osirians
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"Just treat everyone like people and don't go 'there's a girl fighting vampires'."

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"I apologize," he says to Karen. "I didn't mean to offer an insult."

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"S'not a big deal. Just - seemed indicative of something potentially off, and we don't want you guys to go getting in trouble before you have a better sense of local norms."

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"Cool. And then if you guys are good I will go ahead and pay your bill and let you eat however much more you're gonna eat, and then I guess we'll see you guys this afternoon. Don't spend the entire day in here, and you don't need to clean up the table or anything when you're done, the waiter'll take care of it."

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"We'll see you later. Thank you."

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"Mhmm!"

You driving me to school? Also when I say that I am paying I mean that you are paying, because you are the part of this party that has money and a job.

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We could have stuck them with the bill, they have money. But he pays it. I'll drive you to school and we can go over what we know now.

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It's very impolite to invite someone somewhere and then make them pay without any warning. And yeah, sounds good.

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You're not wrong, I just don't mind being impolite to them.

They get in the car. 

Fazil does all their talking because in his world being chosen by your god gives you credibility, other people will mostly trust you and expect you're playing fairly and so on. I don't think he's in charge, exactly. Their going theory is that you're - some kind of nobility? That there's some kind of title of vampire slayer and accompanying magic, which you might be concealing or might just be in line to inherit or whatever - and I'm deferring to you for that reason and the local government will too. Not wildly far off, considering how little they have to go on. They spent a bizarre amount of time thinking about how you might magically bind your bodyguards to not - they're really really hung up on the gender thing -

They need more power to go home and they think fighting things will let them get it. I'm not sure how. 

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That is so weird. I guess I can see parts of where they're coming from? But man.

If Gary Gygax is a warlock, and if we assume he's accurately reporting on how things are in some other dimension - in D&D you gain experience by fighting things. This isn't unique to D&D, lots of video games use a system where defeating enemies gives you a certain amount of experience points and after a certain amount of experience points you level up and gain new abilities. Pokemon is like this too. I assume it's an abstraction of something realer that makes more sense, but it's possible that they do need to get into fights to gain access to more spells, somehow.

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Huh. They want to take our stuff back to their world and sell it but that seemed pretty harmless. Last night they briefly had a conversation about whether they could just stay here  - they were really enthusiastic about hot water - but they concluded they couldn't because of the women. 

They're planning to lie to us about what they're capable of but only by a little bit. Understate it so that if we try to kill them it's harder than we expect.

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I guess that's fair of them. What about women makes it impossible to stay here??

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I'm not entirely sure? - summarizing uncharitably they were generalizing from you and some foreign countries on their own planet to conclude that no one here is worth marrying or can be trusted to have their husband's children? But it was really just a throwaway couple of minutes of conversation, I could be missing something.

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Oh, I guess if you definitely wanna marry someone someday you'd probably wanna do it with someone who had the same cultural norms and stuff as you.

- I am morbidly curious what I did that means that all women here are unmarriageable but this actually doesn't matter at all and I should stop thinking about it.

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Yep. I'm gonna stop reading their minds since they're not evil or anything and they can take their stupid opinions back to the Middle Ages when they leave.

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I suppose this is the right thing to do.

Should we be looping anyone else in on the presence of our new guests? Faith, Angel, did you tell your brother -

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I told my brother. He is sad that yalls god doesn't give out undead-fighting superpowers. Probably we should catch up Faith and Angel.

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I mean, He does give out the holy water, but I guess that's less dramatic. Hopefully Faith doesn't give them a heart attack or anything.

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Serve them right.

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Maybe so.

 

Y'know the last time we were rude to someone who was trying to help they got turned into a vampire.

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I guess that is what happened. - I don't think we've been rude to these people.

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Yeah. I guess I just kinda wanna keep not being rude. But this hardly calls for keeping them from discovering the existence of Faith.

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I'll catch her and Angel up while you're at school. 

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Cool, thanks. And I can let Dennis know what's up. And then we can figure out most of what they're capable of.

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