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Gender? I hardly know 'er!
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so it's like having the hand of God nudging causality from the outside to come out the way it "should" for the story to make sense, like the way evolutionist christians think God nudged evolution?

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That sounds about right!
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Terrifying but really cool. Maybe the Spirit of Femininity Unleashed is the actual God. ...or, more likely, his author.

okay, now elephant in the room: I'm a boy

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The Spirit of Femininity Unleashed is open to anyone who's open to femininity!
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what does that mean?

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I don't know what it means for you! Maybe you're open to being a girl, or to being a girl sometimes, or just to being kind of girly! Whatever it is, though, there's some form of femininity that you're open to experiencing and exploring. The Spirit of Femininity Unleashed is never wrong about these things!
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Okay but like what does that mean? He's a boy, he dresses like a boy and acts like a boy, he plays soccer and his social circle is mostly other boys and sure he's bisexual but sexuality has nothing to do with gender and besides he's never had any fantasies about being a girl, he's pretty sure he's not trans. And sure, maybe a lot of the boy scripts are kind of uncomfortable, or really uncomfortable, and maybe he doesn't like the predatory sexuality expectation, and the predator expectation in general, and maybe he doesn't love the way people keep having these preconceived notions about him based on his gender, and he cries more than boys are meant to but fuck gender roles, really, and he thinks he'd look hot with eyeliner and there was that time watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer in which Faith was being lesbians with Buffy in a club and he kinda wanted to be Faith being lesbians and...

...

Maybe his masculinity is feeling kind of threatened here because he's starting to feel really defensive of it. He's not a girl! He doesn't want to be a girl! Most of the time! He thinks! And who does this notebook think it is, telling him he's a girl and he's starting to project here.

...

tell me more about what exactly is going on here?

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What do you mean? Which aspects of the situation do you want to hear more about?
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what the Spirit of Femininity Unleashed is, what you know about why it picked me in particular out of all people it could've, what kinds of powers it gives, what it expects me to do with those powers...

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The Spirit of Femininity Unleashed is the unified wish of every person who has ever felt, or wanted to feel, powerful and beautiful and special in a feminine way! It can't communicate with people like you or I directly, so it sends avatars like me to carry out its will by offering power to people who are ✨open to the feminine✨. I can't explain why it chooses the specific people it does, but all it wants from you is to make your choices freely and live your own beautiful powerful special life just the way you want!

As for what kinds of powers it gives, I have a list. Would you like to see my list? It's very ✨neatly formatted✨.
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so it's, like, a finite itemised list of individual things I can pick? sure, i'm down, let's go

Ahahahahahahah what's his life become. It hasn't even been half his Geometry class and he's about to look at a list of mystical powers from the Spirit of Femininity Unleashed which apparently wants to trans him.

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Sure thing! Just a moment... ⏳

The hourglass animates itself in realtime as ink swirls across a fairly hefty block of subsequent pages, settling into a more graphic-designed, less handwritten format than the notebook has thus far been using to communicate. When the hourglass stops and the ink goes still, the list spans all of them, with point counters reading 0/70 in the top corner of every list-bearing page.

A preamble paragraph before the main list reads,

These powers are offered under an aegis of metanarrative protection. Anytime you might expect a power to have obvious negative side effects, like glowing eyes making it harder to see, it simply won't—you'll be able to see just fine anytime it actually matters, while having dramatically hazy vision at cool, narratively appropriate moments. This doesn't apply to your own preferences about the explicitly described effects of the power; if you don't want to be Well Endowed, the metanarrative cannot protect you from choosing that option and having to live with it.

After that it gets long.

Destinations

You must choose exactly one Destination.

Name: Stay Put - Cost: 0
You're just going to take these powers and keep on keeping on right where you are.

Name: Somewhere In Mind - Cost: 0
You have a destination you want to go to. You can choose any place, real, historical, fictional, or made up in your own head right now, and the Spirit will take you there. After that, you're on your own as far as further interdimensional travel.

Name: Isekai Roulette - Cost: 0
Trust to the will of the Spirit and let it take you where you need to go. It will look at far more options than you could ever know about, and pick something that's likely to be even better for you than whatever you would have chosen on your own.

 

Yourself

These powers affect your own self and nature, without direct effects on other people. Some of them are prerequisites for powers in the later Power of Friendship section.

Name: A Thousand Ships - Cost: 1
Your face is simply exquisite, an ideal of feminine beauty. There are many possible ideals of feminine beauty, and yours is whichever one speaks most deeply to your soul. Others may match your beauty in their own way, but never exceed it.

