashes, splatters of leftover tea and porcelain going everywhere.

Zeviana stalks upstairs to pack. She gives Anlon a glare on the way up.
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Anlon ignores her.

Kayam looks at the remaining people in the room: corpse, Adarin, Anlon, everyone else fled and scattered. "Er, milady. Should we be - dealing with the body -?"

"Don't touch her, neither of you touch her," says Anlon. "I'll burn her when I'm ready. Ought to burn you but she would've wanted me to live."
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"You will not be touching them," says Adarin, from his little shield-bubble of angst.

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"And I'd turn whatever he threw at us back in his face," says Kayam.

Anlon sobs.
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Adarin thinks that's a pretty fair thing to do.

He doesn't start any sort of conversation or do much of anything, really. He will just be there, in his shield. Curled up around himself and not moving. Occasionally his fist clenches, then he takes a deep breath and it relaxes.
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"Is there anything we can do for you, Adarin?" asks Shara. "I do feel - responsible, there might have been a gentler handling available if I'd thought about it harder..."
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"No, thank you," he says. "It was not - you are not at fault. I would be freaking out just as badly if you'd sent me a pretty letter with flowery calligraphy."

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"Okay. Are you going to want to come with us to Casasha?"

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"Possibly. It's - not like I have anywhere else to go," he murmurs.

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"There's always work for ravelers, and if you aren't up for it for a while I can put you up to start out."

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Nod. "Thank you, again. You're too kind."

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"You're welcome."

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He doesn't have the heart, to try smiling. So he won't. Back to silence.

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"Milady, are we eating our rations or raiding the house?"

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"Seems to add insult to injury to take the contents of the kitchen. If - the gardener, I guess - offers we can accept but let's not presume."

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"I don't think any of us care," calls Zeviana, as she returns from her packing upstairs. She packed quickly, she doesn't want to stay here any longer than necessary. Two bags - one for her, one for Adarin. "'Cause I'm definitely raiding the kitchen."

Adarin's bag is deposited next to him, outside of his radius of 'no touching.'
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"Still."

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"Suit yourself," she shrugs.

She heads off to the kitchen, for raiding purposes.
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Adarin does not move to pick up his bag. Shield bubble of angst, that is the thing he is going to focus on.

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"Let's go see if the gardener's going to kill us if we step out," says Shara to Kayam.

The gardener doesn't kill them when they step out, so they retrieve their horses and tie them up nearer by, and then Shara circulates through the house, shadowed by Kayam. Jony's staying with her plants, uncontested, so she can pass the news to those who are out shopping when they're back, and expects they'll go to Quel's family in Antaurb. Anlon's staying, and Jony doesn't seem to object. Everyone else seems to have a place to go that they can get to by themselves - Tima doesn't but she's tagging along with Dayree. It's only the brother and sister who'll be wanting guidance back to Casasha.

She circles back to him.

"We don't need to wait for the shoppers to get back. When do you want to go?"
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"I don't know," he murmurs.

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His sister is nearby, packing food into bags for traveling purposes. Water, too, because she's done this sort of thing before.

"Well I'm ready to go now. C'mon, Rin, do you really want to be here any longer than necessary? I packed your stuff, we can just leave right now."
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Zeviana peers at him.



"Stop that. Stop that right now."
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"No. Don't you dare, you son of a bitch. You damn well know the truth. So stop it, right this instant, or I swear I will find a way to punch you if you keep it up. Shield raveler or no."

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"Um?"

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"Doubt it's our business, Kayam."

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The shield does not go down. Adarin just looks at his sister.

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Zeviana stomps her foot. "Stop it! Don't you - don't you dare act like that! You asshole, how dare you, I fucking love you and the raveler bitch has nothing to do with it!" Her voice raises in volume by the end.

"So stop it!" she repeats. "Stop it right the fuck now because so help me I will find a way to pummel you for doubting that it's genuine!"
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"Sorry," mumbles Adarin. He waves his hand, and the shield disappears.
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His sister is not usually huggy. She will make an exception. She scoops him up into a hug and mutters, "If I catch you doing that again I will throw you in a lake."

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Adarin laughs, a little. "Oh no, not a lake."

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"...From what I saw she definitely couldn't have fabricated or adulterated memories," says Shara in tentatively helpful tones.

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"That helps. Thank you."

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"Yup. So if I see you doubting me again, lake. If you do it at all, better aim for the summer, 'cause I'll throw you in a frozen lake to snap you out of it, don't think I won't."

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Adarin laughs, a little. "Your sacrifice touches the hearts of men and women everywhere."

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"Soooo, are you set to leave?"

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The hug ends!

"Yes." He ducks his head. "Sorry to keep you."
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"Don't worry about it. We were on a trip of indeterminate length anyway. There's two horses, who do each of you want to share with? Or we can share and you two can have one, if one of you knows how to ride Casasha-trained horses."

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"Nooot a clue." She looks at Kayam. "Can I go with you, because you stabbed Chelasi and I am happy about this fact?"

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"Uh, sure. My horse is the black one. It was on milady's instructions, though."

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Shara shrugs. Out they go. She mounts the roan, and offers Adarin a hand to help him up.

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"You did the stabbing, and you also did that sweet magic move where I got to punch Chelasi in the face! It was kick-ass!"

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Adarin snorts at his sister's comments, then takes the offered hand and is helped up. Thankfully, he's ridden a horse before. Not a Casasha-trained horse, but it counts. For not immediately falling off of the horse, anyway.

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And they're off, Shara leading the way. Shara is willing to let it be a quiet trip if Adarin prefers.

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"It was cheaper than getting out of the way of the punch," says Kayam. "Folding's a good specialty but it's exhausting if I do it more than once or twice."

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He's not quite sure what he prefers, yet. He's gotten so used to - being surrounded by happy people. Happy people that all got along. So out of curiosity and a missing familiarity with doing anything else, he asks, "What sort of trip of indeterminate length, if you don't mind me asking?"

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"Ooo, makes sense. Cost effective and kickass, I approve!"

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"I was expecting you to be more annoyed with me."

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"Wandering around looking for something useful to do so I can impress a temperamental artifact."

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"That seems to be half of an explanation?"
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"Nah, why would I be annoyed with you? You did it to take down Chelasi."

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"How much do you know about Casasha?"

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"'Cause... it seemed like her magic was really strong and she was using it on you all the time and it made you like her?"

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"Well. Admittedly not very much. Why?"

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"Well, yeah, and I liked her a lot. But then I learned about her magic and now I hate her. You can still like someone and also hate their guts and want them to die in a fire."

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"I am unfamiliar with the sensation!"

