Nodnodnod. Snuggle. Sob. 

"Sorry - I'm sorry - "

"It's not your fault - none of this is your fault - I'm so sorry, it's my fault that all of this happened to you -"

Nodnodnodnod. She keeps crying. It's okay to cry though, Hagan's safe - she's safe -

"M'scared. Can't - remember why - "

Snuggle. "It's okay, it's okay. I'm here. I love you and I'll keep you safe."

Nodnodnod. Sobbing. Snuggling.

"Should've done this sooner, probably. I was worried you'd be mad. Gods. I love you. I didn't want things to happen like this."

"Love you.

"Scared. Really really scared - "

"That makes sense! I think we probably won't lose this baby. If you want I could ask Abadar? I don't know if that'd actually be reassuring and he doesn't have prophecy but I could ask?"

" - I don't think that's what - I don't know. Can't think - "

He will just hang out and hold her.

She's going to keep sobbing for a while.

"Hurts. Everything hurts. I'm sorry for crying but it hurts - "

"Heal. - not that it ever works, stupid spell -"

"Doesn't do anything. Maybe helps the nausea a little. - everything hurts, gods - "

"We can get more people in - none of them knew what was wrong, all of them were idiots, but someone somewhere has got to know -"

More sobbing.

"Scared. 

" - you used a charm just now, right - "

"Yeah. I did. I wanted to get you to - talk to me - since we're not going to get to see each other while you're on bed rest. But we can change that, if it's what you're scared of. I don't think being scared would be good for the baby either."

"Always scared. Always always always scared. - trying to think what the charm did, it did something - it did something I didn't expect - "

"It's supposed to, uh, make people trust each other more."

" - right, okay. It - I can't think, I can never think -

" - you said you wanted something - I'm supposed to be doing something - "

" - I wanted us to get to talk? But that's not as important as - uh, I also want you to feel safe and be happy."

" - don't know how to do that. - is it - should I be doing that, I don't know how - "

"I mean, I think I have to provide that, I don't think it's a - lever you'll have or anything. I figured, once the baby comes - you'll be a good mother, you'll take good care of the baby, and then it'll be easier -"

"Will I be? I don't know if I'm - anything - "

"Well you've been through a lot. But you were a good mother to Verita under really difficult conditions and I don't think I'm worse than the Chelish secret police." He says this like he has said it to himself a lot of times. "I love you. I'm on your side. And if - and if having a marriage isn't working then once we have the baby we can - try for friends."

She starts crying really hard. She thinks there are probably multiple reasons for this, but there are so many and they're all so tangled that she can't pick them all apart.