Name: What's In A Name - Cost: 1
Magic to divine true names will accept whatever alias you choose to think of as your true name. Magic to use your true name against you will fail.

Name: Angelic Tones - Cost: 2
Your voice is supernaturally beautiful and you can sing in any vocal range.

Name: Emerald Orbs - Cost: 2
At all times, your eyes are exactly the right colour. This effect operates based on your sense of aesthetics, in-the-moment preferences, and narrative considerations. Your eyes can be ANY colour this way. Lightless black voids? Brilliant white stars? Limpid pools of endless sapphire? They will look exactly the way you'd want them to look if you were writing a self-insert fanfic about this exact moment of your life.

Name: Perfect Hair - Cost: 2
At all times, you have exactly the right hairstyle. This effect operates based on your sense of aesthetics, in-the-moment preferences, and narrative considerations. It is not limited to physically or logistically plausible hairstyles.

Name: Size Difference - Cost: 2
At all times, you are exactly the right height. This effect operates based on your sense of aesthetics, in-the-moment preferences, and narrative considerations. It will usually keep any height changes fairly subtle, but at dramatic moments you might discover yourself able to shrink to the size of a bee or grow to the size of a giant.

Name: Dressing Room - Cost: 3
No matter how ridiculous your outfit, it will stay pristine and perfect, unless it would be more dramatic for you to be artfully bedraggled. You can use any quiet moment to yourself to quick-change your clothes, shoes, nails, and hairstyle into a completely new look. (You cannot change your hair length or colour this way without Perfect Hair, but you can braid or style it.)

Name: Personal Hygiene - Cost: 1
You are always clean and fresh, never needing to use a bath or toilet.

Name: Like Roses - Cost: 1
(Requires Personal Hygiene)
You smell lovely. Your scent is unique to you, and may involve any combination of warm spices, floral notes, petrichor, or other things you think smell good. You do not need any justification for why you smell like this.

Name: Just A Little Longer - Cost: 1
If you push yourself, you can keep doing any task or working on any project indefinitely, visibly strained but never impaired by injury or fatigue. As soon as you stop, you'll collapse with exhaustion and sleep for up to a full day to regain your strength. This only works when what you're doing is personally important to you.

Name: Immunity System - Cost: 3
You can't get sick or poisoned. You can still use recreational drugs and alcohol normally, but can't overdose.

Name: My Ears Are Burning - Cost: 6
You always know exactly what people are thinking, as long as it's about you. This effect is not telepathy and is not blocked by effects that block telepathy. It applies even to people you can't perceive normally. You are never impaired by the flood of information.

Name: Well Endowed - Cost: 1
You have a generous figure, whether that's a classic hourglass or more of a well-rounded look; you can choose the details. Your endowments maintain a state of perfect grace and beauty at all times, never troubling you with uncomfortable bounces or uninvited jiggles.

Name: Hollow Leg - Cost: 1
(Requires Well Endowed.)
Regardless of your diet and exercise habits, your body maintains the physique and silhouette you prefer. Lack of visible muscle never impairs your strength or endurance. As your preferences change, so will your body; you are no longer bound to the generous figure stipulated by Well Endowed.

Name: Inner Strength - Cost: 3
(Requires Hollow Leg.)
You are implausibly, superhumanly strong, with endurance and toughness to match. You might have to strain a little to lift and carry at the same level as construction equipment, or deal with lightly scraped knuckles if you punch as hard as a battering ram.

Name: Battle Angel - Cost: 1
Somehow, you never get significantly injured in a fight, unless it's a very dramatic and plot-relevant fight in which case you might be glamorously wounded and pick up a cool new scar.

Name: Battle Demon - Cost: 1
You have an unerring intuition for gaps in an opponent's defenses, though it may be beyond your power to exploit them.

Name: Battle Maiden - Cost: 3
(Requires Battle Angel and Battle Demon)
No matter what kind of fight you're getting in, you're always a match for even the most skilled opponent.

Name: Making Ends Meet - Cost: 1
You have enough money to sustain a comfortable lifestyle. It comes from a source you don't have to pay much attention to, like a job with almost no responsibilities, a large inheritance, or a noble title.

Name: Motherlode - Cost: 2
(Requires Making Ends Meet.)
You have enough money to sustain a fairly extravagant lifestyle. It doesn't come from anywhere, you just have it.

Name: Four Star Daydream - Cost: 4
(Requires Motherlode.)
The answer to "can I afford that" is "yes".