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"So I know how much context to supply. So, Casasha's throne doesn't have traditional inheritance. Or, not all the time. The child or children of the existing monarch regnant get first crack at the position, but if they don't get it by age twenty-one - or if there is no such person - anyone from a pennon family can send anyone they like to have a try. And if that doesn't work commoners can give it a shot, too. The way you get the regnant crown is by convincing the heir crown that you are the sort of person who should rule Casasha, and the traditional way to do that is to have an adventure, rescue one or more people from some sort of horrible fate, and then show up covered in glory and possibly new scars with exciting backstories and see if the crown will float when placed on your head. So I was looking for things to do in that - category, and Casasha's in pretty good not-very-adventurous shape, so I was wandering the wilds. The crown allows you to have your adventures with companions so I brought Kayam."

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Adarin peers at her. "... Should I be calling you your majesty?"
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"It's like an ex girlfriend, basically. Or boyfriend, I guess you might swing that way. Hating someone but also liking them."

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"Highness, milady, Princess, or Pennon all work. Even if the crown takes to me like a friendly puppy my father's still alive, so not majesty. And only if you want to. You can skip it if you'd rather. Kayam likes it for some reason."

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"I don't hate my ex-girlfriends."

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"Ah, I see. Thank you." He pauses, and then grins. "Milady."

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"I mean... Not all ex-girlfriends? Just - some of them. It's like - you like them, but there are things that you hate about them that you can't get over, so the liking becomes fuel for hating them because you hate how you like them. Did that help?"

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"I am still unfamiliar with the sensation but I'm glad you don't want to punch me!"

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"You're welcome."

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"If the crown doesn't consider this enough of an adventure I promise to look at it sternly."

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"I'm glad I don't want to punch you, too! That would be awkward, we're sharing a horse."

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"That's very kind of you. I have a few more years if it doesn't approve, anyway."

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"Super awkward! Let's be not-awkward here on the good horse Featherfoot."

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Adarin nods. "Good luck to you. Strange that the crown doesn't judge by the ability to rule, though. Just - the ability to go on adventures and save people. Apparently."

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"Yup! Goooood Featherfoot." Zeviana pets Featherfoot.

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"Mm-hm." Kayam is out of things to say now.

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"You'd have to take it up with a long-dead artificer. It hasn't picked us any bad monarchs, anyway, and it's idiosyncratic enough about what adventures count that there could be a secondary criterion like that."

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"Hmm. Then I will give the crown a pass. It may proceed picking monarchs with my permission. I'm still going to look at it sternly if this doesn't count as an adventure."

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Zeviana isn't out of things to say!

"So, seen any cool things while traveling? I stayed still for so long that I think I want to travel now. A lot."
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"I'm sure the crown will be glad to hear that you don't demand its retirement."

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"Mostly just a lot of scenery. Nice scenery, I like scenery! But nothing screaming tourist destination."

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"Yes, it will wake up one morning to begin its crowny day and say, 'Hmmm. I feel as if some random foreigner doesn't demand my retirement!' It will comfort it, certainly."

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"Eh, oh well. Worth a shot, I'll just have to see for myself, then!"

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"Sure. Milady's offering you a place to be for a while, not a horse and trail rations, but you could get them if you tried."

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"You're ascribing a lot of human characteristics to this crown."

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Adarin laughs a little. "Well I don't know what else to compare it to. I've never met a crown that chooses the fate of a country."

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"Eh, I'll make money and then get them myself. Wouldn't want to impose."

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"It's fairly dull-looking as crowns go," Shara says. "Except when it's on a cooperating head. Then it does the floaty thing."

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"Sure. What kind of job do you suppose you'll do?"

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"The floaty thing is kind of cool, admittedly."

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"No idea. Could get into guarding things, could also go back to fighting rings. Then betting on myself. Maybe something else, too, but it's not like I could cultivate any skills at the house of evil magic."

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"I don't think Casasha has much of a fighting rings scene."

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"You haven't even seen it. For that matter neither have I, but there's portraits of my father in the heir-crown before his predecessor died."

Shara's horse misses a step; she doesn't fall, but does stumble. Shara keeps her seat, but a less practiced rider may have trouble.
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Shara's passenger is a less practiced rider. He makes an 'Eep' sound and reflexively grabs the nearest thing for stability. This happens to be Shara. It ends up remarkably similar to a hug - Adarin takes a few seconds longer than usual to realize that hugging in this situation is probably not okay.

"Um," he says. Then, he releases her from the hug. "Sorry, sorry, reflex -"
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"Then I'll go with the guarding thing. Pity, it was fun to make bets on myself and see people laugh at how terrible the odds were." She grins.

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"It's okay," says Shara. "If you're not used to riding it happens. Go ahead."

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"I wouldn't think you'd be in very good practice."

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"It's still - probably not something that you want right now."

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"I'm really not. Living in a cult house in the woods does that. But there's only one way to fix it."

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"There's classes, just not brawling for money."

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"It's up to you. I don't mind, I don't want you to fall off."

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"... Well. The thing is, I am extremely used to physical contact now. To the point where I'm missing it after - a very short time. I - don't think it's very fair? To you? To put you in that complicated situation and hugging you."
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"Hmm. Maybe I could do that, once I got back in practice. That's a good idea, thanks!"

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"Are you getting at something more complicated than the described? Because I'm not sure why it would be unfair to me just because it would apparently really help you."
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"Oh, you mean teaching them. I was thinking taking one would help with the practice thing."

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"My entire head is kind of complicated right now, I am trying to be relatively normal but honestly I'm a contradictory mess."

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"Guess I can do that, too. That could be fun."

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"Safer than getting into random fights, too."

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"I... don't think I understand, which I suppose makes sense considering. But I don't mind if you hold onto me whether it's for emotional reasons or not to fall off the horse as long as it stays appropriate."

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"I'm also worried that my idea of appropriate is warped now because everything was fine back at - the house."
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"Pfffff. Pff. General intelligence, sanity. There is none of that here, haven't you heard that I punch people?"

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"What you were doing a moment ago was fine. Was it - from what I saw it would have been well within her power to manufacture sexual attraction but I didn't see specific signs -"

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"I noticed."

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"... Fuck, Vi," he whispers.
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"Sorry about the attempt, by the way. To punch you."

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"Oh, all's forgiven."

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"I can't tell you for sure. The two spells I caught in action didn't include it and the residue all looks the same but it might either way."

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"That... brings... a whole new brand of horror to the situation."

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"Oh good, because we decided not to make this super-awkward."

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"I'm sorry."

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"Yes. Yes we did. Aren't we smart."

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"It's not your fault. Thank you for getting us out of - that situation."

Adarin gives his sister a worried look.
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"We are! Go us!"

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"Mm-hm. Your brother is looking at at least one of us and I bet it's not me."

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Zeviana turns and looks at Adarin. "... Yeeeeees?"

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"Later."
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"Okay. Don't hurt yourself worrying, Rin! About whatever it is!"

