—and it grabs him and tries to eat him—

—probably it just wants to eat the finger in his pocket, but since his arm is conveniently free between two of the curse's outsized fingers, he can reach into said pocket and grab the finger once again and pop it into his mouth—

—(it tastes like soap)—

—and swallow it—

(Fushiguro has enough energy to facepalm. That idiot is going to diiiiiiiiiie.)

—and right on dramatic cue, Itadori breaks free from the curse's grasp, jumps from its face for some extra momentum, and then lands down onto it, ripping its face to shreds with his nails (?).

It dies. Unlike the times when he punched it and it regenerated, it dies.

One in a million chance. Or more, who knows.

Maybe he was onto something when he said this is the start of the anime plot.

Fushiguro thinks that thinking like that will get him killed and he would much rather not die. On the other hand, Itadori Tōkan has just eaten Ryōmen Sukuna's finger and rather than dying has become a vessel. The actual worst thing that could have happened today... did. If this is the start of an anime, he and Itadori were not the protagonists; Itadori was a short-lived character who gets possessed by a special-grade curse, and Fushiguro was a short-lived source of audience exposition who will soon be killed.

He laughs to himself, a little bit, weakly.

But his laughter is more than matched by the growing cackle coming from the body previously occupied by Itadori Tōkan. Said body seems to have acquired various markings, lines going along his arms and neck and face. Two lines on his face, actually, right under his eyes, are more than lines—they open, and reveal another pair of eyes. Ryōmen Sukuna laughs, to himself, at who knows what, the picture of a villain, examining his three-inch-long claws and his newfound body. "Ah, I had forgotten," he says, laughing so much he's almost doubling over. "The moonlight feels so much better on a body made of flesh."

He places both hands on his own chest, then shuts his fists around his shirt and with a single pull rips it off his body, showing off his (or Itadori's?) toned physique and, more importantly, the various lines, markings, tattoos adorning his torso. He laughs some more, looking to all the world like he is enjoying himself immensely.

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck they are so fucked he is so fucked he is absolutely dead—maybe he can pretend to be dead, maybe he can run—he cannot take on a special-grade curse by himself, not as weak as he is, not when he was just thrown through a wall and down two stories, he is a sorcerer but he is not made of steel—

As if on cue, Sukuna swivels around to look at Fushiguro. "Thinking of running? Maybe I'll let you. Tell your sorcerer friends all about this and watch them try to stop me. Ah, it's been centuries, and I feel like a feast is in order—could you run if I pulled one of your legs off?" He starts taking steps towards the boy. "Your pick which. Just don't bleed out on your way back. Or do, I suppose it's up to you. I have children to kill and women to dismember and men to rape, or is it the other way around?" He grins widely, stopping just a few steps in front of the sorcerer. "Maybe both ways! All ways! I can do whatever I want—"

He slaps himself. "What do you think you are doing?" he asks, and this time he... does not sound like Sukuna. At all.

...Itadori? He's... still there?

Sukuna's—Itadori's—that body's face goes through rather a lot of expressions, eventually landing on disbelief. "How... do you have control over this body?"

"Anime protagonist powers," Itadori's voice replies on cue.

Now Fushiguro starts laughing again, and he's not sure if he should be crying instead.

"You... what...?"

Itadori places both hands on his cheeks and then slaps himself a few times. "My body. The eyes and tattoos and claws are cool and all but my body. Not yours."

Itadori... is managing to subdue Sukuna.

Maybe Fushiguro isn't dead after all. He pulls himself to his feet—no, not yet, okay, he pulls himself to his knee, and closes his hands in twin fists, holding the right fist above the left. "Itadori Tōkan," he says, "you are no longer human. And as a cursed spirit... it is my job to kill you."

Tōkan blinks, then looks down at Fushiguro again. "...that is not what happens next. I just managed to subdue the—whoever it was. Ryōmen Sukuna, you said it was called?"

"I don't have—a choice." His shadow gains a fluid character and starts rotating around him menacingly as he says this.

"Yeah you do! And look, fine!" He points at himself where the tattoo-like markings start to fade and the claws shrink back to nails. "Just me! Itadori Tōkan!"

"That's not—the point—"

Anime logic is not real life logic. He is meant to kill Itadori while he is weak and then Sukuna will—not be a problem—

"What's all this, then?" asks a voice that is far too cheerful for these circumstances.

Fushiguro nearly loses balance at that, and he is definitely startled away from making his shadows swirl menacingly. "Gojō-sensei!"

Okay that "anime" theory is getting more and more plausible by the minute what the fuck.

"Hey!" says the blindfolded man with white hair and an incessant smile. "I wasn't planning on coming, but..." he trails off, and looks at Fushiguro. Well, turns his head towards him, it's not clear if he's looking at him or not. "Who'd want to miss you getting your ass kicked? I have to show the second years!"

Out comes his phone, followed by the obnoxious sound of a picture being taken.