Name: Dragon Fairy Elf Witch - Cost: 5
You can at any time discover previously unknown heritage from any type of being you encounter, even if this makes no sense or contradicts previously established descriptions of your family tree. You always get their powers without their drawbacks, unless the drawbacks are cool and dramatic. Any visible features of this heritage will appear at narratively appropriate moments and be cute, pretty, beautiful, or striking rather than awkward, weird, gross, or scary. This ability works even if the beings in question cannot reproduce with humans, or at all.

Name: Omniglot - Cost: 3
You learn languages insanely, ludicrously fast. You know exactly what any word said to you means, and you make strangely accurate guesses about how to phrase things you're trying to say. You never forget any grammar or vocabulary you learn.

Name: Anything You Can Do - Cost: 6
You learn implausibly quickly from friends, rivals, and love interests. If you have a personal connection to someone with a certain skill, talent, or expertise, you'll learn it five times faster than they did, or twenty times faster if they're actively trying to teach you. This applies even to forms of magic that you ordinarily shouldn't be able to learn.

Name: Closed Book - Cost: 1
You're immune to any supernatural, pharmaceutical, or other effect that would let people directly read your thoughts or feelings.

Name: Indelible - Cost: 1
You're immune to any supernatural, pharmaceutical, or other effect that would let people directly alter your thoughts or feelings.

Name: Iron Will - Cost: 2
"(Requires Closed Book and Indelible.)
You are immune to all forms of mental illusion, alteration, interference, or control. Even extreme torture, extended solitary confinement, advanced brainwashing techniques, and so on cannot touch you. You can be lonely but not cripplingly lonely. You can be upset but not traumatized. "

 

Power of Friendship

These powers affect how others see you and how you interact with them.

In general, effects that describe others' reactions (like their attention being drawn to you by Mysterious Allure, or their sympathy being provoked by Tragic Backstory) operate on a metanarrative rather than a causal level. They are not mind control, and are not blocked by effects that block mind control.

Your "true love" is anyone you're pursuing a serious romantic relationship with. You can have as many of these as you like, but your feelings for all of them must be genuine.

Name: Mysterious Allure - Cost: 5
There's just something about you. People are drawn to you, fascinated by you. You tend to be the most interesting person in the room unless something really unusual is going on.

Name: Captive Audience - Cost: 3
As long as you have genuine interest in what you're talking about, no one will ever get bored of listening to you talk about it.

Name: Blackout Binge - Cost: 2
(Requires Immunity System)
Heavy use of recreational intoxicants puts you in a carefree, uninhibited state in which it will be universally agreed afterward that you were not responsible for your actions.

Name: Disney Princess - Cost: 2
Animals are always friendly to you, especially the small cute ones. You can effectively tame any animal by feeding it and speaking gently to it.

Name: Best Friend - Cost: 3
You have an animal companion, like a horse or a cat or a raven. They have a cool name and maybe a few nifty cosmetic quirks, like glowing purple eyes. Their loyalty is infinite and they often hold the key to solving whatever situation you're up against. You can understand them perfectly even though they can't speak, and they always know exactly what you mean even if all you do is glance at them meaningfully.

Name: Bestest Friend - Cost: 5
(Requires Best Friend)
Your animal companion is a fully magical creature, like a dragon or unicorn. They have magnificent supernatural powers ready to be used at your command. They can speak every language you can, but can still communicate with you on a deeper level of mutual love and understanding.

Name: Generosity - Cost: 3
Your friends love to get you presents. They'll try to pick out things you'll like, but their success depends on how well they know you.

Name: Helpfulness - Cost: 4
Your friends love to do you favours. They'll volunteer eagerly whenever you need help with small tasks.

Name: Cuddle Buddies - Cost: 2
Your friends love to hug and cuddle you. Even someone who ordinarily isn't into that sort of thing will make an exception for you.

Name: Flattery - Cost: 1
Your friends love to compliment you and tell you all about how much they like you and why.

Name: Quality Time - Cost: 2
Your friends love to hang out with you and spend time together, even if you're not doing anything interesting or important.

Name: Agree to Agree - Cost: 4
You can always convince your friends to see your point of view about things like politics and philosophy. They might have a few quibbles here and there, but they'll see how right you are once you explain where you're coming from in enough detail.

Name: Love Interest - Cost: 1
(Requires A Thousand Ships and Mysterious Allure)
Anyone you fall for will inevitably like you back. They may not necessarily act on their feelings, but the potential will be there.

