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"I might go with the latter one, that's a good idea. Trying to find someone on the internet with criteria like that...I'm not sure how I'd go about it."

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"You'd have to be prepared to filter. Heavily."

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"...Doing it personally sounds like an exercise in anger management techniques, but maybe I could hire a magical girl groupie or something to do it."

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"Do you get a lot of those?"

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"Personally, not a whole lot, but I'm public enough about my goals and opinions to have a niche following of mostly tumblr social justice warriors. The trick would be finding one who would not also find the task an exercise in anger management techniques."

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"I'm not sure anyone describable as a 'social justice warrior' will match that description."

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"Yeah. It is only mostly, thankfully, but."

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"What's tumblr?"

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"...It's a website. For blogging, mostly. And you can 'reblog' someone else's post to your own blog and add a comment and add tags and there's a bunch of cultural baggage to go with it."

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"Enh, it's not bad. Not, like, bad cultural baggage, I just mean that I don't think I can explain the whole thing without more time than I suspect either of us care to allocate to the project."

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"All right."

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"Um," says the other one. "What's the internet?"

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"What year are you from?"
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"Nineteen-eighty."

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"So, the internet is when computers get really cheap and popular and can call each other on the phone only better. So if you assemble some information or write a story or take pictures or whatever you can put them on a computer and all the other computers can get ahold of it at any time. It is even cooler than it sounds."

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"Oh. That does sound pretty cool."

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"It's great. I'm sure it gets even better, only I'm stuck in early 2005 till I figure out how to save the world."

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"Well, we might not get it at all, considering. Maybe if things ever settle down."

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"What happened?"

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"...Okay, so I'm a mutant. Most mutants aren't telepaths, but we usually have powers of some kind. A rogue faction of the government got scared enough of us to develop murder robots, kidnap my shapeshifter aunt to--augment their adaptability somehow, I don't know--and decide to wipe us out, and incidentally conquer the country since otherwise they'd be fugitives for mass murder. Things...sort of escalated from there."

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"Did it snowball to other countries too?"

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"I don't know. It hadn't as of three years ago, but I haven't had access to consistent enough communications since then to know if that's still the case."

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"I'd teach you to stow away on an airplane but I rely heavily on my ability to stop time to do that."

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"What good would that do?"

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