"I've never been." 

"I'll spoil you for all other partners!"

"I think you already have." She kisses him once, twice. 

"That's true. Lev does not strike me as a particularly good dancer."

"Me either. And I can't imagine people who can throw me in the air and catch me are common." 

"--I wish there were something I could do. To show you that I want to be yours as long as you will have me."

"You promised to wait and offered to take care of me if I decided to run and you're here with me."

"I don't know. A symbol. Or something."

"I can make something and mail it to Natalie and tell her to mail it to you — do you want a necklace, a bracelet, I don't really trust myself not to fuck up a ring —" 

"I'd love one."

She kisses him again. "Then I'll make you something and send it to my sister with instructions to send it to Ron with instructions to send it to you." 

Asher kisses her and holds her and fucks her.

It's not enough.

It isn't. Nothing would be. 

She stays as late in the morning as she possibly can, one more kiss turning into two or three or seven, but — 

But at some point she has to go. 

When Raine's gone Asher lies in the bed and cuddles a pillow and cries.

Raine will cry at some point, but not right now. 

She can't make herself eat. She isn't really trying to. 

Lev is making a somewhat concerned face. 

She doesn't notice; she isn't making eye contact with anyone. 

(If she makes a bracelet out of wire she won't have to figure out how to mold something this complicated — or she could go for a simpler shape, but she doesn't have anything to go into the setting — there are beads in the craft building, if she can just get into the craft building, or she brought bits of sea glass that could be made into pendants; you can't drill into glass but if you wrapped it with wire —) 

(It's not enough of a distraction. Nothing would be. But it helps.) 

After lunch Lev has his one-on-one with Christine. 

"I've been impressed with your progress in finding your root. Very few participants have made as much progress as you have in identifying their distorted thoughts by this point in the program."

"Thank you."

(The praise shouldn't make him feel good. It does.)

"I understand your relationship with Marlo has been a major factor in your progress."

Fuck.

"Yes, it has. He's a good friend."

"I am observant, Lev, I am aware that you're sleeping together."

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

He doesn't say anything, but his silence is a confession. 

She rustles the paper on her desk.

"I had high hopes, since you were progressing so well-- but maybe it's not the right time for you to make a change."