"All right," says Ligaya. "So, Vanda Nossëo is a group of a lot of different nations on many planets in many worlds, and we, along with our sister polities Mîr and Elendil, seek the flourishing of sapients everywhere, and we've just discovered this world and want to invite you to partake in some of the flourishing, whether you join Vanda Nossëo yourselves or not."

"And what do you want in exchange for that?"

"Not much! Usually we set up shops and then sell all the merchandise, including tokens you can exchange for a ride to elsewhere in the multiverse, in exchange for stories, true or not, or songs or other cultural tidbits; it helps us get a sense of a culture that we're inevitably changing just by showing up. If you do want to join for basic income and defensive alliance support, there are some minimal requirements - majority vote, some basic laws most people already have if not necessarily applied uniformly."

Nie Huaisang is thinking about how he knows lots of songs and these are really very convenient immortals when he hears the words 'defensive alliance support' and everything else is driven clear out of his brain. 

The immortals from the stars are going to want to kill their enemies, obviously, man and woman and child alike put to the sword. But they are clearly very powerful immortals. They'd have no use for him in war any more than Lan Wangji would have use for a peasant. And what that means is that any wars which happen in the future don't have Nie Huaisang as a combatant.

What they want from him is a useful figurehead who'll do what they say. If they give him art and music and lovers and good wine, they'll have one. And if they don't...

Well. Nie Huaisang has destroyed people more powerful than him before. 

None of this shows on his face as he says, excitedly, "Merchandise? What are you selling?"

"Depends on the planet! Typically popular stuff includes the translation magic we're using, healing, exotic food, smokeless light and heat devices, contraceptives, sometimes things like Escan's menagerie there -" Ligaya indicates the little golems and pets of various shapes that Escan has perched on her and crouched at her feet. "But if this planet mostly wants, oh, children's toys and gardening implements, I can get you those too."

...contraceptives. He wants contraceptives very badly.

A strong cultivator can prevent himself from having children if he doesn't want to. Nie Huaisang has never been a strong cultivator. He knows he is too soft-hearted not to take in a bastard, and his bastard would of course cultivate the saber, and he doesn't want anyone else he loves to die.

He could marry, if there were contraceptives more reliable than the herbs the peasants used. He could marry, and plead infertility, and not have to watch his children die before he does--

"I imagine the peasants would want gardening implements, they certainly do enough of it. --I can't imagine what need we'd have for translation, if the barbarians want to say something to civilized people they can just learn Chinese. Cultivators can heal more-or-less anything not inflicted by a monster or a cultivator. But we'd like food and contraceptives and your little menagerie, I think, and art and poetry and music and weapons and the lore of other cultures. I suppose poetry doesn't translate, although I don't know if the translation magic handles scansion."

"Actually, Chinese is a multiversally common language," Sai Ding remarks, "this planet is one of a type that's common, Earths, and most Earths have a China, though there will be some divergences. So you can enjoy the poetry from some other worlds even if you don't want translation magic."

"We generally don't stock weapons," says Ligaya, "though I guess you could make a good case for an exception if people are mostly interested in them for fighting the undead."

"If I were a religious man I would have some kind of comment about Heaven about the number of Chinas, but I never paid any attention in cultivation class. --I imagine people would primarily want them for hunting the undead and cultivation conferences and so on?"

Jin Guangyao would have loved planning a cultivation conference for interstellar visitors. He is so very, very tired.

"Then we might stock them here, although none of ours will be particularly suited to cultivators, since those only exist here so far."

He calculates. Appearing decisive is a cost... but if he can appear impulsive and concerned with luxury over political advantage, twenty-two powers behind the throne will roll their eyes and none will consider their positions threatened until Nie Huaisang is securely the patsy of the only power that's going to matter anymore.

"Well, what are we waiting for? I will call for some servants and they can begin building immediately."

"That won't be necessary! Tuturio here can put up the building in a few seconds, as long as we've got a space for it!" Ligaya says cheerfully; the woman with the butterscotch-yellow hair waves. "Same with a bus stop for people who want to go check out the multiverse, though that wants a bit more room."

That was a good decision! Also, he wants to spend the next six hours under a blanket in his bedroom!

"Do you have a design that works well with the architecture?"

"I can make it match!" says Tuturio.

"Excellent! Let's find a good spot--"

He will locate a spot that is neither a training field nor home to restless saber spirits.

And Tuturio puts up a cute matching little storefront in about six seconds by magic.

FUCK. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

That is not a safe emotion for Present Nie Huaisang! Future Nie Huaisang can go sob into his blanket about how everything is terrifying and overwhelming and all he wants to do is paint fans. Present Nie Huaisang is too stupid to notice implications. 

"Can I buy something?"

"Of course!" Ligaya chirps, while Sai Ding nips up to the ship to collect a Bag of Holding full of inventory to unload. "What should we unpack first?" (Boxes larger than the bag start emerging from the bag.)

"I collect fans! I would love to own a fan from a different world!"

"Hmm, I don't know if we specifically have a fan in the standard inventory..." says Tuturio, scanning box labels.

"We have the little handheld electric ones, but they're not really collectible art pieces," says Ligaya, but she opens a box labeled in Not Chinese and pulls out a tiny bladeless fan in black and cyan. She turns it on demonstratively. "Like so?"

o.O

"How does that work? No one is moving it! I can't sense any energy!"