Name: Love Triangle - Cost: 2
(Requires Love Interest)
People you fall for will be open to dating you even if they already have another serious relationship, or other circumstances that would ordinarily interfere, like a demanding career or a vow of chastity. This may cause drama, but it'll blow over quickly and there won't be any serious problems.

Name: Love Dodecahedron - Cost: 5
(Requires Love Triangle)
When you fall for someone who is already seriously dating or even married, your romantic rival will be open to allowing their partner to date you, and may even want to date you themselves.

Name: Time Enough For Love - Cost: 5
No matter how many people you want to date or be close friends with, you will somehow find the time to hang out with all of them and express your love and care. This power can only be used for relationship activities and not for anything else you might want to use the ability to be in two places at once for.

Name: I Can Fix Them - Cost: 5
Regardless of how morally despicable someone is, your love can and will reform them into a genuinely good, kind, upstanding person who regrets their evil deeds.

Name: True Love's Kiss - Cost: 1
By kissing your true love, you can break any curse, heal any injury, and cure any illness. The same works in reverse.

Name: Planned Parenthood - Cost: 1
You can only have children if you actively and specifically want to. Your partners will understand this and not worry too much about it.

Name: Two Become One - Cost: 1
(Requires Planned Parenthood)
When you have sex, it is always special and wonderful and beautiful. No one ever elbows anyone in the face or makes undignified noises.

Name: Bop It - Cost: 1
(Requires Two Become One)
The mysteries of another's body are an open book to you, and you always know exactly how to move and touch in order to please someone in bed.

Name: The Princess And The Dragon - Cost: 3
No matter who or what you're trying to sleep with, the logistics will all work out, somehow. Arbitrary differences in size, biology, temperature, substrate, and underlying physics can be gotten around with sufficient creativity and determination.

Name: GGG - Cost: 4
Your true love will be willing to try just about anything you suggest in bed, and if you really enjoy it, they'll really enjoy it too.

Name: Before Your Eyes - Cost: 4
In your presence, people become willing to experiment sexually in ways they normally wouldn't. For some reason this applies especially well to boys kissing each other.

Name: Fated Lovers - Cost: 3
You will meet someone who will go on to become your true love. If you enter a specific universe with a specific target in mind, you'll meet that person under favourable circumstances, and if it doesn't work out with them, this power will keep introducing you to new possibilities until you find someone who's right for you. If you're the sort of person who can have multiple true loves, you'll keep meeting new ones until you have enough.

Name: Sorry About That - Cost: 3
Your true love will be extremely forgiving. Even if you make mistakes or act thoughtlessly toward them, a simple apology will mend things between you. They may expect you to try to improve, but they'll be infinitely patient about how fast that improvement takes place.

Name: Excuse Me - Cost: 5
(Requires Sorry About That)
All your friends will be just as forgiving as your true love.

Name: Tragic Backstory - Cost: 8
(Requires Excuse Me)
Something terrible happened to you in your past. Anyone who hears about it immediately forgives you for any and all bad behaviour in the present. They will not expect you to grow or change, and will continue sympathetically excusing whatever you do indefinitely.

Name: Sense of Style - Cost: 4
People who are romantically interested in you will start dressing more to your taste. The more romantically compatible they are, the better they'll be able to guess exactly what to wear to catch your eye.

Name: Bonus Style Points - Cost: 3
(Requires Sense of Style)
Luck will shine on anyone trying to dress up for you. They'll get their hands on outfits they couldn't normally afford, their clothes will fit better, and in extreme cases they might even find themselves able to change shape, sex, or species—though only in ways that make them more, not less, comfortable in their own skin.

Name: Popular - Cost: 3
Wherever you go, you develop a reputation fast. The sort of people who you'd like to have as fans tend to hear about you and be impressed. You may not make an impression on mainstream society at large, but you'll develop a following among the people who best resonate with your style.

Name: Famous - Cost: 3
(Requires Popular.)
Wherever you go, people really take to you. You're the subject of constant gossip and most people have heard of you before you meet them. People you've never met will get crushes on you.

Name: Undiplomatic Immunity - Cost: 6
You are above the law. Any crimes you commit will be overlooked by the authorities. Note that, if you do enough crime that you start looking more like an invading army, local governments will still feel free to declare war.

Name: Friends In Low Places - Cost: 3
You make friends easily among the lowest echelons of society, the underdogs and underworlders. Moving and acting in these circles is intuitive and natural for you.

