Grimdarda peals
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I can borrow a Space instance or something if you don't want to deal with this.

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I want to deal with this. Where to -

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She osanwës him the place.

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And he courteously extricates himself and then pop.

 

 

The local Noldorin KIng is sitting there, quite relaxed. When his alt arrives he says to Findekáno, whatever we say aloud, don't believe it until you hear it from one of us privately, okay? I love you.

Findekáno nods.

"Hi," Maedhros says. "You scared Loki quite badly, and we're already out in my world, and she'll be happy to help avoid problems for versions of us who aren't yet. So can you just reassure her tremendously by swearing that whatever arrangement you had was wholly consensual with a reason for a creepy cover story? Then we can get to actual explanations -"

"I swear that our relationship is wholly consensual and that there's a reason for the creepy cover story." You might need to give me better openings, if she's not allowed to know.

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Loki lands close to Cam. His tail is lashing slowly.

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Better openings?

After the war he wouldn't have forgiven me. So I kept him. If your friends are going to panic -

 

And Maedhros teleports the nearest heavy object to a few feet above the King's head and lets it crash down. You're right, he says to Loki, something's wrong, and then he collapses trembling.

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"- Cam -"

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"Yeah." Cam whisks Maedhros off and goes looking for his corresponding Findekáno.

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"We have," Loki tells Maitimo, "a problem."

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"What do you want?"

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"...we have such a fundamental problem that you are trying to bribe your way out of it. Wow."

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"You really aren't giving me very much to work with, here. You're really angry about Findekáno. Understood. Not angry enough to talk to him about it, but angry enough to menace me about it. You are already aware that I've sworn never to do anything like it again, and can trivially verify how deeply I regret it and hate myself for it, so what do you want? A blow-by-blow? I am not giving you that without Findekáno's permission."

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"...What do you want?" Loki inquires of Findekáno.

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"Uh, Cam said the Tesseract could do something about malaria?"

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Loki collects all of the malarial parasites and flings them into a star. "Done. Anything else?"

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"Smallpox."

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"Done, but I think Cam will have already given you the spiel about how I probably shouldn't cleanse the entire microbiosphere, and your priorities are admirable but this is not exactly what I was getting at."

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I know him. I know how to cope with him. If you want to give me to a different one instead I'll cooperate but - I know how to keep him happy and get what I want, he knows how badly he can hurt me if he wants me walking the next day, I don't really want to learn the ropes all over again...

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This. Is not. How. It usually. Goes. I can put this one on an uninhabited planet and if you really need a Maitimo skillset for something to hold things together here there are plenty of them to go around from Space Arda and that is not going to be part of the arrangement, it is not usually like that.

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He'd do really badly on an uninhabited planet.

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Maybe I should just go get this Elspeth character, I hear she's so good at explaining things she can make Valar pleasant to talk to.

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She's lovely. What would you be getting her for?

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To explain things, I imagine, because there is some disconnect here I do not know how to bridge and the guy I usually go to for people stuff is currently very, very upset.

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Cam reappears.

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