"Ohhh I see. That might be fine, because, again, I am not in a hurry and am already a wizard? Is that less fine than it sounds?"

"Natural awakenings tend to suck and a lot of people don't want to gatekeep cool magic behind something that sucks happening. But, of course, they are mostly not wizards."

"Tend to suck in ways that are not about getting the wrong assortment?"

"Natural awakenings tend to be triggered by traumatic and/or life threatening events."

"Huh. Does it make them likelier? Sooner?"

"Not by itself but a lot of witch awakeners who arrange for their clients to end up with that complication also end up low-key arranging for them to get hit by a car or something later. To avoid the eventuality where they die of old age without ever awakening their potential, which does happen to potential witches."

"Ah. Wizards do live longer than mundies when we don't instead not do that but not forever. Is it like scaring away the hiccups where it won't work if I specify something that'd give me a right scare?"

"Witch longevity can be bottled so I don't think you need to worry about that specifically. I can't actually predict for sure what will or won't work in advance, it's too flickery."

"Ah, rats. Could have just brewed up something that'd get me halfway to a heart attack."

"I would offer suggestions but they are in fact less likely to work if you're anticipating them."

"Well, this can be another one I circle back to, I suppose."

"Sorry about all the things that pattern-match to the principle of balance."

"It's okay, if I were not always surrounded by reasons to believe in such a principle we wouldn't have one, so you may guess I'm used to it!"

"I have higher standards for myself than what everyone is already used to!"

"You didn't invent any of this nonsense, did you?"

"Well, no, but I can still be sorry about it even if I'm not responsible for it."

"Just checking. Since you're a god. You might have invented some things. Are there more things?"

"There are more things. I'm a god but I'm a very young god, most of the things I'm specifically responsible for have my name on them. Not, like, all, but most. There's one that will leak your personal setup to a number of entities that are monitoring for a specific type of energy spike associated with awakenings, one that gives you horrible nightmares, and one that sorts you into one of a handful of feuding factions that won't really take 'what the fuck, I opted into none of this' as an answer."

"...who-all is looking into awakenings and what might they do about it?"

"Anyone with the witch equivalent of a police scanner, and whatever they like."

"That doesn't sound like a big deal? Does it often turn out to be one?"

"It is most often not a big deal, but someone could decide to take an unfortunate interest in you, especially if I give you any especially excellent goodies, and also some of them will definitely sell your personal information to Alphazon."

"Who is Alphazon, is that some kind of demonic entity or...?"

She is not going to say "more or less," that joke is only funny if you have the required cultural context. 

"It's a very big company on this side of the Veil. They do some good stuff and some bad stuff and they were partially responsible for nuking New Alexandria."

"Do I, in any important respect, resemble New Alexandria."