Jan 18, 2021 6:10 PM
spike makes a wish and everyone ends up in 1860s london
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So the problem with beating up vampires for information is that Karen is actually really really bad at this. She's obligated to kill vampires she runs into, since they're definitely going to kill again and she can't contain them in this time period. This means the only ways she can incentivize vampires to give her information are to, one, lie about whether she's going to let them go, or two, make continuing to live so unpleasant for them that they give her information just for the privilege of dying. The first is unlikely to work, since she's never any good at lying about things if she's at all conflicted about them. The second is... differently problematic.

She does find a vampire on the prowl. She doesn't try questioning him. She beats his head in with a handy blunt object, strips him of clothing and valuables, plunges a stake through his heart, asks around until she finds a pawn shop, and sells his pocket watch. In the morning she buys herself some bread. She really isn't sure what to do about the investigation problem, though, so at that point she heads back to where Tyelcormo's hanging out.

 

So I have this problem.

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He has more arrows. Oh?

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So like, I can't actually let vampires go, if I catch them. There are circumstances under which I could, but I don't think I can get all of London's vampires to reform no matter how much I threaten them, not with no way of determining which vampires are still killing people. Which means the only way I could plausibly get them to give me information by threatening violence is to torture them so badly that they tell me stuff purely because they want me to skip to the killing them.

I think this is probably, like, evil? And I think even if it weren't I would be..... bad at it.

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.... uh huh.

 

So it was my job?

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No, in the future we have a facility to keep them contained in and we can actually let them live. We're working on this implant that'll make them unable to hurt people even if we let them go about their other business outside. And also when you want to torture people for information you say something like 'no Catholics allowed' and then drive off without giving me the chance to discuss whether I have ethical objections to this plan.

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I think I'm not in fact up for doing anything complicated around reducing your culpability for whatever it is you think we should be doing.

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Nah, making other people do bad things for you is worse than doing them yourself. I think that if I think it should be done then I should do it. I just, uh, also think I'm gonna suck at it, if I decide to. And I'm not sure whether there are maybe better options anyway.

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You could offer them a head start?

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That's - really not a solution for any of the elements of this problem, I don't think.

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I don't know very much about vampires. Why doesn't that work, they wouldn't believe you? They wouldn't cooperate even if they believed you? They'd get away?

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They probably wouldn't get away, but they might, and then it'd be my fault if they killed more people. Also I think I'm maybe kind of really bad at threatening people in the first place. 

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...okay...do you want to practice?

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She sighs heavily and sits down on the ground. 

'M sorry. There probably aren't solutions I'm going to like.

 

I should probably go to the council. They're the only findable people who might know about Angelus and be willing to provide intel on him without it involving - this.

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But they want to kill you? Look, I don't know about torturing vampires but I wouldn't mind talking to one to check if this is as unsolvable as it feels like before you go ....infiltrating a secret organization of child murderers.

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That would be helpful, yeah.

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I can also do tips on threatening people, that seems like a good skill to pick up in general.

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Yeah. Probably. Maybe when I'm not as - sad as I am.

I can get you a vampire with enough head trauma that it's down for the count for a bit, then carry it out of the city. We'd have to be able to contain it.

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I don't know enough about vampires to know what contains 'em.

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Solid stone or metal walls. Sufficient quantities of rope. Shade, in daylight, but only if they don't have anything to shield themselves with if they make a break for it. I guess we'd need shade anyway.

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Shade's the only one of those I can think how to get, offhand.

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Shade works. Provided there isn't an escape route. We could make something that worked. It'd have to be enough shade, I don't have a fantastic sense of how much sunlight it takes for them to end up on fire.

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Well, if the first one catches fire then we make it shadier and try again, yeah?

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- yeah. OK.

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Have fun out there.

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All right. Any idea how long it'll take you to have something set up?

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