"I mean, the reason I met you at all is not that I bumped into you at one of those enervating little esper mixers, it's that I sought you out in particular out of all the people in the world because I wanted to rehabilitate you back into dungeoneering condition, that's still in progress."

"What luck it would've been to meet you in more auspicious circumstances."

"—I mean, uh."

Haru snorts slightly. "You're not wrong. The weird alternate universe fanfiction writes itself."

"What, does it? How does the plot go?" Not that he cares. It doesn't matter. He's never going to read it. It's never going to be real he doesn't care.

"Oh, I dunno, I fistbump you at some psychic dungeon of international relevance?" Haru shrugs. "In 2029 or earlier."

"That's the premise, not the plot."

"You're right, it doesn't write itself, I was mistaken."

He opens his mouth, then closes it, then opens it again, then says, "Inserting filler words here so that you don't feel like I'm ignoring you and because every other word that I thought to say was not a word I should say probably."

"- gosh, okay, I will just have to, uh, trust your judgment there."

"I mean I don't trust my judgment just, uh, I, my old personality seems to be coming back online like I predicted it would when I was calling myself self-centered and cowardly and what my old personality does here is 'flirt' and, you know."

"Well, if you'd rather be having sex we can do that..."

"No, see, if it was the kind of flirting that led to sex I would not think it was inadvisable."

"- oh, uh."

What was that ANSWER. Jaeha knows what that answer was, that answer was 'yes you're right it really is inadvisable but I'm not quick enough on my social feet to figure out how to deflect it gracefully', Jaeha just kind of wishes it weren't that.

Kang Jaeha you are such an idiot.

"Yeah, 'oh, uh' is right. On the bright side I think I'm done with processing my notebook-catalysed revelations, at least for now." See, that's how you defuse it gracefully.

"...well, I'm glad I could help, if this has been... helpful, notwithstanding the Sparkler interruption."

"Oh, if anything that was great for my self-esteem."

"There are people who are unpleasant to be around, congratulations on not being one."

.......ouch.

"That description of it is less flattering than the one I had in my head so I'm going to use the one in my head instead."

"Sorry, please go right ahead and do that."

Jaeha is going to need to notebook his feelings for Haru into oblivion, he thinks. He knows he said he wasn't going to be having conversations that didn't actually happen out loud anymore but on the other hand this is, like, the paradigmatic conversation that doesn't happen out loud, in approximately every single human culture, and the conversation that didn't happen here was very much to the tune of yes it is a terrible idea for him to have feelings for Haru. He should not have feelings for Haru. He is stupid and dumb and it is doomed and it would be furthermore terribly unethical for—okay, it would be unethical for people who aren't Jaeha, admittedly, but how does he convince anyone of that, he doesn't, because Haru isn't interested, and even if Haru were interested it is impossible, anyone else looking at it would just decide that actually Haru's judgment was obviously compromised and then Jaeha would be back in prison and that would help literally no one.

Say words, dumbass.

"So, what say you we take our clothes off and go deal with your and my backlashes and then have dinner?"

Haru kisses him. And then takes off his shirt. "That's what I say to that."