Papa goes to go talk to Dad. (She's not really listening.)

"Dave, I think there's something wrong."

       "You mean be-"

"Yes, I mean besides the broken arm. And her poor knee, and the other scrapes. She's - she looked so confused when I was talking about her broken arm. It was like I was speaking another language."

        He frowns. "We checked her for head injuries..."

"And I just did another check, and I asked her if her head was hurting (it's not), and if she could tell her arm was hurting (she can). It's weird, Dave. It's weird, and I don't like it all."

        "I don't either, love. But we'll get through it. Go sit with her, I'll be right there. Soup's almost ready."

Soup!!! She reaches out to grab the spoon and OWOWOWOWOW

      "Kankan, [??¿¿]! Eat with your left hand, okay?"

She whimpers. She doesn't understand, but - she can try and eat with her left hand? For mysterious reasons?

Eating with your left hand SUCKS. It's slow and it's clumsy and she's in SO MUCH PAIN. Why is she doing this? She should just - OWOWOWOW

Wow, Pete was right, that is really concerning! He's really concerned!

 "Kanikins... can you do me a big favor? Can you try really hard not to move your right arm at all? For me? Tell you what -  I'll make you a quad batch of pesto tomorrow, and handle all the cleaning. Just give this a try for me."

This is a confusing request and Kani is already very confused and distressed! 

On the other hand. A quad batch of pesto. And she doesn't have to clean the blender or bowls... 

She nods, hesitantly, and continues the miserable task of trying to eat soup with her left hand. It's for a good cause.

Then, it's - time to go to the hospital, because of [??¿¿]. (And because of the pain, but the thing they keep coming back to is [??¿¿].)

She can't even tell if they mean the same thing each time when they say [??¿¿]. It's hard to think about, and she's tired of trying. They're going to the hospital for stupid horrible reasons. Stupid horrible things will happen to her there, probably, and it'll be scary and confusing and overwhelming. She can microdose on Thrana's teenage life experience! What a beautiful tribute -

Mercifully, they pick up on the way she gets more stressed / agitated / confused whenever they bring up her broken arm, and privately agree to stop mentioning it. They pack into their old station wagon, with Papa sitting in the back seat with Kani.

The hospital is about an hour's drive away. They pick up where they left off on the Small Gods audiobook, which serves as a merciful distraction for at least some of their worries.

When they get there, Dad goes in ahead to talk to the staff at the front desk. (He tries to tell them to not mention the broken arm while treating it. They do not really seem to understand why this would be necessary, so he's not hopeful about them actually doing it.)

She's in pain and confused and scared, and the moment she steps into the hospital her brain helpfully reminds her of all the times she was here to -

She clings to Papa, only using her left hand because she told Dad she'd try not to use her other arm.

They take her to a waiting room. A nurse comes in and looks her over, his face gentle with concern.

"Oh no, you poor thing! How did [??¿¿]?"

GOOD FUCKING QUESTION, she thinks with a mental snarl, but it doesn't reach her face.

"We're not exactly sure, but we think it happened while she was hiking", he mutters, noticing the way Kani shifts uncomfortably at the question and then again when he says "it happened".

...Maybe she's having some kind of trauma response? They did so much reading about PTSD, after what happened with Thrana, and he knows that sometimes people suppress memories. As best any of them can tell, that certainly hasn't been Kani's problem with the death of her friend though he wishes it was, it couldn't be worse for her than what she's been going through, but people can and often do respond differently to different kinds of trauma, and little Kankan's never been injured like this before...

He gently rubs his thumb along the back of his daughter's good hand, and worries.

She could try and pay attention to what's going on, maybe clear up some of the (scary, scary) confusion swimming around in her head, but - it's easier not to. She lets Papa and Dad (who rejoins them a few minutes later) handle the interactions with the hospitalpeople. Her mind wanders, unwillingly. 

"Sorry, she isn't well enough for visitors today," the nurse says to Kani and Mags with a sad smile on his face. It's the third time this week. Kani is starting to get scared. She clings to Mags' hand more tightly.

"Has her mom been by?" Mags demands, because the last time that Thrana had seen the two of them, she'd been so hurt and sad that her mom hadn't come by to see her. It was only supposed to be a week, but now it'd been three, and none of them knew what was going on and none of the adults would explain anything, preferring to reassure them that it was all what was best for Thrana.

The way the nurse looks (angry, haunted, guilty) before he shoos them out of the building is unforgettable. Mags asks her, as they walk home, what Kani thinks it means (Mags wasn't good at faces, not at all). She guesses, hesitantly, that he was hiding something bad from them. In the next few weeks, they start to learn what.

It doesn't take them that long to notice that Kani's attention has left the room; they share a look of mixed concern and relief. It never seems like she's remembering happy things, when she does this, but - well, it's a familiar behavior, at least, and it means they can focus on explaining everything they know to the triage nurse and then again to the nurse practitioner about 15 minutes later (quiet night at the hospital, luckily):

They found her collapsed on the hiking trail and did their best to tend to her various cuts and bruises. Yes, she sometimes hikes in the dusk - it's never been a problem before, she's had a lot of safety training. No, she doesn't have a history of falling or clumsiness (she's quite agile, actually, that's part of why this is surprising). No, she doesn't have a history of reckless behavior. 

