Sep 26, 2020 5:02 PM
Revan recruits Catienne
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"It doesn't sound like nothing. You can be a Jedi without giving up who you are. Has someone been telling you otherwise?"

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“Have you met Atris?”

Catienna puts on a cold, serious tone. “One can only show true compassion by having no emotional stake in the situation.”

She laughs, bitterly. “She wouldn’t know true compassion if it was bleeding out in front of her.”

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"Being a Force user is difficult. Care too much, and you're an emotional wreck if anything goes wrong. Care too little..." He trails off, and waves a hand expressively. And you've seen the results. "Of the two fail states, it's the more comfortable one. But I don't think it helps anything to keep trying to learn from someone you don't mesh well with, and call me crazy, but I don't think you're getting along well with her. Atris hasn't sent you to anyone else?"

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"That's...not really how things work, at least not for me.. If I had a choice, I'd probably be paired with Kavar. He's the only master who wants to fight the Mandalorians."

Catienne sighs. "I guess they want me to learn from Atris, rather than have my worst qualities amplified. I just don't see how doing nothing inspires the need to help."

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"There's some benefit to being paired with someone with a different perspective than yours—rather than just affirming everything you know, you learn to question your beliefs and see things in a different point of view.

"But that's not what's happening here. What's happening here is that you're getting into philosophical fights with your master, which is doing the exact opposite of what the point of the whole thing is. Because when people feel constantly challenged and misunderstood, they're too isolated for that kind of exchange. So they buckle down and dig in, because it's not safe to do anything else. Mentally, I mean, I don't think Atris is going to whip out her lightsaber and stab you or anything. It's just a lot to ask someone, and it's often unwelcome when it's not from a place of mutual understanding and trust."

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“Ah. The ‘t’ word. No, Atris doesn’t trust me. The only people she trusts are the ones like her. I guess her training methods must work because I’m not the first Padawan she’s trained, but...yeah. I just feel like I’m banging my head against a brick wall.” 

Catienne sighs, slumping forward with her head in her hands. “I wouldn’t put it past her to just stab me one day. Probably a lot easier than slowly blugdeoning me to death with words.”

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"I think you need a new instructor. This one clearly isn't working out for you."

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“Are you offering?”

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