This is worse than listening to people lust over my dad.

Since it's too late for me to never had heard this, just keep going!

You've got five minutes to push me up to fourth-circle so I can pick up modify memory.

I can confirm that at least one shadow find at least some shadows something that I'll round to attractive. Though it's hard to describe, and pretty different from how (at least some humans) found other humans attractive?

Was it "edible".

No, alas. (Although I did try.)

More... aesthetic? 

This is worse than listening to people lust over my dad.

I think the lady doth protest too much.

Ew ew ew ew ew ew no.

And she's still protesting it!

What further evidence do you need?

Pre-marital incest would bring her marriage contract and therefore her legitimacy into question.

Does anybody want to truthspell the queen and demand a straight answer?

None of this is relevant to the shadows. Send the attractive people out of the room so we can focus.

You won't get straight answers out of our own Ileosa Arabasti, HAH!

Sometimes my own wit does slay me.

If we send Cressida Kroft out of the room, it doesn't matter how much we focus. We'll still accomplish less.

Oh, and the queen might object to being kicked out or something.

Can we at least send out everyone who is neither important nor ugly?

Wait, how are we going to enforce that rule without first having a public debate on whether each person in this room is important and good-looking?

Attractive people can all be sent out to go ask Geb for help! They use their Splendor for something productive, we focus on the shadows, then everyone reconvenes once we need to make final decisions.

I told you we needed to vote on who the ugliest people in the room are!

Wait, how are we going to enforce that rule without first having a public debate on whether each person in this room is important and good-looking?

I expect a reasonable consensus to agree on the general bounds of both categories, but empiricism will tell us truly!

We should fight over who the important people in the room are, that way the most important ones will get stronger.

We should do an orgy to figure out who is hot. 

I expect a reasonable consensus to agree on the general bounds of both categories, but empiricism will tell us truly!

Why would you expect something that's never happened before?

That's not how it works. Even if we do, we must do it after figuring out who is hot and who isn't.

Have enough people finished praying and become clerics yet that we can heal everyone's injuries after the fighting (and Restore their stamina after the orgy)?

For some gods it's included in the prayer, as was clearly previously mentioned.

There's an objective answer here, isn't there?

Those guards who've been hired to protect the queen apparently have an official list of, for everyone in Korvosa, whether they're attractive or important.

Can't we just ask them?

We didn't have a list but can whip one up in a snap.

Okay, how about people come over here if you're joining the fighting, over here if you're joining the orgy, over here if you want to preemptively admit to being both hot and unimportant and go visit Geb or something