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Ivan has just recently been assigned to Earth. It's very cultural. He has already explained Vor to groups of natives four separate times. Some of them seem to find it really hilarious to call him Lord Vorpatril. He doesn't mind; some of those people are girls who giggle it and bat their eyelashes. He likes it here just fine.
After he finishes with his day-job duties (separate from attending diplomatic functions to stand around and look handsome) he attempts to let himself out of the room with the comconsole and all its data to sift through, only to find that the hallway has turned into a bar.
He looks over his shoulder. The office is still normal. Which is to say there are no other exits.
Ivan goes into the bar, squinting.
middlingalong
unmarred
"I could produce all kinds of horrifying little details, but I think I'd rather spare you. You've got enough to be going on with, I'm pretty sure."
middlingalong
"I'll note to the legal folks that 'horrifying little details' are available if they need the case shored up, how about, but I'm not that eager to make you spit it out, I'll admit."
Typety typety.
Typety typety.
unmarred
"Not since I was rescued," he clarifies. "Just in general. Although actually laughing in the moment tended to summon whole new levels of hell."
unmarred
He shrugs. "Still, you rescued me, seems a poor turn to make you suffer the knowledge of exactly what you rescued me from."
middlingalong
"If you'd rather talk directly to the legal folks should they need more detail that can probably be arranged but they're harder to extract sympathy from."
middlingalong
"Well, the way it works is I learn that awful things have befallen you, and then, because I have a soul, this is distressing and I feel rather like hugging you again."
unmarred
He hugs back.
"I don't like distressing you," he says. "But I think I like sympathy. And hugs."
"I don't like distressing you," he says. "But I think I like sympathy. And hugs."
unmarred
"Oh. Okay."
It's somewhat unexpected to find that this is a normal contradiction. But anyway. Hugs.
It's somewhat unexpected to find that this is a normal contradiction. But anyway. Hugs.
middlingalong
A few days go by, and then Ivan says, "The fast-penta interviews are all finished up and our guys are talking to some Earth guys, but it's looking like the Earth guys are sufficiently convinced that we shot criminals in the defense of another - bonus points for 'family member' - and so we're safe and your erstwhile captors get whisked away to some Earth prison."
unmarred
"Where no doubt Galen eventually escapes and comes after me. That man holds grudges like cherished heirlooms."
middlingalong
"Well, they had the discourtesy not to do this within the Imperium, so we can't string them up, but I'm pretty sure I can nip him in the head with a nerve disruptor if he goes after you here, here having the legal fiction of being Barrayar."
