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Abadar uses a helm of opposite alignment on Hagan and a bad time is had by all
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He overheard a conversation in a tavern once, shortly after he started running away. A man had asked his wife - for this - while she was healing from childbirth. His friends agreed he'd been an idiot. She'd feel used, devalued, neglected. Better to just hire someone. Should've paid for a healer, if he wanted her sooner. He'd listened, frozen, anxious because - there were rules here, and he didn't know them, and everyone seemed to agree that you'd insult someone terribly if you didn't know them -

Different tavern, different conversation, he eavesdropped on them obsessively for a while. Men talking about what they'd do to whores, once they could afford them. It didn't make any sense in itself but made more sense of the first one. 

- and of course the Chelish rules are something else, because of course they are, and the only problem is in his head, and he doesn't want to have it, he wants his wife, and should stop fretting and enjoy her. She likes him. She wants him. She's smiling at him because she likes him and she likes making him happy and she wants to know if he's happy, and he is, just also more other things than he was planning on. What if instead he ignores the other things and is happy and smiles at her and tells her when she does something nice and stops her once he's close because the first time he did that he didn't particularly like it -

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She still mostly has no idea what she's doing, but at least he's telling her what's good and that means she can do better, and he can hardly be very judgmental, because she's supposed to be all inexperienced and virginal, right? With her there's maybe the expectation that she's supposed to have slept with girls and at least know what she likes, but she can't reasonably know what he likes, if she hasn't done it before and he wouldn't have expected her to, so probably it's fine, even though he's doubtless had much better from other people?

And it's nice, getting to do something he likes. She can work with this. And maybe it'll be okay, this way, maybe this'll be enough to keep them with getting too frustrated about how she's, like, defective, or bad at the other thing, or whatever. Because this is nice, too.

She lifts her head when he stops her. "All right?"

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"Yeah. C'mere, kiss me -"

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She can do that. Very enthusiastically. 

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Oh good. And he can jerk himself off and not feel very complicated about anything for a little while, at least. 

" - you okay?"

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Snuggle. "Mhmm. Better than okay."

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"Oh. Good. Okay."

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She kisses his forehead. "Like it when you have good things. Really like it when I'm one of them."

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"You're the best thing I've ever had. - do you want - anything -"

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" - yeah. In a bit, though. I dunno if - I don't wanna try what we did last night again until tonight, I think. Healing took the edge off, but - didn't feel completely better until morning. So - "

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Nod. Hug.

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Snuggle.

 

"If you wanna - 'm not in a hurry, or anything, but, uh - it's supposed to be nice if you use your mouth on me, too - "

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"I can try it." Snuggle. " - not right now, I don't think, but later -"

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"Yeah. Just wanna snuggle. And maybe at some point eat breakfast.

 

"It's not - bad, or anything, right - "

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"What's not? You wanting things in bed? Pretty sure that's good."

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"Oh good. Just - have no idea what Orisians think people shouldn't ask for. And I don't wanna make you sad."

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"I think - it'll be good when we don't have to ask because we have everything figured out, but we won't get there if we don't - say things. Probably. At least, it'd take longer."

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"All right. Long as you're not going to get upset. Not without telling me, anyway."

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"I love you. I want to take good care of you and make you glad you're mine, forever. I'm - scared of more stuff than I thought I was, I think, but I want to figure them out."

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Petpet. "Okay. I'll be here to help you, then. Love you. Very much."

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"It's very convenient! I'm confused how marriages work without it."

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"Not well, surely. Maybe if you had enough of something else, if you define love very narrowly, but - it just seems like so much vulnerability to offer someone, if you can't - trust them.

"I trust you. I really really trust you."

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"I will try very hard to be worthy of it."

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Snuggle. 

"You want anything else?"

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Headshake. "- uh, guys can't - for a while - after they - not, like, all day, but it'll be a bit -"

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