This post has the following content warnings:
to thine own elf be true
+ Show First Post
Total: 208
Posts Per Page:
Permalink

"Every year a group of people on the internet host an event where writers sign up to exchange stories as Christmas presents; the event is called Yuletide. I'm fond of it." 

Permalink

"That sounds nice. Full of the Christmas spirit."

Permalink

"It's pretty great. 

Other than that — I don't know. The lights are nice when people don't go too crazy with them." 

Permalink

"Maybe you'll just get people to write stories for each other and for children. That sounds nice."

Permalink

"That'd be good." 

(Squeeze the stuffed rabbit. Thank you stuffed rabbit.) 

Permalink

"I can... leave you alone for a bit? The house should have everything you need." He stands up and points to some buttons on the wall. "You press this one to get me, this one to get your cook, and this one to get housekeeping. Housekeeping can also handle any other kinds of routine life things you need."

Permalink

Nodnod. (He is really not used to being the sort of person who has housekeeping and a cook.) "Thank you. And goodnight." 

Permalink

"Good night."

Oh fuck oh fuck he fucked it up--

Permalink

Probably Sasha should go and make himself food but right now he does not super want to interact with kitchens, like, as a concept. If he still feels that way tomorrow he will..... take an action about it probably. 

Tonight, he has an entire bed all to himself (!!!!!!!!) and it's very soft and has multiple soft heavy blankets and he is going to hug this stuffed rabbit and see if he remembers how to sleep alone. It doesn't take long; it has been the longest fucking day. 

Permalink

Lev tells the cook not to make Santa breakfast unless he asks, tells the current bedwarmer that her services will probably not be required ever again and he's reassigning her to toymaking, and announces to everyone that all of Old Santa's policies are staying in place until further notice.

Permalink

In the morning, Sasha can sleep in as late as he wants. No one will disturb him.

Permalink

He sleeps in until 11 am and gets up and explores his house and — turns out to not want to spend time in the kitchen; turns out to not want to interact with having a cook; makes himself microwave hot chocolate and then leaves — and looks at the spines of books and then pushes the button for Lev, on the basis that he should probably at least attempt to do his job. 

Permalink

Pop.

"I was not really expecting to get called for another couple days."

Permalink

"It's been a while since I didn't have work of some sort and I'm putting off figuring out what to do with myself," he says, maybe a little bit too honestly. 

Permalink

"Well, an advertising executive is fighting with his bosses about whether Pretty Dark-Haired Santa Claus should kiss a boy in their advertisements, so at least we know one thing that's going to change."

Permalink

"...never thought I'd root for an advertising executive. Seeing ads around Christmas is going to be incredibly weird from now on, isn't it." 

Permalink

"At least it'll take a couple of years for you Santa to replace the last Santa."

Permalink

"So existing Santa-related things don't get overwritten? That's good. I think." He sort of wonders what a little kid watching the Rise of the Guardians movie in ten years will think of it. Speaking of which, "Are there things like this for other holidays, is there actually an Easter Bunny out there?" 

Permalink

"Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, the Sandman, Death, leprechauns, the Bogeyman, Jack Frost, Mother Nature, Father Time, Krampus, and Jack O'Lantern."

Permalink

"...are they all doing the mind control thing. Speaking of which I do not plan on doing the mind control thing unless there was a really good reason for it so you should tell me if there was." 

Permalink

"Tooth Fairy is, the rest are less obvious in their effects."

Permalink

"....I'm not going to speculate about why the Tooth Fairy is doing that. Did the previous santa have any other policies I should make actual choices about whether I'm continuing."

Permalink

"I took the liberty of reassigning the elf who was the old Santa's sex slave to toymaking duties."

Permalink

....

.......

.....

Permalink

"...I shouldn't actually be surprised. Thank you." 

Total: 208
Posts Per Page: