Beka is used to dreams being weird, but usually they are weird in containing odd combinations of normal things, such as a balrog who speaks with her grandmother's voice, or a bowl of gravel that tastes like porridge.

"What?" she says, in case that helps.

"I'm going to ask you questions to determine what plant in someone's garden you're most similar to. Don't worry too much about it, it doesn't really matter."

"It sure doesn't sound like it would. Can I see the plants?"

"I can try to show you. There's a basil plant in a turtle pot, some parsley with green stems but pale brown leaves, yellow dahlias, and a pot that's supposed to have roses but they seemingly haven't sprouted yet."

(Author's note to future readers: If these links are dead, there might be new image links at the results page?)

"I want to be the dahlias!"

"I don't know if it's going to say you're the dahlias but we can see. Shall I get started with the questions?"

"Okay. Are they just going to be like 'are you yellow'..."

"No."

"All right. Question 1: How are you doing currently?
A. Idk what happened. Everything was going great, now I'm barely even alive.
B. What day is it? Is anything real? When was the last time I showered?
C. I'm thriving! I'm doing projects, self care, getting a healthy amount of sleep, it's awesome!
D. I'm getting the hang of this 'new normal'. It was hard at first but now I have a routine,"

"Isn't the normal way to ask a question to just ask the question and not make up answers?"

"Twofeatheredarr wanted to evaluate people without being personally present, so they made a system for turning answers into an evaluation. However, the system can only be so complicated, which is why you have to pick from prewritten answers. It'll probably be the case that none of them are perfectly accurate for you. Just pick whatever's closest and ask me clarifying questions as needed."

"I don't know what showering is or what it would mean to know what day it is, and I guess it's sure possible that nothing around me is real if I pissed somebody off and haven't gotten to the bad parts or don't remember them right now? So I guess that one."

"Okay. For context, showering is a kind of washing where water gets sprayed on you from above."

"Question 2: Pick a color.
A. Brown
B. RAINBOW
C. Blue
D. Red
E. Yellow
F. Green
G. Any earthtones"

"That's more colors than there are plants to be like!"

"Yeah, I don't know exactly how the quiz author's system works."

"What's RAINBOW?"

"When there's a white light, like from the sun or fire so hot it's white, and it shines through water droplets, it shows a big range of colors. So in a context like this, 'rainbow' pretty much just means 'all the colors'."

"From the what?"

"In lots of worlds, there's something in the sky that glows really brightly, and it appears to move around the world such that it rises and sets at predictable times."

"Weeeeeeird. Well, I want to be the dahlias and yellow is nice but maybe I want to pick rainbow anyway..."

"If it's really important to you we can rerun the quiz with another set of answers later."

"It doesn't really affect anything, though, right? I don't - get a dahlia if I get that answer."

"I might get you a dream of a dahlia either way but it'll be gone when you wake up. You don't get anything for real."

"I guess rainbow then."

"Okay."

"Question 3: Pick a house.
A. A full size bouncy house that you can live in
B. A cute cottage
C. A small apartment, but in a great location
D. A farm house far away from 'civilization'"

"A bouncy house would be … like, do people you know ever play games that involve an inflatable ball? Like the entire house is made of big inflatable balls."

"What makes a location great?"