He can hold him quietly for a bit!

Leareth breathes in and out and pays a lot attention to what he's feeling, here and now.

Safe. Loved. 

...Like he doesn't deserve it, but if Vanyel were in his shoes and feeling that way, Leareth would tell him not to be silly, so he can do his best to tell himself the same thing. 

He wants Maitimo to stay - and wants that to be because Maitimo is happy here and finds it worthwhile, and he thinks that's true, right now, but he's not sure how good a read he has on Maitimo's feelings right now. He has the sense that Maitimo is doing a lot of...presenting a non-scary face to the situation. Which is very good of him, but also makes him slightly uneasy, since then it's harder to tell if separately Maitimo is separately, genuinely, happy about his end of things.

:...I think I would appreciate it if you were willing to let me read your mind: he sends, eventually, after lots of mulling it over. :Just for - one minute, that would be enough, I think it would help me feel - situated. Only if you are comfortable with that, though: 

I thought about it and I think - if I weren't comfortable then that'd be a worrying sign about whether we should do this at all. You're you, and you need to be - oriented, to feel safe - 

He takes off the amulet. 

It's strange how Leareth feels more fragile now that he's asked for this but maybe it's just that Maitimo's paying more attention, paying extremely close attention, and attributing every panic attack to himself when probably some of them have nothing to do with him. 

It's nice, petting Leareth's hair. It feels - evil - Vanyel pointed out that he would be hurting Leareth, if he carried that attitude into this, and Vanyel was right and yet it's hard to get around the fact that it feels evil, falling in love with a man, taking him prisoner, putting him together again, and then petting his hair while he sits on your lap and trembles - and maybe that means he's doing something wrong but also he always feels evil when he wants someone -

- he wants Leareth to recover. That's by far the most important thing. And if this is - a facet of the world, that it certainly is, one that Melkor would have firmly made salient - then it's a facet of the world Leareth wants a command of, wants to win at, wants to understand how to use to get what he wants, and Maitimo can relate to that, a lot, really, and maybe it's not what people are supposed to do but people aren't supposed to do any of the things Leareth has done - he meant to avoid thinking about that while Leareth was reading his mind, he tucks it away for later - anyway if that's what Leareth wants then Maitimo wants to show him, wants to help him figure it out - wants Leareth to feel competent to get what he wants, and to know what it is -

:Thank you. That is enough: Leareth reaches out. Takes Maitimo’s hand, places the amulet in it.

...Maitimo understands him almost frighteningly well.  He’s happy and nervous and confused all at once, almost enough to make him dizzy.

He puts it back on. You know, at first I wondered if you had a way around it. Then you'd get the benefits of my thinking not being constrained by awareness of mindreading and the benefits of reading my mind. It seems like it'd have to be tempting.

:...I suppose: Leareth shakes his head. :I actually try to avoid that sort of lie, especially to - people I wish to be allies with, who would feel betrayed if they found out. I will conceal information but that itself was no surprise up you - and therefore not really a betrayal, I think. It is very high overhead, to track a lie like that - avoid letting slip anything I ought have no way to know - and I prefer to reserve my mental capacity for other things:

He nods. He pets him. You sound the most like yourself when you're talking about - how you make decisions. It's very good.

:- I mean, I am not sure I could make new decisions that way, now. Decisions are - hard. But I remember the habits and heuristics I had before:

Nod. You remember it but it'd be - really scary to use it?

Nod. He’s trembling slightly again.

It's okay. It'll be okay.

:I think so. It is - getting better. Just...: It’s starting to feel hard to put words together. :Still scared:

Well, he can hold him and sing for as long as it's needed.

Leareth should eat something eventually. Maybe go for a walk, obviously he and Maitimo can’t obviously touch each other during that but they can talk. This feels like a decent amount of progress for one day and Leareth isn’t keen to push it further.

That sounds good to him. They can get food, and walk and talk about scouting the other continent, and then probably Leareth should rest. 

Probably. Humans need a lot of sleep and Leareth does in particular nowadays, he has more energy than he did at the start but still gets tired a lot faster than before.

He’d like it if Maitimo holds him and sings and pets him a bit while he’s falling asleep.

He'd be delighted.

Then he’ll have a content and pleased-with-himself Leareth fall asleep in his arms.

(Leareth is genuinely very happy with everything about today. He also feels - confused, and scared, and sort of sad - but he’s leaving those bits below the surface, to deal with later.)

Well, he's not a mindreader. Though he has noticed that Leareth used to push his thoughts at him rather than composing them, and is doing that less. Maybe it's that more often he has the energy to actually communicate with words. But it seems like it might not be just that?

He goes and sings by the beach until he's tired enough to sleep himself.

Leareth greets Maitimo with Mindspeech right away when he wakes up, but after that he wants some time alone. The inside of his head feels very loud today, for some reason, and he's not sure what to do to get it to stop that, except waiting and doing other things. 

Maitimo will attend linguistics guild meetings and check in on other recovering injured people here (mostly not the other Angband survivors).

Leareth has lunch with Vanyel in Vanyel's rooms. They mostly don't talk about Maitimo, because Leareth feels kind of awkward about it. 

(Vanyel finds it an embarrassing and difficult topic too, and will happily leave it alone.) 

:I would like to see you this afternoon: Leareth tells Maitimo after lunch. :If you are free: 

Certainly! Leareth is being more assertive about wanting him and that seems good.