Emily leans against her parent, and they put an arm around her, and the two of them sit in silence while the shadows grow, thinking heavy thoughts.

Eventually, she reaches a decision. But it's late, and today has been ... strangely exhausting, with so many decisions to make. She brushes her teeth, and gets tucked into bed, and her parent promises to pull her out of school tomorrow because magic powers are actually more important than geography.

She dreams of being powerful and special in a feminine way.

After breakfast, she curls up in a sunbeam to give her answer.

I think there would be less dramatic tension, if the powers worked by mind control. It's not really different from setting things up ahead of time — except that the characterization and worldbuilding will feel better if that kind of adjustment isn't needed, I think.

So it's good that Nullified lets beneficial effects through, because I wouldn't want to hurt anyone ... in a permanent way just for the sake of the story.

She decisively ticks the boxes next to Incomplete and Nullified, wincing when this brings her total supply of points to 82, which is such a frustrating number.

That makes sense. I'm glad you took the time to think about it and figure out which choice is right for you.

She nods, remembers the notebook can't see that, and then adds a little heart next to its last comment.

Continuing to scan down the list of drawbacks, she quickly passes over The Princess and the Pea — she has enough problems with the way things feel right now; she doesn't need to acquire more of them. Funhouse, on the other hand, requires more context. She flips back to the prior sections looking for Like a Mirror, and immediately starts feeling conflicted again.

Does this work like There's Another One?

She asks in the margin by Like a Mirror.

In the sense of not forcing me to be a deuteragonist, I mean.

Yes, although you probably have a better idea than I do about exactly how another version of you might interact with you in that sense; if you and the other you would tend to want to team up for the long term, then choosing to meet another you means you probably end up teaming up with them for the long term.

Well, that makes sense.

How would she get along with another one of herself?

Emily imagines another her opening the front door and coming into the kitchen.

"Hello, Emily," she might say.

    "Hello, Emily," she might reply.

"Nice weather we're having," she might say.

    "Really? That's what you want to talk about? Not the mysterious femininity powers or the possibility that Other Parent might have been an angel?" she might respond, starting to get into it.

"Well, I've been traveling the multiverse with my mysterious femininity powers for years now," the other Emily might explain. "So I've had a chance to get used to them. Also, Other Parent turns out to have been distantly related to almost every fantastical creature I've come across."

Emily imagines the other Emily a bit older now, clearly having grown into having a face that could launch ships.

    "So why are you here? There's no epic quest going on here," she points out.

The other Emily seats herself at the other side of the kitchen table, daintily crossing her legs. She somehow manages to sit down without awkwardly trapping her poofy skirt against the side of the chair.

"You don't think picking the powers that you'll use to become me counts as an epic quest?" the other Emily asks.

    "But you're not really here. I'm imagining this," Emily points out.

"Just because it's all in your head doesn't mean it's not real," the other Emily replies, smiling a knowing smile.

    "So you're just here to help me pick? Isn't that a bit ... time-travel-y?"

"Well, that's why you started imagining me, isn't it, to see how we'd get along?"

Emily — the real Emily, sitting alone in her kitchen — blinks, suddenly thrown from the daydream.

Other mes would be way too smug and enigmatic.

She informs the notebook, avoiding turning this into a moment of self-reflection with the ease of long practice.

Does that mean you wouldn't like to take Like A Mirror, then?

Yeah, I definitely shouldn't.

She flips back to the drawbacks, since that rules out Funhouse. Which leads to staring questioningly at Great Responsibility, trying to figure out why it's a drawback.

Will this one, like, ruin mystery plots? Or make them get unnecessarily convoluted?

Some people find it difficult to handle the kind of pressure involved in knowing when people need their help.

Oh. Yeah, that does make sense.

It's a very protagonist sort of problem to have, too, but the thing is —

Nobody depends on her except her. She's nearly eleven, and an only child. So would she step up, feeling how much people need her? Or would she crumble?

She stares across the table at where Future Emily isn't. Would she crumble?

Does It Gets Better mean that they eventually learn how to handle it? Even if it's overwhelming in the meantime?

Yes. It can change a lot about how you end up experiencing the world, but not necessarily in a bad way, if it's something you want.

I guess I would say... if you think about inviting that pressure into your life and eventually becoming able to handle it, and it feels bright and hopeful because you'd get to be someone who could handle knowing when people need your help, that's a sign that taking Great Responsibility is a good idea. If you think about it and it feels sad and scary and stressful, because you'd never get a break from knowing when people need your help, that's a sign that taking Great Responsibility is a bad idea.

That makes sense.

Emily ponders.

I think I will take it. I don't know if I'm the kind of person who could handle it yet — I've never really had the chance to find out — but I think I want to be.

That opens up the question of the followon powers, though. Helpline would let people know to pray to her, which feels ...

... weirdly natural and terribly presumptuous, at the same time.

Is— Would being prayed to

What ... are ... gods?

