Feb 18, 2020 8:52 AM
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"Hi. Did I just unleash the apocalypse, please tell me I did not just unleash the apocalypse."

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"Hmm?"

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"I opened the book, cards went flying everywhere, I tried to shut the book as quickly as I could but some of them definitely went through some walls to, do - cardy things. What is going on?!"

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"What?!"

He lands, and the book stands up all on its own. Belt: gone. Book: open. Inside it are two cards, Windy and another one, which the winged bear takes to look at. They're taller than he is, but he can hold them anyway.

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"... I kept two from getting away?" she attempts, lamely. Then she sighs and rubs the bridge of her nose. "So, I did just cause an apocalypse...?"

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He turns around, sighs, and sits down. "When the Seal on the Clow Cards is broken, a catastrophe will befall this world. Those cards were special cards made by an amazing sorcerer named Clow Reed. Each card is alive, and possesses incredible powers, but they all like acting on their own, and normal forces are no match for them. So, Reed himself created this book and placed me, the Beast of the Seal, on its front cover."

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"So. That's a yes." She also sits, shivering a little. ".... Why the fuck was the lock on the cover faulty, why were there zero warnings, why was it in my family's library you do not let apocalypse cards into personal libraries where is this Reed I will find him I have issues with his apocalypse card protection technique!" Pause. "And how can I stop the apocalypse?!"

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"It wasn't faulty. It could only open to someone with magical power. And anyway, normally the cards shouldn't scatter like that... Did you do something to them?"

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"I, I, read the title of one of them out loud, made a snarky comment about the naming scheme...?"

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He looks at the two cards, then points at Windy. "That one?"

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"Yes? It was the first one, why would you put the one with the 'cause the apocalypse if you read it out loud' clause first, why not instead a long list of instructions about how the fuck any of this works and can I stop the apocalypse or not?!"

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"Yes, you can stop it. You'll need to capture all the other fifty-two cards. Here, what's your name?"

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"Yvette. How do I capture the cards, you said they were alive, is this weird card based slavery, are they going to destroy the world because some sorcerer enslaved them?!"

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"...what? No, they were created by Clow, and they aren't slaves."

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"You can still be a slave to something that created you!" hisses Yvette hotly. "My parents do not have the rights to do whatever they'd like with me just because they decided that they wanted a second child!"

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"Yes, but they're Clow Cards not humans."

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"Okay but how smart are they, how okay are they with this situation of being stuck in a book until some idiot picks it up and reads two words and unleashes chaos, why the hell did a sorcerer decide to make living things to be his, magic objects of the apocalypse, why would he make magic objects of the apocalypse?!"

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"They're not magic objects of the apocalypse and that's not how they work..."

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"Then why can they cause the apocalypse if you say the wrong two words that are the first fucking words in the book?!" she shrieks.

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"Because they're magic. Windy scattered them when you used it, and they are themselves."

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"Your safety measures are absolutely shit, being magic is not an appropriate barrier for unlocking entry, that's not some kind of, of, character test, it's not some kind of test of knowledge of how not to scatter cards that are themselves! When the themselves they are involve causing the apocalypse-!!"

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(Somewhere downstairs, a door opens, but everyone present might be forgiven for not noticing. What with the shrieking.)

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"They weren't supposed to ever be unlocked, and I was guarding them, but I... fell asleep."

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"YOU FELL ASLEEP WHILE GUARDING THE APOCALYPSE CARDS, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU WHY WOULD YOU EVER LET YOUR FUCKING GUARD DOWN WHEN THEY CAN BE SCATTERED BY A CURIOUS FOURTEEN YEAR OLD READING THE WRONG FUCKING WORDS!"

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Welp.

Blair sees how fast he can get up some stairs to see why his sister is shrieking. Turns out: pretty fast. Taking stairs three at a time will do that. The door's already open, he does not need to literally break down a door to get to his sister. Luckily for the door.

He takes in the scene in half a heart beat, barely even pausing in his glance at the bear-thing before focusing on his sister.

"Yvette, what-?"

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