Kib in Arda
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...well, the Charps are against it. ...the Noldor are against it and the Charps are against it by proxy.

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The King of humans thinks the war is regrettably necessary, and that Melkor supports it.

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Regrettably necessary because?

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The Elves terrorize anyone who enters their forest, and there are ghouls and monsters in the forest, so to be safe from the ghouls and monsters who attack their camp at night the humans need to enter the forest.

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...the Charps would be happy (...Kib would be happy to send the Charps) to go complain at the Elves about that in case the situation can be resolved sans war.

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When the Charps enter the forest it fills with eerie wailing (and illusions, but the Charps won't see that.)

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The Charps would like to talk to the Elves here please.

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Eventually an Elf appears within the Charp's visual range. "You are not welcome here. Leave."

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"I have a message," says the Charp. "It is very important."

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"We are listening."

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And the Charp explains the forest monsters situation, that its masters do not think the Elves here are responsible but it's agitating the humans and probably serving the Enemy's purpose and the Elves being unwilling to talk to the humans is exacerbating the situation. (It does not mention up front that the humans are about to go to war about it.)

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And the Elves say that there aren't any monsters, just Gorthaur's illusions, the Men are just stupid and gullible.

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The Charp does not come stocked with quippy retorts so it does not ask how smart they were when they were a few years old. It says that it would be happy to convey a message to the humans but thinks that in the long run everyone will be better served if the Elves will talk to them directly. The Charp is willing to translate.

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"We are willing to speak to the Men."

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Lovely. The Charp goes and tells the Men that.

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The Men are wary of the forest because monsters, but they'll go up to the edge.

 

The Elves tell them they are stupid and gullible.

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The Charp is, unfortunately, a golem and not a diplomat.

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The Men accuse the Elves of being the monsters.

The Elves announce that anything, Man or monster, who sets foot in their forest dies.

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The Charp interjects that its masters would disapprove of this outcome, but continues to faithfully translate.

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What are the Charp's masters going to do about it?

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It will have to write them and ask.

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The Elves and Men trade more insults and threats.

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The Charp continues to be too much of a golem to panic and say anything particularly useful.

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And the Elves retreat to their forest.

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And the Charp writes to its masters and the courier takes the letter home and Kib says "Fucking hell that went badly."

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