"Ohhhhhhh. Um, I'd suggest cooking lessons, but if you want the house to burn down..." She's giggling a bit, despite herself.

"I still don't know how you burn eggs that badly! They cook fast enough that you don't have time to get distracted doing something else!" 

"Well, apparently he didn't know that!"

Lev is a little bit staring at Sasha like he's the most wonderful person in the world.

"I want to say something about typical but I have had exactly one conversation with him so actually I have no idea what is or isn't typical." He squeezes Lev's hand again. 

"It's pretty typical. He's really hot and has saved a bunch of babies from dying and as far as I can tell has no other positive qualities."

"...None? Wow. I'm. Glad I got who I did, I guess."

"I'm sure he'd be very charming if I didn't already have a policy about trusting immediately charming people." 

"That's... Probably a good policy, honestly. I'm, um, sorry that you're living with him, Lev. Here's hoping he uses eternity to develop at least one positive quality."

"Well, that, or I find someplace else to live, one or the other."

Judging by the way he's looking at Sasha he has preferences between these options!

He can continue having these preferences but Faye is absolutely not going to invite Lev to live with her! She may be bad at setting boundaries but she is not that bad at it. Sorry, Lev. She's still smiling but it's pretty clear from her body language that she also has preferences between these options.

Lev is totally not paying enough attention to Faye to pick up on this, but if he were he would think this is pretty reasonable. Faye didn't get a message from her future self telling her that Lev was okay to live with. 

He's going to have to navigate this, isn't he. "As nice as that would be, I'm not sure whatever set up the teleportation would be a fan, this place seems like it really wants us all to be monogamous with our soulmates." 

...dang, Sasha got it and Lev didn't. She's just going to have to say things out loud, like a normal adult. This sucks. "Um, you don't have to be monogamous with your soulmate if you don't want to. Though I guess I already kind of said that when I okayed you going home with Lev? That said, I'd still rather not add anyone else to the house so soon, I'm still getting used to not living alone and adding a third person doesn't seem like it would help with that."

"...What? Yeah, I haven't known Sasha for a whole day yet, that seems like a bit hasty to move in, even if my alternative is an ex-dictator."

"Yeah, sorry, I thought you were implying--wait, an ex-dictator? How the fork did he make it here? ...Why can't I say fork?"

"It censors swear words, you can swear but you have to be creative about it. Apparently it's because if you're a dictator but also you save a lot of babies from malaria the math checks out." 

"He insists he did a good job at being a dictator but I really don't want to date someone who has ever subverted democratic processes! I honestly wasn't expecting to ever have this come up as a dealbreaker."

"....Yeah, um. Wow. I guess that kind of makes sense why he got here, but... wow. You really weren't kidding when you said he had no redeeming qualities, huh? No wonder you aren't enthused about him. I wouldn't expect it to come up either, but for the record, I for one have never subverted democratic processes. Or done any other dictator-y things. No violent crimes either? I... didn't think I needed to disclaim that, I figured that it'd be taken as given since we're in heaven. Wow. That's... a lot."

"Totally violent-crime-free here!" Lev says cheerfully. "I was a perfectly ordinary psych grad student until I died because I was reading while I was walking and ran into a car."

"Also violent-crime free. I'd say crime-free but alas, I did pirate music." 

"Yeah, there's a reason I didn't say crime-free. But there's a difference between that and, like, running dictatorships, or whatever, while doing enough good that the math cancels out."

"I smoked pot and did minor acts of vandalism and had sex in public when I was in high school? My boyfriend was a bad influence."

"Yeah, I think we're all just fine here. None of us have violated human rights or killed people or anything of that nature! It's a pretty low bar, but it's still good to be comfortable in the knowledge that we all clear it."

"...I think I might've indirectly killed someone but culpability is complicated and definitely none of us have ever jailed political opponents. Or had political opponents."

"My sister probably would have had political opponents at some point so I might have had them by proxy?"