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"If there's anything I can do to help will you tell me? You won't even be putting me out, I have my own aforementioned reasons to want you thoroughly rescued even if I were a callous unfeeling person and I'm not."
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Adarin nods. "Yeah. Thanks - I'm not sure what I need, yet. I think I'm still in shock, I mean intellectually I get it, but every now and then I wish Tima were here to hug me or that Quel would sit with me and not ask any questions or - just the place in general." Wince. "Chelasi included. Which makes me feel rather sick."

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Shara nods.

"I'm so sorry."
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"It's not your fault, you saved us from it. You have nothing to apologize for."

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"Well, I could have left sooner."

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"It'll drive you mad thinking what ifs in hindsight with information you have but didn't at the time. As my sister puts it... Stop it," he says gently. "Milady."

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"I will be quite sure to avoid driving myself mad. But I'm still sorry."

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"Don't be? Please?"

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"All right."
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Adarin pillows his head on Shara's shoulder for a few seconds - that's all he allows himself, then he straightens back up and says, "Are there any other ravelers that - do what Chelasi did?"

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"I'd be surprised if no one else got it as an option; I've never heard of another kind of genuinely unique raveler. Maybe most of them don't pick it, though. I've never heard of or seen signs of one of her kind before."

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"Good. I would feel the need to go on an adventure to make the person stop it."

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"If I knew of another one I would be way ahead of you. If you hear about such a thing let me know, I'm not sure if I'd bet on your shields against - that."

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"Probably not, no," winces Adarin. "Damn. Well. I suppose I could go with people that are more offensively based than I am."

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"Me and Kayam were a good match for her. Well, the flashball helped."

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"Then, do you mind if I travel with you if you go - evil Chelasi-raveler hunting?"

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"I don't mind."

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"Okay. Then - I might do that if one turns up. Thanks."

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"You're welcome."

After a brief silence: "So what were your options when you got them? I could have had your specialty, as it happens. That or healing - the acute kind."
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"I had weather, animal communication, and - yeah, the acute healing. I almost went with weather, but then I spent too much time weighing the pros and cons of it versus shields and I lost it as an option entirely. So I went with shields."

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"Oof. I had a list of every kind I'd ever heard of, in order, by the time I was twelve, just in case, so I picked in about thirty seconds once I had the chance to check them out more closely. I would've taken artificing if I'd got it, but no such luck."

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"Me too, I would have flung myself at artificing in ten seconds flat," snorts Adarin. "But I'd never heard of weather before so I was trying to figure out if it was large scale and if I could do stuff like - water crops or stop floods or such."

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"Floods, once they're floods, seem a bit beyond weather magic, although I guess you could stop them from getting worse."

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"I meant prevent them from happening entirely. Tell the rain to stop what it's doing when it's nearing dangerous levels, and go shoo over somewhere else where it's more wanted. But - nope, lost weather. Had to be the one I was leaning towards, too, it couldn't have been the animal talking one."

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"Well, the shields seem to suit you, anyway. And I hear weather magic is exhausting."

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Adarin laughs. "I'm not complaining about the shields, I like them, they're neat and tidy and helpful. I just sometimes want to help people large-scale, rather than keeping certain people safe."

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"Yeah. I didn't get anything that scaled well, so I went with generic-and-informative."

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"I am not complaining about your choice of specialty, believe me."

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"Didn't think you were."

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"Yeah."

There's a lull in conversation, and then Adarin realizes something. "... Oh, hell. I think she can take things, along with adding things."
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"That's consistent with what I saw. What are you missing?"
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"... My dad. None of what I did before I met her makes sense unless I loved him." He winces. "And now I don't."

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"I'm so sorry."

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"Yeah. I - I don't even know why she would, why would she even -" Adarin stops, because he sounds like he's about to cry. "... What did it gain her?" he says, trying again.

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"Do you want me to speculate?"

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He nods. "Yeah. I - it might be because he died and I remember missing him?"

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"Maybe she thought that was depressing. There seemed to be a lot of emphasis on being - happy. Maybe she took it before she knew he was dead and didn't want you to leave to go back to him. Maybe she considered it untidy to have anyone with affections for people who didn't live in the house."

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Adarin shudders. "... I can't even imagine. Thinking it's a good idea to just - take away love. Because it's convenient."

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"Neither can I."

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"She needed to die, but I wish she could have gotten - help, mental help. Obviously something was wrong with her."

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"That, I'm not qualified to speculate on."

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Adarin sighs. "Yeah. It's not like we can do anything about it now."

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"I wonder what her choices were."

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"If she gave up artificing for that I think I might want to cry."

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"I'm not sure I'd want to see what kinds of things she'd have made, frankly."

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"... Fair point," he says, sounding horrified.
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"Maybe she should've talked to animals. Made friends with them instead."

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"That would have been far less harmful," he agrees.

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"Yep. She could have had fifteen pets and never hurt a person. But no."

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"Had to make people into her - pets."

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"Was it even obvious that she was the - center, of the household?"

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"N-" He stops. "... Not while I was there, but now that I think of it, it's so - obvious. When I was there it was like she was just a great friend and the nicest of all of us and good at making friends and - and now I see that wasn't it."

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"I wasn't sure who it was until she tried to cast a spell on me, although I could rule out the plant mage and the builder seemed plausible too. But I didn't have long to observe."

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Adarin nods. "It was - subtle, it wasn't - like she demanded our attention all of the time, but I... Remember multiple times if I was busy doing something for long periods of time I would conveniently feel guilty for mistreating my friends, her in particular, and I would stop."

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"Eugh." Shara shudders eloquently.

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"Yes," he murmurs, quietly. "And I never - thought about how horrifying that was. It seemed fine when I was - in there."

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"I mean - how long is too long, could you get even an hour to yourself or do you mean you'd get fifteen minutes?"

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There is a silence.


"Fuck," he whimpers. "I - um, give me a - there's a bit of residual horror washing over me, I kind of want to throw up now."
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"I can stop the horse if you want. I understand completely, I lost my rations when I first saw her cast."

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"It's okay, I don't think I will, it's just -"

Silence.

"There were - orgies. I was not a participant. That was about the only time that I could get - time alone. When she was busy."
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Shara shivers again.

"At... least you weren't a participant?"
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Quietly, almost so soft it's impossible to hear, he whispers, "My sister was."
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"I'm so sorry."

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He nods, a little, not capable of speech right at this moment.

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"Offer to hug me is still open."
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"Thanks," he murmurs, and then he hugs her.

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She takes one hand off the reins to pat his arm, then goes back to steering the horse.

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Adarin is not feeling talkative, but he will keep hugging. It's a very snuggly, gentle hug.

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Fine by her.

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Kayam's the one to call for a halt at around sunset. "I want light to set up the tent and also I want to stop riding, I did a big fold and a little fold and that is several folds and I'm tired."

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"Sure." So they stop, and Shara gently pats Adarin's arm again to get him to let go of her and dismount.

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He lets go of her without any resistance.

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Zeviana peers at him. "You're mopey again."

