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"Cool," he says agreeably.

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"How's the painkiller behaving?" Cam inquires of Matilda.

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"I haven't tried anything yet," she says absently. "Still learning."

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He lets her be.

When he's out of ideas on the rice, he goes and puts it in the back yard and pours water on it and sternly instructs it to grow.
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The rice sprouts obediently.

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Good rice.

It'll take a while to get longer term data on how tasty it is, of course. He goes in and works with the next most cooperative item, a grain of quinoa that Renée bought as a form of protein for vegetarian experimentation, and gives it a similar treatment.
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Jellybean is still improving his potato.

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Exciting Tedious Wizard Science goes on until there is a row of nine sprouts of various things trying their darndest to grow in the sand.

It is now time for Cam to win a million bucks. His original form got a positive reply.

"Matilda, are you coming too?"
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"Sure," she says cheerfully.

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Off they go to the worldgate locus. "If we can't find one on the other end, we can just gate from anywhere and be dead tired after, right?" Cam confirms before setting up the gate.

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"Yeah," says Jellybean, "but we've never had to emergency-gate from Earth."

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"Yeah, not expecting it, just would rather be dead tired than a thousand dollars in the hole if something happens and I need a last-minute plane ticket. Invisibility time."

Invisibility: check!

Gate setup is a go!

Is that the office of James Randi? Well, there's James Randi, anyway.

Cam steps through.
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Jellybean and Matilda both follow, likewise concealed.

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Cam clears his throat.

"Hi, Mr. Randi, I don't know if you answer your own email or not but I'm here for my million dollars," says Cam.

Mr. Randi blinks slowly.
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(Jellybean giggles behind impromptu soundproofing.)

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"Mr...?" says Randi, slow and uncertain.

"My application's under Nick Carter, but full disclosure, not my real name," says Cam. "Oh, and I don't have a bank account, for reasons of my own, so if you can't give the first payment in non-check form I'll just have to skip that one, and I'd like the rest liquidated in cash, and the agreed-upon test was that I'd make some plant seeds of your own provision sprout instantly by talking to them, do you have those ready or do you want me to wait while you send somebody to the garden store?"

"Mr. Carter, are you invisible?"

"Yes," says Cam dryly. "Yes, I am invisible, and I teleported here, but isn't the point that we do an agreed-upon test under controlled conditions, not that I just show up and wow you?"

"...Ye-e-es."
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(Jellybean, mutually visible to both of the other wizards in the room, is now cackling silently.)

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"...I will send someone to the garden store, Mr. Carter," says Mr. Randi slowly.

He does not sound thrilled.

"If you want to see some other stuff, to make up for the fact that you're going to have to give me a million dollars and the fact that I've got other things to do than loiter here being researched," says Cam, "I don't object to passing the time."

"What can you do?"

"Lots of stuff," says Cam brightly. "But not manufacture a million dollars out of thin air, which is why I'm here."
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Jellybean claps his hands, also silently. Even Matilda is grinning.

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Mr. Randi gets someone on the phone. He sends them to the garden store.

"Why so secretive, Mr. Carter?" he asks, after the phone call has concluded.

"I'm not omnipotent, teleporting is kinda hard, and I'm really not interested in a career as a lab rat," says Cam. "I don't think you personally would be cutting me up, but I'd rather your friends and colleagues not be able to find me at home."

"Why no bank account?"

"For," Cam repeats, "reasons of my own."
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Now it's Matilda's turn to soundproof her giggles.

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"What sorts of things could you do with what's in this room?" Randi wants to know.

"Well, I'm still learning, but I can look up any specific effects that interest you."

"So the... magic... you're claiming is in a book."

"I don't really want to go into too much detail, Mr. Randi. There's a reason I'm being invisible and so on."

"I see." Pause. "Can you fix my computer?"

"That's a probably!" says Cam, flicking his manual and turning pages.
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Jellybean holds up a hand in an I-got-this gesture and heads for the computer in question. Matilda follows. They talk to it in a way audible to no one but themselves and the computer.

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"In progress," Cam reports. This will have the convenient effect of not disclosing to Randi that all spellcasting involves talking to stuff.

"...I don't need to tell you what's wrong with it?"

"Nope, not really," says Cam.
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After about thirty more seconds, Matilda gives the thumbs-up.

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