Name: Friends In High Places - Cost: 3
You make friends easily at the highest echelons of society, among the rich and powerful. Moving and acting in these circles is intuitive and natural for you.

Name: Friends in Strange Places - Cost: 3
You make friends easily in small isolated communities, among those who may be scorned by mainstream society for their differences or may just be so obscure that mainstream society mostly hasn't heard of them. Moving and acting in these circles is intuitive and natural for you.

 

Drawbacks

These options grant points rather than costing them. They represent inconveniences or mitigations of existing advantages.

Name: Decorative - Grants: +1
You are unfailingly cute and pretty and feminine at all times, in all circumstances. You cannot wear insufficiently pretty clothes. You cannot make insufficiently pretty noises. You cannot ugly cry.

Name: Beauty Is A Curse - Grants: +1
(Requires A Thousand Ships)
No, you don't understand. Beauty IS a curse. People will NOT stop bringing it up. Everyone you meet just has to point out how pretty you are. This will never stop happening. Even the most tactful people find it slipping out subtly, as remarks about the luster of your hair or the depth of your eyes.

Name: Plain Jane - Grants: +2
No matter what you look like, nor how many times people tell you you're beautiful, when you look in the mirror all you see is imperfections. You will never be fully satisfied with your appearance on an instinctive level.

Name: Style of Sisyphus - Grants: +1
Anytime you settle on a personal style that works well for you, soon afterward you'll encounter inspiration for another style that you like even better. You might end up cycling between different fashions, or trying to incporporate them all into a single outfit (and then finding another inspiration and having to start all over again).

Name: There's Another One - Grants: +3
You are not the only vessel of the Spirit. You might meet someone else with similar powers to yours; you might even meet more than one. Your susceptibility to one another's powers will be governed by the narrative.

Name: Incomplete - Grants: +5
About half of people you encounter will be immune to all effects listed under Power of Friendship, and about half of those who remain will see reduced effects. You can do nothing to change this.

Name: Green With Envy - Grants: +6
People are so eager to be your friend that they become bitter and vindictive when denied the opportunity. You can tear apart long-established friend groups if you aren't careful to give everyone equal attention, and sometimes even then. This effect is particularly harsh around people you're dating.

Name: You Ruin Them - Grants: +3
Once someone has dated, slept with, or even shared a deep and longing glance across a room with you, their heart is never fully satisfied with anyone else. Other relationships pale in comparison to what they could have, or imagine they could have, with you.

Name: Jilted Lovers - Grants: +4
When you break up with someone, they become monomaniacally obsessed with getting back together. If you take Realism, this will absolutely escalate to violent stalking.

Name: The Crazy Train - Grants: +6
Powers that you should be able to control directly or influence by your mood and preferences (like Dragon Fairy Elf Witch, Emerald Orbs, or What's In A Name) instead answer only to the narrative, which is still using your aesthetics but might not necessarily have your best interests in mind. Combines... interestingly... with Realism.

Name: They'll Know - Grants: +8
This drawback lifts the veil that discourages people from realizing how your powers affect the world around them and their own minds. Warning: this knowledge can cause a lot of trouble.

Name: Realism - Grants: +20
Give up your metanarrative protection. Although your individually selected powers still work as described, the invisible synergies that protect you from, say, gaining violent stalkers through Mysterious Allure or being genuinely traumatized by your Tragic Backstory are removed. Additionally, though effects like I Can Fix Them still operate, they may take considerably more effort, care, thought, and narrative investment on your part.

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Oh the genre he's in is a CYOA. Oh. Oh that is wild. He wonders if he's a self-insert CYOA? He hadn't conceived of himself as writing CYOAs at all let alone ones of himself but who knows. That'd be... He probably shouldn't be drawing any conclusions from this half-baked possibility that vaguely crossed his mind, it's not like he has any way of finding it out and he should not make any decisions that are based on this.

Anyway, before he actually reads any of this in detail he... goes to the end and sees if there's any space for him to write stuff because he has belatedly realised that he will probably have questions.

(Also it's very narratively convenient that his teacher isn't bothering him, isn't it. Being in a story has its perks, he supposes.)

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There's plenty of pages left blank after the end of the list for him to write on!

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can I rip a page off you and use it to write questions and keep talking? it's fine if not, I just will definitely have questions and going back and forth would be a bit of a chore

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Oh dear. I think that would work but it sounds kind of uncomfortable. Do you want me to insert blank pages in between all the pages of the list? That's pretty easy!
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that works too, thank you!

separately, how much uh I mean what senses do you have exactly?