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"Yes."

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"It seems reasonable. We only have," she adds, "one tent, but it's meant for up to five, and the weather is nice if someone would prefer to sleep out of it tonight."

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Kayam starts setting up the tent in question.

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"Want help with that?"

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"Do you know how?"

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"Nnnnot a clue, but I'll bring enthusiasm to the table!"

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"Okay, sure, you - hold this, and then stand by that bush." Kayam directs Zeviana until the tent is all set up.

Then she ducks into it and flops.
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Zeviana helps dilligently, and then sits down next to her brother when the tent's up.

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"... Are you okay?" he asks her.

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She looks at him.

"Yup. Sucks, and I kind of want to go back and kill Anlon, but. Someone would have made a face at me for that." She nudges him.
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"He knew, but that doesn't make him a completely voluntary colluder, she had obviously been working on him as much as anyone else."

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"He bitched out at my brother for not wanting to be hugged after he learned that he was mind-raped. That shit is not the magic talking."

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"No but people who are grieving say all kinds of things."

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"Mm," says Zeviana, but it's obvious she does not forgive him.

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Shara sighs, and ducks into the tent for the night too.

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"Vi -" begins Adarin, quietly, when Shara departs.

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"- Sh, sh, stop that, I can see you are already freaking the fuck out."

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"Zeviana you'd - they were - it's comparable to rape, are you okay?" he hisses.

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"Yup. Peachy. Occasionally I want to eviscerate some things, but I am not freaking out as much as you are, it was just sex. I had fun and I started a lot of it and enjoyed myself."

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Adarin makes a little sound in his throat and looks extremely concerned.

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"Yeah I was used, yeah I got manipulated and magicked and fucked. But she is dead now, and I can freak out and be traumatized or I could shrug it off and move on, guess which one I'm going with?"

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"But -"

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"Shhh. Shh. It's okay. Promise. You're not allowed to freak out about my health and safety when I am sitting here, telling you with complete honesty that I am fine."

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Adarin looks at her, checking to see if she's lying or putting on a brave face or - or something.

"Okay," he pronounces. "If you're sure."
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"Mhm!"

She scoots over, gives him a quick hug (because he looks like he needs it) and then, into the tent she goes. Sleep. Sleep is a thing she wants right now.
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Hug.

Adarin doesn't feel like sleeping, right now. He props himself up against a tree, and starts dissecting his head for actual opinions of the people he's been around for the last three years, rather than magic ones.



He's still there, in the morning, fast asleep.
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Shara's up in the morning before Kayam. She builds a little fire - she has a artifice foldable knife with a finicky firestarter in one of the compartments, which helps - and fetches some water from the stream they're following and tries to be quiet as she sets about boiling a pot of beans.

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She doesn't wake him. He remains fast asleep.

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His sister pokes her head out of the tent, yawning. She spots him and snorts. "Dork," she mutters.

Then she retrieves a blanket from inside the tent and drapes it over him.
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Aw.

Shara drops a spice packet into the beans and stirs them contemplatively, then pulls out a notebook and writes in it, also contemplatively.
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"What's that?" asks Zeviana curiously. She'd try to peek, but she's not at the right angle and asking is faster.

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"Sort of a diary. Don't read it."

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"Okay," she agrees without fuss. "Sure."

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Kayam climbs out of the tent and takes the spoon out of Shara's hand. "Milady, honestly. ...Has he been out here all night?"

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"Yup. The dork."

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"He's going to have one heck of a crick in his back."

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"Yes, yes he is." Zeviana looks at him. "Oh, and - also, fair warning, he is hilariously non-functional in the mornings. Just like - hand him food and he'll grumble something unintelligibly in a corner until he's woken up."

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"Can do," snorts Shara. She gets bowls out of the packs associated with her horse.

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Zeviana finds a nice place to sit and then waits for food. "If you want any juicy gossip about my brother - now's the time!"

She's joking.
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"Nothing he wouldn't want us to hear."

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"That's not a 'No, Zeviana, I do not want to hear juicy gossip.'"

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"You may tell me anything he'd be all right with us hearing."

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"Okay! What sorts of things should I aim for? I mean, I know his toenail clipping habits but I'm pretty sure you don't want to know about that."

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"Yes, please, carry on with the common sense. I don't have anything specific in mind, it sounded to me like you did."

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"Nah, I was mostly just being silly. One of us has got to lighten the mood a bit every now and then, and right now Rin's being a raincloud." She glances at him. "Well, not right this minute, but he will be when he wakes up, just wait."

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"You seem to be coping better in the strict sense, but I have to say I understand his reaction more than yours."

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"Eh. Should I try and explain it? I'm not sure how to explain it, Kayam was confused about my ex-girlfriend example earlier."

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"I don't have any exes to compare with, so probably I'd be at least as confused."

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"Hmmm. Then - it's like I could get broken up about it and stay angry or freak out, but that wouldn't change anything that happened. So I'm deciding not to be broken up about it."

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"Just like that?"

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"Nnnnooot quite. I mean, there's some spite in there, too. Like - I am winning more by not having her matter to me than I am by freaking out. So I'm trying to do that, and so far I'm succeeding."

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"Huh."

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"Yeah. I mean, I don't know if you care about what my methods are, in my head? That's the specific part I was talking about with the ex-girlfriend bit."

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"I'm a little curious, actually. I have what I think is an unusual self-editing ability but I don't know how well it would hold up against non-self editing having happened."

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"It's not editing. It's - like, okay, there's parts of me that still like her. But! Now there is a huge thing that I can't get over that is terrible and horrific. So because of that, I hate her, on principle. The parts where I still like her are - fuel for that, now, because I hate how I like her and I know the reason why I do, and I hate her for that, too."

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"Huh."

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"I'm not sure if I'm explaining that well enough, but basically - love can totally turn into hate at the drop of a hat, strong emotions lead to other strong emotions. So if I really want to win, properly win - I need to not give a fuck about her. I'm working on that bit, that one's harder."

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"I don't seem to be put together like that, but I'm glad it's working for you."

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"Thanks! Rin's not built like it either, I've got no clue how he's coping. Obviously by sleeping outside, I guess."

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"And fretting about you and your arguable sexual assault."

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"Yeah, that too. I talked to him, I'm genuinely fine, he's the one who's fretting."

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"Well - presumably time will help."

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"I think so, anyway. We'll just have to see."

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"Yeah. And if I find any more Chelasi-type ravelers he's volunteered to help me take them down. Which might be cathartic."

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"Oooo, can I come? I want to come, I can help with that."

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"Uh, there is a certain disadvantage to growing the party because it's costlier for me to interrupt a spell than it is for the person to cast it, so if they can try a lot of targets instead of having to pause to check the success of a single spell, I can be wiped out pretty early."

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"Fair. Awww. Oh well, Rin gets to go adventuring, then."