The NP asks if the broken arm is the primary problem. Dave explains that she's shown persistent confusion when anyone mentions that her arm is broken, though she seems aware that it hurts. The NP frowns, types something into his computer, and then says it's time for her to get the arm x-rayed.

She's dragged back into the present when a hospitalperson moves her arm, the one she wasn't supposed to move, and it hurts so bad the pain sends pulses through her brain like shockwaves.

She doesn't understand why (it hurts) and she's so scared (it hurts). Every time they let go of her (it hurts) she thinks that (it hurts) at least it's over now (it hurts), but then there's a buzzing (it hurts) noise and they come back (it hurts) and move her arm again (it hurts it hurts it hurts). 

It takes a while after they finish the x-rays for Kani to stop crying. She doesn't really respond when they try to gently console her, not even to whimper.

They try playing the audiobook, as much for them as for her, but she doesn't respond to that, either, and though she doesn't complain about it anymore (it takes a lot to make her complain, these days) they know she doesn't like it when they listen without her / when she falls asleep, even if it's something they've all heard before.

They talk about work, quietly, because they don't really know what else to do, and the silence is getting to them. (Kani seems to have fallen into her memories again.)

Eventually, they get called back to see a doctor.

The doctor has some really neat green hair with an asymmetric undercut and a [they/them] on their badge. (Kani almost manages a ghost of a smile, seeing this, but doesn't quite get there.)  

"As your fathers suspected, [??¿¿]," the doctor says. They show her... an x-ray, looking at her like this is supposed to mean something. She doesn't know what they want. She shrugs, then winces as a nasty wave of pain shoots up her left arm for some reason.

They look at her, and then turn to her fathers with a confused frown on their face. Dad says, very carefully, "I believe we mentioned to the intake NP that [??¿¿] whenever someone mentions [??¿¿]?" 

The doctor peers at their computer, mutters "Okay, 'exhibits some signs of [??¿¿]' is not a very useful summary there, and types up something. (Papa inhales in that specific way he does when he's going to say something kind of rude, but stops when Dad puts a hand on his shoulder).

They stop talking to her directly, after that, but she's too tired to do more than just listen.

The doctor is going to [??¿¿] for the [??¿¿], which is standard. They have never seen anything like the [??¿¿] before, and can't really think of an explanation in the absence of [??¿¿], but that they should keep an eye on her in case it seems like it's getting worse, and that they'll do a bit of research if they have time.

She is so sick of hearing about [??¿¿], whatever the fuck it is. Papa notices her getting agitated, and squeezes her shoulder. "We'll be out of here soon", he says. "We just gotta do one more thing, okay?"

(She doesn't respond. How could she possibly agree to anything, when they're just saying gibberish? What would it mean?)

Well, it's a good thing she didn't agree, because "one more thing" is VERY EXTREMELY HORRIBLE PAIN, APPARENTLY, and she WOULD NOT HAVE AGREED TO IT IF SHE'D KNOWN THIS. (not that it matters what she agrees to, obviously, but it's the principle of the thing.)

It hurts to watch. Obviously not as bad as it hurts their poor daughter, but - he feels so helpless, and he can tell Dave does too.

They stay with her as the cast goes on, then Dave gets the discharge and care instructions from the doctor while he takes poor Kani into the other room so she doesn't have to hear it - she's been through enough, for now. "You're being really brave, Kankan. We love you so much."

She doesn't feel very brave! She feels scared and confused and also a dull aching pain! She shrugs (ow ow ow there are worse pains than dull and aching!!!)

Papa flinches when she shrugs, which is very confusing but also makes her feel a little bad. It's probably not his fault that everyone has started speaking gibberish. Probably. 

"...Sorry," she mumbles unhappily.

He pets her head and tells her it's okay. (This is obviously Grown Up Bullshitting, but whatever.) He tells her that Dad is going to get medicine for - get medicine and that they can meet him in the car. ("medicine for what?" she doesn't ask. It's not any of her business.) 

 Papa says they'll get milkshakes and fries on the way home, if she wants. She manages to nod meekly. She does want.

Papa insists on putting her behind the driver's seat even though though she usually prefers the passenger, also on buckling her seatbelt for her, carefully, like he hasn't since she was a little kid. It's confusing and a little insulting, but - it's easier not to complain, and the look in his eyes when he asks is... haunting. 

Dad shows up with a pharmacy bag a little bit later.  Papa gets out of the car and closes the door before talking to him, which is also kind of insulting, but whatever. 

Then they both get in the car, and they're off to go home get milkshakes and fries and then go home.

They stop to get milkshakes and fries; they eat them in the parking lot so Pete can hold the milkshake for Kani to sip from, which she looks confused about and at least a bit annoyed with but puts up with, thankfully. (She does not seem any more aware that her arm is broken than she was before, even with the cast and sling, but the pesto bribe appears to be keeping her from trying to move it anyways, which they're both thankful for.) 

She also agrees to take the strong painkiller (in the worringly resigned way she sometimes gets, these days), which is a relief. She's obviously in a lot of pain even if she doesn't understand why, and this will make it easier to sleep.