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There is a general shuffling of pages in a hard-to-describe motion that ends with every double-sided page of list flanked by two double-sided pages of blankness.

I can tell exactly what's on all my pages, and I can tell when I'm touched, and I can sort of tell some things about my surroundings but not very much, and being damaged is uncomfortable but being written in isn't at all.
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Back to the start of the list.

interesting! okay, i'll keep that in mind. time to read these.

Destinations!

You must choose exactly one Destination.

Name: Stay Put - Cost: 0
You're just going to take these powers and keep on keeping on right where you are.

Name: Somewhere In Mind - Cost: 0
You have a destination you want to go to. You can choose any place, real, historical, fictional, or made up in your own head right now, and the Spirit will take you there. After that, you're on your own as far as further interdimensional travel.

Name: Isekai Roulette - Cost: 0
Trust to the will of the Spirit and let it take you where you need to go. It will look at far more options than you could ever know about, and pick something that's likely to be even better for you than whatever you would have chosen on your own.

...well, he has questions already!

so isekaiing is a possibility, is that a permanent truck-kun arrangement or?

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What's a truck-kun? Going to another world is only permanent if the world you travel to doesn't have any interdimensional travel of its own, but lots of worlds do!
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truck-kun is a trope in some forms of isekai fiction where the main character dies, often by being hit by a truck, to be transported to their isekai destination, and people have created a shared joke that it's always the same truck that kills isekai protagonists and it's truck-kun

Why is he writing a lengthy explanation of who truck-kun is, is it because he's scared of having to think about being isekai'd, yes it is.

would the isekai roulette option take into accounts facts such as "i don't want to be separated from my friends and family" and the kinds of narrative that would in principle be ones i'd appreciate having been in in retrospect and that sort of extrapolation considerations?

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Isekai Roulette tries to find the world that's the very best for you out of all the worlds you could possibly travel to! So if it's really important to you to be able to see your friends and family again, you should definitely end up in a world where you'll be able to find your way back. And "the kinds of narrative that you'd appreciate having been in in retrospect" is exactly the kind of consideration that the Spirit is most centrally taking into account when choosing things like that!
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Well that's very friendly of it. Of course, he only has this notebook's word for it but he only has this notebook's word for everything, including that picking the "stay here" option would in fact keep him here. But it would be a very, very strange seemingly omnipotent power that would leave him alone if he chooses to stay and that would instead be an evil genie or something if he chooses the roulette. Surely if it's going to respect his choices at all then it might as well respect implicit choices like this?

The failure mode, of course, is that it's not that omnipotent at all (it is presenting as a girly notebook rather than in literally any other way, after all, maybe it's just multipotent) and it can't do better than he can at figuring out what places he'd want to go to.

i'm having vague worries about how to guarantee that the Spirit will find somewhere like that for me, because I wouldn't trust another human to do it so the Spirit would need to know a lot about me to be able to figure this out

Him being in a story kind of complicates matters because on the one hand the author could in fact just figure out by fiat where the best place for him to go would be but on the other hand it might be a sadistic author that enjoys reader tears. He is a little bit of a sadistic author who enjoys reader tears.

...well, he supposes there are sadistic narratives that he'd be okay with participating in because of poignance. Just not ones where he's irretrievably broken or even temporarily broken or anything like that. He wants to stay mostly himself mostly okay with potentially patches of not okay in the middle.

Man, having your life be a story is a lot less interesting than reading a story. Dumbledore's death is tragic and poignant as a story but if his longterm mentor got murdered in front of him that would fuck him up so bad.

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The notebook, oblivious to any thought he hasn't written down, cheerfully replies,
That makes sense! The Spirit does know a lot about you, though. Or, I guess that depends what you mean by knowing. I'm not sure the Spirit does "knowing" or "thinking" or "acting" in the same kinds of ways that you or I would understand. But the Spirit is definitely really, really good at finding people the best places to live their own stories in ways they appreciate!
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the worry is that if a human tried to do this they wouldn't be able to actually know more than i do about myself such that any choice they make would necessarily be working off insufficient information to do better than me choosing

another worry is that it could be evil genieing me into having some poignant narrative where someone really important to me dies forever and that fucks me up and in theory if you're right about it being able to pick narratives i would like to be in then that wouldn't happen but on the other hand that is seriously constraining because i'll know that any deaths are temporary and all the stakes are kind of bounded and i'm not sure this tells stories the Spirit wants to tell

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