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"If I hear of any. I might not. I've never even heard of a raveler who does what she did, so I think the option's rare and picking it's rarer."

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"Good, that should not be a magic at all."

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"Take it up with the management," sighs Shara.

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"If I meet them, I will."

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"And let me know where you found them."

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"Yup. You can be next in line, promise."

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Shara snorts.

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Kayam drops a few chunks of cheese into the pot of beans, stirs until it melts, and then starts ladling out portions. "Hey, you, sleep-sitting-up, breakfast."

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"Nmmmrg?"

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"Food." Kayam puts a bowl in Shara's hands and then gives him one.

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"Th'nk you," he murmurs sleepily, yawning and rubbing his eyes. He stretches, then winces. "Ow."
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"Oh look. Sleeping outside sitting up. Painful, huh?"

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Adarin grumbles something unintelligible at her, struggling to get out of the blanket to get food.

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Beans nom nom.

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Beans, with a clumsy and slightly sluggish nom nom.

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Zeviana seems to think this sort of thing is funny, watching her brother struggle with utensils while he is sleepy. She eats her beans, and occasionally giggles at him.

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Aww.

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"It's not nice to giggle at people when they're sleepy," says Adarin archly, still a little slurred but more intelligible now.

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"Whoever said I was nice?"

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"I am unfamiliar with this rule of etiquette myself."

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"Milady, I'm disappointed in you. You are a princess, you should know all rules of etiquette."

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"Perhaps it's just not a Casashan rule of etiquette."

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"Uh huh. That's no excuse, you realize."

He's teasing.
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"At any rate, being a princess doesn't afford me that many privileges or responsibilities apart from what's typical for pennons. It'll step up if I impress the crown and maybe then I'll get foreign etiquette lessons."

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"Aha. That makes it better. Slightly."

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"Do you want to teach me foreign etiquette, Adarin? Since you are so informed."

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"No, no, it's quite all right, I'll leave the education to your tutors, it would be rude to show them up before I even arrive in the country."

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"There you go, demonstrating your expertise again."

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He laughs. "I try."

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Eventually breakfast has been eaten and the things to cook it packed away.

"We usually only eat hot meals breakfast and dinner on the road, and sometimes not those either," Shara mentions. "Takes too much stopping time to pause and cook for midday." She starts saddling up her horse.
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"That's fine," agrees Adarin.

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"Yup! We've been traveling before, we know the ropes."

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"We're getting close enough to Casasha it's probably worth flying your standard now, milady," says Kayam.

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"Sure, why not."

Decorations for her horse's reins and a banner that sits in a nook on the saddle are produced and attached in the correct locations. The banners are blue and bear folded-wing swans as their designs.
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"Ooo, pretty," pronounces Zeviana.

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"Thanks."

Shara heaves up onto her horse and reaches a hand down to Adarin.
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Adarin takes the offered hand, and up onto the horse he goes.

"Thank you."
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"You're welcome. We should be at the border in two days, taking a straight shot - we can let you off there if you prefer, home's another couple days' ride in but it'll be more comfortable when we can stay in inns."

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"To be honest, I really have no idea where we'll go."

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"I can put you up in the royal household for a while. If you need something longer term you need a job description, but 'incidental ravelry' is a job description, that's what Kayam gets paid for."

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"That - would be very kind of you. I suppose I'd need to know what it entails, though - would I be traveling with you, or playing bodyguard to your father, or...?"

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"I don't travel outside the country a lot, so the traveling would be less like this. Even if the crown's not impressed with me I'll take some downtime before I pack up and set off again. You could talk to my father about bodyguarding him if you prefer, but two incidental ravelers is well within my personal budget as long as I'm generally doing things and not lounging around."

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"I'd prefer to guard someone I know," he puts forth, shyly.
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"Incidental raveling while I go princessing around it is, then."

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"Thank you. It's the least I can do, for the - rescue, and all, milady."

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"...You know you don't owe me anything, right?"

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"Not in a - 'Hey let's go fling myself under a wagon for you for no reason' way, but I sort of feel like I do?"

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"I don't want you to feel obligated, that wasn't the point, I wasn't out vassal-collecting, I was out adventurously rescuing. You are now supposed to be rescued, not indebted. The concepts are distinct."

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"Okay," he agrees. "Fair enough, I wasn't - trying to make it like that. It was more like... you rescued both me and my sister, and now I want to help you because you are the type of person to do that?"

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"Okay. That I'm on board with."

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"Good, because I'm still planning to be cross with the crown if it doesn't think this is a big enough adventure."

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"We'll see what it says. Well, we'll see what it does, more."

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He nods. "Yeah. Good luck."

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"Thank you."

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He smiles at her, then - back to being quiet. If she'd like to start a conversation, that's entirely up to her.

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She lets it be quiet for a good thirty minutes. Then: "I'm really looking forward to not-trail food."

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Adarin snickers. "How long have you been eating nothing but trail food?"

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"Weeks. We stopped to restock twice, once in a trading post sort of place in the wilds and once we dipped into Antaurb, but slightly different trail food is still trail food. Dense caloric stuff. I just want a creampuff and some fruit that hasn't been turned into leather."

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He winces. "You poor woman. I'm so sorry."

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"It's all right, my travails will be over soon."

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"And then you will have proper food again."

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"Yes. A cream puff and an apple and maybe a steak."

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Adarin laughs. "I'm imagining you with a giant plate piled with sweets."

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"We actually brought an enormous block of fudge. It keeps, it's energy dense - good raveler food - and I'm long sick of it."

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"Pffff. You know my sister packed food, right? I think a lot of it won't keep, you can help her with it?"

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"Sure, that'll be lunch."

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"And then it'll be gone in three days and it's back to trail food."

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"By then we'll be in Casasha."

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"Aha! Then you might be saved from trail food early after all."

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"Hurray."

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"You may or may not have to ply her with fudge."

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"She can have it, I'm not going to want any more fudge for about a year."

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Adarin snickers. "Then no loss."

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"Gains from trade."

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"Yes. Travel economics are delightful, aren't they?"

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"I have had economics lessons. Etiquette was distinctly - tertiary."

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"Uh huh. So what you're saying is that in polite society you would be doomed, milady."

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"I get along fine in Casasha. I would certainly misstep in Antaurb or wherever else. I don't think there are etiquette lessons to be had on behaving in the wilds."

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"Nonsense, there is an etiquette to the wilds, it's very sophisticated."

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"Oh? Tell me. I'm curious."

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"Well, you see, when you drink tea, your pinky must be out at all times. You have to organize your silverware in a very specific fashion, there is a dessert spoon and a soup spoon and a salad fork and it's all very fancy."

Pause.

"Also when you meet other travelers you cling to your weapons and threaten each other."
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"We've been going with the 'we are both ravelers, back off' whenever we met anyone who didn't look like they wanted to offer us goods and services before soliciting our money. Does that count?"

