"Right.  Well, can somebody now please take me to my Grandpa's actual farm?"

"Haha! Ha! This really is the place!"

"I can see that you're tired from your long journey. You should get some rest! Tomorrow you can explore the town a bit and introduce yourself. The townspeople would really appreciate that. We haven't had a newcomer in years!"

"If I were to ask what became of the previous newcomer..."

"Well, Leah moved here a few years back to become an artist, and she's alive and well and pursuing her passion! Elliott moved here to write a novel. Pelican Town is a great place to get away from the hustle and bustle of Zuzu City and focus on your craft."

Possibly Oliver actually does fit right in here, and everyone here is just messing with him, exactly like he'd do.

Now that's a strange, but strangely heartening prospect.

Does the key his Grandpa sent him open up the front door of this tiny 'farmhouse'?

It does!

The one-room farmhouse is small inside. There's a bed, a table and chair, and a houseplant so sturdy that it has survived this period of neglect. There is also a TV on a stand. There does not appear to be a kitchen or a bathroom.

...would Grandpa Greenie have been messing with him?  Seems sort of mean, but when you're dead you're beyond revenge.

Whatever's up, it's evident that the other town inhabitants are in on it.

He'll head back outside.

"There is not, in fact, a kitchen or a bathroom or a shower inside this purported dwelling place of my Grandpa.  If we're all keeping up the bit, where do I end up sleeping tonight after I point out this fact?"

"Sounds like I'm going to have a customer for farmhouse upgrades sooner rather than later! Haha!"

"Your very first upgrade will get you a kitchen, and it's only 10,000G and 450 wood. Sounds like you would prefer to cook some of your own meals, so that kitchen will come in handy."

"As for the bathroom... do you really need one of those? None of the houses in Pelican Town have them! If you get a bit sticky you have a pond on your property and you can take a dip there, and there's the river just a few minutes' walk south of here!"

"If you're hungry you can always stop by Gus's tavern and he'll rustle you up something delicious to eat. That's what your Grandpa always did, he liked the company at mealtimes I think."

"And if I asked how I'd go about getting 10,000G and 450 wood, or how long after that it'd take until I had a kitchen..."

Oliver does not expect this information to be true, useful, or related to reality in any direct way.  The whole thing feels like an escape room he's supposed to navigate out of using dialogue options.

Thanks, Grandpa Greenie.  Someday Oliver may have a grandson, and when the time comes Oliver will leave his grandson in some fantastically elaborate post-death trap in accordance with what is apparently family tradition.

(Grandpa was in fact hoping Oliver would carry on family tradition.)

(Grandpa is silent on whether by this he meant 'farming' or 'trolling.')

"Oh, goodness sakes, there's no shortage of ways to make money around here! Farming, foraging, fishing, mining! You'll have 10,000G in no time if you apply yourself!"

"And I do the upgrades pretty fast once you order them. Come up to my place up the hill and bring me the money and the materials and it'll take me three days after that, unless there's a festival in the meantime!"

"Three days.  I see.  Now, supposing I wanted to try my hand at mining, a famously safe occupation to embark upon as an individual with no prior training, how would I do that and what sort of earnings could I expect after a hard day's work?"

"Unfortunately the entrance to the mines is currently blocked. I'm pretty steamed about it. That darn Joja Corporation left behind a giant construction mess when they were putting in the Joja Mart on the east side of town. I've been after them to clear it up and they are actively working on it but I think it's going to be about another five days before they're done and you can get into the mines."

"The mines are very deep, lots of levels, and the amount you can make increases as you go down... but it gets more dangerous, too. Lots of monsters down there. You should ask Marlon up at the Adventurer's Guild for more info if you want to get into that line of work."

"I don't know why I was unable to anticipate such an obvious response."

"So, where would I find Gus's tavern, if I'm looking for a meal?  And does that, by any chance, cost anything?"

Oliver isn't sure if he's meant to sleep in the cabin overnight, but he'd be surprised if he's actually meant to bathe in the pond.  He's also at least a little concerned about what happens if he leaves his luggage inside the cabin, though he supposes it does have a door that locks... well, if they were actually out to commit crimes at him, he'd need to worry about rat poison in hamburgers too.

Whether or not the food at Gus's tavern is 'free' seems potentially informative about how much of a fun prank this all is.

"The tavern's not hard to find. Just head east right past the bus stop where you arrived, and then keep going. That'll take you to the town square, and Gus's Stardrop Saloon is right in the middle of that. The place is hopping until about midnight most nights."

"Gus has lots of good things. You can get a plate of spaghetti for 240G, or a beer for 400G. He always has a dish of the day too but I don't know what he's got today."

"Do you eat... every day?"

"It's habit-forming."

So he has enough 'G' for two meals... well, that's not actually condemning himself to starvation on arrival.

"You must be quite a hard-working fellow if you eat so often! Or I guess maybe you just like the buffs."

Yeah, he's picking up on the theme here.

Oliver will now go inspect his cabin and his 'farm' in additional detail, to see if there's any mysterious keys in there.

Examining the inside of the cabin as if it were an escape room does not yield any mysterious keys. Or even any perfectly straightforward keys.

The TV currently offers a menu of three programs:

- Weather Report
- Fortune Teller
- Livin' Off the Land

The bed has brand-new bedding on it and definitely does not show any signs of Grandpa having recently died in it.

...sorry, what is on those TV programs?  Especially the two that aren't the weather report?