Like, is there a difference between something you can pray to and expect an answer, and a god?

There are a lot of answers to that question because there are a lot of worlds and some of them have specific phenomena you could reasonably call gods and some of them don't and some of them have many different phenomena united under that label. I think whether you want to consider yourself a god because people can pray to you and expect an answer is somewhat up to you, and somewhat up to what makes sense in the context of the worlds you end up spending time in.

Emily frowns. It's not the hearing prayers part that's bothering her, really. So if she can hear them without thinking of herself as a god, that sort of makes it better ...

I don't know.

I like the idea of people being able to call me for help, but I don't like the idea of 

She thinks how to phrase the thought, tapping her pen on the notebook.

I don't like the idea of being distant from things, in the way I think a god is.

Hmm, can you tell me more about what you mean by that?

It's just — there are lots of stories where gods help in indirect ways, right? Like giving the hero a blessing, or performing a miracle, or something like that. But that's ... not what I want to do. I want to be the kind of hero who gets to fight things with swords, and solve mysteries, and make friends and I don't think gods really do those things.

And even when a god acts directly it's usually either ... uh. Big or allegorical? Like turning an entire city to salt or placing the stars in the night sky.

And I know you said that it was partly a matter of what I consider myself, but I don't really think of 'praying' as a thing that normally results in women with swords busting down your door to get involved in your life?

Does that make sense?

I think I might see what you mean...

I think if you want to be someone who answers prayers by showing up with a sword to get involved with someone's life, you can do that, even though it's not usual.

It's silly how much better that makes her feel. Her life has already taken a turn for the unusual — she shouldn't need permission to keep exploring off the beaten path.

But.

It does help, the reminder that this may be her story, but it's her story, and she if she doesn't want to do things a certain way, she can just ... not do them that way.

Thank you

She writes.

That ... I feel like you're being really patient with me, and I appreciate it because otherwise this would all be a lot. More than the amount of a lot it is already, anyway.

She double-checks the wording, and then makes a check next to Helpline.

I'm a very patient notebook. I'm glad I can help!

Divine Mantle is definitely a step too far, though, so she skips past it to continue down the list.

... actually, the whole rest of this section is a definite 'no'. She doesn't want to break the heart of everyone who meets her eyes, or stop friendships, or lose a limb.

Does Green With Envy or You Ruin Them override powers that protect me, like

And then she realizes she hasn't actually put a check mark next to Iron Will yet, because she was waiting on the notebook, but now that's probably covered by Dramatic Damsel. She goes back to mark those so she doesn't forget.

the Iron Will ones? Not my own Green With Envy, but another person's, if I meet another protagonist empowered by the Spirit?

Interactions between different people empowered by the Spirit like that are generally a matter for the narrative, but those kinds of drawbacks are some of the least likely to affect someone who would normally be protected by the Spirit's power from that sort of thing, because, hmm... it's narratively appropriate that you would be an exception.

If you wanted to be affected by those drawbacks in someone else's hands, though, or thought it was more appropriate than otherwise and appropriate enough to be with the inconvenience, that's the sort of situation where you might see a different outcome. Dramatic Damsel can also lead to that sort of thing, but it's pretty cooperative as drawbacks go and wouldn't give you storylines whose effects you found inappropriate and unsatisfying when it could give you better ones instead.

Well, it's hard to argue with the answer being 'whatever is narratively appropriate'.

That's good. That the Spirit decides these things based on stories, I mean. I just wanted to check to be sure, because if there were no room for differences like that I would want to give up There's Another One.

That brings her to the appearance drawbacks, though, and she is tempted to skip that entire section on the basis that she doesn't really want to think about her appearance more, but she forces herself to take a look because otherwise she'll have to come back to them.

And ... honestly, they all sound like bad ideas. Mood Ring is tempting for a moment, but not when she thinks about what it would actually be like.

If I took Emerald Orbs, could I make my eyes flash with anger? I'm not sure whether it will come up much, but it might be nice to have the option.

Yes, it just wouldn't be as automatic as it would with Mood Ring.

That's fine, then. Having to pay attention is a small price to pay for still being able to sneak around. Emily flips past the appearance drawbacks and scans the list of 'adventure' drawbacks.

Oh! These are ... hmm.

She taps her pen on 'Selective Memory' in thought.

These memory powers drawbacks seem sort of like I haven't actually begun my story yet, and this is just setting it up to happen, which makes a lot of sense, actually. I've never read a story that started with someone choosing things like this.

Do they only affect my memory? Like, if I left a letter to my future self with Parent, and then went off on my adventure, and only read the letter when I eventually made it back to them because of Eternal Love, would that be fine? Because then I can read it in the epilogue or something, and not really have missed anything, but the story itself can start with ending up in another world, not with all these choices.

Yes, that's the sort of thing you could do. It might not necessarily work for everyone all the time, but that's because planning to send yourself a letter you can read in the epilogue doesn't come as naturally to most people.