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"Hmmmm. I don't know, it's toeing the line. Did you pick your teeth with a dagger, to be sure?"

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"We skipped that part, but Kayam does a very good menacing arm-raise."

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"Nope, nope, it's not the same, you have been incredibly rude, you should be ashamed of yourself."

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"I am a disgrace to the Swanpennon legacy," says Shara solemnly.

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"You need to go to remedial etiquette, obviously."

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"Either that or just never show myself in the wilds again."

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"One of those two things, surely."

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"I don't anticipate having that many reasons to venture out this far again, anyway. The regnant crown isn't magical at all. Even the heir crown doesn't require annual maintenance adventures."

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"Ah, I see. That's a bit of a disappointment, you realize, all the work for the heir crown and then the regnant one isn't magic."

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"It's okay. It's prettier. The heir crown is all white - platinum and diamonds - the regnant and consort crowns have some color to them."

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"But it's not magic. I like magic things, in most cases except for the glaring and obvious exception."

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"Do you want to see my pocketknife?"

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"As long as that's not some kind of euphemism for something, sure!"

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"No, I have an artifice pocketknife." She produces it. "Careful with it, though. It has a knife part, but also a firestarter and a bit that undoes and redoes knots and a bit that will automatically sew small things given thread."

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"Oooooo," pronounces Adarin, fascinated. "That's useful and handy! Also really cool!"

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"Thanks! It was a sixteenth birthday present."

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"That is a really good birthday present. Go your parents. Or - whoever got it."

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"Kayam, actually, it was a 'let me accompany you on your fantastic adventures' bribe which worked very well."

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He smiles. "That was nice of her!"

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"So when her birthday rolled around I got her the horse and we went on a brief adventure hunt but found only minor things, and we've been venturing out on a roughly yearly basis since, though not into the wilds before this time - I'm nineteen now. Hopefully I can stop having rescued you."

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"Hopefully! Like I said, I will make faces at the crown if it doesn't deem you worthy."

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"I'm sure it will be very impressed."

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"If not, I put on a pretty dress, Vi puts on a dire bear costume, and you get to rescue me. Again. It'll be great."

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"There have actually been serious attempts to impress the crown that way. It doesn't work."

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Adarin bursts out laughing. "I was - that was a joke, I'm sorry, I wouldn't - I like you, you are funny and heroic, but I'm afraid I would not wear a dress for you, milady."
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"And I have no use for it even if you were so inclined. Since it wouldn't work."

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"If you say that in earshot of my sister she will make faces at you. She's been trying to persuade me to wear a dress for years."

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"...Why?"

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"Because she thinks it would be funny, I expect."

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"Again, why?"

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Adarin shrugs. "Because we both know I would look better in the dress than she would?"

He's joking.
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Shara snorts.

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"Don't tell her I said that, by the way, that'll incite her."

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"I won't say a word."

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"She would go dress shopping. It would be be terrifying."

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"I promise, I will not mention it."

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"Thank you. My dignity is saved."

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"You're welcome."

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Adarin smiles.


"Is your policy on hugs the same as it was yesterday?"
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"Yes, just the same," she confirms.

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"Okay, thanks."

Hug, and then a head on her shoulder. Gentle and snuggly as before.
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"You're welcome for that, too."

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"It's very kind of you," agrees Adarin.

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"Don't give me more credit than I deserve. Being hugged is not some kind of onerous task."

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"Shhhh, accept the praise."

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"I love praise, but only accurate praise!"

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He snickers. "All right, then. Don't accept the praise, that's fine."

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"I'm so glad."

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"Just, throwing my gratitude in my face. I see how it is," he teases.

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"I want well-calibrated gratitude!"

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"Uh huh, but it's a gift! Even if it's not well calibrated, that's against the etiquette of the wilds."

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"Oh, dear, do I have to accept any silly gratitude you give me here in these lawless strangely-etiquetted lands?"

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"Yes. Yes you do."

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"Gosh. I hope you keep it reasonable levels of inaccuracy, then."

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"I'll try my very hardest."

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"Thanks."

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"You're welcome."

Out of habit, he nuzzles her a bit. Then he freezes. "Uh - wait, sorry, that was -"
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"I'm not upset, but I wasn't expecting it," says Shara levelly.

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"Right, I am extremely sorry," he agrees. He releases her from the hug. "Sorry."

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"You don't have to - do you want to talk about the obviously complicated feelings going on behind you and hugs?"

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"Sure, uh - I'm not sure where to start, though?"

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"Is 'the beginning' by any chance a helpful answer, because if it's not then I don't know either."

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He laughs a little. "It's - I'm used to hugs and they're genuinely comforting, but - honestly I'm pretty sure that everything I know socially is incorrect."

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"But I told you it was okay to hug me, so...?"

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"Yeah. But the - I'm worried that I don't know proper boundaries and..." He sighs. "I kind of don't want to do overstep bounds?"

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"Okay - coming from the other direction, what would you be doing if circumstances were different and you were on a horse with that one huggy ex-roommate of yours and still thought you liked her of your own accord? The one Anlon told you off about?"

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"... Cuddling, probably? Non-sexually, we didn't - it wasn't like that, but it was rather..." Wince. "Intimate?"

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"I mean - concretely. Give me a list and I can tell you what's on and what's off. And then you won't be worrying about it."

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"Okay, uh - if she were here and I were - unaware of the circumstances - I would be a good deal closer. Arms around waist, head on shoulder - copious... amounts of nuzzling. Some hair petting." He winces again. "... Possibly little kisses to - neck, hair, hands. Or not. Depending on my mood."

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"Okay. Within the scope of the princess-and-rescuee relationship: kisses are off the table unless your knowledge of etiquette extends to kissing-the-hands-of-pennons and the weirdly elaborate rules around that, probably best to steer clear of nuzzling, for purely practical I-have-to-look-around-and-see-where-we're-going reasons you should leave my hair alone. You can scoot forward, you can hug me around the waist, you can put your head on me. Is that clear enough for comfort?"

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"Yes, thanks. I - had a general idea but I'm a little worried I'll - just - forget because I'm not paying attention, or - something."

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"It's fine. I get it. I'll just remind you, okay?"

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"Okay," he agrees. "- And you're entirely free to - not want me to touch you, I won't take offense or - anything, really."

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"I know. But I don't mind the listed stuff. If you want to, if it helps, go ahead."

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"All right."

He does not return to hugging, however - he will give her space, right now. Less for her benefit, and more for his. To be sure that he's capable of it.
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"Are you worried you're going to take some kind of advantage of me or are you not sure you can tell what you want anymore?"
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"It's - sort of a mix of both. I'm not sure if I can function under ordinary circumstances anymore. It doesn't help that I'm not sure what I want, either, and I - don't want to make you uncomfortable?"

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"I'm fine. I'll worry about me. I'll tell you if you need to start worrying about me, okay? You have plenty to work on without adding that in."

