He laughs.

"...Also you're, what, six, I have not actually met anyone who was turned at age six before and haven't fully considered the eventuality, although you definitely don't trigger the 'that is a first grader' protective instincts."

"As far as I can tell, whatever lingering effects my bizarre childhood has had, they don't add up to me being effectively a six-year-old in any relevant practical sense."

"Because murdering adults to placate asshole Watchers is so much better. No, I really do not care to kill you, although I'll be honest that having a gadget with which to do it is very comforting to the parts of my brain which still think you're planning to kill me."

"So what's the plan, then? Wait, regain strength, break down door, confront asshole Watcher...? Hope he isn't carrying anything more aggressive than his peacefully administered Slayer-depowering potion?"

"He didn't sell the magic teacher act with anything more impressive than a hunk of rock he had me staring at as a 'focusing exercise'. When I'm up to normal I can take an asshole with a gun if I have to."

"On the other hand, being a Watcher, he must know that. And I can't imagine the idea that you might object to this farce is totally foreign to them, so it's not implausible that he could have come prepared to handle an angry victorious Slayer. I can't comment on exactly how likely it is, because the Watcher's Council sure does seem to be a pack of fucking fools sometimes."

"It's possible he has something else up his sleeve, but they couldn't routinely use this strategy if it resulted in Slayers they had to control by force on a regular basis."

"On the other hand, turning into a Slayer they have to control by force could be among the standard ways to fail the test. We're not going to collect statistics on how many live, how many die, and how many get enormously pissed off from inside this abandoned house."

"It would also slightly strain credulity if it resulted in Slayers they had to kill after putting them on their guard. But you do have a point."

"How applicable of a resource is your previously mentioned father who is a cop?"

"Pretty applicable. Do you have a phone? He took mine with the rest of what was in my bag."

"I do not."

"If I'm missing long enough, he'll worry, even look for me, but he won't necessarily find me soon, especially since he doesn't necessarily want to bring everybody in on a hunt that could end neck-deep in demon ichor."

"And I could sneak out to find a payphone - I wouldn't put it past them to be watching the place, but I doubt they're watching it flawlessly - but I am not fully confident in the effectiveness and security of the 'call 911 and drop your name' plan for letting your father know your whereabouts. Hm."

"It'd probably get to him, but rapidity is not guaranteed. Aaaand I can't even send you to my house - Charlie wouldn't invite you in but you'd get fried by the porch lights. Do you have quarters to just call his house, because I don't."

"I'm sure I can get my hands on a quarter without killing anyone. Less sure I can do it very quickly. Can I not approach your house from some non-porch-light-involving direction? I suppose that would impact my credibility from his perspective."

"It would definitely impact your credibility. Like, a lot. I can't even tell you something a random vampire wouldn't know because that just shifts him from thinking you're winding him up to thinking you're tormenting me in some cobwebby basement of the kind so popular among vampires. Nothing to write a note with to demonstrate the nonshakiness of my handwriting - if my handwriting would even be nonshaky now - maybe you could get Giles, determine if he was in on it, and if he wasn't, bring him to talk to my dad? Eenh. And then what if he was on it, or if he wasn't and is therefore on a plane to England right now, or if he won't believe you and knows enough magic to make him more dangerous than Charlie's sidearm..."

"It's not strictly necessary for your father to think I'm on your side as long as whatever he thinks gets him here quickly," Sherlock points out. "You can straighten out any confusion after the fact."

"I'm aware that we're only putting this much effort into letting you survive this experience because I don't happen to like murder, but he might be able to hurt you, at least a little. Spare holy water balloons and such."

"I honestly don't expect to care."

She eyes the mark on his hand. "If you say so. ...Christ, I wonder what the bastard thinks I'm even doing in here, if he is staking the place out. How were you cooped up, was it timed or what?"

"Heavily sedated and dumped in the basement."

"What if you'd woken up before I did?" she wonders disgustedly.

"I'm sure they were watching the timing, but yes, we've established that their care for your safety is low."