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"Okay." He pauses. "Tell me the instant I do something wrong?"

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"I will."

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"Thank you," he says, sincerely.

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"You're welcome." Pause. "The guidelines might change after a while when we're around people besides Kayam who pay attention to what I'm doing - a certain amount of clinging and possibly weeping is within parameters for the recently rescued, but people will probably raise eyebrows if you're hugging me a lot after a month and there has been no happy announcement."

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Adarin is briefly confused and doesn't know what sort of happy announcement she means - and then it clicks. He coughs, blushing a bit and sounding embarrassed.

"Right, uh - of course. Hopefully I'll be over it in a month so I'm not potentially putting you in an - awkward position."
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"I'll let you know if it gets to be an issue," she assures him.

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"Thank you. I'd like to try and avoid it - ever being an issue, though."

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"I'm afraid I didn't so much as get precognition as an option."

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He snickers. "Aw, you didn't? Not even a artificing artifact to let you tell the future? I am sad now."

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"Now that would be one heck of an artifice. Ocean-of-coffee pass-out-for-a-week for the peppeiest possible artificer."

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"Definitely. Add lots of sugar to the mix, too, they'd need to have a sugar rush to end all sugar rushes."

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"If only artifices weren't so draining I'd be a lot more useful."

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"Milady, I'm maybe a bit biased on arguing about your usefulness," points out Adarin. "Your specific type of magic did save me and all."

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"Yes, but it'd be a lot better if I could alter artifices! I don't just unravel things, I can edit them a little, too."

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"... Ooo that would be useful. Now I want to have experiments with my shields, do you want to have experiments with my shields?"

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"Sure, why not. Sometime when we aren't riding constantly."

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"Yeah, of course. And! Shielding doesn't eat up much energy, either. As I'm sure you noticed when you shredded my shield/"

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"I did notice that, so we should be able to run through experiments pretty briskly instead of waiting a day between each like when I was first practicing with Kayam!"

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Adarin snickers. "Aaaaand now I'm excited, what sorts of things can you change?"

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"I've never worked with a shielder before, so we'll have to poke at it for details. With Kayam I can nudge the endpoints of the folds she makes, or make them bigger or smaller - it's not efficient to do the second thing, she can do it a lot cheaper than I can, but if she's running on empty and I'm not it's good to have the option. I can unfold them, too. And if I want to be a zombie for the next two days I can add a third point to a two-point fold - she can do that without needing more than a good night's sleep, she only gets that tired if she makes something with four points or hangs onto a lesser fold for a long time."

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"That's useful, with my shields I can stretch them to be bigger or move them - I bet you could help with cleanup, I can only do one shield at a time and I have to clean up the fragments of one if it breaks before I can do another one."

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"I can probably do all that," she agrees. "You have to make them in the first place, of course."

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"Yeah - actually now I'm curious if you can put my shields back together after they break."

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"...Maybe. Is that something you can do with them or would this be a niche application of metaravelry?"

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"I can't, no. Have to make a new one. So if you can do that, that would be useful if I were - I don't know, unconscious or something."

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She nods. "We can try it. Hopefully not while you're unconscious."

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"Yeah, no, that would be uncomfortable."

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"This sounds like fun."

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"It does, doesn't it? I'm resisting the urge to start trying it while on the horse, you realize."

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"If you flop off of this horse while we've got daylight left because you were playing with magic that will be extremely silly of you."

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"That, milady, is why I'm resisting."

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"You're having fun with the 'milady' thing, aren't you."

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"I really am, it's a fun word to say!"

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"I'm pretty sure that's why Kayam uses it all the time. It's certainly not my insistence."

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"Oh, I figured. I can't blame her, I think I'll keep calling you milady, too."

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"As you like. Although if the crown doesn't like me I can get demoted within my lifetime, I will still be a pennon, so you're safe to get used to it."

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"Oh, good, it would be annoying to have lots of habits to break."

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"Lots of them?"

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"Along with the hugging thing," he points out. "And leftovers from that place in general."

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"Ah. Are there a lot of other leftovers besides being - snuggly?"

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"I - think so, but I'm not sure what they are, yet."

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"That sounds terrifying."
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"Yeah. Yeah, it is."

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"I've never seen anybody - process their thoughts the way I do, so maybe it won't help, but do you want to borrow a notebook?"

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"Not sure it would help, but I can always give it a shot. How do you process your thoughts?"

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"I write them down. And then they're not inside my head anymore - well, not exclusively - and I can look at them without them sliding around, hiding or trying to look prettier than they are or distorting themselves even further the more I turn them over in my head."

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"That's clever. Hm. Okay, I'll try that, then, that might help. Thank you."

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She pulls a blank notebook and a pen out of one of the saddlebags and hands them over. "You're welcome."

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He takes them. "Thanks."

Write. Write write write.
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Shara leaves him to it, quiet.

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"Okay," he pronounces, after a while. "I'm not sure if that helped or not but I think I have a better idea of what I'm working with, now. I'll explain, if you'd like to hear it?"
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"I'm curious, but I don't want to pry."

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"I don't mind. Uh - I think I need a crash course in 'how to social' to get a better feeling of it, but - in general, if someone touched me in just about any way right now, I don't think I would care. And I used to."

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"Do you remember the details of how you used to?"

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"Sort of, I didn't keep a list - but I've definitely got boundaries that are drawn way differently now. Not in the sense that I'll - do things to other people." Wince. "But in the sense that I wouldn't care if they did them to me."

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"Well, if you follow me around that'll at least confine things to what people are willing to do in public."
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"Yeah," he agrees. "Another good reason to travel with you."

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"I'm a little confused about how you managed to remain platonic with the entire household if you've been this - altered - but maybe that's too personal to say?"

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"... Mostly because none of them started it with me," sighs Adarin. "And it seems that it was entirely platonic feelings that were - created by magic. On my end. So that's a blessing."

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"I guess the orgies were a consequence and not a priority."

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"Apparently." He shudders. "I'm not sure how to feel about not being the orgy type even when under unethical raveling, thankful, I suppose."

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"I'm getting the impression you'd be a lot less stable right now if you'd been in them."

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"Much, much less stable."

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"Small mercy."

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"Yeah. I was definitely a cuddler, though."

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"Is that incongruous with how you were before?"

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"I - had no one to cuddle with, before, and think I would have just kept it to a - significant other if left to my own devices. But no."

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"At least you didn't have a significant other. Anyone's guess if they'd have been cut off or drawn in."

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He winces. "Yeah - another... Small mercy."

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"Exactly."

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Adarin sighs. "I feel like an idiot, you know, I'm a raveler, I should have noticed."

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"I'm the only kind of raveler with special noticing powers. It didn't look like it'd feel like anything by itself."

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"Yeah, but the - fidgeting. I thought it was just a nervous habit, like hair twirling or something."

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"And some people really have nervous habits like that, and she wasn't claiming to be a raveler and most people aren't ravelers. Why would you be suspicious?"

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"Because it would have been really convenient to be suspicious right then," points out Adarin. "But, oh well."

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"And what if you had been? She could have just - pulled harder."

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Wince. "True. That's - yeah. Ugh, there was just no way to win in that sort of situation, was there?"

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"Stab her on sight," says Shara dryly. "Which wouldn't have left you in a very good position either."

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"No, no it wouldn't have," he snorts.

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"I almost wonder why she was living out in the wilds. She was subtle enough she probably could have collected a whole town over the course of a month or two."

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"I don't think she liked being in places where people didn't - like her. She hated cities, for sure."

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"So she couldn't put up with the month or two. Got it."

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"Another small mercy," says Adarin wryly.

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"Yes. I don't think Kayam and I would have done so well getting away from a town-sized angry mob."

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"Probably not, no." Pause. "I might have been there to shield you if that were the case? I did do that to get you to explain yourself, earlier, so..."

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"Maybe. I appreciate that, by the way, I really didn't want to have to bail for safety and leave you guys confused and angry."

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He nods. "Yeah. I don't support lynching, even when under the influence of unethical magic."

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"I'm glad of it."

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"Me too, if my morals got thrown out of the window when under the influence of unethical magic, I would be a wreck right now."

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"And probably much worse for horse-sharing."

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"That, too."

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"I would not have been keen to offer you a ride if you were suddenly some kind of amoral monster."

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"I would not have faulted you for that at all," he snorts.

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"But if you were an amoral monster you might, mightn't you?"

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"Probably. But I, the person I am right now, who is not an amoral monster, would approve."

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"Aha, I see."

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He smiles at her, then gets a thoughtful look.

"Hmm. I wonder if I've lost my ability to dislike people, too. I mean, I like you, and I'm okay with Kayam, but my sample size is kind of small so it's hard to tell. Also, bias."
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"There will be more people who haven't rescued you around when we get out of the wilds. Maybe you will not like them."

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"Maybe, and then I can stop worrying about it."

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"I take it your opinion on your old roommates is - complicated."

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"Very much so," he agrees. "I'm - working on forming non-magic opinions, but it takes time."

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Shara nods.

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"I think some of them I might have liked regardless, but - so far, I don't think I would have liked Tima or Anlon in normal nonmagical circumstances. Or Chelasi, obviously."

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"Will it help to talk about why?"

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"It might, yeah. Want to hear the why?"

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"If you want to tell me."

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"Okay, well. Chelasi's obvious - she had no respect for my personal space, no respect for things I wanted to do in my spare time, and made things about her. All the time. Tima I think I'd dislike for a similar reason, she - wants what she wants and then if you're not supportive of that, she gets annoyed or upset. It's not as pronounced as Chelasi's, mind you, but it was still - she still didn't come across as someone that respected me as a person. Anlon - I don't know, I feel like he just wanted everyone to get along and worshipped Chelasi, and - that kind of disturbs me, honestly, that level of obsession."

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"How long did he know her? Like - since before she would have gotten her choices?"

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"I - suspect that's how far they went back, or she got him right when she got her choices, because he went with her when she moved to the wilds."

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"And he knew, or it seemed like it, and - yeah."

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"Yeah. So I dislike him for that, too. The argument of - being upset with you for destroying the dynamic because we were happy is -" He winces. "Flawed. Very, very flawed."

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"I can see his point. I don't agree with it, at all, but - I can see it."

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"I can see it, too. I even feel for him in mourning, he obviously loved her. But. Flawed."

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"Yeah."

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"My sister's - angry about it, but I just can't help but feel the entire situation is a tragedy."
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"You're not angry?"

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"My head's too - confusing and contradictory to let me be properly angry. I'm angry that my life got marginalized for three years, I'm angry that I don't love my father anymore, but - other than that..." He shrugs. "I think I just pity her, because she was so desperate to - be loved."

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"Yeah."

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"Besides, my sister's got enough anger in her for the both of us, I do noooot need to add to it," he snorts.

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"Oh, is that how it works?"

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"Yes, special twin thing, that's definitely how the rules of the world work."

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"And you seem to be storing all her - nervousness and disequilibrium. How fair of you."

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"Mhm, I'm a giver."

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"Just of emotional storage space, or generally?"

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"Well now I sound really arrogant," snort Adarin. "Uh - generally? I like helping people."

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"What were you going to do, when you were originally wandering around, before you found the house?"

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"Find a job in Casasha as a bodyguard for someone who wasn't a terrible human being, figure out what was wrong with things nearby and then see if they were fixable. It was kind of a - vague plan, I was in mourning."

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"No, that's fair, why would you have a really detailed plan about what to do in a country you've never visited - I think you're going to like Casasha."

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He smiles. "Oh? That's good, what do you think I'll like about it?"

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"For one thing, it's nice to be a raveler there. I think in Antaurb it's customary to pay for most forms of work by the hour, is that right? Which is kind of - the opposite of the point of raveling. Perhaps I'm oversimplifying, but at any rate that's not a firm and general standard in Casasha, you can find work getting paid for results or a salary by the month with bonuses for particular flurries of activity if that works better for you. For another, the crown means that the pennon families tend to try to raise children who would be able to come up with some reason besides 'the crown wants me to' to rescue helpless people - the crown is not impressed if you're acting by rote, is a noticeable pattern - and so I like to think we have a better class of nobility than some of our neighbors."

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"Ooo. Yeah, that does sound nicer. I suddenly like this crown system a lot more, I was vaguely approving of it and now I am completely approving."

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"Unless it doesn't care for me?"

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"Yes. In which case, I will make faces at it."

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"That might be cute."

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He snickers. "Probably, but let's hope that you don't see the faces for this particular reason, hmm?"

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"Yes. I do think it'll be impressed. When I saw that spell I wasn't even thinking about the crown."

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Adarin nods. "Thanks, I hope that's enough. I am very happy to be saved, hopefully I won't ever be in the position to be needing it again. Ever."

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"I hope so."

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"Though if it's this specific kind of thing to need saving from, I think I can catch on that it's happening and -" He winces. "React accordingly."

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"Uh, I'm not sure you can shield against more ravelers like that if they come up. And you probably shouldn't attack people for twitchy fingers. She didn't look like she had good range, though, maybe a couple feet, so - run away, get me?"

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Adarin nods. "That is much better than my plan, I'll go with that."

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"What was your plan?"

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"Ask them to stop it on pain of setting my sister on them."

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"I... don't think that would work very well. I'm pretty sure she could have, if she needed, pulled hard and fast enough on those threads she was knitting to have someone previously about to run her through catch her before she passed out from the effort."

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He nods. "Yeah, let's - go with your plan, instead, it's way better."

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"I try."

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He smiles at her.

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